FabSwingers.com forum: 'Not Interested'

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Disclaimer: I know my profile is only a few weeks old, but I've had accounts here for months time before.

So, I'm finding it frustrating and a little confusing here. Many of my messages have either gotten left on read or just plain deleted.

Now, I understand the whole 'deleted/no reply = not interested' thing, but that notion seems a little vague when I've given it one last try by messaging those same at later dates to which I've received a reply.

So I'm wondering would fab consider updating the website to where there were more options to make it clear as to why messages were deleted or ignored.

I've seen the 'not interested buttton' suggestion before (which I agree with, personally).

Sometimes, due to the high volume or messages women receive, they do mass deletes — I get it — but though you can just take a delete as 'not interested' and keep it pushing, curious minds do wonder since there's no telling EXACTLY why.

This isn't a moan or rant – I just think this site could be made a lot simpler.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Even if there was a 'not interested' button on here I wouldn't use it to reply to messages I'm not interested in. I don't see the point.

I personally think they need to get rid of the sent items box.... Too many people obsess over it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Also.... How is adding another feature making the site simpler?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even if there was a 'not interested' button on here I wouldn't use it to reply to messages I'm not interested in. I don't see the point.

I personally think they need to get rid of the sent items box.... Too many people obsess over it. "

Completely agree. I don't look in my sent items that often, apart from to make a mental note that I sent a message, it was deleted with no reply, move on.

Fab shouldn't have to police how I interact with others. If you can't understand why you haven't had a response, what else would you struggle to understand?

p.s. and I know some women leave messages unread so thet they don't get "I saw you read my message, whats wrong with me?"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Also.... How is adding another feature making the site simpler? "

I just believe it could make it so that it's clear as to why no reply. I'm not in favour of being entitled to a reply, but it can be frustrating to people who do put the effort in. You get me?

And maybe it could reduce the spam from people who are persistent (I know some people don't give up, but that's what the block button is for, which is clear enough).

This is more toward stopping all the game-playing and stringing along, etc.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If Im ignoring or not reading your message then Im ignoring the little not interested or ignore button to press too

Release yourself from the stress, delete your sent box.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The site is really simple. No reply, no interest.

Ppl run their profiles as they see fit. If they don't delete, they don't delete, and everyone will have a different reason why they don't.

Best option, delete your sent messages. If you get a reply, great, if you don't, you don't know if it's read/deleted or what

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *irty desireWoman
over a year ago

newcatle

Just take an unread , left on read or just deleted as not interested.. simple

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Even if there was a 'not interested' button on here I wouldn't use it to reply to messages I'm not interested in. I don't see the point.

I personally think they need to get rid of the sent items box.... Too many people obsess over it.

Completely agree. I don't look in my sent items that often, apart from to make a mental note that I sent a message, it was deleted with no reply, move on.

Fab shouldn't have to police how I interact with others. If you can't understand why you haven't had a response, what else would you struggle to understand?

p.s. and I know some women leave messages unread so thet they don't get "I saw you read my message, whats wrong with me?""

Not so much policing – I wouldn't call it that. But I hear you, though. Fair points.

Maybe the sent section should be gotten rid of, to kill any of the cats' curiosities.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Also.... How is adding another feature making the site simpler?

I just believe it could make it so that it's clear as to why no reply. I'm not in favour of being entitled to a reply, but it can be frustrating to people who do put the effort in. You get me?

And maybe it could reduce the spam from people who are persistent (I know some people don't give up, but that's what the block button is for, which is clear enough).

This is more toward stopping all the game-playing and stringing along, etc."

It's already clear. If they want to chat with you the would reply. If you don't want to get strung along but someone then block them. All if the tools are already available.

Also.... I ask this on every thread of this type.... How will and inbox full of 'not interested' affect your mental health and self worth?

Seriously, spend some time out of your sent items and enjoy the site

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got through phases of just completely ignoring my inbox so messages sit on unread for a long time. Sending another message because the first one has been ignored is never successful unless it's from a friend. I wouldn't use a not interested button, I just stay out my inbox.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *isAdventure69Woman
over a year ago

Hampshire

Personally I don't actually want to know .

I don't need to hear/read of my flaws, I'm very aware of them.

The fact that they're not interested is reason enough.

And most likely there would be little I can do about it bar trying to convince them that they got it all wrong and that I am exactly what they're looking for , they're just not aware of it yet

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The site is really simple. No reply, no interest.

Ppl run their profiles as they see fit. If they don't delete, they don't delete, and everyone will have a different reason why they don't.

Best option, delete your sent messages. If you get a reply, great, if you don't, you don't know if it's read/deleted or what"

Yeah, at this point, I think I'm just gonna do that to keep my mindset positive as opposed to wondering what I've gotta do to change. Ignorance and bliss. Any reply I do get is a success and anything else is whatever – I'd never know.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

Will Fab change something to improve if based on member feedback? Extremely unlikely. Man, the list of tiny tiny little changes I'd love to be allowed to make. I'll code it all... just let me add any profile notes to the "you have blocked this profile" page, let me add a simple optional questionnaire for single guys to fill in to prove they read the profile. Let me remove the words "NEW!" from all the places they've been for a decade... :D

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"The site is really simple. No reply, no interest."

But as he said, that's absolutely NOT true universally. Often good messages are lost amongst the shite...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Also.... How is adding another feature making the site simpler?

I just believe it could make it so that it's clear as to why no reply. I'm not in favour of being entitled to a reply, but it can be frustrating to people who do put the effort in. You get me?

And maybe it could reduce the spam from people who are persistent (I know some people don't give up, but that's what the block button is for, which is clear enough).

This is more toward stopping all the game-playing and stringing along, etc.

It's already clear. If they want to chat with you the would reply. If you don't want to get strung along but someone then block them. All if the tools are already available.

Also.... I ask this on every thread of this type.... How will and inbox full of 'not interested' affect your mental health and self worth?

Seriously, spend some time out of your sent items and enjoy the site "

Hmmm, I mean... you could presume, but is it really clear, though? I guess it's just easier to take it as that than wonder – I'll take that much.

I'll take what you've said on board anyway.

To the mental health question: nothing – I like the clarity and brutal honesty. Would help me just move along and either continue or just call it a day, I suppose.

Thank you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I used another site where they had a polite “no thanks button”.

Folk just ignored it. Sent another message saying “I know you’re not interested but blah blah blah”.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The site is really simple. No reply, no interest.

Ppl run their profiles as they see fit. If they don't delete, they don't delete, and everyone will have a different reason why they don't.

Best option, delete your sent messages. If you get a reply, great, if you don't, you don't know if it's read/deleted or what

And that is how to use fab.

Changing your tactics to improve your chances moves you further away from who you really are.

My success over the years has been modest, but the friendships and playtimes have meant so much more because the ladies in question found me appealing (well once they actually met me and got to know the Fever behind the profile).

Fire and forget is the best way. If you catch someone's eye, you'll know!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ewrocksWoman
over a year ago

button moon

Replying means even if we then change filters, that person can still message.

Most I think look at the profile before the message, you've not asked for profile advice, but I will suggest forum searching that ridiculous 'warning'

For me thats a filter in itself

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Personally I don't actually want to know .

I don't need to hear/read of my flaws, I'm very aware of them.

The fact that they're not interested is reason enough.

And most likely there would be little I can do about it bar trying to convince them that they got it all wrong and that I am exactly what they're looking for , they're just not aware of it yet

That's fair enough – I'm in agreement to most degree there.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Will Fab change something to improve if based on member feedback? Extremely unlikely. Man, the list of tiny tiny little changes I'd love to be allowed to make. I'll code it all... just let me add any profile notes to the "you have blocked this profile" page, let me add a simple optional questionnaire for single guys to fill in to prove they read the profile. Let me remove the words "NEW!" from all the places they've been for a decade... :D"

It's a shame because so many things could be changed to improve the site's ecosystem making it a more gratifying, pleasant experience for users.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"The site is really simple. No reply, no interest.

But as he said, that's absolutely NOT true universally. Often good messages are lost amongst the shite..."

And how does a 'not interested' option reveal the good messages amongst the shite? There would still be shite messages but now we have to press a button to tell them we're not interested and unless that blocks them from messaging again then they'll still come back and ask why not.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The site is really simple. No reply, no interest.

But as he said, that's absolutely NOT true universally. Often good messages are lost amongst the shite..."

Precisely!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

While we are at it there could be a ‘Sorry, you’re slightly annoying!’ button, or may a ‘Whoa, easy on the cock photos dude!’ Or ‘You have potential, but your really need to clean your bedroom!’ button.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just take an unread , left on read or just deleted as not interested.. simple

Yeah . I agree with you on this. Far too many messages in my inbox to reply to .. Lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I used another site where they had a polite “no thanks button”.

Folk just ignored it. Sent another message saying “I know you’re not interested but blah blah blah”."

Yeah, no surprise there, but that's where the block button comes in handy. The 'no interested' is letting the other know, and if they still wish to continue, then it's more fool on them as they clearly have been informed.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Replying means even if we then change filters, that person can still message.

Most I think look at the profile before the message, you've not asked for profile advice, but I will suggest forum searching that ridiculous 'warning'

For me thats a filter in itself

Taken on board

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"The site is really simple. No reply, no interest.

But as he said, that's absolutely NOT true universally. Often good messages are lost amongst the shite...

Oh it doesn't. I see no reason for OPs feature, and adds a burden on to those with the mail boxes full of bilge. But there's just no universal way of using the site. I mean, I've had arguments here about what "fabulous" means as a body type category. Some people swear blind it means super sexy porn star model bodies...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"While we are at it there could be a ‘Sorry, you’re slightly annoying!’ button, or may a ‘Whoa, easy on the cock photos dude!’ Or ‘You have potential, but your really need to clean your bedroom!’ button. "

Haha. I'm not mad at those ones, at all. Bring 'em in.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Replying means even if we then change filters, that person can still message.

Most I think look at the profile before the message, you've not asked for profile advice, but I will suggest forum searching that ridiculous 'warning'

For me thats a filter in itself

Oh absolutely. Try asking them about why they think this place is a publically traded company when it isn't and they don't even know what your'e talking about!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

I can understand where you are coming from but I have many times politely replied stating I'm not interested. The next week I get the same copy & paste message as the first and then again have to reply the same. I don't like blocking for the forums games etc but if they don't even remember who they get replies saying 'not interested' from how are they going to remember a notification from a tick box?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I can understand where you are coming from but I have many times politely replied stating I'm not interested. The next week I get the same copy & paste message as the first and then again have to reply the same. I don't like blocking for the forums games etc but if they don't even remember who they get replies saying 'not interested' from how are they going to remember a notification from a tick box?

Yeah, I hear you, comprende.

I just think something could be done for sure. Not necessarily what I'm suggesting, but there's definitely room for improvement that could make this site better (in a way that would also filter out the spammers). Not sure what it is, but there's gotta be something.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ewrocksWoman
over a year ago

button moon

I gave up on this a long time ago. Now if I'm not interested, its rare I do anything other than just block. Makes it alot less irritating.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sending messages is all a bit transactional really unless you already know someone. And many women get so many messages that they can't read them all, let alone press a button on each of them.

My advice is to interact positively on the forums and, when allowed, attend some socials. You'll soon find people to gel with and make friends.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

There are as many reasons why people aren't interested/don't reply as there are people.

Some won't mind if you try again, some will. Bit like anything else in human interaction.

Adjust your expectations.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss

Yeah, I hear you, comprende.

I know what you mean but when the site has been going so long there is probably been lots of discussion of how to change it. It's not the easiest site to get used to using but after a while I definitely understand the reasons for things more.

I'll admit - the only time I look in my sent folder is for when I have accidentally deleted a message thread and not clicked the undo quick enough

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sending messages is all a bit transactional really unless you already know someone. And many women get so many messages that they can't read them all, let alone press a button on each of them.

My advice is to interact positively on the forums and, when allowed, attend some socials. You'll soon find people to gel with and make friends. "

Yeah, it figures – I gather that much.

Might try that out. I'm ready for clubs to open back up.

Thanks for the suggestion.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There are as many reasons why people aren't interested/don't reply as there are people.

Some won't mind if you try again, some will. Bit like anything else in human interaction.

Adjust your expectations."

Yeah, that's about right.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I might be not interested 'right now'.. But might be interested 'later' - so many reasons.... more time /more relaxed /feel like chatting

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I do absolutely appreciate your starting point, I will say. It's a lot better than is often seen.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's miserable when you send a decent message and get no reply. After a while it will be soul destroying.

Many women and couples have no empathy for anyone else but themselves and can't possibly understand - or care - how another person can feel. Evidence in this thread....

Chin up OP and welcome to the forums.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I might be not interested 'right now'.. But might be interested 'later' - so many reasons.... more time /more relaxed /feel like chatting "

Exactly

all these loopholes and grey areas unfilled like many kitties during the p(l)andemic.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I do absolutely appreciate your starting point, I will say. It's a lot better than is often seen. "

Thank you – I appreciate that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it's miserable when you send a decent message and get no reply. After a while it will be soul destroying.

Many women and couples have no empathy for anyone else but themselves and can't possibly understand - or care - how another person can feel. Evidence in this thread....

Chin up OP and welcome to the forums.

Yeah, it's akin to endless job applications. And yes, apparently that seems to be he case. Not letting it get under my skin or prevent sleep, though. Cheers, man

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I think it's miserable when you send a decent message and get no reply. After a while it will be soul destroying.

Many women and couples have no empathy for anyone else but themselves and can't possibly understand - or care - how another person can feel. Evidence in this thread....

Chin up OP and welcome to the forums.

I cared. I asked about his mental health seeing lots of not interested messages in his inbox.

I also do send messages that get no reply. I also note the site tools that tell me that when I messaged them last I got no (this may just be a site supporters thing). Same on dating sites. If I forget I've already messaged someone they usually show the last interaction between us. If they haven't replied to it I don't message again.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It can see the value of OP's suggestion. Most of the time I miss messages, then eventually bulk delete. It's not that I'm not interested in that person, I just didn't see the message. But equally, if men would message fewer women (particularly those who've indicated in their profile they won't be interested anyway) we'd all have better inboxes and guys might get more replies!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Are you suggesting that use of this button should be enforced, and if so, how? What would be the consequence of somebody deleting a message without using it? If there is no consequence, then why would people use it given you are talking about people who just bin messages anyway?

In order to tell you exactly why somebody is not interested, how many options do you think there should be? For example, should there be "Your message was total shit", "Your profile is awful", "You're ugly", "We have too many messages to be able to reply"? I'd be interested to see a list of options you want. I reckon the more complex you make it, the less it will be used.

Ultimately though, if you don't float somebody's boat, what more do you need to know than you don't float their boat? I don't really know why anything more than that is necessary. And you know you don't float somebody's boat because they deleted your message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"It can see the value of OP's suggestion. Most of the time I miss messages, then eventually bulk delete. It's not that I'm not interested in that person, I just didn't see the message. But equally, if men would message fewer women (particularly those who've indicated in their profile they won't be interested anyway) we'd all have better inboxes and guys might get more replies! "

But how would you being able to put extra effort into getting rid of messages leave you with fewer messages...?

I quite like a voluntary questionnaire you could enable based on your profile...

"If you want to send me your message

1) How many dogs do I have?

2) When did we last go to Gran Canaria?

3) What is the average velocity of an unladen swallow?"

Now THAT would remove 90% of shit messages, right? :D

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Ultimately though, if you don't float somebody's boat, what more do you need to know than you don't float their boat? I don't really know why anything more than that is necessary. And you know you don't float somebody's boat because they deleted your message. "

But you DON'T know that... "Sorry, had to delete unread 1000 unread messages"... right? Nothing means anything unilaterally.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Disclaimer: I know my profile is only a few weeks old, but I've had accounts here for months time before.

So, I'm finding it frustrating and a little confusing here. Many of my messages have either gotten left on read or just plain deleted.

So I'm wondering would fab consider updating the website to where there were more options to make it clear as to why messages were deleted or ignored.

I've seen the 'not interested buttton' suggestion before (which I agree with, personally).

This isn't a moan or rant – I just think this site could be made a lot simpler."

OP, as one half of a couple, one of us may have read the message and not the other and have left it there it for the other one to read and/or respond to.

As others have said, many people use different methods of using their account.

If I feel that someone has put effort in their message I will polity reply saying no thanks, sometimes you get a thanks reply, other times you get a why reply. If I have just had a handful of why replies, then the next one is most probably going to be ignored/deleted. A lot will depend on my mood and what time I have.

You need to find what works for you and enjoy rather than stress xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

An awful lot of energy seems to be spent wondering about the messages that don't get a reply. Maybe best to just forget about them and focus on the replies you do get?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why care what’s the reason no reply is the answer full stop if you had 500 messages which the gals get would you reply to everyone of them I wouldn’t

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it's miserable when you send a decent message and get no reply. After a while it will be soul destroying.

Many women and couples have no empathy for anyone else but themselves and can't possibly understand - or care - how another person can feel. Evidence in this thread....

Chin up OP and welcome to the forums.

I cared. I asked about his mental health seeing lots of not interested messages in his inbox."

Much appreciated

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

There you go

glad you catch my drift.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But how would you being able to put extra effort into getting rid of messages leave you with fewer messages...?

I quite like a voluntary questionnaire you could enable based on your profile...

"If you want to send me your message

1) How many dogs do I have?

2) When did we last go to Gran Canaria?

3) What is the average velocity of an unladen swallow?"

Now THAT would remove 90% of shit messages, right? :D"

Yeah, those profiles do make things easier. Would be good if there was maybe a prompt box where you could reply directly to a question asked by whoever it is you're about to message.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"OP, as one half of a couple, one of us may have read the message and not the other and have left it there it for the other one to read and/or respond to.

As others have said, many people use different methods of using their account.

You need to find what works for you and enjoy rather than stress xx

I didn't think of that, actually

thank you for bringing it to my attention – that's one piece of clarity

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"An awful lot of energy seems to be spent wondering about the messages that don't get a reply. Maybe best to just forget about them and focus on the replies you do get? "

Yeah, this is the approach I've started taking as of today.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

But how would you being able to put extra effort into getting rid of messages leave you with fewer messages...?

I quite like a voluntary questionnaire you could enable based on your profile...

"If you want to send me your message

1) How many dogs do I have?

2) When did we last go to Gran Canaria?

3) What is the average velocity of an unladen swallow?"

Now THAT would remove 90% of shit messages, right? :D

Yeah, those profiles do make things easier. Would be good if there was maybe a prompt box where you could reply directly to a question asked by whoever it is you're about to message."

Well my daft idea would be a holding screen you have to answer to get past. A nice idea to muse, but will obviously never happen.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's miserable when you send a decent message and get no reply. After a while it will be soul destroying.

Many women and couples have no empathy for anyone else but themselves and can't possibly understand - or care - how another person can feel. Evidence in this thread....

Chin up OP and welcome to the forums.

I cared. I asked about his mental health seeing lots of not interested messages in his inbox.

I said many. Not all.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/04/21 14:32:03]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why care what’s the reason no reply is the answer full stop if you had 500 messages which the gals get would you reply to everyone of them I wouldn’t "

Except I'm on about the messages that are opened, not just every message received – I understand there's simply not enough time in a day to tend to every message when you have other duties. But if you have the time to open, you must if not surely have the time to respond [to ones you want to], depending on the nature or volume of the message (some take more thought). I know that probably sounded like answering my own question in a way – I'm just speaking in context to the specific cases where it's not black & white.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lenn FairlightMan
over a year ago

East Kent

"I think it's miserable when you send a decent message and get no reply. After a while it will be soul destroying.

Many women and couples have no empathy for anyone else but themselves and can't possibly understand - or care - how another person can feel. Evidence in this thread....

Chin up OP and welcome to the forums.

That's a lovely reply. And absolutely spot on. So many people seem to approach Fab selfishly, it is the profiles that show a bit of humility, thoughtfulness, good humour, capacity for wanting to share a fun time rather than making a meet all about themselves etc that really stand out.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Just take not interested as the default position ... then when you get a I'm interested it's a nice surprise

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

"Why care what’s the reason no reply is the answer full stop if you had 500 messages which the gals get would you reply to everyone of them I wouldn’t

I do reply to the ones that I want to. I even occasionally send a 'no thanks' to some of the ones that I'm not interested in that have at least put effort in to the message. The ones that are clearly a cut and paste message, ones that have very obviously not read my profile, or ones that show no effort whatsoever, I don't waste my time on those at all.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it's miserable when you send a decent message and get no reply. After a while it will be soul destroying.

Many women and couples have no empathy for anyone else but themselves and can't possibly understand - or care - how another person can feel. Evidence in this thread....

Chin up OP and welcome to the forums.

Most definitely!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The trick is to make em chase you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why care what’s the reason no reply is the answer full stop if you had 500 messages which the gals get would you reply to everyone of them I wouldn’t

That's a good ethos/system to go with. Fair doings.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *irty desireWoman
over a year ago

newcatle

"Just take an unread , left on read or just deleted as not interested.. simple

Yeah . I agree with you on this. Far too many messages in my inbox to reply to .. Lol

You’re welcome in my box any time

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread