FabSwingers.com forum: Apologising?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What do you apologise for?

Taking up space?

Enforcing a boundary?

Saying no?

Asking for clarity?

Not agreeing with someone?

Putting yourself first?

There’s more, what would you add?

We should not apologise for any of these things. My question is, do you anyway, or are you confident that you don’t need to?

You don’t need to apologise for being you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are you. Why appologise unless you acted like a complete tool there is no need. Some people will suck the life out of you if you allow them. Life is to short to question yourself all the time for others actions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/04/21 09:18:06]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What I do during day to day people apologise just for opening their mouth’s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I apologise for breathing the same air..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/04/21 09:18:43]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What do you apologise for?

Taking up space?

Enforcing a boundary?

Saying no?

Asking for clarity?

Not agreeing with someone?

Putting yourself first?

There’s more, what would you add?

We should not apologise for any of these things. My question is, do you anyway, or are you confident that you don’t need to?

You don’t need to apologise for being you

I only apologise if I break any of those things, not for upholding them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I apologise if I've done something wrong.

I used to apologise for being too loud/hyper/sad/annoying/quiet/worried...i could go on. But I try to never apologise for being me anymore.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest. "

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm British

I apologise for way too much

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By *ikesEmBigMan
over a year ago

Herts

Sorry for putting it in the wrong hole

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I apologise if I've done something wrong.

I used to apologise for being too loud/hyper/sad/annoying/quiet/worried...i could go on. But I try to never apologise for being me anymore.

Oh I love that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't ask the right to live so I won't apologise for it.

However, everything is down to context. I may apologise for all the things aforementioned because I realised that I acted on a selfish interest. Which leads me to question if there exist actions that are free of interest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I apologise for caring too much at times. Heh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I apologise when I don’t hear.... a simple “sorry can you repeat that” I think giving thought I probably apologise a lot..... sometimes it’s respectful I think xxxx

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By *oxyVikingCouple
over a year ago

East Anglia

"What do you apologise for?

Taking up space?

Enforcing a boundary?

Saying no?

Asking for clarity?

Not agreeing with someone?

Putting yourself first?

There’s more, what would you add?

We should not apologise for any of these things. My question is, do you anyway, or are you confident that you don’t need to?

You don’t need to apologise for being you

I apologise for all of the above things. I know I probably shouldn’t most of the time. But find it incredibly hard not to, it’s like the default setting, apologising for everything. Freya

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I apologise when I'm in the wrong. When I've hurt someone and I genuinely am sorry for it (although the latter might be more for my benefit). I do apologise for asking for clarity - sometimes I ask someone what was meant by x, y and z and their response is so... impolite my instinctive reaction is to apologise.

You don't have to agree with anyone but on the same hand you don't have to be a dick with your disagreement or make it personal.

We do apologise for daft things, for being us... yet on the same hand we don't say sorry and own our crap often enough, instead preferring to shift blame on to others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Until covid nothing after covid everything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean? "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m sorry I haven’t replied to your question earlier.

I was reading another thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lot of apologies are hollow

If your words start 'I'm sorry, but...' it isn't an apology, it is an attempt to validate

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

Great response

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

If I have went outside of my own character and acted in a way which is detrimental to my growth, then I apologise.

I don't apologise because I have acted out of someones elses expectation of me.

If someone is shity to me then I don't expect them to apolgise as I was the person who miss-judged that they met my expectations and I miss-placed my respect for them, which is an error on my part, not theirs.

I can only learn and grow through my own self realisation, not from others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm English so I apologise at least 40 times a day.

I've even just said sorry to the cat for brushing past him by mistake.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Also, I’m not saying don’t apologise, of course if you’ve done something wrong, apologise, but this is about not being sorry for taking up space, and being you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm English so I apologise at least 40 times a day.

I've even just said sorry to the cat for brushing past him by mistake. "

Well that’s different

, animals are different, any excuse to talk to them

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I'm English so I apologise at least 40 times a day.

I've even just said sorry to the cat for brushing past him by mistake. "

Such a bumbling, rambling Englishman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of apologies are hollow

If your words start 'I'm sorry, but...' it isn't an apology, it is an attempt to validate "

I’m sorry that you feel that way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I apologise for breathing the same air..

No need to. I’ll gladly share mine with you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

Great response

Not just what I just said, but how does it make you feel about apologising fir those things you really don't need to, I know when I do I beat myself up and feel generally shit about myself, as I haven't put my self first, and been dishonest with towards self

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of apologies are hollow

If your words start 'I'm sorry, but...' it isn't an apology, it is an attempt to validate "

Spot on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone asks me to do something I can't or don't want to do I might say,'Apologies but I can't.' The apology is not for anything I've done wrong but rather if I've upset or inconvenienced them by my 'no'. It definitely can be an overused social reflex but between friends I'm not sure it's a bad thing to show empathy in this small way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m sorry I haven’t replied to your question earlier.

I was reading another thread."

I’m sorry I didn’t reply to this brilliant comment sooner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of apologies are hollow

If your words start 'I'm sorry, but...' it isn't an apology, it is an attempt to validate

I’m sorry that you feel that way "

or that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, "
what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose"

I think I’d say to this, you need to be in a position to please yourself, before you can please another.

If you don’t put your oxygen mask on first, you won’t be able to put anyone else’s on either.

If your cup is empty, you can’t pour into another.

Sending hugs lovely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose"

In what you just said, where is the love and compassion that you would show to others to please, shown to yourself? In my experience I have to be able to have those things for myself to show it to others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We only apologise when we feel we are in the wrong or someone else is affected by our actions. When it comes to feelings, I will always apologise both ways as we can't always see ourselves as in the wrong. That being said things I will never apologise for is having an opinion, putting myself first and being me

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

"Also, I’m not saying don’t apologise, of course if you’ve done something wrong, apologise, but this is about not being sorry for taking up space, and being you. "
NO, never apologise for being you, even the fact that you ask the question proves that you look to self improve and evolve and grow. If you doesn't suit the expectations of someone else then they have put assumsions on who you are, that is their mistake not yours. You be you, that is all you can be and not be what someone else thinks you are.

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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

"I apologise if I've done something wrong.

I used to apologise for being too loud/hyper/sad/annoying/quiet/worried...i could go on. But I try to never apologise for being me anymore.

"
this for me to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

I think I’d say to this, you need to be in a position to please yourself, before you can please another.

If you don’t put your oxygen mask on first, you won’t be able to put anyone else’s on either.

If your cup is empty, you can’t pour into another.

Sending hugs lovely. "
no hugs i dont want a virus

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

I think I’d say to this, you need to be in a position to please yourself, before you can please another.

If you don’t put your oxygen mask on first, you won’t be able to put anyone else’s on either.

If your cup is empty, you can’t pour into another.

Sending hugs lovely. no hugs i dont want a virus

Socially distanced obv

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone here actually from Surrey?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

I think I’d say to this, you need to be in a position to please yourself, before you can please another.

If you don’t put your oxygen mask on first, you won’t be able to put anyone else’s on either.

If your cup is empty, you can’t pour into another.

Sending hugs lovely. no hugs i dont want a virus

Socially distanced obv

"
are you mr tickle?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words "

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Anyone here actually from Surrey? "

I’ve been waiting to shoe horn that in somewhere, I see someone from Essex and I’m on it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

You have to be able to give to yourself first, lovely

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I only have to apologise for two things.

Everything I say and everything I do

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?"

Please don’t derail the thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m incredulous when people apologise for their young children wandering up to me with an offer is a sweet or whatever. I engage with the child and the parent comes running up apologising as if their child had disturbed me. I’m not certain what the child is picking up from that. For me, it turns what was a positive interaction into something a little unpleasant.

Sorry, not sure if that was relevant.

There, that’s what I apologise for. Going off on a tangent.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

I got your meaning.....in that feeding to please, we lose sight of ourselves and our needs, wants and desires being replaced by a feeling that someone else's needs, wants and desires are more important than our own.. is that right?

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"What do you apologise for?

Taking up space?

Enforcing a boundary?

Saying no?

Asking for clarity?

Not agreeing with someone?

Putting yourself first?

There’s more, what would you add?

We should not apologise for any of these things. My question is, do you anyway, or are you confident that you don’t need to?

You don’t need to apologise for being you

When the waiter brings my soup and theres a pube in it.

I tend to only apologise where I need to, but I will use “sorry” and “excuse me” when trying to move past people in a crowded room.

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

I’m rubbish at apologising. I’m so stubborn. I eventually will say it though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?"

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't ask the right to live so I won't apologise for it.

Like the intent behind the apology? Analysing it and breaking it down.

Why? - I was a twat?

Intent? - To apologise

Impact? - To appease yourself and your moral grounding? ease your conscience? Because it's the right thing to do

Seems there is more benefit to the apologiser than there is to to the person the apology is aimed at...who just gets the satisfaction of receiving an apology - wow thanks! Does it validate your feelings receiving it? Sense of justice? Even though the apology could have a selfish intent behind it

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

For far too much.

But then I have quite a few issues and am I survivor of emotional abuse, so I find it difficult at times to put my needs and feelings first

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

I have to apologise alot for my farts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I'm in the wrong I apologise.

No point in apologising for something someone else has done

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m rubbish at apologising. I’m so stubborn. I eventually will say it though. "

Is this when you or someone else feels that you’ve done something wrong?

I’m talking about apologising for being you, taking up space etc

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Sometimes it feels like I apologise for just existing. Luke

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sometimes it feels like I apologise for just existing. Luke "

You have every right to be here, and existing

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By *ecretlivesCouple
over a year ago

FABWatch HQ

Being a social nicety doesn't wear out apologising.

I apologise when I have assumed something - incorrectly (obviously!) or sometimes even when I am right. Taking away a choice is never a fair approach.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal "

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most if us apologise far too much - but hardly any of it is meant sincerely.

Saying sorry is a part of being British and seen as polite.

As most of us can't be arsed with a confrontation or get the sack at work we say it to appease people.

A genuine apology is usually reserved for the people we care about and want to keep in our lives.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often apologise for things I shouldn't need to. I do it because of my own insecurity though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From childhood I apologised for everything. If I made a decision I apologised to others because I was removing their right to choose. And I thanked people for things I didn't need to. By the time I got to my 30s I stopped saying it as much because I knew it made people uncomfortable and my real personality was coming out.

The conflict between the two mindsets was a big reason I went to therapy.

I realised it was my self esteem. Because of trauma at a young age I didn't feel equal to others. I was less than. Anything I did must have been an inconvenience to others.

It was my fault after all.

My adult self was judging and blaming my child self. So I worked on that.

My self esteem is much better now. Every once in a while I torture myself about something but I'm old enough now that I care less.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

When does it become more about others feelings than your own, going into the realms of people pleasing down to societal niceties, and why do people do tht, instead of being true to themselves and standing in your truth, what if your only truth was to please another thats what made you happiest now that is gone are left without purpose

You have to be able to give to yourself first, lovely

"
i wank 3 times per day and tweek my nipples 5 times thats enough love

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I apologise if I'm wrong.

I apologise if I've stood on your toe.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many"

I’ve asked you once to stop detailing the thread!

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By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

Apologise for nothing........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

I’ve asked you once to stop detailing the thread!

Twice normally does the trick

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many"

Yawn, ill be waiting for your apology

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I apologise if my actions or comments have inadvertently hurt another person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

Yawn, ill be waiting for your apology "

You really Think I need to ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

Yawn, ill be waiting for your apology

You really Think I need to ? "

You've been asked not to derail the thread, so ill.leave it here with you, i love you

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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago

Near Marlborough

I say sorry if I’ve been a twat.

I say sorry if I’ve hurt or upset someone or let them down somehow.

I say sorry when I stand on small bugs

I say sorry when I fuck stuff up.

I say sorry when I forget everyone’s birthday.

V x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a lot of times it's said as a social nicety as opposed to a heartfelt apology to be honest.

This is kind of my point though, it’s a nicety, or, you’re apologising for just being there...do you know what I mean?

This^^

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

Yawn, ill be waiting for your apology

You really Think I need to ?

You've been asked not to derail the thread, so ill.leave it here with you, i love you "

Thanks

I love me 2

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

I’ve asked you once to stop detailing the thread!

Apologising for been rude is a starting point...

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I don't appologise any more for being me, it may hurt when people say I'm wrong for my preferences for example.

I'll appologise always if I've upset someone. Even if I still disagree with them I could have chosen by words better to express myself.

I always say sorry of someone else bumps into me, what is that all about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Freedom of speech will likely always offend someone.

Debating questions may also do the same

Am i sorry for that ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

I’ve asked you once to stop detailing the thread!

Apologising for been rude is a starting point..."

You tell me where exactly I’ve been rude, and I’ll apologise

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

"I’m rubbish at apologising. I’m so stubborn. I eventually will say it though.

Is this when you or someone else feels that you’ve done something wrong?

I’m talking about apologising for being you, taking up space etc "

Oh no.... I used to apologise loads for me.

I’ve learnt a few lessons over the last couple of years. I definitely won’t apologise for being me anymore. Take me as I am or do one.

Life is far too short x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now now people

Keep it nice no arguing

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By * Lexi xWoman
over a year ago

stockport

"Freedom of speech will likely always offend someone.

Debating questions may also do the same

Am i sorry for that ? "

You sound just like my boyfriend.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word used way too often without meaning, same as those other 3 words that's used and never really meant

It's life

Sorry is an action not just words

How many failed relationships you had in your life time?

What business is it of yours? Sorry not sorry, also very of topic n personal

Trying to prove a point and I'm thinking not many

I’ve asked you once to stop detailing the thread!

Apologising for been rude is a starting point...

You tell me where exactly I’ve been rude, and I’ll apologise "

Well that’s a good example. You can’t be adult and not know when to apologise or not

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m rubbish at apologising. I’m so stubborn. I eventually will say it though.

Is this when you or someone else feels that you’ve done something wrong?

I’m talking about apologising for being you, taking up space etc

Oh no.... I used to apologise loads for me.

I’ve learnt a few lessons over the last couple of years. I definitely won’t apologise for being me anymore. Take me as I am or do one.

Life is far too short x"

I love this

. That’s what I’m talking about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m rubbish at apologising. I’m so stubborn. I eventually will say it though.

Is this when you or someone else feels that you’ve done something wrong?

I’m talking about apologising for being you, taking up space etc

Oh no.... I used to apologise loads for me.

I’ve learnt a few lessons over the last couple of years. I definitely won’t apologise for being me anymore. Take me as I am or do one.

Life is far too short x

I love this

. That’s what I’m talking about

Also I never mentioned you were rude,

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

Sorry is just a word, it’s used too often by people that are paying it lip service. The meaning and thought behind it are what matters. If you’re saying sorry you should be acknowledging your mistake or wrong doing and not doing it again. This is far too often not the case, unfortunately.

What I would love is for people to genuinely be sorry and have an intention of not repeating the same thing. Example: hitting the back of your leg with a trolley more than once on a shopping trip. It’s simply not on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to always apologise for absolutely everything. I've said sorry for so many things that weren't worth saying sorry for.

I refuse to do so now unless I'm in the wrong or if I feel like I've upset someone. I'm not stubborn and have no issues admitting my mistakes so it's never an issue for me to apologise.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorry is just a word, it’s used too often by people that are paying it lip service. The meaning and thought behind it are what matters. If you’re saying sorry you should be acknowledging your mistake or wrong doing and not doing it again. This is far too often not the case, unfortunately.

Absolutely this. As someone else said, it’s the actions that back up the apology.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

everything, nothing.

meh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams. "

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

"everything, nothing.

meh

Px "

I was the same at your age, seriously somehow with age you don't. One benefit of getting older x

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By *atricia ParnelWoman
over a year ago

In a town full of colours

I apologise when I've fucked up, take ownership and rectify, never say sorry for the sake of it as its meaningless and the amount of people who use sorry as a it will make it all right bakes my brain

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea. "

Some great thinking points here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea. "

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

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By *laytime432Man
over a year ago

Swindon

We apologise far more than we need to, i would say more out of the habit of etticut rather than actually needing to, agreed that when its called for its neccesary, but i used to apologise far more than i needed to, then i kearnt about nyself more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence "

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea. "

I agree I'm not perfect but I like to think I can get my point across without being irrational. It maybe because of the career I'm in everything is questioned to a massive degree. So I can take constructive criticism even if it hurts.

I think people as a whole should do better to formulate a good argument.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger"

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic "

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Freedom of speech will likely always offend someone.

Debating questions may also do the same

Am i sorry for that ?

You sound just like my boyfriend."

Your boyfriend sounds like a bit of a legend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

I think people as a whole should do better to formulate a good argument.

Couldn't agree more with you there.

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By *owhambamMan
over a year ago

clacton

I apologise for things that I deem may of upset someone even if it hasn’t. Many a time I’ve said sorry to hear back from the other person stating they hadn’t even noticed. So maybe it’s my values that I need too look at

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction. "

I get the uncontrolled reaction, if there is no level of emotional intelligence or self awareness, however as humans we have the ability to regulate our actions based on emotions, thoughts and feelings, now its comes into cognitive behaviour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A lot of apologies are hollow

If your words start 'I'm sorry, but...' it isn't an apology, it is an attempt to validate "

Disagree. Recently I had to tell someone they hadn't got a job they really wanted and I probably did say those words. I wasn't apologising for the decision but I was genuinely sorry for them and their disappointment. Empathy is not validation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

We do, or at least, we believe that we do. But we really don't.

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By *MrandMrsRedxCouple
over a year ago

Wiltshire

I feel guilt stronger than most and overthink everything. If I feel I’ve done wrong or overthink myself into that then I’ll apologise too much and over correct a situation that never needed it.

I am getting better though, the Mrs is great for me. Everything is getting better.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I feel guilt stronger than most and overthink everything. If I feel I’ve done wrong or overthink myself into that then I’ll apologise too much and over correct a situation that never needed it.

I am getting better though, the Mrs is great for me. Everything is getting better.

Mr"

Recognition is a great start

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

We do, or at least, we believe that we do. But we really don't. "

Of course we do, so question do you react to similar situations in exactly the same way, each n every time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

We do, or at least, we believe that we do. But we really don't.

Of course we do, so question do you react to similar situations in exactly the same way, each n every time? "

Absolutely not, yet some situations trigger the same disgusting affect !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ll never apologise for being me.

I will apologise if I think I’ve done or said something I shouldn’t have and especially if I realise I’ve upset someone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ll never apologise for being me.

I will apologise if I think I’ve done or said something I shouldn’t have and especially if I realise I’ve upset someone.

Perfect

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

We do, or at least, we believe that we do. But we really don't.

Of course we do, so question do you react to similar situations in exactly the same way, each n every time?

Absolutely not, yet some situations trigger the same disgusting affect ! "
only if you allow it to, only you can change your script in life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If society had it's own way the male specie would be apologising for simply being a male

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/04/21 10:34:32]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know what? It always seems to me that sorry seems to be a very difficult word to say.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You know what? It always seems to me that sorry seems to be a very difficult word to say. "

Sorry seems to be the hardest word?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I apologise when I'm in the wrong. When I've hurt someone and I genuinely am sorry for it (although the latter might be more for my benefit). I do apologise for asking for clarity - sometimes I ask someone what was meant by x, y and z and their response is so... impolite my instinctive reaction is to apologise.

You don't have to agree with anyone but on the same hand you don't have to be a dick with your disagreement or make it personal.

We do apologise for daft things, for being us... yet on the same hand we don't say sorry and own our crap often enough, instead preferring to shift blame on to others."

Meli:

What do mean when you say “ I genuinely am sorry for it (although the latter might be more for my benefit).” How so does it benefit you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

We do, or at least, we believe that we do. But we really don't.

Of course we do, so question do you react to similar situations in exactly the same way, each n every time?

Absolutely not, yet some situations trigger the same disgusting affect ! only if you allow it to, only you can change your script in life "

Nope. I can't. They are emotional response I can't change. I can change the disgust felt when reading racist comments.

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By *arol321Woman
over a year ago

Poole

When I say no to someone who messages me. Come to think of it all my ‘no thanks’ type of responses start with sorry!

Sorry you’re too short for me - I’m heightest!

Sorry you’re too far away from me

Sorry I’m not a fan of beards

Sorry you have too much body hair for me

Sorry you’re not my type

Maybe I need to rethink this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I say no to someone who messages me. Come to think of it all my ‘no thanks’ type of responses start with sorry!

Sorry you’re too short for me - I’m heightest!

Sorry you’re too far away from me

Sorry I’m not a fan of beards

Sorry you have too much body hair for me

Sorry you’re not my type

Maybe I need to rethink this.

Stop being sorry and fuck those ppl Carole123 !

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By *ornyhappyCouple
over a year ago

perth

I say sorry/apologise all the time, even for things I have absolutely no control over.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

We do, or at least, we believe that we do. But we really don't.

Of course we do, so question do you react to similar situations in exactly the same way, each n every time?

Absolutely not, yet some situations trigger the same disgusting affect ! only if you allow it to, only you can change your script in life

Nope. I can't. They are emotional response I can't change. I can change the disgust felt when reading racist comments."

F&B were talking about diffrent responses im on about physical responses based on those emotional responses

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I say no to someone who messages me. Come to think of it all my ‘no thanks’ type of responses start with sorry!

Sorry you’re too short for me - I’m heightest!

Sorry you’re too far away from me

Sorry I’m not a fan of beards

Sorry you have too much body hair for me

Sorry you’re not my type

Maybe I need to rethink this.

Stop being sorry and fuck those ppl Carole123 !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am too shallow for this thread.

Sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If society had it's own way the male specie would be apologising for simply being a male

Aint that the truth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Should I be sorry for being sexually confident ?

Should i be sorry for having a big fat cock ?

We can't tell folk to be themselves then spit dummies out when they are and it offends us

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By *rincess PhoenixWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

I used to apologise at work for disagreeing with someone, for being right, for being too quiet, for working hard etc but now I only apologise if I've actually done something wrong and one colleague hates it! She prefers me to be weak and a people pleaser so she can manipulate me now she just tries spreading rumours about me instead

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I used to apologise at work for disagreeing with someone, for being right, for being too quiet, for working hard etc but now I only apologise if I've actually done something wrong and one colleague hates it! She prefers me to be weak and a people pleaser so she can manipulate me now she just tries spreading rumours about me instead "

Good for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Should I be sorry for being sexually confident ?

Should i be sorry for having a big fat cock ?

We can't tell folk to be themselves then spit dummies out when they are and it offends us "
should be sorry for running on ego when it's not needed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Should I be sorry for being sexually confident ?

Should i be sorry for having a big fat cock ?

We can't tell folk to be themselves then spit dummies out when they are and it offends us should be sorry for running on ego when it's not needed

Your entitled to your opinion and even if your correct that don't mean I'm wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Should I be sorry for being sexually confident ?

Should i be sorry for having a big fat cock ?

We can't tell folk to be themselves then spit dummies out when they are and it offends us should be sorry for running on ego when it's not needed

Why? Because you tell him too? His opinions and thoughts are just as valid as anyones, but he gets shot down for it. That is not debating that's dictating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Should I be sorry for being sexually confident ?

Should i be sorry for having a big fat cock ?

We can't tell folk to be themselves then spit dummies out when they are and it offends us should be sorry for running on ego when it's not needed

Your entitled to your opinion and even if your correct that don't mean I'm wrong

"
I don't say your wrong, were all entitled to be ourselves, and shouldn't be made to feel a way about that or to.apologise for being so

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I would apologise if I bumped into you or let the door shut and I didn’t see you behind me, I apologise if I get the wrong end of the stick and go onto misinform others, however I won’t apologise for being me and all the things that make me me

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Mostly I apologise for expressing sexual interest in people who it turns out don't like me back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I'm wrong i fall on my sword and 100% take accountability and try to fix

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mostly I apologise for expressing sexual interest in people who it turns out don't like me back. "
why do you do that though

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Mostly I apologise for expressing sexual interest in people who it turns out don't like me back. why do you do that though "

Because it must be somewhere on a gradient between "awkward", "uncomfortable" and "scary" finding out that a guy twice your size would really like to fuck you.

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By *elethWoman
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

[Removed by poster at 11/04/21 12:41:26]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think there's a proper art to debating completely opposite opinions. There aren't many who can manage it without letting emotions get in the way, I'm including myself in this.

Disagreement on a subject should not require appologies or throwing dummies out of prams.

Humans aren't rational beings. But we are emotional before anything else unfortunately. Political discourses are built on that idea.

Within that tho f&b emotional intelligence, needs to be employed thats with the prerequisite that some have emotional intelligence

Oh definitely. But emotional intelligence doesn't prevent you to emotionally implicated in a decision. Which will may affect your decision.

Everyone has a trigger

Emotional intelligence helps us to deal with those triggers, in a manner that is not detrimental to others or self, mitigating harm, then having to apologise, to get back onto topic

Totally I see emotional intelligence as face-work or impression management theory. Like an actor on stage who acts according to the situation. Yet even, something may trigger uncontrollable reaction.

We do, or at least, we believe that we do. But we really don't.

Of course we do, so question do you react to similar situations in exactly the same way, each n every time?

Absolutely not, yet some situations trigger the same disgusting affect ! only if you allow it to, only you can change your script in life

Nope. I can't. They are emotional response I can't change. I can change the disgust felt when reading racist comments."
I went to an anger management course to help with this.

I have to avoid triggering forum threads. Or post something and walk away. I probably put too much thought into my posts on serious topics and definitely put too much emotion and vulnerability into my replies also but it helps me deal with things.

On the forums its too easy to get dragged into arguments. Fighting your corner. Defending your opinion or your friends.

I found it useful to remember the following.

The truth is often somewhere between my idea of the truth and yours.

My opinion is no different to yours. No more correct either.

Your life has given you different perspectives than I have. This means you see the world in different way.

If I attack then you will defend and defensive people are not going to listen. So If I want you to listen I shouldn't attack.

And sometimes you just have to leave people with their stupidity

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m sorry I haven’t replied to your question earlier.

I was reading another thread.

I’m sorry I didn’t reply to this brilliant comment sooner "

Not at all old sport!

I was just tickled pink that you bothered at all.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

If im in the wrong i find it easy to apologize. I dont apologize on a whim and definetly not for just being me

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

I save my apologies for when they’re genuinely needed. If I say sorry then I really mean it.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I've been conditioned to feel guilty for pretty much everything and to apologise for basically existing.

So I do.

But I'm slowly learning not to, and I'm trying to stop apologising for existing so much.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

I read about half way down.

Contrary to what many say I do believe that sometimes you have to apologise for being you .....

Saying, 'Oh that's just me. That's just the way I am.' is pretty anti social in my book and contemptuous of others and communities.

I agree with F n B ..... that it's mostly contextual.

I agree with Meli who apologises if she thinks she's done wrong.

I used to apologise if 'I' thought i'd done wrong.

To good friends though ( one who took the huff last week and who I love dearly ) I apologise unreservedly with a 'it was not my intention to hurt you' ...... (he's a macho baby with a big ego ) Cos ... people you love are allowed to err and I value friends. ( in the true sense - not the fucking mates in five minutes facebook sense )

I'd never say sorry if someone just takes offense....... be my guest, object to what I say, take offense just don't try to make me wear your feelings..... I speak politely enough if you don't like what I say then put a counter point. Huffin n puffin makes me smile.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

And he is right - 'sometimes'

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

I never apologise as I’m never wrong

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"I never apologise as I’m never wrong

^ He's one of my patients at delusional class......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I generally feel the need to apologise for existing. The sense of being unwanted is so deeply conditioned into me that it will be there for life. I'm getting better at putting on a confident front though.

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

Hardly ever.

No need to apologise unless I stand on your foot or something.

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By *ornyhappyCouple
over a year ago

perth

In my opinion the word sorry carries a huge weight, it's an important word and as such should be used as such and when it is used it should be from the heart.

Ps. Using the word sorry instead of excuse me rankles me, but then I'm old and grumpy..M.

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

Not really sorry just do not to look like a dick.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I generally feel the need to apologise for existing. The sense of being unwanted is so deeply conditioned into me that it will be there for life. I'm getting better at putting on a confident front though. "

I’m so sorry

. I started with a small step. I practiced at bit apologising for taking up space, for example, in a shop. I have every right to be in there, and I don’t need to say sorry for my presence? It started there and I built from it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That makes me feel really sad, that you hve such an ingrained belief system, which I'm thinking is not yours but instilled through others, I say that as I've had the same but challenged them and changed them....I want to say you have as much right to existence as the next, don't let anyone especially yourself tell you that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When at work apologize when our customer service is at fault which in coming days will be quite a bit customers and members of the public deserve treating with respect even when they wrong

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