FabSwingers.com forum: Chef, cleaner, butler...?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You’ve won the lottery, and you can have one person. Which would you choose?

I hate cooking, and it is not one of my talents, so I’ll take chef!

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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

Chef every time! I hate cooking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cleaner!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cleaner! I love cooking and I don't like the fussing around

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Housekeeper.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Housekeeper.

That’s cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh I love cooking and don’t mind cleaning either I’d take the butler then

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Housekeeper.

That’s cheating

Yes, and your point is???

And....

Their partner can be the chauffeur. (Now that's cheating).

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

A Talented Chef. No good if he is mediocre, I want flair

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

A chef for me definitely.

My cooking skills are.....shall we say, ‘wanting’.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hands down chef!!

Her x

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

Odd job man, I've got loads of bits and bobs to do in the house. Failing that a cleaner my two boys are like Tasmanian devils

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Butler please.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

Butler bacause they can do all three.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

My Butler is a lazy sod. He's like the one from 'Plebs'.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A Talented Chef. No good if he is mediocre, I want flair

Me too, and if he’s sexy too, well .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cleaner please, when can you start?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A chef for us most definitely.

Her x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Cleaner please, when can you start?"

Pfft, very funny, I don’t even like doing my own

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

I love cooking so would choose someone to clean up the mess I make

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cleaner.

I absolutely love cooking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn’t a butler do everything ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Deffo cleaner

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

I’ll take the cleaner please. Can always find something for a cleaner to do and I may need to odd dusting too!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I’ll take the cleaner please. Can always find something for a cleaner to do and I may need to odd dusting too!

Feather duster at the ready.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Butler, no contest. Restaurants and cleaning services aplenty but a good butler is a gem. Someone who anticipates your needs and arranged everything in advance, etc. Priceless.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A cleaner for me please, I enjoy cooking and will spend hours in the kitchen, the cleaner can do the rest of the house, the kitchen is mine !

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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago

shropshire

"You’ve won the lottery, and you can have one person. Which would you choose?

I hate cooking, and it is not one of my talents, so I’ll take chef!"

Chef...healthy eating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ? "

Does a butler do anything?

Serve food?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cleaner no question with two messy teenagers!!

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Cleaner without a shadow of a doubt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do they polish the balls too

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Cleaner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cleaner please, when can you start?

Pfft, very funny, I don’t even like doing my own

Awwww

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ? "

No, he arranges everything and the staff. He is not normally expected to clean, cook or drive.

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By *hortarseWoman
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A Talented Chef. No good if he is mediocre, I want flair

What meals would you like?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cleaner!!

I enjoy cooking and couldn’t be doing with the permanent presence of a butler being around; I need my privacy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A chef definitely!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Cleaner!!

I enjoy cooking and couldn’t be doing with the permanent presence of a butler being around; I need my privacy

So how many days a week do you want me?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I am a chef, i would have to opt for a cleaner

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By *rivateparts!Man
over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!

A cleaner who can also cook

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By *hortarseWoman
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

What size would you like blue underwear sir

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

What size would you like blue underwear sir

Your size, silly. Preferably with you wearing it.

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By *rivateparts!Man
over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

What size would you like blue underwear sir

Preferably on the floor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What about trainned pastry chef and chef ahahah or is it too much calories

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ?

No, he arranges everything and the staff. He is not normally expected to clean, cook or drive."

Thanks

. I wasn’t sure, I’m still taking the chef, a cleaner comes in a close second l.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is there a Naked Waiter option?

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Is there a Naked Waiter option? "

My fat hairy arse may put you off your food.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You’ve won the lottery, and you can have one person. Which would you choose?

I hate cooking, and it is not one of my talents, so I’ll take chef!"

Cleaner

If i won the lottery I could just order food from like postmates or Uber everyday anyway so wouldnt need a chef

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

Naked female Cleaner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cleaner!!

I enjoy cooking and couldn’t be doing with the permanent presence of a butler being around; I need my privacy

So how many days a week do you want me?

Twice would suffice

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By *hortarseWoman
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

What size would you like blue underwear sir

Your size, silly. Preferably with you wearing it.

Sorry sir I'm here to do your jobs for you not pleasure you

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

What size would you like blue underwear sir

Your size, silly. Preferably with you wearing it.

Sorry sir I'm here to do your jobs for you not pleasure you

Spoil sport.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Cleaner!!

I enjoy cooking and couldn’t be doing with the permanent presence of a butler being around; I need my privacy

So how many days a week do you want me?

Twice would suffice

Taxi to Worcester please.

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By *hortarseWoman
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

What size would you like blue underwear sir

Your size, silly. Preferably with you wearing it.

Sorry sir I'm here to do your jobs for you not pleasure you

Spoil sport.

That's my job

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Housekeeper.

Housekeeper at your service

Get that lovely arse here then. Don't forget the blue underwear.

What size would you like blue underwear sir

Your size, silly. Preferably with you wearing it.

Sorry sir I'm here to do your jobs for you not pleasure you

Spoil sport.

That's my job

But the blue underwear would be the preferred uniform in my house.

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Is there a Naked Waiter option? "

I can serve you Peaches naked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It depends- does the chef clean down after themselves or use every pan and leave a shit tip?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It depends- does the chef clean down after themselves or use every pan and leave a shit tip?"

A chef cleans up always. When I was in kitchens I would never have left anything dirty or I would have been fired.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It depends- does the chef clean down after themselves or use every pan and leave a shit tip?

A chef cleans up always. When I was in kitchens I would never have left anything dirty or I would have been fired. "

Fuck me that's a dry boring answer.

I'm sorry loungers

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"It depends- does the chef clean down after themselves or use every pan and leave a shit tip?

A chef cleans up always. When I was in kitchens I would never have left anything dirty or I would have been fired.

Fuck me that's a dry boring answer.

I'm sorry loungers"

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Deffo cleaner x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I can’t have all 3 I’ve clearly not won enough

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ?

No, he arranges everything and the staff. He is not normally expected to clean, cook or drive.

Thanks

. I wasn’t sure, I’m still taking the chef, a cleaner comes in a close second l."

You’re missing out my dear. A butler is there when you need him but is discreet when he is not required. He’ll arrange a chef to prepare your meal to your specification, which he would already have taken note of, cleaning will be magically done without your even having noticed that anything needed cleaning. Your car will alway be fuelled and polished to within an inch of it life. Your travel arrangements, theatre tickets etc will be taken care of....a well connected butler would be a godsend to someone who just wants to live life without needing to think about how, when, what, where, who.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a Naked Waiter option?

My fat hairy arse may put you off your food.

I wouldn't be looking at your arse if you were stood next to me holding my drink on a tray!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If I can’t have all 3 I’ve clearly not won enough

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a Naked Waiter option?

I can serve you Peaches naked

Make it chocolates and you have a deal

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Is there a Naked Waiter option?

My fat hairy arse may put you off your food.

I wouldn't be looking at your arse if you were stood next to me holding my drink on a tray! "

Smooth talker.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ?

No, he arranges everything and the staff. He is not normally expected to clean, cook or drive.

Thanks

. I wasn’t sure, I’m still taking the chef, a cleaner comes in a close second l.

Oh, I need one of these in my life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ?

No, he arranges everything and the staff. He is not normally expected to clean, cook or drive.

Thanks

. I wasn’t sure, I’m still taking the chef, a cleaner comes in a close second l.

Oh, I need one of these in my life

Indeed you do, in Tuscany perhaps.

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Is there a Naked Waiter option?

I can serve you Peaches naked

Make it chocolates and you have a deal

I'll just pop to the shop and get some now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a Naked Waiter option?

I can serve you Peaches naked

Make it chocolates and you have a deal

I'll just pop to the shop and get some now

Your such a good McNugget

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

[Removed by poster at 08/04/21 13:36:45]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ?

No, he arranges everything and the staff. He is not normally expected to clean, cook or drive.

Thanks

. I wasn’t sure, I’m still taking the chef, a cleaner comes in a close second l.

Ok, I’m changing my answer

. Applications within

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Is there a Naked Waiter option?

I can serve you Peaches naked

Make it chocolates and you have a deal

I'll just pop to the shop and get some now

Your such a good McNugget

Except I'm not Chicken

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Cleaner, my partner is a food cook so that's covered.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn’t a butler do everything ?

No, he arranges everything and the staff. He is not normally expected to clean, cook or drive.

Thanks

. I wasn’t sure, I’m still taking the chef, a cleaner comes in a close second l.

Ok, I’m changing my answer

. Applications within

There you go. You’ll never be able to live without one again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Female cleaner.

All apply when u want hehehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there a Naked Waiter option? "

The apprentice is

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

Chef for vegan based lactose free tasty meals that make me feel like I’ve indulged but haven’t

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By *evil-AngelWoman
over a year ago

...

"Oh I love cooking and don’t mind cleaning either I’d take the butler then

I'll just take you then

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