FabSwingers.com forum: I'm so high and happy

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm so high and happy Mama" - Max (2) after climbing to the top of his slide!

What funny things have your kids said??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's adorable.

My partner was carrying our little girl this morning on our walk and she turned around and said "this is really hard work daddy!" she doesn't realise how easy she's got it sometimes.

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By *evil-AngelWoman
over a year ago

...

My youngest told me she had been helping my mother with her picture Lego. It took me a minute to realise she meant a jigsaw

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

My son on the walk back from nursery shouted "litter-bugger" at the child in front for dropping a crisp packet.

When he was 3 he was I could hear "up in the skyyyyyy" coming from my sons mouth as he went into the garden.

My English bull terrier had a habit of pulling the stuffing out of his bedding and at that time I'd put an old duvet in the garden as a picnic blanket. He'd pulled all the filling out and there were clumps of it all over the grass.

My son was throwing the clumps up. I went in the garden and he was panicked that the clouds had fallen down and he was trying to put them back

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

My lad when small on the bus.

Pregnant woman gets on

"Mum why's that woman so fat?"

My wife

"She's not fat sweetheart, she's pregnant she has a little baby in her tummy"

Literally moments later a guy gets on the bus with a huge beer belly.

In a very loud voice my lad day's

"Mum is that man preg.. preg..(can't say it properly) does he have a baby in his tummy too,is that why he's so fat?"

Whole bus cracks up.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

8 year old: Nan, you're not fat, you're just tall.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For 2 days last week me and my boyfriend ran 82 miles within 41 hours. My kids (24 & 13) came out twice on a bike and electric scooter.

My 24 year old had the audacity to complain that her standing leg from being on an electric scooter was aching her....

Her x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My son on the walk back from nursery shouted "litter-bugger" at the child in front for dropping a crisp packet.

When he was 3 he was I could hear "up in the skyyyyyy" coming from my sons mouth as he went into the garden.

My son was throwing the clumps up. I went in the garden and he was panicked that the clouds had fallen down and he was trying to put them back "

Haha that is hilarious! I hate a litter bugger

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

My mum was taking out the washing once and she has a mustard wrap around dress. As she was doing this my little sister asked 'mummy, what is that?', before my mum could answer she followed on with 'oh, it's your dress. I thought it was a tent'

Pretty sure my mum started a diet that day

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"8 year old: Nan, you're not fat, you're just tall.

Oh my nephew said to my mum once 'you're not old nan, your comfy like a sofa'

Pretty sure my mum went on a diet that day

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I remember when we got on a bus when my son was really little. He said "mummy that man's got jam on his face. I hadn't got a fucking clue what he was on about and sat down. Once I'd got settled on the bus I noticed a chap with a large strawberry birthmark.

I didn't know how to handle it coz I was not only embarrassed but shocked too. I didn't know if the man had heard, had understood what my son had said or what. I just said to my son "I'll tell you all about it when we get home" and I did. I showed him pictures off the Internet with all different birthmarks, I showed him mine on my leg too.

At that point I had no idea if the gent wanted an apology, to watch me squirm or to do nothing more to draw attention to it and him.

It was a really awkward situation. Was I a bad parent? I know I wasn't the best but all parents are learning all the time and being faced with first times and have no clue how to handle it there and then, especially when you don't know how the other person is gonna react

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My little one turned to me yesterday and said 'mummy, I just want to hang out with you'

He didn't, he was just trying to get food out of me haha

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

My mother had a black and white dress on ready to go out one night and my 4 year old sister said "you look beautiful mummy....just like a zebra"

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

At the start of the Hercules Disney cartoon there's 4 women.

3 are slim and tall and the other is the opposite.

My son about 3 pointed to the short fat one and said "mummy that's you" and was chuffed to bits that I was in cartoon form on the telly.

Inside I was quite hurt, but in truth, it looked like me. I was really overweight at the time and I'm a real short arse.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"At the start of the Hercules Disney cartoon there's 4 women.

3 are slim and tall and the other is the opposite.

My son about 3 pointed to the short fat one and said "mummy that's you" and was chuffed to bits that I was in cartoon form on the telly.

Inside I was quite hurt, but in truth, it looked like me. I was really overweight at the time and I'm a real short arse."

The Muses! They have the best songs in Hercules (probably any Disney movie ever).

Children have a way of being very blunt.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"At the start of the Hercules Disney cartoon there's 4 women.

3 are slim and tall and the other is the opposite.

My son about 3 pointed to the short fat one and said "mummy that's you" and was chuffed to bits that I was in cartoon form on the telly.

Inside I was quite hurt, but in truth, it looked like me. I was really overweight at the time and I'm a real short arse.

The Muses! They have the best songs in Hercules (probably any Disney movie ever).

Children have a way of being very blunt."

They do!

Sometimes it's not so straightforward, it's cryptic as fuck and can take ages to work out what they're on about and it's only when they say it a few times in different circumstances that you can make the connection between what they see and what they say. OK, what's the common denominator here? Ohhhhh THAT'S what they're describing in their limited language and experience!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My son, primary school age.. walking from school, prancing in front of me.. turns around out of the blue.. stops and measures me head to toe then sticks thumbs up and says: Mum you are 40, but you actually look..emmm ..30! And ran off leaving me laughing.

Maybe he thought I was having a bad day and needed a nonsense joke to cheer me up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My daughter when she was around 4 or 5 used to get excited about lights of the car flashing when unlocked.. she used to clap and say Awww our car loves us! - Why do you think so? - Because it always winks at us with lights.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Then there was the Noddy phase

On at wake up time before school. Every flaming morning all I could hear "make way for Noddy, NODDY!" as he was singing along.

On the way back we had to walk through a green, a teen on a scrambler bike decided it would be a good idea to start racing around while a class full of reception age children were walking across.

My lad, oh it had to be mine didn't it....

Hand in the air like a copper, lunch box aloft yells at the kid "STOP IN THE NAME OF PLOD"

and didn't understand why the lad didn't stop and do the right thing.

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"At the start of the Hercules Disney cartoon there's 4 women.

3 are slim and tall and the other is the opposite.

My son about 3 pointed to the short fat one and said "mummy that's you" and was chuffed to bits that I was in cartoon form on the telly.

Inside I was quite hurt, but in truth, it looked like me. I was really overweight at the time and I'm a real short arse."

Well you’ve really turned that around. Well done you.

My son at 20 - we were driving and listening to Bob Marley. I said “That guy was one of the coolest black men to ever live”. My son looked at me puzzled. “What? Bob Marley isn’t black!” Clearly a debate follows and it turns out the only picture he had seen of BM was the reversed out silhouette of him in white. I will never let him live it down.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""I'm so high and happy Mama" - Max (2) after climbing to the top of his slide!

What funny things have your kids said??

Ummm my son was at uni and I had a very similar phone call

- he was too funny and cute for me to be angry about the ... erm ... reason he was happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When one of my children was younger in a buggy we used to do the school run with his big brother walking past a certain garden that was always untidy he used to say messy mess at the top of his voice as we went past it. He was 2

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""I'm so high and happy Mama" - Max (2) after climbing to the top of his slide!

What funny things have your kids said??

Ummm my son was at uni and I had a very similar phone call

- he was too funny and cute for me to be angry about the ... erm ... reason he was happy

Haha that is gas

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