FabSwingers.com forum: Are pheasants the stupidest creatures ever?

By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

These fuckers have death wish.

They can fly yet choose to walk in the middle of the road and when you slow down do they fly away?

No they run along side the road or into it.

Some of the country roads around Hampshire look like a scene from a zombie film bodies everywhere.

Idiots

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" These fuckers have death wish.

They can fly yet choose to walk in the middle of the road and when you slow down do they fly away?

No they run along side the road or into it.

Some of the country roads around Hampshire look like a scene from a zombie film bodies everywhere.

Idiots"

We were only having this discussion at weekend

The roads round here are covered in (bits of) 'em

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove

They have this notion that they own the road

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe but bloody tasty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They so are! They lay their eggs on the ground and walk away!

Though must say pheasant egg omelet is rather nice

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes

I often wonder just how much of a challenge it is to shoot one at one of these hunting do's. Bet you could walk up to one and throttle it.

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By *ilverjagMan
over a year ago

swansea

Think I need a road trip to Hampshire. Every time I see one lying in the road, I stop and pick it up, hang it in garage for four days, then pluck it, and in the freezer with it. Delicious brazed and served with red current jelly, or in a game pie. We don't see that many round here though.

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By *lappyMan
over a year ago

Manchester

what about lemmings ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have hundreds in the fields around us and yes, very stupid creatures.

I’ve accidentally hit a few in my car, regularly see dead’s ones on the road and there is every other week people in the fields shooting them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They have this notion that they own the road

They do though. Last summer I was driving along a single track road and a car coming the other way stopped to warn us about an aggressive pheasant! Sure enough, this thing suddenly appeared one the other side of the other car, madly attacking the windows. We drove on and the bugger came after us. I had this comical view of this crazy bird in my door mirror trying to catch us. I suddenly realised my window was still down so put that up quick, but it was hilarious. He even looked the part, with a bandit mask appearance. I looked it up as a Reeves Pheasant. Ballsy little sod.

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

Poor Pheasants

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thousands are released by the shooting estates every year. They have been raised in pens, have no idea what the wild is let alone a road or a car.

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove

"Poor Pheasants

I have to slam by brakes on for a good part of my journey to work in a morning. Damn rabbits and pheasants strolling about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Poor Pheasants

They are being killed in droves on the road right now, because a lot of game shoots put down their usual number of birds, but the shoots were cancelled, so there are all these 'surplus' birds wandering about. I saw get 3 hit in a 9 mile stretch yesterday, and a good few others already down. Of course the shoots are no longer feeding them either.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

No.

Kakapo

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"No.

Kakapo"

But they are adorably cute though

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"No.

Kakapo

But they are adorably cute though

Stupidest birds alive

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"No.

Kakapo

But they are adorably cute though

Stupidest birds alive

You havent met my ex then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They have this notion that they own the road

That's why they all own BMW's

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"No.

Kakapo

But they are adorably cute though

Stupidest birds alive

You havent met my ex then

Oh you bitch!!

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove

"They have this notion that they own the road

That's why they all own BMW's"

I don't understand

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They are clever enough to wait until the very last second to squawk out from a hedge when you are on a horse, so you end up on your arse on the floor and the horse turns at speed and bogs off.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

We have one near me that we've called Brian. Brian makes the most awful call at stupid o'clock in the morning. I hate Brian.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.

Kakapo

But they are adorably cute though

Stupidest birds alive

You havent met my ex then

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"No.

Kakapo

But they are adorably cute though

Stupidest birds alive

You havent met my ex then

Oh you bitch!!

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Pheasants are indeed mightily stupid birds but the absolute stupidest bird of all has got to be Guineafowls.

They seem to be born without brains.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" These fuckers have death wish.

They can fly yet choose to walk in the middle of the road and when you slow down do they fly away?

No they run along side the road or into it.

Some of the country roads around Hampshire look like a scene from a zombie film bodies everywhere.

Idiots"

They are what they are. I'd put humans up there with your question OP. Pick an animal dumb or Clever. That kills their own based on skin colour and faith beliefs. Destroys their own living quarters to replace it with stuff. Or for that matter has no sense of their world. The beautiful crazy cute dangerous furry friends we share this blue Planet with have no sense of destruction. Just living. And good for them.

However....Dogs. I love them. But sniffing their own ass!!!. What's that all about

Peace folks...John Lennon said it right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can confirm they are the stupidest ever.

I drove trains on the west of England line for 15 years, 100miles of single line track through rural Wiltshire, Dorset, Somerset and Devon and on an average trip in the summer you would hit at least 3 or 4 pheasants each time.

It was horrid and it took me ages to realise that trying to scare a flock of them off the track by blown the whistle only stunned them into freezing where they were. Like if they didn’t move they couldn’t be hurt by 150 tonnes of metal barrelling down on them. Turned out to be better to not do anything and just hope they moved.

Creates a lot of other wildlife along the track as they fed off what was left so circle of life and everything, plus I figured every one I got with the train was one less that was shot by someone having fun by killing them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pheasants are indeed mightily stupid birds but the absolute stupidest bird of all has got to be Guineafowls.

They seem to be born without brains."

Oh yes! Totally agree!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.

Kakapo

But they are adorably cute though

Not when they go through your front grille at 50mph they aren't..

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Yup, counted at least ten on the way to work today and a near miss with a few this evening

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Ten dead I should say

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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

All I know is they are delicious

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" These fuckers have death wish.

They can fly yet choose to walk in the middle of the road and when you slow down do they fly away?

No they run along side the road or into it.

Some of the country roads around Hampshire look like a scene from a zombie film bodies everywhere.

Idiots"

In Spring the tarmac is often warmer thsn the ground so they move onto the road.

Flashing your lights is more effective than using your horn because they pick up on it better.

Sheep are more suicidal than pheasants!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" These fuckers have death wish.

They can fly yet choose to walk in the middle of the road and when you slow down do they fly away?

No they run along side the road or into it.

Some of the country roads around Hampshire look like a scene from a zombie film bodies everywhere.

Idiots"

I’ve almost mown down countless numbers of them. I was told that their beaks are quite sharp, so you have to watch out or you could burst a tyre.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" These fuckers have death wish.

They can fly yet choose to walk in the middle of the road and when you slow down do they fly away?

No they run along side the road or into it.

Some of the country roads around Hampshire look like a scene from a zombie film bodies everywhere.

Idiots"

100% they are the stupidest animals ever. We have one male on our lane that just waddles down the lane in front of me when I’m driving to get to work. Just ambles along with no sense of urgency at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s the breeding by shoots that’s rendered them unable to look after themselves. Without game keepers looking after them they’d likely die out now due to their stupidity when it comes to laying eggs.

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By *ireman28Man
over a year ago

Derbyshire Nottinghamshire

Stupidist creatures? Those arseholes in the Co-op who refuse to wear a mask!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stupid, but taste so good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stupidist creatures? Those arseholes in the Co-op who refuse to wear a mask!"

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By *tarburst babydollMan
over a year ago

Dingwall

"I often wonder just how much of a challenge it is to shoot one at one of these hunting do's. Bet you could walk up to one and throttle it."

Hubby used to catch them with a fishing rod using sultanas as bait

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They sit on the track in front of the 2000 ton train I ride on in the morning.

They are as stupid as stupid can be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a video of one attacking itself in a mirror haha.

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"We have one near me that we've called Brian. Brian makes the most awful call at stupid o'clock in the morning. I hate Brian. "

You can’t say that. He’s the messiah!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have one near me that we've called Brian. Brian makes the most awful call at stupid o'clock in the morning. I hate Brian.

You can’t say that. He’s the messiah!!!"

He’s been a very naughty boy

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By *rivateparts!Man
over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!

I read the title as peasants, I'll get my coat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your not wrong op I drove around the Lanes in the Lake District And all I kept thinking was - do I have enough room in my freezer?

Insects are dumb, flies that constantly hit the lampshade, and those wasps that can get into your canned drink, “try and get out, biatch”

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Being raised by humans they have no fear of them yet

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By *tefe-MartyCouple
over a year ago

Cambs

This makes me very sad

Have a chocolate Lab that is constantly out smarted by pheasants

Not sure what that says about him, but i still love him lol

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By *roticusCouple
over a year ago

Porthmadog

One bastard pheasant flew into the passenger side wing mirror and took it off my car, cost me £120 to replace it.

It tasted pretty good though.

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By *ohn.1960Man
over a year ago

Southampton

Yep jools..i live in new forest..100s of them with death wishes..esp near Beaulieu

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

They're probably the Road runner X Pheasant hybrids

"Beep, beep"

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"One bastard pheasant flew into the passenger side wing mirror and took it off my car, cost me £120 to replace it.

It tasted pretty good though."

The wing mirror?!

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"I often wonder just how much of a challenge it is to shoot one at one of these hunting do's. Bet you could walk up to one and throttle it.

Hubby used to catch them with a fishing rod using sultanas as bait"

I might give sultanas a go as bait, I've fished for years and never caught a pheasant

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"One bastard pheasant flew into the passenger side wing mirror and took it off my car, cost me £120 to replace it.

It tasted pretty good though.

The wing mirror?! "

Probably a 'Carbon' ara mirror

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By *ausageNmashCouple
over a year ago

Andover

Yes...have loads where I work and instead of jumping out the way off my van they just run on ahead in my direction like roadrunner

( male here )

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

They are stupid.

I used to live near a shoot - had pheasants dropping on my car bonnet on a Sunday morning

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By *artin69erMan
over a year ago

Warwick

Maybe they are reincarnated cyclists. That would explain a lot.

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By *r and mrs 1992Couple
over a year ago

Oldham

"No.

Kakapo

But they are adorably cute though

Not when they go through your front grille at 50mph they aren't.."

Actually had that happen it went straight through the Mercedes badge on the van

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I assume it's because you can only shoot a flying pheasant....... anything else just isn't good form old boy.

So....... the ones that like flying don't pass on their Genes and the ones that walk too much DO.

So............ we are witnessing evolution in action ......

The flying ones were the ones with the brains and used to do the crosswords.

The walking ones are the ones with NO brains and search for fag ends.

Everyone should 'rescue' newly hatched pheasants and force them into Gulags where they are taught the Green Cross Code......

Sorted !

Next !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess they cant read the Highway Code

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

That what makes them interesting prey to hunt, a lot of falconers love the fact that the bird doesn't move toll the last minute.

If a hawk catches them like this, then the hawk is worth its weight in gold.

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Yes

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

I've always thought that it's because pheasants are bred in captivity that they have no skills for living in the wild.

They probably associate the sound of motor vehicles with the bringing of food so are drawn to roads and traffic.

I don't see pheasant shooting as fair game, killing a creature that doesn't have the skills to protect its self hardly makes anyone a skilled hunter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've always thought that it's because pheasants are bred in captivity that they have no skills for living in the wild.

They probably associate the sound of motor vehicles with the bringing of food so are drawn to roads and traffic.

I don't see pheasant shooting as fair game, killing a creature that doesn't have the skills to protect its self hardly makes anyone a skilled hunter."

That's sad.

Most behave like pheasants brought up in captivity.

Gormless and clueless standing in the middle of the supermarket aisle with their giant trollies so no one can get past.

Maybe they could be shot instead

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By *renzMan
over a year ago

Between Chichester and Havant

It's good to see this thread is populated by people that know what they are talking about!

Aside from the stupidness.

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By *obajxMan
over a year ago

Cheshire

"They have this notion that they own the road

Your post reminds me of this video

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6_BGKyAKigs&feature=youtu.be

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall

Yes, they are very stupid. They need shooting!

Oops, sorry, wrong thread!

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I've always thought that it's because pheasants are bred in captivity that they have no skills for living in the wild.

They probably associate the sound of motor vehicles with the bringing of food so are drawn to roads and traffic.

I don't see pheasant shooting as fair game, killing a creature that doesn't have the skills to protect its self hardly makes anyone a skilled hunter."

Pheasants are bred in captivity ? All of them ?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

This is my FACT of the day.....

I checked it out ..... well well well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They're not all reared in captivity - that's really only for the restaurant and supermarket trade.

You do have large sporting estates that will breed pheasants fairly intensively and then sell on the eggs and hatchlings/chicks to other shooting estates who will then raise them in a semi-wild environment in time for the season (feed pens will be in various woodland to encourage them to remain in the area), but this is normally used to supplement an existing population.

This year's been tricky, without the shoots they've been allowed to run rampant; they're really successful breeders and will feed voraciously.

They're ground nesting birds and are effectively wild chickens (and chickens are really stupid) - like chickens, the ground is where they're happier. If they don't need to fly then they won't.

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By *an4funMan
over a year ago

london

One ran out in front of me kamikaze style whilst I was driving. It was too late to stop without causing a serious accident. I felt the thud under me and saw a plume of feathers landing behind me in my rear view. Silly bugger

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