FabSwingers.com forum: So much

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hate going on in the forums atm, it is like a battlefield.

In a time like this you would think we would be more considerate of others who may be having private battles but no, it is the opposite.

Truly sad to see.

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By *layful Couple For YouCouple
over a year ago

Lust

This is why we never tend to comment on the more ‘serious’ threads. Some people seem to find offence in any viewpoint that is different from there own and even go out of their way to take offence at some comments that were obviously lighthearted attempts at brevity.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is why we never tend to comment on the more ‘serious’ threads. Some people seem to find offence in any viewpoint that is different from there own and even go out of their way to take offence at some comments that were obviously lighthearted attempts at brevity."

You will always get people disagree, that has always been the case, but lately there is just arguing for the sake of arguing and alot of "trolls" who are negative on every thread for the sake of a response

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not that I have seen

But I have sed it before I float around in my own little world very disconted from the reality off normal people

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not that I have seen

But I have sed it before I float around in my own little world very disconted from the reality off normal people "

I cant elaborate as such because rules, but it has definitely been like walking into a minefield

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not that I have seen

But I have sed it before I float around in my own little world very disconted from the reality off normal people

I cant elaborate as such because rules, but it has definitely been like walking into a minefield "

It can be at time I just try hard not to offend meny people

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not that I have seen

But I have sed it before I float around in my own little world very disconted from the reality off normal people

I cant elaborate as such because rules, but it has definitely been like walking into a minefield

It can be at time I just try hard not to offend meny people "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually love taking part in the forums but in the last couple of weeks I’ve contemplated coming off them due to this exact reason.

It feels at times that people are going out of their way to be as rude and as unpleasant as possible.

You need a thick skin on here but I’ve seen new users being torn apart and it’s not necessary and it’s usually by the same people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think a lot of people are struggling at the moment, and are just using any place to vent it out. Just ignore and move on, if they have an issue, it’s their problem. Love to all ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s always been a few like that on here. Atm I feel that people are hyper sensitive so lash out, sometimes unintentionally sometimes not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There’s always been a few like that on here. Atm I feel that people are hyper sensitive so lash out, sometimes unintentionally sometimes not

You could be right there...

I just come,say something silly and leave...

I know,doesn't say anything good about me either.

But who cares?...

I just love giggles...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hate going on in the forums atm, it is like a battlefield.

In a time like this you would think we would be more considerate of others who may be having private battles but no, it is the opposite.

Truly sad to see."

Agree Ivy, I’ve been staying away for a few weeks as they’re just not fun to read most of the time.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hate going on in the forums atm, it is like a battlefield.

In a time like this you would think we would be more considerate of others who may be having private battles but no, it is the opposite.

Truly sad to see.

Agree Ivy, I’ve been staying away for a few weeks as they’re just not fun to read most of the time. "

I considered it tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s no more or less than it always is, it usually dependant on your own state of mind and what threads you contribute in, whether you notice or not. I’ve learnt that the type of threads that usually wind me up I stay away from, I can’t be bothered to waste energy on them, pigeon chess is completely futile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/02/21 07:57:31]

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By *an4funMan
over a year ago

london

I'd find it very boring if everyone just said nice things and agreed with eachother. I don't mean being nasty is a good thing btw.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"It’s no more or less than it always is, it usually dependant on your own state of mind and what threads you contribute in, whether you notice or not. I’ve learnt that the type of threads that usually wind me up I stay away from, I can’t be bothered to waste energy on them, pigeon chess is completely futile. "

This I agree with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think most people have cabin fever and no outlet... so the defensive, thoughtlessness and niggling tetchiness is magnified

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There’s always been an element of this though I seem to have noticed more of it since I took a break in nov. I think maybe it’s more reflective of me though and my tolerance after changes in my life. So I stay away from thread which are too serious or the comments get argumentative and post on more of the light hearted ones

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Though he himself did not eat the sausages, Zwingli was quick to defend Froschauer from allegations of heresy. In a sermon titled Von Erkiesen und Freiheit der Speisen (Regarding the Choice and Freedom of Foods), Zwingli argued that fasting should be entirely voluntary, not mandatory

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Guessing people need to vent.

Easier to pick an argument with a total stranger who means nothing to you and not in face.

Besides a large amount of people aren't seeing anyone.

I don't take comments aimed at me personally as they don't really know me.

Just grow a thick skin and learn that everyone else is wrong all will be good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It never bothers me, you have a choice to be part of the drama or not, not hard to avoid it.

It is the crap that is spread behind the scenes which is far more dangerous and damaging because lies are told which others believe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately, there are alot of unkind people.

Thankfully the vast majority are lovely, they just tend to be quieter

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Some people will pick an argument out of anything and will ask continuous questions to try and aggravate and get someone to fire up.

We avoid any conflict. It's just not worth it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Some people will pick an argument out of anything and will ask continuous questions to try and aggravate and get someone to fire up.

We avoid any conflict. It's just not worth it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My post was not about the usual disagreements, more the influx of trolls.

I have also come across racism and transphobic comments in the past 2 weeks

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By *luebellRacerCouple
over a year ago

Shropshire

I've been less active.

I'll keep being me, but I just CBA with the drama at the moment.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Whilst I don't disagree it goes on, and have seen it in the last few days on certain threads (the MLS related ones being a good example - that got unnecessarily out of hand), I've actually thought in the last week or so there has been an upturn about the place with more positivity and inclusivity - and think that's largely been due to a "changing of the guard".

You'll always get people who disagree with each other, and those who use the relative anonymity of the internet to either seek to provoke a reaction or be abusive, or worse still stir trouble behind the scenes. Then there are those who are offended for the sake of being offended, usually with those who hold a different, and often valid and rational, opinion to them.

It's the nature of internet forums really and has been since the beginning and not just sex related sites, although I do think the added ingredients of sex can heighten emotions at times.

I mostly ignore that kind of thing these days, although will always offer an opinion if I have one to give and think it's valid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ivy

You seem perfectly lovely, and this post shows how kind and caring you are..people like you are worth a million hateful people.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ivy

You seem perfectly lovely, and this post shows how kind and caring you are..people like you are worth a million hateful people.

Thank you x

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By *all me FlikWoman
over a year ago

Galaxy Far Far Away

Open forums are for discussion, debate or just to have some fun so I agree with Ivy, there's no need for nasty comments or pot stirring. This is a swingers site after all so surely we would gravitate towards the nicer people for when life becomes more normal...just a thought.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

I’m with you OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What GeminiMan said ^

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

I think it's always been a bit like that Ivy, it's usually why you won't find me in the serious threads because that's not what I'm in here for

I do imagine that there are a lot of people, with a lot more time on their hands to be outraged at the moment though

LvM

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

I think it's good to see people's true colours, surely it's a great red flag and I hope they've lost meets because of their posts and comments

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Trolls - I see this word a lot. I see people misuse it too or at least use it with different definitions.

Trolling involves posting something to get a reaction. Saying something to get attention and then sticking around to see who agrees and who doesn't.

Trolling could involve putting down an unsubstantiated claim then watching while others join in and give what is merely opinion 'wings' build it up so that it spreads like 'wild fire' through a community.

Generally negative and generally causing others feelings of discontent where there isn't any.

Offense can be laid down many times by many people but it's the taking up of offense ( usually perceived ) that causes the damage to the individual and then to the community.

I'm not saying that there are no negative people out there. I'm saying twas ever thus. Thomas Hobbes wrote that people will resort to violence for the merest of trifles ( no puddin jokes please ) and that was in 1651 !

It takes more than the troll to cause offense. Offense requires the reader or listener to believe they have been harmed in some way. They have to accept that harm and allow it to change how they feel.

'Free your mind - the rest will follow' ..... Aristotle! no twas En Vogue

Negative comment + Negative comment doesn't = positive comment.

So ... am I now in the 'hateful people' compartment ?

The 'truly lovely box ?'

How would you know ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It never bothers me, you have a choice to be part of the drama or not, not hard to avoid it.

It is the crap that is spread behind the scenes which is far more dangerous and damaging because lies are told which others believe"

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Hate going on in the forums atm, it is like a battlefield.

In a time like this you would think we would be more considerate of others who may be having private battles but no, it is the opposite.

Truly sad to see."

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I think it's good to see people's true colours, surely it's a great red flag and I hope they've lost meets because of their posts and comments"

I'd agree with that Sam yet if you read above a lot of stirring goes on between so called 'friends' in private messages. I've heard this said over the years. I can't prove it so never challenge it and I just have to assume that most adults using the forum are not the lonely , hateful paranoids that indulge in dissing others due to their own short comings.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What happened on the MLS threads that got out of hand?

I have seen people being nice but they get ignored because they aren't part of a group.

I have seen people being helpful/ caring but being called negative.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

For above comment on trolls

I know what one is.... and meant what I said.

There have been trolls.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Also

Not pulling in particular threads or examples because I didnt start the thread for arguments or to name people.

It was out of exhaustion of it all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think threads calling for people to be nice are a waste of energy. They add to the "them and us" mentality, and rarely seem to achieve what they set out to do.

Someone truly looking for a peaceful life would just steer clear. It is OK to just let stuff go and not comment. If a comment is made intentionally to inflame, why add to it?

Meh. Things will never change. It's all human nature.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I think threads calling for people to be nice are a waste of energy. They add to the "them and us" mentality, and rarely seem to achieve what they set out to do.

Someone truly looking for a peaceful life would just steer clear. It is OK to just let stuff go and not comment. If a comment is made intentionally to inflame, why add to it?

Meh. Things will never change. It's all human nature. "

I was about to give the thumbs up till I saw 'human nature'.......

I need a nearly thumbs up button

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"What happened on the MLS threads that got out of hand?

I have seen people being nice but they get ignored because they aren't part of a group.

I have seen people being helpful/ caring but being called negative.

I didn't know what MLS was so I looked it up ....... Soccer ?

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By *an4funMan
over a year ago

london

What's an MLS?

Who's definition of trolling do we go by? If someone is particularly sensitive and doesn't like or agree with a response to something they have said does that make the other person a troll?

There are forum rules to abide by. If they haven't broken those rules then I don't see an issue. We are all adults here

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"What's an MLS?

Who's definition of trolling do we go by? If someone is particularly sensitive and doesn't like or agree with a response to something they have said does that make the other person a troll?

There are forum rules to abide by. If they haven't broken those rules then I don't see an issue. We are all adults here"

I'm glad you don't know what MLS is. I don't either. I looked it up and it was something league soccer but ...... really .....

soccer ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's an MLS?

Who's definition of trolling do we go by? If someone is particularly sensitive and doesn't like or agree with a response to something they have said does that make the other person a troll?

There are forum rules to abide by. If they haven't broken those rules then I don't see an issue. We are all adults here

I'm glad you don't know what MLS is. I don't either. I looked it up and it was something league soccer but ...... really .....

soccer ?"

Manchester lounge social

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By *an4funMan
over a year ago

london

"What's an MLS?

Who's definition of trolling do we go by? If someone is particularly sensitive and doesn't like or agree with a response to something they have said does that make the other person a troll?

There are forum rules to abide by. If they haven't broken those rules then I don't see an issue. We are all adults here

I'm glad you don't know what MLS is. I don't either. I looked it up and it was something league soccer but ...... really .....

soccer ?"

I suspect it's not a footie thing

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By *an4funMan
over a year ago

london

"What's an MLS?

Who's definition of trolling do we go by? If someone is particularly sensitive and doesn't like or agree with a response to something they have said does that make the other person a troll?

There are forum rules to abide by. If they haven't broken those rules then I don't see an issue. We are all adults here

I'm glad you don't know what MLS is. I don't either. I looked it up and it was something league soccer but ...... really .....

soccer ?

Manchester lounge social "

Heads over to the Manchester lounge social...

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"What's an MLS?

Who's definition of trolling do we go by? If someone is particularly sensitive and doesn't like or agree with a response to something they have said does that make the other person a troll?

There are forum rules to abide by. If they haven't broken those rules then I don't see an issue. We are all adults here

I'm glad you don't know what MLS is. I don't either. I looked it up and it was something league soccer but ...... really .....

soccer ?

Manchester lounge social "

Oh yes...... Thanks x

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Yes thanks but no thanks that is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We need the weekly ‘be kind’ threads to remind us how to behave.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am leaving this post now.

I said what I wanted to say.

Peace out and hugs to those who need it right now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whilst I don't disagree it goes on, and have seen it in the last few days on certain threads (the MLS related ones being a good example - that got unnecessarily out of hand), I've actually thought in the last week or so there has been an upturn about the place with more positivity and inclusivity - and think that's largely been due to a "changing of the guard".

I'm going to virtually circle that in red thick marker. Agreed.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"My post was not about the usual disagreements, more the influx of trolls.

I have also come across racism and transphobic comments in the past 2 weeks"

I've seen racism and transphobia the whole time I've been on here. It's something that has always made me uncomfortable about this site.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"My post was not about the usual disagreements, more the influx of trolls.

I have also come across racism and transphobic comments in the past 2 weeks

I've seen racism and transphobia the whole time I've been on here. It's something that has always made me uncomfortable about this site. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm going to virtually circle that in red thick marker. Agreed.

Lots of really good comments on here but as a relative newbie this has also been my experience, mostly positive and friendly while learning not to post on those threads which go the other way.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Not that I have seen

But I have sed it before I float around in my own little world very disconted from the reality off normal people

I cant elaborate as such because rules, but it has definitely been like walking into a minefield "

If you can't elaborate because of rules then the post itself is probably against rules

If you think a post is breaking rules then the simple thing to do is report it. If you think a person needs reporting , again, report please.

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