FabSwingers.com forum: Ok for women to be curvy but not men?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is the impression I'm getting well looking around on here.

I think it's because body positivity is promoted more towards women than it is towards men.

What do you think?

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I think that attraction and beauty (male and female) are in the eye of the beholder OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think that attraction and beauty (male and female) are in the eye of the beholder OP.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok, but surely that view is influenced by things out in the world, e.g Adele is considered curvy and sexy, but Jack Black not so much

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Go find the dad bod threads.... There's loads.

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Some women will love jack black while others won't, some guys will love Adele while others won't

There's no one size Fits all,

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Ok, but surely that view is influenced by things out in the world, e.g Adele is considered curvy and sexy, but Jack Black not so much"

Personally I find Jack Black sexier than Adele.

Eye of the beholder, my friend....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is the impression I'm getting well looking around on here.

I think it's because body positivity is promoted more towards women than it is towards men.

What do you think?"

It’s not just one sided!

I’m very conscious about my body but I try to not let it stop me doing what I want.

I find muscle bound guys attractive yes, would probably have a romp or three but long term I do like a guy who is stocky!

I think it’s the protection thing, they need to be able to wrap me up in their arms like a little woman per say x

Your build would be absolutely perfect for me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm not a dad so why should I be called a dad bod.... See my point?

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

Personally, positivity and personality are more important than body size.

There's plenty of others who think the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok, but surely that view is influenced by things out in the world, e.g Adele is considered curvy and sexy, but Jack Black not so much"

I find Jack Black incredibly sexy!

In a tux in The Holidays mmmmhmmmmmm

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

No idea if it science or law but I like fit men and I’m fat

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I'm not a dad so why should I be called a dad bod.... See my point?"

I'm not beautiful yet that's what part of bbw means.... What is your point?

You asked if bugger guys were as liked by the women of fab and I told you where to go find them but that's not a good enough answer.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not a dad so why should I be called a dad bod.... See my point?

I'm not beautiful yet that's what part of bbw means.... What is your point?

You asked if bugger guys were as liked by the women of fab and I told you where to go find them but that's not a good enough answer.....

Depends on how you see beauty sweet!

I think you are a beautiful person and I had loads of fun last time we met at MLS!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The term curvy describes a female body shape surely? Meaning boobs, bum and a smaller waist ... not sure how this alludes to a male in reality?

If you're meaning a larger size then I thought the term dadbod covered it because actually having children doesn't change a males body?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I'm not a dad so why should I be called a dad bod.... See my point?

I'm not beautiful yet that's what part of bbw means.... What is your point?

You asked if bugger guys were as liked by the women of fab and I told you where to go find them but that's not a good enough answer.....

Depends on how you see beauty sweet!

I think you are a beautiful person and I had loads of fun last time we met at MLS!

..... I miss socials!

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Ok, but surely that view is influenced by things out in the world, e.g Adele is considered curvy and sexy, but Jack Black not so much"

I adore Jack Black.

Different strokes for different folks.

Plenty of dad bod appreciation threads on hete OP.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Rugby build seems to be used by larger guys as well but I guess those who don't play rugby can't use it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you see what you want to see

I also think that people come here to meet those they find attractive

Like it or not, fitter guys will always be more popular than fatter ones (as a whole)

So, without being dismissive, if you feel your build holds you back, change it - it will make you feel better physically and mentally

However, it won't necessarily get you fucked

I say all these things as a fat guy - who is also old, short, bald and speccy and has also made many friends here

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"Rugby build seems to be used by larger guys as well but I guess those who don't play rugby can't use it

Or built like a brick shithouse?

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

Confidence is key no matter what your shape or size.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one telly you what to be ad you are what you are just be comfortable with who you are and sod the haters

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By *rad670Man
over a year ago

South Lakes

I think we are old enogh and wise enough to not fall into the feeling pressure to be "perfect" whatever is deemed to be perfect. It's nice to feel you are in shape but once over 50 very difficult to compare to when you were in your 20s and 30s. As most folk on here that are interesting are over a certain age I presumed there really is no pressure to be super fit and we all look a bit deeper than that as in experience and maturity, always nice to have that wow factor but not as essential as when we were younger.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I disagree with your whole premis to be fair... Men arnt curvy because curvy is the hour glass shape some women are so not releven to men, women get jumped on all the time for calling themselfs curvy when people argue that there just fat so not sure how you think body positivity is onlh given to women? In saw a post today about how he's mad about the amount of profile that state curvy but really there just fat and I've never seen a post like that about men... Simple fact is tho it doest matter how you describe your self you'll never be for everybody and that's fine because there will always be someone who your perfect for so why worry about labels.

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"This is the impression I'm getting well looking around on here.

I think it's because body positivity is promoted more towards women than it is towards men.

What do you think?"

What does “curvy” even mean for a male body?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see why you feel that way but you'll find that in all aspects of life and not just here on Fab. I don't think anyone should be forced to admire a body type they are not attracted to but there's no need to be so rude about it and you do come across people like that fairly often on here as most are very straight forward about what they want and who they are looking for.

I do agree with you about the body positivity movement and it is definitely aimed more at women rather than men but then again I do think men get more of a free pass and have more privilege and face less abuse than women when they are on the bigger side.

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By *ickawitchCouple
over a year ago

Away with the fairies (Liverpool to you)

"Ok, but surely that view is influenced by things out in the world, e.g Adele is considered curvy and sexy, but Jack Black not so much"

I would do Jack Black in a heartbeat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dude you are dealing with multi million economy of business group there with the question.

I personally could not answer sry

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You've made a good point, because I see the term curvy as feminine, but it's still an affectionate term.

The term dad bod to my understanding is that it's a guy who has a family and takes care of them so doesn't have the time to be a big fitness freak.

So assumed to be a provider and good guy

The issue is that there is no positivity around guys that are cuddly or a bit overweight, like there is for curvy women.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I see why you feel that way but you'll find that in all aspects of life and not just here on Fab. I don't think anyone should be forced to admire a body type they are not attracted to but there's no need to be so rude about it and you do come across people like that fairly often on here as most are very straight forward about what they want and who they are looking for.

Ok, do you think it's more socially ok for men to like curvy woman because of the growing positivity towards it?

I ask because if a woman admitted to liking bigger men it would be met with more negative than positive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've made a good point, because I see the term curvy as feminine, but it's still an affectionate term.

The term dad bod to my understanding is that it's a guy who has a family and takes care of them so doesn't have the time to be a big fitness freak.

So assumed to be a provider and good guy

The issue is that there is no positivity around guys that are cuddly or a bit overweight, like there is for curvy women."

but curvy isn't a term of endearment it's a body shape which can be used to describe people from size 6 to 26 its nothing tk do with size... I guess the equivalent to dad bod for females would be bbw not curvy and dad bod is a term of endearment, I just googled the meaning and it said a body not just built from muscle but also heart a dad bod is seen to reprosent down to earth masculinity so that is body positivity for men... My digest question is why do we have to put labels on anyone... Dad bod curvy athletic bbw are just terms to seperated people and pit groups of people against each other when really who cares... Either your attracted to somone or your not and if your basing that purely on a person's size/shape then maybe you need to work on yourself and not changing the labaling system

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I meant that there is positive consecrations around the term curvy.

I agree on the label thing, but I don't think it's possible for people to not categorise what they like to look at because your influenced by the world around you to pick something that you can be judged on, and how do you get rid of that?

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Ok, but surely that view is influenced by things out in the world, e.g Adele is considered curvy and sexy, but Jack Black not so much"

I can't make myself fancy someone because other people think I should or they deem someone attractive.

I can't make myself lust after someone I don't.

It happens when it happens.

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By *yantico86Man
over a year ago

drumchapel

I'm one of these guys I go for personality over body type if you make me laugh then happy days attraction of mind and personality makes meets ( pre covid) a lot better for me

Hope everyone has a fantastic night x

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By *onkyLemonsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Embrace it, sexy is a attitude not a shape, love your skin and you’ll shine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Turn off social media and be you.

No one is perfect - look around we are all different shapes, sizes and ages.

The poster boy/girl that has an amazing body will always get the most attention- that's life.

I think the reason women promote body positivity is because we are judged by men and women harshly.

Men not so much - but it is there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turn off social media and be you.

No one is perfect - look around we are all different shapes, sizes and ages.

The poster boy/girl that has an amazing body will always get the most attention- that's life.

I think the reason women promote body positivity is because we are judged by men and women harshly.

Men not so much - but it is there.

"
i do think the pressure is more on women... Yes guys dream of 6 packs but in general we can get away with hairy chests, big arms and legs and even the "dad bod" look. But for women the expectation to be skinny is greater... Its a shame cos all shapes and sizes can be attractive.. Its how you carry it with confidence that matters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turn off social media and be you.

No one is perfect - look around we are all different shapes, sizes and ages.

The poster boy/girl that has an amazing body will always get the most attention- that's life.

I think the reason women promote body positivity is because we are judged by men and women harshly.

Men not so much - but it is there.

i do think the pressure is more on women... Yes guys dream of 6 packs but in general we can get away with hairy chests, big arms and legs and even the "dad bod" look. But for women the expectation to be skinny is greater... Its a shame cos all shapes and sizes can be attractive.. Its how you carry it with confidence that matters "

So true.

I'm so glad I'm not in my 20's these days.

Computers weren't a household thing when I was that age

I've never joined in on social media either other than Fab.

It's so bad for mental health to constantly compare yourself to others.

I'm not interested in making comparing myself to a 22yr old Instagram model- how will that help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turn off social media and be you.

No one is perfect - look around we are all different shapes, sizes and ages.

The poster boy/girl that has an amazing body will always get the most attention- that's life.

I think the reason women promote body positivity is because we are judged by men and women harshly.

Men not so much - but it is there.

So true.

I'm so glad I'm not in my 20's these days.

Computers weren't a household thing when I was that age

I've never joined in on social media either other than Fab.

It's so bad for mental health to constantly compare yourself to others.

I'm not interested in making comparing myself to a 22yr old Instagram model- how will that help

"
phone technology and social media must put such pressure on young girls to fit to a certain look. As I guy growing up I went to an all boys rugby playing school and there was no real pressure to be skinny. It was being big, strong, not showing emotions and bottling up feelings (which is another issue for guys) but in general body issues weren't a thing for me. Much more so for women and you are so right.. Once you healthy and comfortable in your own skin its the main thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you either like what you see or you don't. Bollocks to what anyone else thinks.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Ok, but surely that view is influenced by things out in the world, e.g Adele is considered curvy and sexy, but Jack Black not so much

I would do Jack Black in a heartbeat

Absolutely would too!

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Turn off social media and be you.

No one is perfect - look around we are all different shapes, sizes and ages.

The poster boy/girl that has an amazing body will always get the most attention- that's life.

I think the reason women promote body positivity is because we are judged by men and women harshly.

Men not so much - but it is there.

So true.

I'm so glad I'm not in my 20's these days.

Computers weren't a household thing when I was that age

I've never joined in on social media either other than Fab.

It's so bad for mental health to constantly compare yourself to others.

I'm not interested in making comparing myself to a 22yr old Instagram model- how will that help

Honestly, I really don't think I'd be here now if I grew up with all the tech and pressure. It must be so all consuming if you had a parent like mine where you were never good enough and then to have it shoved in your face everywhere else too. Fuck that. A massive fuck that.

I remember in my late teens talking to my mum about a book I'd read called "you have to say I'm pretty you're my mother", I say talking

I tried to talk to her about it (it was about relationships between mothers and daughters oddly enough) and all I got out was the title, she interrupted me and said "I bloody don't, I'm your mother not a liar"

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By *icearmsMan
over a year ago

KIDLINGTON

"Rugby build seems to be used by larger guys as well but I guess those who don't play rugby can't use it

What about if you used to play rugby? Can you use it then? Or will the get done under trade description act?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Rugby build seems to be used by larger guys as well but I guess those who don't play rugby can't use it

What about if you used to play rugby? Can you use it then? Or will the get done under trade description act?

That's OK

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

Ok, do you think it's more socially ok for men to like curvy woman because of the growing positivity towards it?

I ask because if a woman admitted to liking bigger men it would be met with more negative than positive"

I think you're over analysing things!

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By *icearmsMan
over a year ago

KIDLINGTON

"Rugby build seems to be used by larger guys as well but I guess those who don't play rugby can't use it

What about if you used to play rugby? Can you use it then? Or will the get done under trade description act?

That's OK

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By *rongstantineWoman
over a year ago

hull

There may be no positivity towards larger men, but there's also no negativity (media wise) either. Plus size women are advocating obesity whereas plus size men are just that- accepted as they are.

Personally I prefer larger men, but it's the attitude they carry and sheer comfort in their skin that does it for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your marmite is my caviar

My caviar is your sprouts lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok, do you think it's more socially ok for men to like curvy woman because of the growing positivity towards it?

I ask because if a woman admitted to liking bigger men it would be met with more negative than positive"

I have received a lot of negativity and abuse for only liking extra large guys, but it's what I like and I'm not going to change my opinion just because of what others think

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By *ollycouple71Couple
over a year ago

manchester

"Embrace it, sexy is a attitude not a shape, love your skin and you’ll shine. "
love this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To the OP....God knows, women have for years and years, and still do, have to put up with the "body ideal concept" thanks to the constant barrage of it by media and advertising and only now is there recognition of this. Conversely i find the same starting to happen to men - constant barrage of six packs, pecs "guns" etc and it starts to, including me, affect how we feel about ourselves as you begin to think thats all people want now.

I really wish this "perfect imagery" was derailed - it could start with programmes such as "Love Island" for example having some normal, intelligent people on it for example.

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

prefer a keg to a six pack

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Away for Christmas

"This is the impression I'm getting well looking around on here.

I think it's because body positivity is promoted more towards women than it is towards men.

What do you think?"

Here is the thing with this.

Women tend to be less vocal about pointing out they find x or y attractive. Those that are vocal generally lean towards socialy favoured attractiveness anyway.

Men tend to be very vocal and more willing to let their own personal standards with regards to preferences and attraction expand slightly (or a lot) if it ups chances of a result.

Bottom line is somebody, be it 1 or 1 million, your own body type will be attractive to them, and unattractive to others.

Note! This does not apply to all men and women. It is not a sweeping generalisation, but observation supports it.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"What does “curvy” even mean for a male body?"

Moobs?

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By *estcountryDadBodMan
over a year ago

Exeter

You say it’s not ok to be curvy, says who? Some women will like muscular, some will like average, some will like chubby.

I think it’s more important you are happy with you and try not to please all the people all the time.

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By *risky businessMan
over a year ago

APharaohWay

"This is the impression I'm getting well looking around on here.

I think it's because body positivity is promoted more towards women than it is towards men.

What do you think?"
if you feel good about yourself why care what others think go with the flow feel positive then your get what you deserve

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By *lwaysup4it69Couple
over a year ago

Kirkby in Ashfield

Ok, do you think it's more socially ok for men to like curvy woman because of the growing positivity towards it?

I ask because if a woman admitted to liking bigger men it would be met with more negative than positive

I have received a lot of negativity and abuse for only liking extra large guys, but it's what I like and I'm not going to change my opinion just because of what others think "

As a much larger guy this is so refreshing. Wish I was in your age range

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Personally, positivity and personality are more important than body size.

There's plenty of others who think the same."

This. And personally I found Chris Pratt way hotter in parks and rec before he got all "buff". Just depends on the person I guess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men curve in the wrong places

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a lot of folks who obviously don't know or know and try to hide their shape in their profiles very narrow description.

I've been with thin, curvy and larger folks of both sexes and found all of them attractive for different reasons.

I class myself as average, 6'2" with a 48" chest and 38" waist.

I'm quite body conscious but the folks I've met on here over the years tell me I look great.

Confidence and looking for the right folks go along way to making swinging a happy experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am not into skinny guys xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rather than the body I am much more interested in the eyes and face of a person. I love a pretty face and regardless of their body type. Also once I get that connection it’s then down to personality.

My look is not what is regarded as sexy. A big beard. Bit of a belly, but once I’m actually chatting to people they realise that I’m actually quite a nice guy.

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