FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

A thread for the lonely.

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

There are so many of us who are currently feeling lonely. It might be because you’re isolating or living alone. It might be that you’re surrounded by people but still feeling alone. Join this thread and get chatting to each other. Doesn’t have to be sexual, just finding out about each other and offering some mutual support.

No need to comment if you don’t have anything positive to say

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are so many of us who are currently feeling lonely. It might be because you’re isolating or living alone. It might be that you’re surrounded by people but still feeling alone. Join this thread and get chatting to each other. Doesn’t have to be sexual, just finding out about each other and offering some mutual support.

No need to comment if you don’t have anything positive to say "

Great Post and full of positivity, I hope lots of people join in and take something away from it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My penis is available for warm hugs any time Incie

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"My penis is available for warm hugs any time Incie "

Thank you for that kind offer

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hilledGuerillaMan
over a year ago

In the monkey house

Outside of work I am unfortunately fairly alone. I would certainly appreciate a chat sometimes about any old subject.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tm321Man
over a year ago

ask


"My penis is available for warm hugs any time Incie

Thank you for that kind offer "

And if your other hand is feeling left out then give mine a hug too

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My penis is available for warm hugs any time Incie "

I would hug your penis

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is something that's pissing me off at the moment.

I know it's a sex site.

I know 99% want fun.

But sometimes some of us are stuck in hell and completely loose the energy to care.

There's plenty of threads to flirt and play on.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"This is something that's pissing me off at the moment.

I know it's a sex site.

I know 99% want fun.

But sometimes some of us are stuck in hell and completely loose the energy to care.

There's plenty of threads to flirt and play on."

Let’s try and make this one different?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This is something that's pissing me off at the moment.

I know it's a sex site.

I know 99% want fun.

But sometimes some of us are stuck in hell and completely loose the energy to care.

There's plenty of threads to flirt and play on."

I know exactly what you mean and I was having this conversation with incandescent earlier...I will admit I am struggling at the moment.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not feeling this myself...

But I've been there and wouldn't ever want anyone else to feel lonely or alone.

Always happy to chat if anyone needs a friend

Lu

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was thinking about starting a thread of inspirational quotes but this seems a good place to post.

Japanese proverb: 'One kind word will see you three months of Winter.'

Be kind, especially when it's cold inside and out !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My inbox is always open for virtual hugs and talking bollocks about stuff and things

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Was thinking about starting a thread of inspirational quotes but this seems a good place to post.

Japanese proverb: 'One kind word will see you three months of Winter.'

Be kind, especially when it's cold inside and out ! "

Have you ever been to Japan?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wrong emoji, should be a !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Was thinking about starting a thread of inspirational quotes but this seems a good place to post.

Japanese proverb: 'One kind word will see you three months of Winter.'

Be kind, especially when it's cold inside and out !

Have you ever been to Japan?"
.

No, but I'm attracted to a lot of Asian philosophy and thinking.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

In a room full of people, thats when I feel it most x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

I struggle at times and the tears seem to fall from my eyes way to easily for no apparent reason. I’m not totally alone as I have my two youngest at home but I have still felt very very lonely at times. I’m luckier than some as I have some wonderful friends, my family and a man I love but at times I’ve never felt so loved yet so alone

I miss human contact

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a good listener if anyone ever needs to chat or rant, it’s good to chat to people we don’t know. Could do with it myself going by the week I’ve had

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Feeling lonely and totally alone. I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel and I can see it. But right now I need cuddles,i need open space. I need to be able to go for a coffee somewhere,anywhere. I know everyone feels the same right now but i just needed to vent. I'll be more composed in a few days,back to not feeling anything. Sending love to everyone whose finding it difficult

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

Not sure if I feel lonely or whether I have become overly adapted to solitary confinement.

Besides work, my only real 'conversations' consist almost entirely of forum postings. Any Fab messages relate solely to my forum contributions which aren't at all about me.

My WhatsApp conversations consist of people sending me pics of the snow, supermarket queues, their children learning to walk/talk/eat, memes and... Actually that's it.

I think I feel very disconnected and I'm filling the void with other people's lives.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol


"My inbox is always open for virtual hugs and talking bollocks about stuff and things "

I seem to be good at talking bollocks

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not sure if I feel lonely or whether I have become overly adapted to solitary confinement.

Besides work, my only real 'conversations' consist almost entirely of forum postings. Any Fab messages relate solely to my forum contributions which aren't at all about me.

My WhatsApp conversations consist of people sending me pics of the snow, supermarket queues, their children learning to walk/talk/eat, memes and... Actually that's it.

I think I feel very disconnected and I'm filling the void with other people's lives. "

Can associate with this. The only face to face conversations I have are with the checkout person.

All human contact is via whatsapp and these forums. I've got used to it so much I may have to work to get my gregarious self back. Sure it won't take long.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

Like a lot of people I guess have good days and bad days

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm certainly struggling.

I'm in that wonderful circle of wanting to totally withdraw (which is impossible due to work and being a mum) and then feeling utterly alone. The Valentines aisle actually made me cry last week. Ridiculous.

And I feel angry a lot, which is because I don't feel in control of what is going on. I've had to distance myself from a lot of friends who moan about their other halves because I just wish they knew how tough it is to be a single parent right now. Then I beat myself up for not being supportive of their struggles. So, erm, yeah.....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"I'm certainly struggling.

I'm in that wonderful circle of wanting to totally withdraw (which is impossible due to work and being a mum) and then feeling utterly alone. The Valentines aisle actually made me cry last week. Ridiculous.

And I feel angry a lot, which is because I don't feel in control of what is going on. I've had to distance myself from a lot of friends who moan about their other halves because I just wish they knew how tough it is to be a single parent right now. Then I beat myself up for not being supportive of their struggles. So, erm, yeah....."

Think I can kind of relate. Caring for my terminally ill mother, I wouldn't say I feel suffocated, but there's certainly a tension within me at times. Yesterday I needed to get some milk and instead of driving I walked to a supermarket further away in the slippery ice and lied about doing so and said there were roadworks which delayed me. I felt bad but almost instantaneously that feeling subsided and the tension returned. I returned to my laptop to do work where I don't even bother to hide my irritable disposition whenever my boss calls. Meanwhile I receive more WhatsApp videos of toddlers spooning yoghurt into their faces followed by a row of emojis.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I struggle at times and the tears seem to fall from my eyes way to easily for no apparent reason. I’m not totally alone as I have my two youngest at home but I have still felt very very lonely at times. I’m luckier than some as I have some wonderful friends, my family and a man I love but at times I’ve never felt so loved yet so alone

I miss human contact

"
This is exactly how I feel I've my wife at home and have wonderful family and friends and work colleagues but quite often for no apparent reason feel like I'm standing in the antartic so lonely and cold no idea why.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know I have been completely up and down since Xmas.

I’m lucky I have my kids & am in a bubble with my folks but the endless monotony of only seeing the same faces day in day out is starting to get to me. Quite frankly I think we are all fed up with each other. I’m a social creature & thrive on having a variety of things to do, places to go & people to see.

Like someone else mentioned it’s that feeling of being disconnected from the world.

My motivation wanes constantly and find most of the time I just can’t be arsed.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would love a chat

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm certainly struggling.

I'm in that wonderful circle of wanting to totally withdraw (which is impossible due to work and being a mum) and then feeling utterly alone. The Valentines aisle actually made me cry last week. Ridiculous.

And I feel angry a lot, which is because I don't feel in control of what is going on. I've had to distance myself from a lot of friends who moan about their other halves because I just wish they knew how tough it is to be a single parent right now. Then I beat myself up for not being supportive of their struggles. So, erm, yeah.....

Think I can kind of relate. Caring for my terminally ill mother, I wouldn't say I feel suffocated, but there's certainly a tension within me at times. Yesterday I needed to get some milk and instead of driving I walked to a supermarket further away in the slippery ice and lied about doing so and said there were roadworks which delayed me. I felt bad but almost instantaneously that feeling subsided and the tension returned. I returned to my laptop to do work where I don't even bother to hide my irritable disposition whenever my boss calls. Meanwhile I receive more WhatsApp videos of toddlers spooning yoghurt into their faces followed by a row of emojis. "

I hope you are getting support caring for your mum - that is tough in 'normal' times, let alone in a pandemic.

I keep thinking about that old cliché that 'you can't pour from an empty cup' and that carers - whether parents or adults caring for someone ill - need to make sure we are stocked with the resilience it takes to ensure we can look after others. I feel like I'm running on empty 99% of the time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rDb792Man
over a year ago

Plymouth

[Removed by poster at 09/02/21 17:06:52]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace


"I'm certainly struggling.

I'm in that wonderful circle of wanting to totally withdraw (which is impossible due to work and being a mum) and then feeling utterly alone. The Valentines aisle actually made me cry last week. Ridiculous.

And I feel angry a lot, which is because I don't feel in control of what is going on. I've had to distance myself from a lot of friends who moan about their other halves because I just wish they knew how tough it is to be a single parent right now. Then I beat myself up for not being supportive of their struggles. So, erm, yeah....."

I hear ya! Completely same boat, only other human contact I have is my mum who pops by when she can as shes in my bubble.

Even worse since I was furloughed again, at least working I had a bit of change from just being on my own and being mum, now it's just mum sat in on my own.

And the valentine's thing just dumps even more on top.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am lucky in that generally I am fairly happy in my own skin.

That said I can empathise with those that find themselves alone even in the company of others.

Hopefully fab friends will provide a little support.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"I'm certainly struggling.

I'm in that wonderful circle of wanting to totally withdraw (which is impossible due to work and being a mum) and then feeling utterly alone. The Valentines aisle actually made me cry last week. Ridiculous.

And I feel angry a lot, which is because I don't feel in control of what is going on. I've had to distance myself from a lot of friends who moan about their other halves because I just wish they knew how tough it is to be a single parent right now. Then I beat myself up for not being supportive of their struggles. So, erm, yeah.....

Think I can kind of relate. Caring for my terminally ill mother, I wouldn't say I feel suffocated, but there's certainly a tension within me at times. Yesterday I needed to get some milk and instead of driving I walked to a supermarket further away in the slippery ice and lied about doing so and said there were roadworks which delayed me. I felt bad but almost instantaneously that feeling subsided and the tension returned. I returned to my laptop to do work where I don't even bother to hide my irritable disposition whenever my boss calls. Meanwhile I receive more WhatsApp videos of toddlers spooning yoghurt into their faces followed by a row of emojis.

I hope you are getting support caring for your mum - that is tough in 'normal' times, let alone in a pandemic.

I keep thinking about that old cliché that 'you can't pour from an empty cup' and that carers - whether parents or adults caring for someone ill - need to make sure we are stocked with the resilience it takes to ensure we can look after others. I feel like I'm running on empty 99% of the time. "

I was just about to post the same. I have nothing to give. All my energies are conserved and utilised to simply to get on with stuff. But funnily enough I am able to post on Fab every ten minutes before I return to my duties. Yet if friends and family want to share their daily humdrum with me, I switch off. Can't work that one out yet.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are so many of us who are currently feeling lonely. It might be because you’re isolating or living alone. It might be that you’re surrounded by people but still feeling alone. Join this thread and get chatting to each other. Doesn’t have to be sexual, just finding out about each other and offering some mutual support.

No need to comment if you don’t have anything positive to say "

Aww definitely agree, chatting online helps helps just a nice message checking in see how we are

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My penis is available for warm hugs any time Incie

I would hug your penis "

Really? How would you hug it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is getting harder the longer it goes on and no end date in sight. I've resigned myself to the fact ill have days where it gets to me more than others but it is just a day. I'm on my own other than my hounds and literally ache to be held by someone but... It will end. Chin up n tits out

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool


"There are so many of us who are currently feeling lonely. It might be because you’re isolating or living alone. It might be that you’re surrounded by people but still feeling alone. Join this thread and get chatting to each other. Doesn’t have to be sexual, just finding out about each other and offering some mutual support.

No need to comment if you don’t have anything positive to say "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I often find that this place magnifies my loneliness.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I often find that this place magnifies my loneliness. "

I hear you. I find it harder at the moment too.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a tough time at the moment! After a tough breakup a few months back and being on furlough I just tend to have my dog for company. With lockdown it’s a pretty shitty time as you can’t even visit friends or do anything.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm certainly struggling.

I'm in that wonderful circle of wanting to totally withdraw (which is impossible due to work and being a mum) and then feeling utterly alone. The Valentines aisle actually made me cry last week. Ridiculous.

And I feel angry a lot, which is because I don't feel in control of what is going on. I've had to distance myself from a lot of friends who moan about their other halves because I just wish they knew how tough it is to be a single parent right now. Then I beat myself up for not being supportive of their struggles. So, erm, yeah.....

Think I can kind of relate. Caring for my terminally ill mother, I wouldn't say I feel suffocated, but there's certainly a tension within me at times. Yesterday I needed to get some milk and instead of driving I walked to a supermarket further away in the slippery ice and lied about doing so and said there were roadworks which delayed me. I felt bad but almost instantaneously that feeling subsided and the tension returned. I returned to my laptop to do work where I don't even bother to hide my irritable disposition whenever my boss calls. Meanwhile I receive more WhatsApp videos of toddlers spooning yoghurt into their faces followed by a row of emojis.

I hope you are getting support caring for your mum - that is tough in 'normal' times, let alone in a pandemic.

I keep thinking about that old cliché that 'you can't pour from an empty cup' and that carers - whether parents or adults caring for someone ill - need to make sure we are stocked with the resilience it takes to ensure we can look after others. I feel like I'm running on empty 99% of the time.

I was just about to post the same. I have nothing to give. All my energies are conserved and utilised to simply to get on with stuff. But funnily enough I am able to post on Fab every ten minutes before I return to my duties. Yet if friends and family want to share their daily humdrum with me, I switch off. Can't work that one out yet. "

Yes, exactly this! I can talk to people on here, yet don't answer the phone to my friends. Its so odd but I'm glad I'm not the only one.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I often find that this place magnifies my loneliness.

I hear you. I find it harder at the moment too. "

Definitely an issue. Sparkle said earlier that a crowded room can be a lonely place and Fab can be a virtual version of that, plus added beautiful bodies that don’t always help with our self esteem.

Trying to limit my time here and concentrate on chats and laughs with the few Fab people I hope I’ve made a good connection with. Amplify the positive, limit the negative.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isces WomanWoman
over a year ago

West London

I live on my own with my lovely fur baby daisy. This lockdown is awful. I'm over netflix and box sets. I want out. I want hot tubs eating our eating in etc

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyInkedBiWoman
over a year ago

.

Coming up to the anniversary of losing my husband, this time of year is always tough. Chose family bereavement just before Christmas too, been feeling quite blue

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My work is normally quite sociable in the charitable/third sector. Working with all sorts of people, many of whom are retired and vulnerable. We've had to suspend 99% of our operations. So I was furloughed fulltime for a while, but now almost back up to my normal hours. Ordinarily I'd speak to and support 25-35 people a week: they do voluntary work which is great for their physical and mental health.

I didn't get to see my son for about 6months, and when Cummings got away with what he did, my son's mother and just thought "wtf", which is a rarity that we agree on something. I volunteered in the local community offering to get shopping in, deliver mail, but no one needed my help. I undertook shopping for my dad who is high risk and never left home for what seemed like ages, then he was found to have cancer. The NHS were amazing and between first being forced to get a check up by my nagging, and being declared cancer free (as for now) was about 3 months. I was shopping for my niece's mother, a single parent, who gives her daughter 24hour care due to a debilitating illness.

I really hoped to have lots of mutually fulfilling sex and make new friends in 2020. Instead I scrapped my profile and gained weight.

Bastard.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Coming up to the anniversary of losing my husband, this time of year is always tough. Chose family bereavement just before Christmas too, been feeling quite blue "

Virtual hugs and we'll wishes, please if you feel down, reach out for support... to anyone x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/02/21 18:06:30]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I lost my partner a couple of years ago, things have got easier of course and I do not do lonely that much. Would be good to have a woman to talk to at the very least though. Fingers crossed

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Coming up to the anniversary of losing my husband, this time of year is always tough. Chose family bereavement just before Christmas too, been feeling quite blue "

That's hard. Anniversaries are tough and more so at the moment x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Coming up to the anniversary of losing my husband, this time of year is always tough. Chose family bereavement just before Christmas too, been feeling quite blue "

It is not easy is it? I find it takes you by surprise at times, that unexpected thump in the chest of reality is tough. Take some care

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spent my 21st birthday in lockdown.

Cant meet my friends.

Had to move home to my grumpy parents lol

Cant see my friends from uni.

Locked away life in my bedroom is so excitingggggggggggg lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ruebameMan
over a year ago

from the womb and tryout to get back

I'm quite a positive person don't really get down but always willing to talk if anyone needs someone to listen I'm here if I can help

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *on-snowedMan
over a year ago

harlow


"Spent my 21st birthday in lockdown.

Cant meet my friends.

Had to move home to my grumpy parents lol

Cant see my friends from uni.

Locked away life in my bedroom is so excitingggggggggggg lol "

In two months we all have had our birthdays in lockdown.

Its been horrendous ive almost forgotten how to interact with other people

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olex99Man
over a year ago

Hull

Been living alone since 2007. All of the things I like to do have been cancelled since March 2020. Luckily I can still go into work , although they are trying to force us to work from home. I refused as I don't want to be on my own at home 24 hours a day. Bearing up fairly well but some new friends are always welcome.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lacklovingwomanWoman
over a year ago

St. Neots

I am struggling and this forum, I hope, will be a good thing for very lonely people xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spent my 21st birthday in lockdown.

Cant meet my friends.

Had to move home to my grumpy parents lol

Cant see my friends from uni.

Locked away life in my bedroom is so excitingggggggggggg lol

In two months we all have had our birthdays in lockdown.

Its been horrendous ive almost forgotten how to interact with other people "

But 21st is meant to be a big one not a crap boring nasty one on your own lol x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This was exactly the forum I needed!! Thank you so much OP X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

Thank you for starting this thread Incandescent. Loneliness can often be such a taboo topic and one which many are wary of admitting to because there's still quite a lot of judgement attached to feeling that way. As in, if you're lonely you only have yourself to blame, that you're not making the 'effort' or, simply, you must be some unappealing weirdo that no one would want to be friends with anyway. When in reality there are umpteen reasons why some people suffer - from social anxiety to dearth of opportunity (if you work on your own for example), or being isolated within an abusive relationship, or having little or no disposable income with which to socialise, or travel to see people, to being restricted by a disability... the list goes on.

In some respects (and obviously leaving aside all the other considerations of the situation) the pandemic has allowed loneliness to be spoken about more openly and honestly because suddenly, there are millions more feeling the full force of social isolation. In a strange way, during the first lockdown I actually felt better about myself than I usually do as someone who struggles socially because for the first time in living memory there seemed to be a mass appreciation of its often devastating impact. This meant I didn't feel as 'apart' from the mainstream as usual and it even felt slightly reassuring. However I do wonder if the currently increased (for obvious reasons) awareness of loneliness will continue once people can resume their usual social lives?

See... when things go back to 'normal' or something approaching it, most people will understandably be relieved, far happier than they are now and boosted by being able to resume real life human interaction again. But if you found socialising difficult 'before' it's still going to be hard 'after' and quite possibly even harder, because undoubtedly there's going to be a lot of celebrating going on, a lot of reconnecting etc. And those who've struggled with loneliness long before covid was ever heard of won't be part of the new normal any more than they were part of the old. If we're talking about loneliness specifically those missing friends and family have a light at the end of the tunnel, notwithstanding the frustration of not currently knowing how long the tunnel is so to speak. But not everyone has that light.

Personally, yes, I'm desperately lonely but that's not new for me. Perhaps I was therfore better equipped to deal with day to day life when 'all this' started as nothing much changed socially for me - it wasn't the same shock to my system as it was for many. However as time's gone on I've felt more lonely than usual. Tiers /lockdown have scuppered the extremely small number of people I can occasionally see and I have had very few adult conversations this past year unless they've involved the care of others in some way. I've certainly had a tiny number of what might be described as social conversations. And it's really hit home how minute a pool of support I have. Which of course then makes me feel pretty worthless and inadequate.

A few responses have mentioned feeling lonely in a crowded room and yes, I completely get that. Given that Fab is akin to a virtual room I do question remaining here and what effect it's having on my mental health. I lurk on the forums but admittedly don't post much these days because a) I usually don't have the time to get properly involved (it truly baffles me how some people manage to contribute as much as they do on such a regular basis) and b) well, I usually feel just as socially awkward here as I do in the real world. Quite clearly a lot of friendships exist on the site and there are regular threads along those lines which can feel like a great big love in but unfortunately for any of us who aren't gregarious and don't have the natural ability to make friends easily, such threads can be quite painful as they're yet another reminder of loneliness and being 'outwith' (and can trigger horrible self doubt/criticism etc).

I don't know what the answer is and have rambled on. I do sympathise with anyone else feeling lonely and hope you'll be allowed to remedy that soon because I wouldn't wish this state on anyone. I'm very envious (I know that's not an attractive quality) of people who actually have a decent pool of friends and family to miss, but who can nonetheless keep in touch and find mutual support from calls, virtual get togethers, quiz nights, texts and so on.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love this thread, delighted you started it. I have never felt so lonely as I have the last few months. This lockdown has been really hard, thankfully I get to go out to work a few times a week , even if only 2 or 3 in office.

I have tried to explain to friends in relationships and they say they feel the same, but it's not. When I wake at 4am screaming and crying into my pillow there isnt anyone to turn too and hold me and tell me everything is going to be okay.

So if anyone wants to chat just drop me a pm.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *not123Couple
over a year ago

sp1

House full of animals, partner And a 25 Yr old son and extremely lonely in it I'm glad when I go to work people talk to me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

I’m comfortable in my own company, even working from home for nearly 12 months has been ok.

I miss human contact.... my friends and family but most of all I miss my girlfriends and our social interaction that’s been the biggest wrench.

I miss hugs and laughter!

I’m always happy to chat here or Kik with anyone I can help. Please shout me. I would PM you Hippy but can’t

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *not123Couple
over a year ago

sp1

But even in a relationship I don't get that he will have seen I'd been. Crying and I don't ever get held or asked if I'm OK. I just get have you been crying then he bk in the TV b4 I can answer. Lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iaisonseekerMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Some beautiful souls like fireflies in a jar on this thread.

"The only thing I knew how to do was to keep on keeping on." Bob Dylan

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *athan 123Man
over a year ago

rochdale oldham border

Great thread so Weldone OP if anyone wants a chat com here most days I’m currently isolating so perfect timing if your lonely view mr pics they will cheers you up

Joking if wanna chat I’m here x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thank you for starting this thread Incandescent. Loneliness can often be such a taboo topic and one which many are wary of admitting to because there's still quite a lot of judgement attached to feeling that way. As in, if you're lonely you only have yourself to blame, that you're not making the 'effort' or, simply, you must be some unappealing weirdo that no one would want to be friends with anyway.. "

Sorry for snipping the quote, just want to say this was such an insightful and empathetic post. I know you said you feel socially awkward, but you seem a beautiful soul.

I don't think I've ever felt as lonely in my life as I do now and I am someone who loves days by myself. I've found myself shutting out friends and family because they all have someone to go home to and I feel guilty for being jealous of that.

I had quite a horrendous relationship breakdown during 'Lockdown v.1' and I feel like I've just had to deal with it all on my own, which makes me feel like superwoman some days, and then other days I cry on the bus

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *trueceltMan
over a year ago

Bristol

I have messaged a few privately (and not just the girls!) but I will post this publicly because I seem to have an inbuilt way of staying happy or happy-ish. I'm a great conversationalist, a good listener and a big talker of bollocks so, if any of you want to chat, vent or just scream a bit, I'm here. Most of the time, actually

Marty

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to honestly ask yourself why you feel lonely. It's not just because you are living alone in lockdown. You can be lonely in a crowded room. It's not always about being an introvert. The most outgoing of people can be desperately lonely. Until you accept why you feel that way, you won't know how to might be able to address it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

[Removed by poster at 09/02/21 21:56:14]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"House full of animals, partner And a 25 Yr old son and extremely lonely in it I'm glad when I go to work people talk to me. "

I expect a lot of people are like this

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Outside of work I am unfortunately fairly alone."

As am I. I am lucky in that I still see my children twice a week but, outside of those times if I am at home I am there alone.

At work we frequently work alone anyway and being single as well I do find myself trying to start conversations with the staff in Tesco! In itself that's not a bad thing but it's the mild desperation of loneliness that's causing it and that's not good.

So, yes, I have quite recently realised that I am, essentially, lonely.

It's wearing me down, over time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"I often find that this place magnifies my loneliness. "

Sending you love Hope. When you feel like that you can always message me. If you're up to it that is! x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately I’m always in my own company..

Not always a bad thing but it is a lot more difficult these days.. I just look forward to the weekends I have my sprouts and get daddy cuddles... roll on Friday

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Unfortunately I’m always in my own company..

Not always a bad thing but it is a lot more difficult these days.. I just look forward to the weekends I have my sprouts and get daddy cuddles... roll on Friday "

'Sprouts' is the cutest description, I might nick that from now on!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I’m glad to see that this thread has provided a place for people to share their feelings. A big thank you to those who have offered to listen too.

I’d like to suggest one thing.

Choose someone from the thread who’s story had resonated with you and either pm them or leave them a message here. It could lead to a beautiful friendship or at least a support line. Something a lot of us seem to need atm..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire


"I’m glad to see that this thread has provided a place for people to share their feelings. A big thank you to those who have offered to listen too.

I’d like to suggest one thing.

Choose someone from the thread who’s story had resonated with you and either pm them or leave them a message here. It could lead to a beautiful friendship or at least a support line. Something a lot of us seem to need atm.. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"I’m glad to see that this thread has provided a place for people to share their feelings. A big thank you to those who have offered to listen too.

I’d like to suggest one thing.

Choose someone from the thread who’s story had resonated with you and either pm them or leave them a message here. It could lead to a beautiful friendship or at least a support line. Something a lot of us seem to need atm.. "

Fine idea. I might drop a few of you a line. But all are welcome to message me too if anybody feels inclined to. I promise I'll try not to be annoying

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m glad to see that this thread has provided a place for people to share their feelings. A big thank you to those who have offered to listen too.

I’d like to suggest one thing.

Choose someone from the thread who’s story had resonated with you and either pm them or leave them a message here. It could lead to a beautiful friendship or at least a support line. Something a lot of us seem to need atm.. "

I’d like to say thanks to the OP for starting the thread. Happy to be contacted by anyone who want to chat or feels lonely atm.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m glad to see that this thread has provided a place for people to share their feelings. A big thank you to those who have offered to listen too.

I’d like to suggest one thing.

Choose someone from the thread who’s story had resonated with you and either pm them or leave them a message here. It could lead to a beautiful friendship or at least a support line. Something a lot of us seem to need atm.. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s been a hard year, but this last lockdown is taking more of a toll. I’m lucky I don’t live alone, I have my kids but I miss adult conversation and hugs with mr. I’d just like to be able to get out and have some time to myself, caring without a break is wearing me out physically and mentally x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lexa999Woman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

I have been struggling in recent months, I've been working from home and live alone. There are days when I actually don't even speak out loud to anyone. The abundance of texts, WhatsApps etc from family, friends and colleagues are great but I miss actually being around people. I'm getting lazy too, so trying to go out for a walk most days. The majority of people I know have had tough times over the last year. Reach out to anyone, sometimes a fresh approach, a newly made friend, or something new can change your outlook.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This year has almost killed me, being alone and suffering with mental health issues is never good. But add to that the isolation of being stuck seeing the same 4 walls. I spend half my day in bits and the other half just trying to keep myself busy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo


"You need to honestly ask yourself why you feel lonely. It's not just because you are living alone in lockdown. You can be lonely in a crowded room. It's not always about being an introvert. The most outgoing of people can be desperately lonely. Until you accept why you feel that way, you won't know how to might be able to address it."

I should imagine there are 1001 different answers to that depending on who you ask! Personally, I have felt some degree of loneliness for much of my adult life regardless of whether or not I was living on my own. Sometimes loneliness will feel exacerbated at a particular time if your resilience levels are low - such as poor mental or physical health - even if your social situation hasn't changed. And sometimes you feel lonely for a particular sort of connection regardless of having other types if that makes sense? I have lost almost all the members of my family I was close to for example and it's been a very long time since I had a close female friend which I really miss (and need). I've never found it easy to either make friends or socialise, I often find the process both bewildering and exhausting because I rarely 'click' with others and usually feel very much on the outside looking in. I don't do small talk, although of course I know the theory of it but just don't seem able to glide from that to more interesting topics as you must to get to know someone. I'm quite wary of people (which probably does me no favours) and I can be uncomfortable opening up but several past experiences of having my trust broken and being let down in different ways no doubt unfortunately contributes to that which doesn't help either. I can recognise at least some of the traits within myself that have possibly/probably led to being lonely and in ideal world I'd have had far more counselling than I ever did to try to tackle some of them and perhaps find some coping techniques but sadly that's a luxury beyond my means.

Although lockdown etc hasn't altered my loneliness level too much what it has done of course is remove the things which could be a distraction *from* loneliness in normal times. Just something as simple as going for a non essential drive to somewhere different or visiting an attraction of some description. Hell, even going for a walk somewhere pleasant that's not your home town. Not that any of that solves loneliness as such but it can help you not to dwell on it quite so much. Hence I've been thinking more and more lately about being lonely which of course always seems to strike worst of all in the middle of the bloody night when the dark and the quietness makes you feel like the only person on the planet.

I know I'm not alone ... I know lots are struggling with similar feelings ... but despite knowing that, ironically, I still feel lonely. Gah. It's hard because I can't even properly blame lockdown for the way I feel.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for this! I was taken into A&E a few weeks ago with palpitations and got admitted, it was really scary - still don’t know what it was (not a heart attack thankfully) I moved from Scotland just before lockdown 1 to Hampshire, and I hadn’t noticed how in auto pilot I was until I went to hospital. I felt so lonely, there was no one to pick me up, or even take me there - I was so far away from my family. I was also dealing with unrequited emotional feelings for someone who seen things as just sex and I had misread - so I really found the last few weeks quite difficult. So it’s really nice OP that you’ve opened up the dialogue! Hope I don’t sound too “poor me!” It’s just been a bit a of a bummer of a time x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowy and the GruffaloCouple
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire


"There are so many of us who are currently feeling lonely. It might be because you’re isolating or living alone. It might be that you’re surrounded by people but still feeling alone. Join this thread and get chatting to each other. Doesn’t have to be sexual, just finding out about each other and offering some mutual support.

No need to comment if you don’t have anything positive to say "

What a nice thing to say.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m glad to see that this thread has provided a place for people to share their feelings. A big thank you to those who have offered to listen too.

I’d like to suggest one thing.

Choose someone from the thread who’s story had resonated with you and either pm them or leave them a message here. It could lead to a beautiful friendship or at least a support line. Something a lot of us seem to need atm.. "

This is a great idea!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowy and the GruffaloCouple
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire


"Thanks for this! I was taken into A&E a few weeks ago with palpitations and got admitted, it was really scary - still don’t know what it was (not a heart attack thankfully) I moved from Scotland just before lockdown 1 to Hampshire, and I hadn’t noticed how in auto pilot I was until I went to hospital. I felt so lonely, there was no one to pick me up, or even take me there - I was so far away from my family. I was also dealing with unrequited emotional feelings for someone who seen things as just sex and I had misread - so I really found the last few weeks quite difficult. So it’s really nice OP that you’ve opened up the dialogue! Hope I don’t sound too “poor me!” It’s just been a bit a of a bummer of a time x "

I’m sorry this happened to you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"Thanks for this! I was taken into A&E a few weeks ago with palpitations and got admitted, it was really scary - still don’t know what it was (not a heart attack thankfully) I moved from Scotland just before lockdown 1 to Hampshire, and I hadn’t noticed how in auto pilot I was until I went to hospital. I felt so lonely, there was no one to pick me up, or even take me there - I was so far away from my family. I was also dealing with unrequited emotional feelings for someone who seen things as just sex and I had misread - so I really found the last few weeks quite difficult. So it’s really nice OP that you’ve opened up the dialogue! Hope I don’t sound too “poor me!” It’s just been a bit a of a bummer of a time x "

Panic attack?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks for this! I was taken into A&E a few weeks ago with palpitations and got admitted, it was really scary - still don’t know what it was (not a heart attack thankfully) I moved from Scotland just before lockdown 1 to Hampshire, and I hadn’t noticed how in auto pilot I was until I went to hospital. I felt so lonely, there was no one to pick me up, or even take me there - I was so far away from my family. I was also dealing with unrequited emotional feelings for someone who seen things as just sex and I had misread - so I really found the last few weeks quite difficult. So it’s really nice OP that you’ve opened up the dialogue! Hope I don’t sound too “poor me!” It’s just been a bit a of a bummer of a time x

I’m sorry this happened to you. "

Aww thanks. I’m sorry to hear everyone’s stories, what a rough time for people but nice they can share their feelings here x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks for this! I was taken into A&E a few weeks ago with palpitations and got admitted, it was really scary - still don’t know what it was (not a heart attack thankfully) I moved from Scotland just before lockdown 1 to Hampshire, and I hadn’t noticed how in auto pilot I was until I went to hospital. I felt so lonely, there was no one to pick me up, or even take me there - I was so far away from my family. I was also dealing with unrequited emotional feelings for someone who seen things as just sex and I had misread - so I really found the last few weeks quite difficult. So it’s really nice OP that you’ve opened up the dialogue! Hope I don’t sound too “poor me!” It’s just been a bit a of a bummer of a time x

Panic attack? "

Possibly yeah - lots just building up! I’m normally fine on my own, but I dunno I think the combination of rejection and just sitting in a taxi coming back to my empty house after going through that kind of stress made me a little gloomy! Just wanted a pizza and a film haha cuddled up with a friend or partner x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *quaman87Man
over a year ago

Colchester

Ahh im in

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *entish_HeathenMan
over a year ago

Chatham

Always up for some positivity and friendship. I've struggled and reaching out to others has always helped, so just want to give something back

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have suffered from depression and anxiety for a long time. So tend to still feel alone in a crowd

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"Thanks for this! I was taken into A&E a few weeks ago with palpitations and got admitted, it was really scary - still don’t know what it was (not a heart attack thankfully) I moved from Scotland just before lockdown 1 to Hampshire, and I hadn’t noticed how in auto pilot I was until I went to hospital. I felt so lonely, there was no one to pick me up, or even take me there - I was so far away from my family. I was also dealing with unrequited emotional feelings for someone who seen things as just sex and I had misread - so I really found the last few weeks quite difficult. So it’s really nice OP that you’ve opened up the dialogue! Hope I don’t sound too “poor me!” It’s just been a bit a of a bummer of a time x

Panic attack?

Possibly yeah - lots just building up! I’m normally fine on my own, but I dunno I think the combination of rejection and just sitting in a taxi coming back to my empty house after going through that kind of stress made me a little gloomy! Just wanted a pizza and a film haha cuddled up with a friend or partner x "

I think we all have stress points. It's unrealistic to think we are impervious to all pain or worries. When we are living like how we are with everything stripped back we have nowhere to hide. We're all alone in our individual struggles but hopefully, we can find solace in each other x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *JB1954Man
over a year ago

Reading

Yes I agree. Bad enough before lockdown. Worked very unsociable hours. So at work all males . Female contact / chat apart from neighbours who are 20 years older then non existent apart from web chat. Trying to get to chat when now 60+. Can be impossible. Yes last couple weeks have at least got couple messages. Human contact is the best for health and mind. I do realise that at my age most do not want to chat yet even play if it is possible. Perhaps I am lucky , heathy no medication and do not need blue pills. Realise most on here are looking for younger etc. Perhaps if some messaged other just to chat . Then then would help others with some luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nowy and the GruffaloCouple
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

Fab (for us) used to be about meeting up. During lockdown I think it has become more about helping and supporting people who have similar interests who perhaps can’t get this support anywhere else. I hope everyone is getting the support they need from their Fab family. Xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in. I find it's lonely on here too for single gay females. Never used to be. But i do love the banter in the forum. Keeps me going after a hard day in work.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This year has almost killed me, being alone and suffering with mental health issues is never good. But add to that the isolation of being stuck seeing the same 4 walls. I spend half my day in bits and the other half just trying to keep myself busy "

Hello. Sorry to hear your situation. I've found gardening helped me. And i took up art again. From sketching to a landscape or even a fun collage has helped me. Why no give any of yhese a try? See how you go. X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Bump

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool


"Thanks for this! I was taken into A&E a few weeks ago with palpitations and got admitted, it was really scary - still don’t know what it was (not a heart attack thankfully) I moved from Scotland just before lockdown 1 to Hampshire, and I hadn’t noticed how in auto pilot I was until I went to hospital. I felt so lonely, there was no one to pick me up, or even take me there - I was so far away from my family. I was also dealing with unrequited emotional feelings for someone who seen things as just sex and I had misread - so I really found the last few weeks quite difficult. So it’s really nice OP that you’ve opened up the dialogue! Hope I don’t sound too “poor me!” It’s just been a bit a of a bummer of a time x "

I don't think anyone does.

It's extremely hard to open up and say you are feeling lonely but clearly a lot of people are.

I think someone made the point earlier on that loneliness can be seen as a stigma, that there is almost something wrong with you,if you are feeling this way.

Clearly this isnt the case.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I rarely post on serious issue threads. I can relate however, with people's pain regarding loneliness. Been struggling on and off for about 20 years. Been hoping to meet that soulmate to spur each other on. I've got little appetite or drive to improve my situation because of how I feel. A vicious circle.

Lockdown has played its part recently and being on furlough gives me far too much time to drift into the dark. I'm keeping as busy as I can and wouldn't consider myself depressed as such, but certainly not myself if that makes sense. Saddening to read so many struggle with this. Best wishes to you all.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good morning all you beautiful people xx hope you have a lovely day, why not reach out to someone on the thread or pop a text to a friend who you haven't heard from in a while. It just might brighten up someone's day xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like threads like this

I may not be the most frequent visitor or post as much as some but the forums really do help to brighten my days sometimes.

Thank you everyone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tuYorksMan
over a year ago

Barnsley

Good to see this thread. Its not easy to admit that you're lonely or struggling in these difficult times. A reply to a message or just a forum post can be helpful.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

Hi all

Sorry to hear people are having such difficuly times - I’m always haopy to listen if people want to reach out.

I’ve actually been in a very good place in recent times. I say this, not to rub it in, but because if I can get back from the place I was at tumes un recent years, I firmly believe others can.

I’ve coped with the pandemic OK, But I do a job that makes me see just how serious and harrowing it is on a daily basis.

Much as I can walk away from that, I do long to have someone there for a cwtch, a walk....and to take the p**s out of!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff


"Hi all

Sorry to hear people are having such difficuly times - I’m always haopy to listen if people want to reach out.

I’ve actually been in a very good place in recent times. I say this, not to rub it in, but because if I can get back from the place I was at tumes un recent years, I firmly believe others can.

I’ve coped with the pandemic OK, But I do a job that makes me see just how serious and harrowing it is on a daily basis.

Much as I can walk away from that, I do long to have someone there for a cwtch, a walk....and to take the p**s out of!"

Sorry - out walking and hands are freezing. Terrible typing .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

Its certainly not easy . I've been through a lot myself the last 6 months or so , but I stay happier helping others , so my inbox is always open for anyone struggling as I'm sure there are plenty struggling more than me .

Always open to talk guys n gals

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orny IrishMan
over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire

Great idea OP, this pandemic is trying the best of us. If like me you have to be careful of how yiu feel and manage moods and avoid getting too down then this thread will be a great help.

I find myself feeling alone in crowds very often.

Here to talk to anyone who wants to.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orny IrishMan
over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire


"I’m a good listener if anyone ever needs to chat or rant, it’s good to chat to people we don’t know. Could do with it myself going by the week I’ve had "

Happy to chat and share experiences if you want.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

Hopefully those managing to contribute or just reading this thread have managed to obtain something from it even if it is only minute. Maybe some of you have reached out or maybe some have received an unexpected message of support. But if not, I think it can still help to write out our feelings as a release.

Today is much like the others in terms of events so far. The routine is the same. But this morning I woke up and saw that it was sunny. I didn't put on the news but decided to rewatch a funny video I saw yesterday and then I opened my work emails and it's work as usual.

Sometimes we just have better days than others and there's no explicable reasoning. Sometimes we don't want to get out of bed. But every day can be different. We can attempt to make our day as positive as possible but if not, there's always tomorrow too. Being alone isn't entirely within our control. If you find it hard, simply share on here... We're all happy to listen.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great thread happy to chat if anybody needs to

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m not someone who is frightened at the prospect of my own company, I do a lot of stuff on my own, meals out, movies, holidays. But even so this is starting to become a bit much now and a chat would be nice every now and then.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have good days and less good ones. I tend to isolate myself when I'm feeling off.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aisedByWolves85Man
over a year ago

Manchester

I'm isolating now and I'm out with my dog

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I just sit here and cry.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aisedByWolves85Man
over a year ago

Manchester


"Can I just sit here and cry."
I don't see why not

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"Can I just sit here and cry."

This is permitted in here.

*offers shoulder*

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *airytaleOfNewPorkMan
over a year ago

Close By

Afternoon all.... feels like I've been at home on my tod for about 2000 days. Isolated, quiet evenings in the lounge and the sofa is my best friend.... God knows how many box sets I've gone through!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth

It is tough ..but the light is at the end of the tunnel ...spring and sunshine ...and hopefully all vaccinated..

Lovely thread xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uriousblondwifeCouple
over a year ago

wickford

Very good thread indeed.

Same as us, pissed off we cant go anywhere or do anything but then think, imagine the older generation who have no family or friends & indoors looking at the same walls day in day out, now thats hard & our hearts go out to them.

Fab has been a god send during all lockdowns.

There is light at the end of the tunnel people, vaccinations going well, cases dropping, deaths dropping, and them warm sunny summer days/ nights are coming.

So all in all so much to look forward to.

Chin up to who ever is feeling down xxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I just sit here and cry."

Absolutely *cuddles*

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *tuYorksMan
over a year ago

Barnsley


"Can I just sit here and cry."

Yes you can. In fact its positively encouraged. A good cry can be really cathartic x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *not123Couple
over a year ago

sp1

I live in a house with 2 partner and son. I have parents and a brother 15 min drive away. I'm working every other week and chat and see people there and never felt so lonely. Why I ask myself often. There are few reasons but can't do nothing about them.but it's hard (c, the female)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"I live in a house with 2 partner and son. I have parents and a brother 15 min drive away. I'm working every other week and chat and see people there and never felt so lonely. Why I ask myself often. There are few reasons but can't do nothing about them.but it's hard (c, the female) "

Are the reasons temporary which shall pass?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *not123Couple
over a year ago

sp1


"I live in a house with 2 partner and son. I have parents and a brother 15 min drive away. I'm working every other week and chat and see people there and never felt so lonely. Why I ask myself often. There are few reasons but can't do nothing about them.but it's hard (c, the female)

Are the reasons temporary which shall pass? "
They can be sorted out. Just need lockdown over to sort them

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Can I just sit here and cry."

Will someone bring me some tissues please.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm lonely. Live on my own, job that gets me out and about with people been shafted since March

And then I come on here and feel deflated further cause I can't get any conversation going, no one I message ever replies.

I'm not a bad person really.

Anyway hope you're all staying safe. X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How can you share the house, dining table lounge same bed but feel totally like a stranger in your own home after 43yrs. Maybe it's the constant put downs, lack of physical contact, the constant rebuffs you get when you try for a simple hug or kiss, the utter look of disdain if you dare suggest anything intimate, and on the rare occasion you do get intimate them making no secret they think its a chore rather than something they want or like to do and being told to hurry up and get on with it! Or maybe it's being told there's not a problem and everything in the garden is rosy when you raise concerns or their stubborn refusal to discuss things because all is rosy! After many years it kind of wears you down and it could be one or more if these things which makes me feel lonely cold and worthless,, or maybe I just am worthless.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago

Milton keynes


"How can you share the house, dining table lounge same bed but feel totally like a stranger in your own home after 43yrs. Maybe it's the constant put downs, lack of physical contact, the constant rebuffs you get when you try for a simple hug or kiss, the utter look of disdain if you dare suggest anything intimate, and on the rare occasion you do get intimate them making no secret they think its a chore rather than something they want or like to do and being told to hurry up and get on with it! Or maybe it's being told there's not a problem and everything in the garden is rosy when you raise concerns or their stubborn refusal to discuss things because all is rosy! After many years it kind of wears you down and it could be one or more if these things which makes me feel lonely cold and worthless,, or maybe I just am worthless. "

I totally get that. My ex and I were like that at the end of our 11 years marriage. In the end I couldn't take it anymore. I'm much happier now. You are not worthless bud

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey how we all doing today? Sending virtual hugs to anyone that needs it xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff


"Hey how we all doing today? Sending virtual hugs to anyone that needs it xx

"

OK, but done my back in .

I have a friend who’s had sad covid news. I really feel for people in that situation at the moment.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey how we all doing today? Sending virtual hugs to anyone that needs it xx

OK, but done my back in .

I have a friend who’s had sad covid news. I really feel for people in that situation at the moment."

Ah rest up and hope you feel better. Yes all we can do is try and be there for each other x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The comments on this thread are so honest. Thank you all of you for sharing. I do hope well all continue. Oh and about the crying? If it works for you, a brilliant way to let negative energies out

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey how we all doing today? Sending virtual hugs to anyone that needs it xx

"

I really need that,it's my friends funeral in an hour.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff


"Hey how we all doing today? Sending virtual hugs to anyone that needs it xx

OK, but done my back in .

I have a friend who’s had sad covid news. I really feel for people in that situation at the moment.

Ah rest up and hope you feel better. Yes all we can do is try and be there for each other x"

Diolch yn fawr i ti (that’s not rude!)

Sensual Desire is far more deserving of hugs than me, so glad she saw your post.

Hope it goes as well as it can this afternoon, SD.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

Dear OP. I read your post.

No comment

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey how we all doing today? Sending virtual hugs to anyone that needs it xx

I really need that,it's my friends funeral in an hour."

Big hugs from me too then xxx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi OP. Great idea. I'm not lonely, thankfully but can imagine its difficult for those who are. I'm always happy to chat and offer support to anyone who wants to get in touch.

Take care and stay safe all.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I'm not lonely, I just wanted to say you have a beautiful bum OP.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thankyou for the virtual hugs. I didn't feel so alone during the funeral.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

Virtual hugs for those that need them.

It really is hard at the moment and life is definitely taking it's toll on most

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great idea, would love to spark up some chat with likeminded people x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you OP absolutely great thread, i was only speaking about this today, that hole in the soul and loneliness. I try to help people feel they are not alone in these feelings and to reach out. Covid has brought isolation to us, we need to help each other the best we can.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Evening all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *taffsloverboyMan
over a year ago

Hednesford

This is a great thread for single and lonely people. It’s difficult to meet people for romance or great sex so getting back to old fashioned chatting is great fun. Lots to share with each other.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You need to honestly ask yourself why you feel lonely. It's not just because you are living alone in lockdown. You can be lonely in a crowded room. It's not always about being an introvert. The most outgoing of people can be desperately lonely. Until you accept why you feel that way, you won't know how to might be able to address it.

I should imagine there are 1001 different answers to that depending on who you ask! Personally, I have felt some degree of loneliness for much of my adult life regardless of whether or not I was living on my own. Sometimes loneliness will feel exacerbated at a particular time if your resilience levels are low - such as poor mental or physical health - even if your social situation hasn't changed. And sometimes you feel lonely for a particular sort of connection regardless of having other types if that makes sense? I have lost almost all the members of my family I was close to for example and it's been a very long time since I had a close female friend which I really miss (and need). I've never found it easy to either make friends or socialise, I often find the process both bewildering and exhausting because I rarely 'click' with others and usually feel very much on the outside looking in. I don't do small talk, although of course I know the theory of it but just don't seem able to glide from that to more interesting topics as you must to get to know someone. I'm quite wary of people (which probably does me no favours) and I can be uncomfortable opening up but several past experiences of having my trust broken and being let down in different ways no doubt unfortunately contributes to that which doesn't help either. I can recognise at least some of the traits within myself that have possibly/probably led to being lonely and in ideal world I'd have had far more counselling than I ever did to try to tackle some of them and perhaps find some coping techniques but sadly that's a luxury beyond my means.

Although lockdown etc hasn't altered my loneliness level too much what it has done of course is remove the things which could be a distraction *from* loneliness in normal times. Just something as simple as going for a non essential drive to somewhere different or visiting an attraction of some description. Hell, even going for a walk somewhere pleasant that's not your home town. Not that any of that solves loneliness as such but it can help you not to dwell on it quite so much. Hence I've been thinking more and more lately about being lonely which of course always seems to strike worst of all in the middle of the bloody night when the dark and the quietness makes you feel like the only person on the planet.

I know I'm not alone ... I know lots are struggling with similar feelings ... but despite knowing that, ironically, I still feel lonely. Gah. It's hard because I can't even properly blame lockdown for the way I feel.

"

I've only just looked back in on this thread and there are quite a few comments that you have made which I can identify with, but I wouldn't post them for the world, and can't pm you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Great idea, would love to spark up some chat with likeminded people x"

So message someone from the thread?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bumping this thread hope everyone doing ok x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bumping this thread hope everyone doing ok x"

Just trying to get on with stuff and move forward some. Hope all is good with you?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not lonely I have Alexa to talk too

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not lonely I have Alexa to talk too "

A friend of mine was worried about Alexa being part of a goverment Big Brother conspiracy to tap into people's private lives. I laughed, she laughed, Alexa laughed...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only the lonely

Know this feeling ain't right

There goes my baby

There goes my heart

They're gone forever

So far apart

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ax_uk_2009Man
over a year ago

Wilmslow

I lost my partner a little over two yrs ago. I joined Fab mostly for chat and forums but had started venturing out when child care allowed, the lock down part 1 hit. I have found the forums great places to chat to lovely people but miss human contact. Some days the loneliness is painful.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m Michael I’m 36 & I come from West Yorkshire . I’m isolating with been a kidney transplant recipient. Looking to chat to new people & to make others laugh. I love kareoke & singing .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not lonely I have Alexa to talk too

A friend of mine was worried about Alexa being part of a goverment Big Brother conspiracy to tap into people's private lives. I laughed, she laughed, Alexa laughed... "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

For anyone who’s looking for someone to simply talk to, choose someone from this thread whose story resonates with you and send them a message

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/02/21 08:28:19]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Inbox always open to help anyone should they feel the need to talk, be it dirty talk or any other subject matter; better still anyone with a serious condition can always refer to the NHS helpline for professional services.

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm always happy to chat to anyone,of any gender or sexual preferences about anything.

Also give free hugs

So feel free to message me,

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get low and really down and feel so alone but I have people around me all the time. It's hard to explain. I do like talking to people about anything as it takes my mind off crap. Hopefully I'll make some friends here. I'm off to bed(night shift) have a good day all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ememberTheNameMan
over a year ago

barnsley


"There are so many of us who are currently feeling lonely. It might be because you’re isolating or living alone. It might be that you’re surrounded by people but still feeling alone. Join this thread and get chatting to each other. Doesn’t have to be sexual, just finding out about each other and offering some mutual support.

No need to comment if you don’t have anything positive to say "

What a lovely post

I’d love to chat if you feel lonely or if you just want someone to make you feel good ... without blowing my own trumpet I’m the man

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ememberTheNameMan
over a year ago

barnsley


"I'm not lonely I have Alexa to talk too "

Lucky old Alexa

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *ememberTheNameMan
over a year ago

barnsley


"I'm not lonely, I just wanted to say you have a beautiful bum OP. "

I second that

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top