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Simple things you cannot do

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By *.D.I.D.A.S OP   Man
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

Swim breast stroke... I missed swimming lessons at school due to moving and then I was sick when they taught it at my new school so taught myself but don't really know if I'm actually swimming or whether I just think I am.

Poach an egg... Always comes out looking a mess.

Do a tie up using a Windsor knot. My mum taught me the other way and always thought it was the common way. Never felt I needed to learn.

Pop a wheelie on a bike. I haven't owned a bike since it was nicked at 15. Too late to try now dya reckon?

Sing. Less said the better.

Give a woman an orgasm. Just kidding. I'm not totally useless.

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

Put a shelf up, tried a few months ago and it was a fucking disaster drilling. Shelves sat in floor where they'll stay.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I can’t sew and my cooking is quite ropey.

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By *ondon-guy68Man
over a year ago

London

Cook rice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Click my fingers

Mulititask

Fly

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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago

harrow

Ride a bike or swim

I have a condition called dispraxia which makes it very difficult for me to do things that require coordination

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tried to learn ballroom dancing but I've got no rhythm and can't count the beat (Mrs)

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

can't tell the time only digital

can't do imperial, i'm totally metric, so when a guy says 9inches I've not a scooby doo

can't to lighters

can't to leap frog, can't see me starting that one

but

can seem to fuck a guy and wank him at the same time!!!

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By *eoeclipseWoman
over a year ago

glasgow


"Ride a bike or swim

I have a condition called dispraxia which makes it very difficult for me to do things that require coordination "

I've got adhd which makes alot of executive functions difficult...I can't talk on phone & write/type info down nor hear someone right in front of me if there is too much background noise...i'm not deaf but my brain just won't take the info in so I need to rely on lip reading...nightmare atm with masks, I'm largely just nodding & going through motions

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By *.D.I.D.A.S OP   Man
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

I can't or maybe won't do the dance to the Macarena, Saturday Night or Grease. Cos I'm not a twat.

But I will oblige if YMCA came on!

I can't whistle a tune. But I have noticed that three of my colleagues in the office also can't but that doesn't seem to stop them from their incessant attempts.

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

Can’t seem to get off the couch today

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By *.D.I.D.A.S OP   Man
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"Can’t seem to get off the couch today "

I'm still in bed. I think you win today.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wink.

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By *ornyhappyCouple
over a year ago

perth

I can't ride a bike.

I can't do sit ups.

Over the years I've attempted to learn to play guitar several times but I have failed.

K

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My bike riding skills suck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Raise one eyebrow or roll my eyes all the way back.

Now I'll never be The Rock or The Undertaker

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By *rimKardashianMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Confidently walk through 'Nothing To Declare' at the airport without feeling guilty.

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By *.R.MMan
over a year ago

Norfolk

Roller skate!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My bike riding skills suck."

I can't ride a bike and at my age, I feel too self conscious to try and learn

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wallpapering

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

I can't do press ups, I never have been able to, even in my peak athletic youth

C

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Kneel.... My calves are to shapely plus I tore my acl playing 5 a side football at uni and it never healed right.

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By *r usefull20Man
over a year ago

Devizes

Hello mrs slowcum

I’d love to say hello

And for you to use you riding

Crop on me

When your in on barge

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine


"Cook rice. "
Buy a rice cooker.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

DIY

I just hate all of it - it makes me cry every time with frustration!

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By *riday10Man
over a year ago

hertfordshire


"DIY

I just hate all of it - it makes me cry every time with frustration!"

Your not alone there. The curse of flat packs is real

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Whistle. I just can't do it.

Mrs

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London


"Cook rice. "

It's easy if you follow instructions.

Or get a rice cooker

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

Can't and never have been able to do the splits.

I think I have a collagen deficiency because I don't stretch .

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Ride a bike or swim

I have a condition called dispraxia which makes it very difficult for me to do things that require coordination "

Have so much fun teaching dispraxics running, swimming & cycling. Seriously, the rewards are something money cannot buy..

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"My bike riding skills suck.

I can't ride a bike and at my age, I feel too self conscious to try and learn "

...mostly teach adults, again great when they get it & confidently cycle away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't roll my Rrrrs

I can't drink wine, it all tastes like vinegar

I can't bake

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Roller or ice skate, I'm like Bambi on my arse constantly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My bike riding skills suck.

I can't ride a bike and at my age, I feel too self conscious to try and learn

...mostly teach adults, again great when they get it & confidently cycle away."

Are there actually places that teach adults to cycle? It's something I've always felt a bit inadequate about and would definitely like to learn

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

I’ve said it before on here. I can’t make gravy from granules without it having bits in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't...

Whistle

Click my fingers

Measure out a normal sized portion of rice or pasta. I always seem to cook enough for a small village!

Do a roly poly or handstand

Step onto descending escalators easily

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and put a screen protector on my phone without leaving a thousand bubbles

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I can't click my fingers.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

Let it lie.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Say "library" without sounding like a toddler

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Cook rice. "

Oh I know, it always comes out a watery mess lol

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Butter bread. Always end up shredding it to bits!

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By *eorge JetsonMan
over a year ago

Middlesbrough


"can't tell the time only digital

can't do imperial, i'm totally metric, so when a guy says 9inches I've not a scooby doo

can't to lighters

can't to leap frog, can't see me starting that one

but

can seem to fuck a guy and wank him at the same time!!! "

Well unfortunately I can't really assist with most of that BUT I can accurately clarify that 9 inches converts to 22.86cm.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"DIY

I just hate all of it - it makes me cry every time with frustration!

Your not alone there. The curse of flat packs is real "

Flat pack is evil

Everything I've ever assembled is wobbly and rubbish

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I can't seem to do much without falling over in some way.

Can't poach eggs.

Can't stop thinking about sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think of an answer to this thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fart without laughing

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"My bike riding skills suck.

I can't ride a bike and at my age, I feel too self conscious to try and learn

...mostly teach adults, again great when they get it & confidently cycle away.

Are there actually places that teach adults to cycle? It's something I've always felt a bit inadequate about and would definitely like to learn "

Indeed there are, check out your local council, they may have schemes.

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By *oxyVikingCouple
over a year ago

East Anglia

[Removed by poster at 07/02/21 17:52:43]

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"I can't roll my Rrrrs

I can't drink wine, it all tastes like vinegar

I can't bake

"

Oh yes cider...from cheap rot gut to expensive cru, second mouthful...turns to vinegar.

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By *oxyVikingCouple
over a year ago

East Anglia

Cook the right amount of rice, always cook enough to feed an army.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't whistle using my fingers. I wish I could.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't wink with my right eye without gurning

I can't whistle with my fingers in my mouth.

Her x

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"My bike riding skills suck.

I can't ride a bike and at my age, I feel too self conscious to try and learn

...mostly teach adults, again great when they get it & confidently cycle away.

Are there actually places that teach adults to cycle? It's something I've always felt a bit inadequate about and would definitely like to learn

Indeed there are, check out your local council, they may have schemes."

I tried two years ago, contacted the local council as I saw a sign at a local medical centre offering adult lessons. Rang them and they said I was too old plus there was a 3 year waiting list....but wait there was a group 30 miles away so they asked me to cycle there to learn how to cycle....erm!!!!

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By *imis3Woman
over a year ago

Dublin

Sleep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't say "fruit puree".

It always comes out "fooot pruree"

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"My bike riding skills suck.

I can't ride a bike and at my age, I feel too self conscious to try and learn

...mostly teach adults, again great when they get it & confidently cycle away.

Are there actually places that teach adults to cycle? It's something I've always felt a bit inadequate about and would definitely like to learn

Indeed there are, check out your local council, they may have schemes.

I tried two years ago, contacted the local council as I saw a sign at a local medical centre offering adult lessons. Rang them and they said I was too old plus there was a 3 year waiting list....but wait there was a group 30 miles away so they asked me to cycle there to learn how to cycle....erm!!!! "

Too old? We had a day in a park where we taught a 4 year old and a 74 year old to ride . With government money coming thru it might be worth checking again they should be better than that.

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

Ride a bike.

Dive into a pool

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By *OHN AND ALEXCouple (MM)
over a year ago

kildare

Wanking in the bath,no matter what I think of or how horny I am I just can't seem to finish the job. I could be tugging away till the cows come home (water would be freezing) and I just lose interest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Embroidery art though I'm trying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Cook rice. "

SAAAAAAAME!!!! What’s wrong with us?! Mine always ends up like a thick, soggy, wet brick.

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine

Life without my rice cooker, it realy makes cooking rice simple, how do you people live.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Life without my rice cooker, it realy makes cooking rice simple, how do you people live. "

I eat brown rice. It isn’t as temperamental.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

Wink. I have tried multiple times much to the amusement of my partners, my mouth does this weird thing where it turns up and my eye looks like it is twitching. I want to be one of those women who can lick her lips seductively and give a lascivious wink of promise to a man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tie a shoelace properly

Thankfully, I'm getting to that age where velcro'd footwear is acceptable again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't click my fingers or do the whistle with fingers in the mouth thing. Ice skate/roller skate/skateboard

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By *iaisonseekerMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Sit down without exhaling long and loud

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whistle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ice skate or knit lol

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By *ucksguy2000Man
over a year ago

aylesbury

Can’t, swim, skateboard, rollerskate, bake, drink a yard of ale, not much use with metric measurements always refer to imperial. Sure there’s more but this will do for a start ??

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By *hilledGuerillaMan
over a year ago

In the monkey house

Walk past a toy with a “try me” button and not press it.

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

Whistle and ride a bike my husband has tried to teach me to do both but it’s a lost cause .

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By *picyrodMan
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Swimming miss it like sex

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By *urtyGentMan
over a year ago

eastleigh

I can’t help swearing when I drive. They just fall out of me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get up in the mornings

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By *OHN AND ALEXCouple (MM)
over a year ago

kildare

Wanking in the bath,no matter what I think of or how horny I am I just can't seem to finish the job. I could be tugging away till the cows come home (water would be freezing) and I just lose interest.

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Walk past a toy with a “try me” button and not press it. "

Cannot walk past an informational board without reading...learn something new every day...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Drive my car backwards

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By *inell1Man
over a year ago

Ipswich

Never been able to blow up a balloon

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Cant tell my left from my right

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Pull on fab

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By *ice and PeasCouple
over a year ago

West Midlands

Say "cinnamon" without getting my "m's" and my "n's" muddled

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By *rder66Man
over a year ago

Tatooine


"Drive my car backwards "
how do you rach the pedals if you sit backwards?

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By *ack69erMan
over a year ago

Beverley

Sing or dance as I'm tone deaf and have no sync with the music. It would also be good to cook food.......without burning it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Opening a pack of lidls crips. The bastards must silicon seal the packs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whistle with fingers lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do as I am told

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get up out of a chair without saying: “Owww, my f*kin’ knee!”

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