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What's the weirdest item you've ever inserted into one of your orifices?

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

As the title suggests. I'll go first: parsnip.

Mrs kf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Voluntarily or under interrogation for classified secrets?

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"Voluntarily or under interrogation for classified secrets? "

Either, or both!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Voluntarily or under interrogation for classified secrets?

Either, or both! "

I'll have to check the video playback. My memory is a little hazy.

I'll get back to you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I put a pea in my ear and it got stuck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Aubergine! Jeez who eats that stuff

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"Aubergine! Jeez who eats that stuff "

Good effort! Agreed, aubergines taste like a bag of mushy shite.

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"I put a pea in my ear and it got stuck"

How did you unstick it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ship in a bottle

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By *tephanjMan
over a year ago

Kettering

I once put a Brussel sprout in my mouth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A cinnamon tictac up my nose.

It stung like a bastard!

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"Ship in a bottle "

Did the wee ship sail out of the bottle?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Glass paper weight cone shaped.

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"A cinnamon tictac up my nose.

It stung like a bastard! "

Ouch!

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By *yrshireyoungguyMan
over a year ago

glasgow

This one time at band camp....

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"Glass paper weight cone shaped. "

Excellent choice! I do love a glass dildo but have never tried a paperweight...

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"This one time at band camp...."

Tuba?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I put a pea in my ear and it got stuck

How did you unstick it? "

Someone picked it out with a needle. At the time it was unpleasant x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Glass paper weight cone shaped.

Excellent choice! I do love a glass dildo but have never tried a paperweight... "

The weight makes it a challenge with positioning;-)

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"I put a pea in my ear and it got stuck

How did you unstick it?

Someone picked it out with a needle. At the time it was unpleasant x"

Oh, that does not sound fun! I can recommend a parsnip. Not in the ear though

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

A 6ft curtain pole

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


" "

You not playing, Gentleman Jay?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A 6ft curtain pole "

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"A 6ft curtain pole "

All six feet? Impressive!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wicksteed mk33 colonoscope

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby


"A 6ft curtain pole

All six feet? Impressive! "

Hahaaa nowhere near that much...it worked like a self powered fucking machine though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex bf x

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"My ex bf x"

BADOOM TSHHH

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My ex bf x

BADOOM TSHHH "

Is that his profile name or code for that's disgusting x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My ex bf x"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"A 6ft curtain pole

All six feet? Impressive!

Hahaaa nowhere near that much...it worked like a self powered fucking machine though "

Aah

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Oyster - who the fuck ever thought that was good idea???

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"Oyster - who the fuck ever thought that was good idea??? "

Which orifice, though, chunky?

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"Oyster - who the fuck ever thought that was good idea???

Which orifice, though, chunky? "

Put it this way - I'd rather stick one up my arse than eat one ever again.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

P.s. i love the undies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A swab

Every 3 months at least.

All in the name of good health.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Aubergine! Jeez who eats that stuff

Good effort! Agreed, aubergines taste like a bag of mushy shite. "

You’re over cooking them!

They’re lovely lightly grilled with olive oil & balsamic.

*possibly on the wrong forum, *

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