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"Could you send me a jar of love? But what is a feeling? Is it merely a physical sensation? Or is it something more? Are feelings only meant to be fleeting? Or do some last longer? Do they develop? Or do we think they develop when actually they merely die and are quickly replaced by another? And what do we mean by gut feeling? Is this actually a feeling or is it a survival mechanism? More importantly though, what do feelings mean to you? Are you susceptible to certain feelings more than others? Are there some feelings you wish you never had?" Sometimes i feel nothing. Just empty and emotionless. This is usually due to work and being so tired i just go through the motions. This time of year gets me down. I need the sun and daylight to bring me to life. | |||
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"There is a lot going on here for a Thursday. I hope to never feel love again....I know, I am a proper fun sponge " Surely you don't want to rule out all types of love? Do you mean romantic love (for want of a better phrase)? | |||
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"For the Buddhists, feelings are one of the central pillars of the self. For Kirk van Houten, less so "Do you think that Buddhists believe that their feelings define them to a large part? | |||
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"Sometimes i feel nothing. Just empty and emotionless. This is usually due to work and being so tired i just go through the motions. This time of year gets me down. I need the sun and daylight to bring me to life." Do you think emptiness is a feeling (however bleak that might be)? | |||
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"Estragon, you can have all my feelings. I'm sick of them. " Do you think that feelings are transferable? | |||
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"For the Buddhists, feelings are one of the central pillars of the self. For Kirk van Houten, less so
Do you think that Buddhists believe that their feelings define them to a large part? "Maybe but the impermanence of existence overrides everything anyway  | |||
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"Sometimes i feel nothing. Just empty and emotionless. This is usually due to work and being so tired i just go through the motions. This time of year gets me down. I need the sun and daylight to bring me to life. Do you think emptiness is a feeling (however bleak that might be)? " Yes it is and not a good feeling to have. Roll on summer. | |||
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"I think all feelings are fleeting because even when they evolve, it's still different from the first feeling you had. With regards to gut feelings, they may help and even if you try to weigh it up against the opposite thing to see what is best, you'll still have a bias towards your initial gut feeling "I think you're probably right when it comes to feelings being fleeting. I also think it's more than likely we have different feelings simultaneously. People do go against their gut feeling though don't they? People always say 'I wish I'd listened to my gut feeling' but do they only do this when they feel they've made the wrong decision? | |||
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"Estragon, you can have all my feelings. I'm sick of them. Do you think that feelings are transferable? " I think feelings are mirrorable. But not transferable. I wish they were. | |||
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"For the Buddhists, feelings are one of the central pillars of the self. For Kirk van Houten, less so
Do you think that Buddhists believe that their feelings define them to a large part?
Maybe but the impermanence of existence overrides everything anyway "I don't know anything about Buddhism but isn't that essentially a feeling of nihilism? That life is meaningless? | |||
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"They say anxiety is because we needed to stay vigilant to stay alive when we were Hunter gatherers, but now that we live in comfy surroundings we don’t need it anymore, but we are still anxious about things, that are often Irrational. Also why does music go places inside you that nothing else can, stirs the soul in a way, that nothing else can touch, you feel it, but it’s abstract, you can’t explain it. I’m terrible at explaining what I feel or mean, but I can pin point it in a song or a colour. If none of this makes sense and isn’t relevant to the thread my apologies, I’ve just woken up. " I think you make a good point though - a lot of feelings are designed to help us survive. Are some feelings redundant now? Or maybe more difficult to handle as modern society dictates we shouldn't react to them as we once did? | |||
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"Feelings are subjective and how we experience and interpret them will vary from person to person. Is how I feel joy the same as how you feel joy? Or love or anger etc? Many people probably don't know how to identify what they're feeling at least some of the time. I used to misinterpret boredom or ennui for despair. " I think that the kernel of a feeling is probably the same in all of us. I think we all react slightly differently to this though and that's quite often due to our past experiences. Some people feel really guilty about feeling a certain way don't they? I know that's happened to me on occasions. How do we react to that? Do we suppress our own feeling to save the feelings of others? It's a tough one. | |||
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"They say anxiety is because we needed to stay vigilant to stay alive when we were Hunter gatherers, but now that we live in comfy surroundings we don’t need it anymore, but we are still anxious about things, that are often Irrational. Also why does music go places inside you that nothing else can, stirs the soul in a way, that nothing else can touch, you feel it, but it’s abstract, you can’t explain it. I’m terrible at explaining what I feel or mean, but I can pin point it in a song or a colour. If none of this makes sense and isn’t relevant to the thread my apologies, I’ve just woken up. I think you make a good point though - a lot of feelings are designed to help us survive. Are some feelings redundant now? Or maybe more difficult to handle as modern society dictates we shouldn't react to them as we once did? " Why do people react differently to the same things, if we are made of the same stuff. One man’s cage is another man’s stage, it amazes me how different people are from person to person, someone could love heights and the other person terrified. | |||
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"I think all feelings are fleeting because even when they evolve, it's still different from the first feeling you had. With regards to gut feelings, they may help and even if you try to weigh it up against the opposite thing to see what is best, you'll still have a bias towards your initial gut feeling
I think you're probably right when it comes to feelings being fleeting. I also think it's more than likely we have different feelings simultaneously.
People do go against their gut feeling though don't they? People always say 'I wish I'd listened to my gut feeling' but do they only do this when they feel they've made the wrong decision? "To be honest, I think people use that as an excuse for why they failed at something as there's no guarantee their gut feeling would've worked any better. Plus, I think they must've had a good reason to go the opposite way to their gut feeling, or maybe the decision was out of their hands and they're looking for comfort in knowing they may have been right all along. | |||
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"As I understand it feelings begin as physical sensations when we are very young then develop into emotional responses and reactions as we grow and our brain becomes more complex. This is why we can have a very strong physical response to an emotional state, also why these reactions are so hard to control. But if we block out these feelings altogether it’s likely we will experience a negative reaction elsewhere, physical or emotional. Better to recognise our own feelings and try to learn from experience how to manage and control them, or just embrace them. Can’t send a jar of love. Will peanut butter do ?" So I guess on one hand we've got the feeling and on the other we've got an immediate reaction to that to how we feel we should react to that feeling (ie how we've been conditioned over the years to act on that feeling). I remember being at a football match when I was a child and jumping up and down when my team scored. I was with my Dad and he told me that it wasn't the done thing to react like that and it's stuck with me. I rarely celebrate now when watching football. That's stuck with me. | |||
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" Why do people react differently to the same things, if we are made of the same stuff. One man’s cage is another man’s stage, it amazes me how different people are from person to person, someone could love heights and the other person terrified. " Because, I think, even our genetic, evolutionary instincts are shaped and altered by our first few years of childhood development, most of which we won’t properly remember. | |||
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"If anyone knows how to safely dispose of a lot of anger I’d appreciate any tips. " If we're consumed by a feeling, then there must be an underlying reason for it somewhere. Why do you feel so angry? I often get angry at certain things that happen but I'm not sure it's the events I'm really angry at. | |||
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"If anyone knows how to safely dispose of a lot of anger I’d appreciate any tips. " As someone who has dealt with a lot of this in the past. And for me personally it was about letting go of it. Was whatever that was making me angry worth that energy. And it was bloody hard but that person didn't deserve that time spent on them. | |||
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"As I understand it feelings begin as physical sensations when we are very young then develop into emotional responses and reactions as we grow and our brain becomes more complex. This is why we can have a very strong physical response to an emotional state, also why these reactions are so hard to control. But if we block out these feelings altogether it’s likely we will experience a negative reaction elsewhere, physical or emotional. Better to recognise our own feelings and try to learn from experience how to manage and control them, or just embrace them. Can’t send a jar of love. Will peanut butter do ? So I guess on one hand we've got the feeling and on the other we've got an immediate reaction to that to how we feel we should react to that feeling (ie how we've been conditioned over the years to act on that feeling). I remember being at a football match when I was a child and jumping up and down when my team scored. I was with my Dad and he told me that it wasn't the done thing to react like that and it's stuck with me. I rarely celebrate now when watching football. That's stuck with me." Being taught to suppress natural physical reactions to emotions is sad but inevitable, unfortunately. Just look at the body language of young children compared to adults. I'm reminded of the Friends episode when Phoebe goes running with Monica and Rachel. | |||
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"If anyone knows how to safely dispose of a lot of anger I’d appreciate any tips. If we're consumed by a feeling, then there must be an underlying reason for it somewhere. Why do you feel so angry? I often get angry at certain things that happen but I'm not sure it's the events I'm really angry at. " loads of different feelings and often I wish I didn't, can't always control how you feel especially for someone, you can try hardest it's just sex but if you gain feelings how do you stop them feelings | |||
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"Oh my gosh so many questions and so many answers. Can you send a jar of love? No but I do believe you can send something to remind them that you love them. And that can make them feel good things. A feeling can be anything can't it? A memory of a loved one. Or standing listening to a male Voice choir and feeling the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Others you develop so I think there are feelings that develop and those that are sub concious. Gut instinct I believe is the ability to read your surroundings and to see patterns you've encountered previously, and I do think it's an old survival mechanism. I'm an emotional person, and that means I feel the very highs and the very lows. But I wouldn't want to change that. There is no one feeling I wouldn't have wanted to feel in the position I am in now. I've worked through all that and I'm a better person for it. What about you OP? What is you think about feelings?" Like anything, I think it all depends on what we view as feelings. It's such a simple word but can mean different things to different people. Take love for instance. A simple word but there are so many different kinds of love. That initial, lung bursting love you feel for someone in the early stages of a relationship. The more appreciative love you feel in a long term relationship. The love of a mother for her child. The love I feel for a hot dog when I really want a hot dog. Do we get better at managing our feelings as we get older? Do you think we get bored of some feelings as we get older? | |||
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"Is this about erections?  "It can be. How do you feel about erections? | |||
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"Oh my gosh so many questions and so many answers. Can you send a jar of love? No but I do believe you can send something to remind them that you love them. And that can make them feel good things. A feeling can be anything can't it? A memory of a loved one. Or standing listening to a male Voice choir and feeling the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Others you develop so I think there are feelings that develop and those that are sub concious. Gut instinct I believe is the ability to read your surroundings and to see patterns you've encountered previously, and I do think it's an old survival mechanism. I'm an emotional person, and that means I feel the very highs and the very lows. But I wouldn't want to change that. There is no one feeling I wouldn't have wanted to feel in the position I am in now. I've worked through all that and I'm a better person for it. What about you OP? What is you think about feelings? Like anything, I think it all depends on what we view as feelings. It's such a simple word but can mean different things to different people. Take love for instance. A simple word but there are so many different kinds of love. That initial, lung bursting love you feel for someone in the early stages of a relationship. The more appreciative love you feel in a long term relationship. The love of a mother for her child. The love I feel for a hot dog when I really want a hot dog. Do we get better at managing our feelings as we get older? Do you think we get bored of some feelings as we get older? " i think sone people tend to manage there feelings better as they get older to protect themselves yes | |||
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"Oh my gosh so many questions and so many answers. Can you send a jar of love? No but I do believe you can send something to remind them that you love them. And that can make them feel good things. A feeling can be anything can't it? A memory of a loved one. Or standing listening to a male Voice choir and feeling the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Others you develop so I think there are feelings that develop and those that are sub concious. Gut instinct I believe is the ability to read your surroundings and to see patterns you've encountered previously, and I do think it's an old survival mechanism. I'm an emotional person, and that means I feel the very highs and the very lows. But I wouldn't want to change that. There is no one feeling I wouldn't have wanted to feel in the position I am in now. I've worked through all that and I'm a better person for it. What about you OP? What is you think about feelings? Like anything, I think it all depends on what we view as feelings. It's such a simple word but can mean different things to different people. Take love for instance. A simple word but there are so many different kinds of love. That initial, lung bursting love you feel for someone in the early stages of a relationship. The more appreciative love you feel in a long term relationship. The love of a mother for her child. The love I feel for a hot dog when I really want a hot dog. Do we get better at managing our feelings as we get older? Do you think we get bored of some feelings as we get older? " I've definitely matured with how I deal with my feelings as I've gotten older. I'm a lot more adept at explaining to others how I feel when I am struggling with them. But feelings to me a good and bad things, I can't imagine not feeling anything and to me that would be sad. I never get bored of things there's a joy to be found in the most mundane things, it's a lack of desire to see it that's the problem. I hope I never become jaded with feelings or learning come to that. | |||
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"Is this about erections?
It can be. How do you feel about erections? "It's hard to answer that  | |||
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"Is this about erections?
It can be. How do you feel about erections?
It's hard to answer that " I bet it is  | |||
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"Thanks to those who responded to what I had written. I’m having a hard time going through a divorce and it’s hard not to be angry. " Sorry to hear that HG. I imagine you have a whole range of feelings at the moment and it must be difficult to make sense of them all. Hopefully it'll get easier when the fog clears. | |||
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"This thread is very thought provoking op. Well done. Unfortunately having typed some stuff out for it and deleted more than once I can’t add anything of interest. I just wanted to show some appreciation for the feelings it’s stirred for me without sharing them." It’s like listening to ‘Sunshine on Leigh’ by The Proclaimers, it stirs the heart strings. | |||
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"This thread is very thought provoking op. Well done. Unfortunately having typed some stuff out for it and deleted more than once I can’t add anything of interest. I just wanted to show some appreciation for the feelings it’s stirred for me without sharing them. It’s like listening to ‘Sunshine on Leigh’ by The Proclaimers, it stirs the heart strings. " While the Chi, puts sunshine on Leigh. | |||
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"Feelings aren't merely physical sensations but they can create them - from that rising heat to your cheeks when you're embarrassed to the that sensation of your heart stopping when you feel immense grief of heartbreak. We definitely do learn how to, outwardly at least, make those instinctive responses more socially acceptable. It's a shame though, I love seeing the unadulterated glee of someone who air whoops, the unaffected displays of pure emotion. We should all start embracing our feelings more openly I think, stop being so reserved and show our joie de vivre. As far as my feelings go? I wouldn't change them for the world. Like in all areas of my life I don't half arse them - I'm either very happy or I'm not etc but I'd much rather have that capacity to feel than to not. I wouldn't be as irritatingly ebullient as I am most of the time if occasionally I didn't have a day of sad and recharging my batteries. I'm very much an open book on how I feel, whether that's about someone or not - I often tell my friends I love them because I do, I care deeply about people. Not to the point of penning them a sonnet a hour mind, I'm not that crazy. I'm more the refined haiku a week sort, I've managed to pick up some restraint." Thanks for your answer It was so good that I thought I'd write a haiku | |||
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"They say anxiety is because we needed to stay vigilant to stay alive when we were Hunter gatherers, but now that we live in comfy surroundings we don’t need it anymore, but we are still anxious about things, that are often Irrational. Also why does music go places inside you that nothing else can, stirs the soul in a way, that nothing else can touch, you feel it, but it’s abstract, you can’t explain it. I’m terrible at explaining what I feel or mean, but I can pin point it in a song or a colour. If none of this makes sense and isn’t relevant to the thread my apologies, I’ve just woken up. " Think you are spot on about music | |||
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"They're a bit of a pain in the arse these feelings. Easier to be a wooden head/heart. " Even Elvis didn't have a wooden heart. | |||
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"“More importantly though, what do feelings mean to you? Are you susceptible to certain feelings more than others? Are there some feelings you wish you never had?” I’ll answer this one... I get ALL the feelings. I’m a very emotional person and I feel things deeply (good and bad stuff). I think feelings are the building blocks of who we are or who we turn out to be. They influence our moods and our behaviour. There are none I wish I didn’t feel, although I can say that now without wearing a broken heart or feeling jealous pangs watching someone I like flirt with another. But even though I have loved and lost I still wouldn’t be without feeling that. It’s a beautiful feeling, it brings happiness, it makes us vulnerable and it changes us in some way. And for every good thing we experience in life we also have to be prepared for the bad things and they too leave their mark. " Excellent post | |||
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"Thanks to those who responded to what I had written. I’m having a hard time going through a divorce and it’s hard not to be angry. " Hang in there | |||
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"Think you are spot on about music" The music thing is interesting. I think anything that sparks our senses can stir all sorts of feelings. Smells, sights, sounds - they can all make us feel a certain way. | |||
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"Oh my gosh so many questions and so many answers. Can you send a jar of love? No but I do believe you can send something to remind them that you love them. And that can make them feel good things. A feeling can be anything can't it? A memory of a loved one. Or standing listening to a male Voice choir and feeling the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Others you develop so I think there are feelings that develop and those that are sub concious. Gut instinct I believe is the ability to read your surroundings and to see patterns you've encountered previously, and I do think it's an old survival mechanism. I'm an emotional person, and that means I feel the very highs and the very lows. But I wouldn't want to change that. There is no one feeling I wouldn't have wanted to feel in the position I am in now. I've worked through all that and I'm a better person for it. What about you OP? What is you think about feelings? Like anything, I think it all depends on what we view as feelings. It's such a simple word but can mean different things to different people. Take love for instance. A simple word but there are so many different kinds of love. That initial, lung bursting love you feel for someone in the early stages of a relationship. The more appreciative love you feel in a long term relationship. The love of a mother for her child. The love I feel for a hot dog when I really want a hot dog. Do we get better at managing our feelings as we get older? Do you think we get bored of some feelings as we get older? " I think maybe you are more aware of your feelings as you get older and maybe ask yourself why you feel a certain way. | |||
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"Think you are spot on about music The music thing is interesting. I think anything that sparks our senses can stir all sorts of feelings. Smells, sights, sounds - they can all make us feel a certain way. " In high fidelity nick hornby says music can take you back or it can give you hope looking forward | |||
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"They're a bit of a pain in the arse these feelings. Easier to be a wooden head/heart. Even Elvis didn't have a wooden heart. " I have the music in me now. | |||
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"Think you are spot on about music The music thing is interesting. I think anything that sparks our senses can stir all sorts of feelings. Smells, sights, sounds - they can all make us feel a certain way. " The French writer Proust wrote his multi volume classic ‘Remembrance of Things Past’ based on the emotions he had on tasting a particular biscuit which triggered a huge flood of childhood and adult memories. One of the great writers on feelings and memory. | |||
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Such an emotional wreck due to various things | |||
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"A primitive throwback, stemming from a need to find a mate - stay safe and pro create. A release of chemicals in the brain to give euphoric feelings" Yes but about their effect on the soul? On our psyche? Most creatures have these primitive reactions but surely human feelings are more complex and can't be dismissed as just chemicals in our brain? | |||
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"A primitive throwback, stemming from a need to find a mate - stay safe and pro create. A release of chemicals in the brain to give euphoric feelings Yes but about their effect on the soul? On our psyche? Most creatures have these primitive reactions but surely human feelings are more complex and can't be dismissed as just chemicals in our brain?" At base level it is a chemical reaction but you are right it is very complex thing and people will feel it in different ways depending on personality and life experiences, and your response to relationships can determined by the attachment style had with your own Parent/family.... | |||
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I think feelings are part of what makes us human. Some are fleeting, yes, but some are much longer lasting. Some evolve over time.
Gut feeling? I think that's just a really obvious feeling. Some can be harder to define or admit to.
I do like the idea of a jar of love, though 
Mrs kf x | |||
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C | |||
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"Wasn't that Milhouse's dad, Kirk, in The Simpsons?" He sang that song in the simpsons. | |||
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"I was a practicing Buddhist for many years and in answer to that thought, I'd say that feelings are a consequence of our interpretation of cause and effect. " This is interesting. When we encounter a situation, do you think we process all this information almost immediately which then manifests itself as a feeling that we then react to? What governs how we react to it? Our past experiences? Or many other things? | |||
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"I was a practicing Buddhist for many years and in answer to that thought, I'd say that feelings are a consequence of our interpretation of cause and effect. This is interesting. When we encounter a situation, do you think we process all this information almost immediately which then manifests itself as a feeling that we then react to? What governs how we react to it? Our past experiences? Or many other things? " In essence, yes - and so quickly that we may never truly know what first initiated our response. Many factors affect our state - environment, beliefs, values, experiences, wants, needs... | |||
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