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Fear after lockdown

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By *entlecaress OP   Man
over a year ago

Wakefield/ Beverley

Just wondering how many of us will be fearful once this horrid thing ends. It will be wierd just touching another person outside your bubble with maybe a hesitancy in doing it.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"Just wondering how many of us will be fearful once this horrid thing ends. It will be wierd just touching another person outside your bubble with maybe a hesitancy in doing it."

That is a really good point, OP. For me it will be some time before I consider touching anybody outside my trusted network - rather than when "we are allowed to do so". Not so much because it feels weird but more because I do not fully trust the safety, it has been a long time and ultimately we will still have the virus around with some people likely to carry it asymptomatically .

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm sure there will be significant psychological issues that a lot of us will need to work through.

We'll get through this.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I think a lot of us will find certain things difficult. I can't imagine being in a crowded space or sitting next to a stranger or touching a surface without washing or sanitising my hands.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I think a lot of us will find certain things difficult. I can't imagine being in a crowded space or sitting next to a stranger or touching a surface without washing or sanitising my hands.

"

I occasionally see footage of pre Covid, people standing close together, and go Much more if they cough.

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By *uzz And WoodyCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone

It will be very strange readjusting to hugging or kissing people when we greet them let alone anything more intimate. I’m sure there will be some people who would prefer to keep things as they are but I hope we can all become more tactile again.

Lou x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m preparing my mind for who I’d like to touch

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I've had to tell my parents that they don't need to wear masks when they're alone together, just when mums carers or I'm there. Since her most recent stay in hospital where obviously they're very careful, mum's been hyper vigilant, handing over a shopping list is quite a palava nowadays

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know a lot of people will have a fear once rona gets lost and understandably so however I’m going to run out there and hug and kiss everyone I know, I’ve missed it sooooo much so I’m not going to prolong the pain, longing or sadness any second more

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I'm working on my fear as I go. Front load the work, hopefully minimise any trauma.

It's real now. It won't be real forever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not fearful at all and I won't find anything at all weird about integrating with a larger community again.

I can't wait to hug strangers and I can't wait to be jammed into a room watching a live gig.

I can't wait to be able to walk down a footpath normally without having to stick to one side.

I can't wait to take my mask off and see people's faces again.

And most of all - I can't wait for everybodies FEAR to evaporate.

People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this.

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By *bsinthe_boyMan
over a year ago

Luton

When I returned to work in September, even with social distancing, it took me a week to adjust to being in any way around people.

On my first day back I saw someone I recognised on the commuter train. She waved hello and I almost cried.

It's going to take time. I used to host socials with up to 70 people attending. I cannot imagine that right now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it will take a while to feel completely at ease, I imagine there will be hangovers from it for a long time. I hope kids, who have less memory of other people and the world not being so dangerous, aren't left with social anxieties or issues from this. They're resilient wee things so fingers crossed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Time is a healer.

We'll get there, but it'll take time.

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By *tephanjMan
over a year ago

Kettering

Untill everyone gets the jab I think we all maybe a little worried

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I think it will take a while to feel completely at ease, I imagine there will be hangovers from it for a long time. I hope kids, who have less memory of other people and the world not being so dangerous, aren't left with social anxieties or issues from this. They're resilient wee things so fingers crossed. "

I don't know if this will make you feel better, but I'll try anyway.

One of my earliest memories is TV footage of the First Gulf War. I was in preschool.

My parents found out that I remember this in the last few years. My mum was devastated. They'd tried hard to shield me from that. It was too much, the type of footage was new, they didn't think I should see it.

I have no emotional attachment: it's sort of weird flashing lights, which I realise, reconstructing it as an adult must have been bombs shown through night vision. I'm not scarred by that.

I don't have kids myself, I know there is research on preventing or mitigating trauma in children. But, for what it's worth, my parents' fear (albeit about an event on a very different scale in my young life) was unfounded.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm hoping it's like riding a bicycle.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I'm hoping it's like riding a bicycle.

"

If it is I've been doing it wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Watching the telebox last night and the actors hugged and I thought how strange, then I thought well that was precovid.

We quickly change, no need to think when we can get back to normal that it's going to be difficult, maybe on the whole we may end up being nicer to each other in general.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it will take a while to feel completely at ease, I imagine there will be hangovers from it for a long time. I hope kids, who have less memory of other people and the world not being so dangerous, aren't left with social anxieties or issues from this. They're resilient wee things so fingers crossed.

I don't know if this will make you feel better, but I'll try anyway.

One of my earliest memories is TV footage of the First Gulf War. I was in preschool.

My parents found out that I remember this in the last few years. My mum was devastated. They'd tried hard to shield me from that. It was too much, the type of footage was new, they didn't think I should see it.

I have no emotional attachment: it's sort of weird flashing lights, which I realise, reconstructing it as an adult must have been bombs shown through night vision. I'm not scarred by that.

I don't have kids myself, I know there is research on preventing or mitigating trauma in children. But, for what it's worth, my parents' fear (albeit about an event on a very different scale in my young life) was unfounded."

Yeah you've very little control over which memories, which can seem totally insignificant at the time, will stick. Just having spent 24/7 with your parents though might have been lovely for some young kids, so there could be issues with attachment. I know I'm even dreading the day I have to go back to an office and try to get my velcro dog to adjust, never mind children.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not fearful at all and I won't find anything at all weird about integrating with a larger community again.

I can't wait to hug strangers and I can't wait to be jammed into a room watching a live gig.

I can't wait to be able to walk down a footpath normally without having to stick to one side.

I can't wait to take my mask off and see people's faces again.

And most of all - I can't wait for everybodies FEAR to evaporate.

People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this."

Absolutely right, the sainest post I've read for the past 10 months. This is not life at all its just existing and we're about to lose another year of our lives by just existing.

Politicians making money with interests in pharma companies and pushing fear at the same time. Media pushing fear 24/7 and children now becoming the lost uneducated generation.

Does anyone remember the same fear being pushed for Aids???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not fearful at all and I won't find anything at all weird about integrating with a larger community again.

I can't wait to hug strangers and I can't wait to be jammed into a room watching a live gig.

I can't wait to be able to walk down a footpath normally without having to stick to one side.

I can't wait to take my mask off and see people's faces again.

And most of all - I can't wait for everybodies FEAR to evaporate.

People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think us adults will recover just fine. It may take a while to adjust, but as we were brought up to enjoy physical contact we will get there in the end. Small children, however, who have spent a significant portion of their lives not touching anyone other than their parents and siblings will have more difficulty. Being told daily for the best part of a year, if not longer, to stay away from others and not make physical contact under any circumstances will have a developmental impact.

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By *uzz And WoodyCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone


"I'm not fearful at all and I won't find anything at all weird about integrating with a larger community again.

I can't wait to hug strangers and I can't wait to be jammed into a room watching a live gig.

I can't wait to be able to walk down a footpath normally without having to stick to one side.

I can't wait to take my mask off and see people's faces again.

And most of all - I can't wait for everybodies FEAR to evaporate.

People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this.

Absolutely right, the sainest post I've read for the past 10 months. This is not life at all its just existing and we're about to lose another year of our lives by just existing.

Politicians making money with interests in pharma companies and pushing fear at the same time. Media pushing fear 24/7 and children now becoming the lost uneducated generation.

Does anyone remember the same fear being pushed for Aids???

"

Could you catch AIDS at school or in the supermarket without any intimate contact? Would my parents get AIDS if I gave them a kiss on the cheek?

Maybe it’s not the current generation of kids who are uneducated.

And for the record, kids are still being educated and most have had the opportunity for remote learning since the start of the first lockdown (and they’ve been in school in between). The opportunity to learn may be different but it’s still available. And your greatest teacher will always be your parents.

And I’m not living in fear, I’m just living carefully and considerate of others.

Lou x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it will take a while to feel completely at ease, I imagine there will be hangovers from it for a long time. I hope kids, who have less memory of other people and the world not being so dangerous, aren't left with social anxieties or issues from this. They're resilient wee things so fingers crossed.

I don't know if this will make you feel better, but I'll try anyway.

One of my earliest memories is TV footage of the First Gulf War. I was in preschool.

My parents found out that I remember this in the last few years. My mum was devastated. They'd tried hard to shield me from that. It was too much, the type of footage was new, they didn't think I should see it.

I have no emotional attachment: it's sort of weird flashing lights, which I realise, reconstructing it as an adult must have been bombs shown through night vision. I'm not scarred by that.

I don't have kids myself, I know there is research on preventing or mitigating trauma in children. But, for what it's worth, my parents' fear (albeit about an event on a very different scale in my young life) was unfounded."

A one-off event is more easily overcome than constant daily reminders to keep away from other people. For a 3 year old that's a third of their life keeping their hands to themselves for fear of getting ill.

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By *uzz And WoodyCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone


"I think it will take a while to feel completely at ease, I imagine there will be hangovers from it for a long time. I hope kids, who have less memory of other people and the world not being so dangerous, aren't left with social anxieties or issues from this. They're resilient wee things so fingers crossed.

I don't know if this will make you feel better, but I'll try anyway.

One of my earliest memories is TV footage of the First Gulf War. I was in preschool.

My parents found out that I remember this in the last few years. My mum was devastated. They'd tried hard to shield me from that. It was too much, the type of footage was new, they didn't think I should see it.

I have no emotional attachment: it's sort of weird flashing lights, which I realise, reconstructing it as an adult must have been bombs shown through night vision. I'm not scarred by that.

I don't have kids myself, I know there is research on preventing or mitigating trauma in children. But, for what it's worth, my parents' fear (albeit about an event on a very different scale in my young life) was unfounded.

A one-off event is more easily overcome than constant daily reminders to keep away from other people. For a 3 year old that's a third of their life keeping their hands to themselves for fear of getting ill. "

Most young children are very resilient and they will only be as anxious as those around them so us adults need to be very mindful of what we say and do around them. And switch off the news and topical tv programmes, let them play and watch kids programmes.

And keeping yourself clean and not touching others uninvited aren’t bad lessons for them to learn.

Lou x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been having dreams of being in a crowded place and having to remind people to social distance.

Not sure how long it will take for those dreams to stop when things are back to normal

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By *ickz2014Man
over a year ago

maidstone

Let's all be honest this way of life is going nowhere!!! The next mutation is already on the way!! Think we should all get on and live our lives

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

?


"I'm not fearful at all and I won't find anything at all weird about integrating with a larger community again.

I can't wait to hug strangers and I can't wait to be jammed into a room watching a live gig.

I can't wait to be able to walk down a footpath normally without having to stick to one side.

I can't wait to take my mask off and see people's faces again.

And most of all - I can't wait for everybodies FEAR to evaporate.

People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this."

Precisely this. We're social creatures, and for me this lack of interaction and being tactile is torture...I will be hugging and kissing everyone I know as soon as I possibly can.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people will be hesitant to get too close/hug/shake hands etc because we’ve had almost a year of being conditioned to not.

Sometimes I watch people on tv and cringe, until I think about it!

However, I cannot wait to be able to hug people and go out again, we will adjust, it’ll just take time.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"I think us adults will recover just fine. It may take a while to adjust, but as we were brought up to enjoy physical contact we will get there in the end. Small children, however, who have spent a significant portion of their lives not touching anyone other than their parents and siblings will have more difficulty. Being told daily for the best part of a year, if not longer, to stay away from others and not make physical contact under any circumstances will have a developmental impact. "

I agree.

And to say "shield them from the worry of Corona" is somewhat naive when it is mentioned on tv, radio, newspapers, posters, every train or bus journey, evey shop announcement,everywhere you go.

Yes kids are resilient and hopefully most will come through unscathed but a significant proportion of kids (and adults) will have mental health issues of varying degrees after living through these times.

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By *bsinthe_boyMan
over a year ago

Luton


"Let's all be honest this way of life is going nowhere!!! The next mutation is already on the way!! Think we should all get on and live our lives "

You clearly have not even the most basic understanding of what's happening.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I think it will take a while to feel completely at ease, I imagine there will be hangovers from it for a long time. I hope kids, who have less memory of other people and the world not being so dangerous, aren't left with social anxieties or issues from this. They're resilient wee things so fingers crossed.

I don't know if this will make you feel better, but I'll try anyway.

One of my earliest memories is TV footage of the First Gulf War. I was in preschool.

My parents found out that I remember this in the last few years. My mum was devastated. They'd tried hard to shield me from that. It was too much, the type of footage was new, they didn't think I should see it.

I have no emotional attachment: it's sort of weird flashing lights, which I realise, reconstructing it as an adult must have been bombs shown through night vision. I'm not scarred by that.

I don't have kids myself, I know there is research on preventing or mitigating trauma in children. But, for what it's worth, my parents' fear (albeit about an event on a very different scale in my young life) was unfounded.

A one-off event is more easily overcome than constant daily reminders to keep away from other people. For a 3 year old that's a third of their life keeping their hands to themselves for fear of getting ill. "

I know. It's a poor analogy, but it's all I've got.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cant say its changed for me a great deal apart from not being able to jump on a plane to cyprus (which i try and do monthly) and going to my local avery other night.

I live rurally keep myself to myself so in all honesty dont have any fears

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a lot of us will find certain things difficult. I can't imagine being in a crowded space or sitting next to a stranger or touching a surface without washing or sanitising my hands.

I occasionally see footage of pre Covid, people standing close together, and go Much more if they cough.

"

I do this and if they touch a surface outside and don't sanitise

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

I think I will still be very cautious for a while, even though by nature I'm extremely tactile. I can't wait to be able to hug my friends and my family, but that's because I know and trust them. When it comes to strangers I'm not so sure I'll be comfortable for a good long while.

I don't like the idea of crowded places right now, and I will probably wear a mask on public transport long after it ceases to be mandated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't wait to be able to hug my mum and the rest of my family again and I'll be over there like a shot as soon as allowed but as for close contact with others, not antibacing every surface in sight or sanitising my hands constantly, I think that will take longer to disapte. I'm currently too scared to leave my front door most days. All of this is going to have a long term affect to some degree maybe not on everyone but it will on some.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I can't wait to be able to hug my mum and the rest of my family again and I'll be over there like a shot as soon as allowed but as for close contact with others, not antibacing every surface in sight or sanitising my hands constantly, I think that will take longer to disapte. I'm currently too scared to leave my front door most days. All of this is going to have a long term affect to some degree maybe not on everyone but it will on some. "

It's a global trauma. It'll take time and mutual compassion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can't wait to be able to hug my mum and the rest of my family again and I'll be over there like a shot as soon as allowed but as for close contact with others, not antibacing every surface in sight or sanitising my hands constantly, I think that will take longer to disapte. I'm currently too scared to leave my front door most days. All of this is going to have a long term affect to some degree maybe not on everyone but it will on some.

It's a global trauma. It'll take time and mutual compassion."

It will although compassion in general is not always that easy to come by. It'll be interesting to see how many truly understand and care once they get their freedom back given how many already deny mental health problems and invisible illnesses.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I can't wait to be able to hug my mum and the rest of my family again and I'll be over there like a shot as soon as allowed but as for close contact with others, not antibacing every surface in sight or sanitising my hands constantly, I think that will take longer to disapte. I'm currently too scared to leave my front door most days. All of this is going to have a long term affect to some degree maybe not on everyone but it will on some.

It's a global trauma. It'll take time and mutual compassion.

It will although compassion in general is not always that easy to come by. It'll be interesting to see how many truly understand and care once they get their freedom back given how many already deny mental health problems and invisible illnesses. "

I agree. Their suffering seems to be more important for reasons I can't fathom.

I think this will have psychological consequences for everyone. I stand with everyone who's willing to stand with everyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can't wait to be able to hug my mum and the rest of my family again and I'll be over there like a shot as soon as allowed but as for close contact with others, not antibacing every surface in sight or sanitising my hands constantly, I think that will take longer to disapte. I'm currently too scared to leave my front door most days. All of this is going to have a long term affect to some degree maybe not on everyone but it will on some.

It's a global trauma. It'll take time and mutual compassion.

It will although compassion in general is not always that easy to come by. It'll be interesting to see how many truly understand and care once they get their freedom back given how many already deny mental health problems and invisible illnesses.

I agree. Their suffering seems to be more important for reasons I can't fathom.

I think this will have psychological consequences for everyone. I stand with everyone who's willing to stand with everyone."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can't wait to be able to hug my mum and the rest of my family again and I'll be over there like a shot as soon as allowed but as for close contact with others, not antibacing every surface in sight or sanitising my hands constantly, I think that will take longer to disapte. I'm currently too scared to leave my front door most days. All of this is going to have a long term affect to some degree maybe not on everyone but it will on some.

It's a global trauma. It'll take time and mutual compassion.

It will although compassion in general is not always that easy to come by. It'll be interesting to see how many truly understand and care once they get their freedom back given how many already deny mental health problems and invisible illnesses.

I agree. Their suffering seems to be more important for reasons I can't fathom.

I think this will have psychological consequences for everyone. I stand with everyone who's willing to stand with everyone."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this."

Good man yourself!

I agree. This isn't a new normal, it's frankly natural. We are trying to condition ourselves against our basic instincts. On that basis alone it's doomed to failure.

But "new normal" when we are out of this? We will never be fully out, but when we get to a government defined level of acceptable risk, things will be different. How you lived through 2019 is history. Expect changes in all walks of life, from how things are designed built and used, through to what we wear and how we interact with others. In a way, its just social evolution. Not that long ago everyone wore a hat. The mask will be the new hat.

Thing is, risk is present in every aspect of life. It's not so much the risk, but how we all react differently to the same risk. For me, when you fear living, you might as well be dead.

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove

I don't perceive I will feel any differently. Apart from my working conditions, my life hasn't altered that much, and I adapt very easily and don't overthink things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I reckon I'll slip quite easily back into life as it starts to return to normality

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will only be meeting certain friends after covid to be on the safe side but yes it is going to be strange

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If there are no new cases, and we are in the clear, I will have no issues touching others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there are no new cases, and we are in the clear, I will have no issues touching others "

Chams visit then I'm guessing

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"I'm not fearful at all and I won't find anything at all weird about integrating with a larger community again.

I can't wait to hug strangers and I can't wait to be jammed into a room watching a live gig.

I can't wait to be able to walk down a footpath normally without having to stick to one side.

I can't wait to take my mask off and see people's faces again.

And most of all - I can't wait for everybodies FEAR to evaporate.

People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this.

Absolutely right, the sainest post I've read for the past 10 months. This is not life at all its just existing and we're about to lose another year of our lives by just existing.

Politicians making money with interests in pharma companies and pushing fear at the same time. Media pushing fear 24/7 and children now becoming the lost uneducated generation.

Does anyone remember the same fear being pushed for Aids???

Could you catch AIDS at school or in the supermarket without any intimate contact? Would my parents get AIDS if I gave them a kiss on the cheek?

Maybe it’s not the current generation of kids who are uneducated.

And for the record, kids are still being educated and most have had the opportunity for remote learning since the start of the first lockdown (and they’ve been in school in between). The opportunity to learn may be different but it’s still available. And your greatest teacher will always be your parents.

And I’m not living in fear, I’m just living carefully and considerate of others.

Lou x "

Could not have said it better myself.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"People have been referring to the past year as "the new normal"... nothing normal about it, it's fucked up and we're not supposed to live like this.

Good man yourself!

I agree. This isn't a new normal, it's frankly natural. We are trying to condition ourselves against our basic instincts. On that basis alone it's doomed to failure.

But "new normal" when we are out of this? We will never be fully out, but when we get to a government defined level of acceptable risk, things will be different. How you lived through 2019 is history. Expect changes in all walks of life, from how things are designed built and used, through to what we wear and how we interact with others. In a way, its just social evolution. Not that long ago everyone wore a hat. The mask will be the new hat.

Thing is, risk is present in every aspect of life. It's not so much the risk, but how we all react differently to the same risk. For me, when you fear living, you might as well be dead."

Well said. We will learn to live with new hats

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If there are no new cases, and we are in the clear, I will have no issues touching others

Chams visit then I'm guessing "

As soon as possible, for a whole weekend.

Me, on my todd, a hotel room in the club....bliss

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Last year I left the town I live in twice, normally it would be at least once a month. This Friday I have to go to Liverpool and I’m dreading it, it’s only a 30 minute train ride but I’m not used to doing that anymore or wondering if I’m going to be questioned about why I’m travelling.

I’m not an anxious person normally, happily mix with anyone at any venue, but even I am now starting to feel different about things I used to just take for granted.

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By *ohnny2006Man
over a year ago

worcester


"Just wondering how many of us will be fearful once this horrid thing ends. It will be wierd just touching another person outside your bubble with maybe a hesitancy in doing it."

What makes you think it is going to end? Governments NEVER give freedoms back. How do you think income tax on everyone started? WW1. Did they end it after the war did? Of course not. Look at 911? Did we get our freedoms back? No of course not.

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By *entlecaress OP   Man
over a year ago

Wakefield/ Beverley

As always a good cross section of views in our diverse community. I think I will still be hesitant interacting with others until at some point I will have to take the plunge possibly initially with people I already have a connection with. Take care all and keep safe until then.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was watching a film and saw someone blow candles out on a cake and then serve it to their guests

I was frankly shocked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just wondering how many of us will be fearful once this horrid thing ends. It will be wierd just touching another person outside your bubble with maybe a hesitancy in doing it.

What makes you think it is going to end? Governments NEVER give freedoms back. How do you think income tax on everyone started? WW1. Did they end it after the war did? Of course not. Look at 911? Did we get our freedoms back? No of course not.

"

What freedoms have you lost as a result of 911?

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