FabSwingers.com forum: Sanctimonious Couples....

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Getting a bit fed up with being treated like 'Swinging Pariah' at the moment.

Can someone (although I doubt it will be 'one') tell us why so many married couples on here seem to think that anything other than that does not constitute a couple and look down their web-based noses at us?

Perky and I ARE a genuine couple and have been for two years (we are old school friends) - we can't live together for some years mainly due to the schooling and support needs of Perky's severely disabled daughter.

Although we have been very lucky in the short time we have been on here in making new friends and getting meets, I am getting a bit sick and tired at the 'holier than thou' attitude we get from some 'marrieds'.

Had another one this morning which has 'stirred my inner self'........ and not in a nice way

Whaddya all think? Am I being paranoid? (has been known) or is there some kind of 'married clique' going on????

Over to the Fab Collective......

Ta.

Pork

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

nope. there are several couples on here who believe they are the swinging elite and fuck buddies, co-habiting people and the dreaded single person are not worthy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are so many couples of convenience about some people are wary to meet. It has never bothered us but know a few couples who explode over this and don't really know why they do it. You meet who you want to meet and if you dont then fair enough no need to be aggressive to couples who don't live together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd like to know why 'couples of convenience' are not regarded as couples to play with.

I understand not wanting to meet with those who may be married but not to each other, as that could be seen as condoning cheating.

But other couples may have a great understanding of what makes the other tick sexually and give a great meet experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

porperky, we know how you feel. we experienced this a little at the start. just remember you do not have to explain or justify your relationship to anyone.

we found plenty of great folks to play with who don't even question the relationship twix tiger n I.

marriage is after all only a bit of officialdom to register a committment. some of us don't need that or want it.

xxxxx chin up

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Clearly the 'not being married' and 'not living together' things were a big deal for them, specially as her wedding ring etc were rather prominent in all their pics.

Didn't like her response after explaining in a fair amount of detail about our situation and no mention in their profile that they prefer (or will only meet) other married couples.

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By *abloBackMan
over a year ago

London

Some people are plain nasty, the Internet gives them an opportunity to bully weaker people with very little redress.

I have met many of these people in real life and the apologies and explanations of their comments being misinterpreted are laughable. They will then go away and start flaming as soon as they return to their keyboards.

Ignore them, carry on enjoying what you do.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

It is just their preference, we all have them.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

We have had people from swinging sites tell us that we are not a proper committed couple. Why....because we are not married.Despite the fact we have been together since our school days!

So it's not just those who don't live together that get people pointing fingers at them.

Balls to them I say!

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"It is just their preference, we all have them.

Beat me to it View.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"porperky, we know how you feel. we experienced this a little at the start. just remember you do not have to explain or justify your relationship to anyone.

we found plenty of great folks to play with who don't even question the relationship twix tiger n I.

marriage is after all only a bit of officialdom to register a committment. some of us don't need that or want it.

xxxxx chin up "

Thanks for that xxx

I think it was more the way it was done (or the response) after taking the trouble to explain - and as you rightly say, why should we have to justify ourselves anyway?

As for a marriage certificate being just a bit of officialdom - Perky has done it twice and all it did was put her on happy pills for years!!! Fortunately I had the good sense to just live with my ex for 20yrs - Lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yep, I guess some folks are bit time warped and stuck in the "car keys" syndrome

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By *illow PimpMan
over a year ago

Midlothian

fucking a guy's bird, fuck buddy dosn't have the same appeal as fucking his wife

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Some people are plain nasty, the Internet gives them an opportunity to bully weaker people with very little redress.

Ignore them, carry on enjoying what you do. "

Don't worry - we will do Pablo..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some people are plain nasty, the Internet gives them an opportunity to bully weaker people with very little redress.

Ignore them, carry on enjoying what you do. "

Use the site as you want and within the rules, concern yourself not with the interpretations of others, do your own thing, and enjoy your leisure time

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mr Pork and Mrs Perky

What constitutes a 'couple' should be personal to you two and you two alone.

I have been in a relat for 17 years, yet have not shared a home with Mrs Bus for 12 of those years.

We have never married, we are both financially independent, we have seperate houses and to a degree seperate lives and we are happy for each other to explore avenues that other 'couples' would regard as unconventional.

Loads of friends were like 'what ?' when our relationship moulded into it's current form but have over the years simply grown used to it.

But ya know what, what we have works for us and that is all that matters.

Good Luck to ya both x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to be part of a couple on here we was not a couple in the romantic sense but most I chatted to were happier with that than meeting a married couple because of jealousy issues that have been encountered or perceived in previous meets. As a single girl I will not meet a couple as I am Fed up of messages from them implying I here for their needs alone like I living sex toy and yes thats a bit rich coming from me having tried being on here as a couple but I made effort then to make sure any third party felt fully involved and their needs were met but the couples messaging me before I blocked couples failed to do this and so now if I want a man and a woman to play with together I look for them as individuals making it know I looking for fmf.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Aww just ignore them!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Mr Pork and Mrs Perky

What constitutes a 'couple' should be personal to you two and you two alone.

I have been in a relat for 17 years, yet have not shared a home with Mrs Bus for 12 of those years.

Loads of friends were like 'what ?' when our relationship moulded into it's current form but have over the years simply grown used to it.

But ya know what, what we have works for us and that is all that matters.

Good Luck to ya both x"

x x x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Aww just ignore them!

xx"

We fully intend to

Just a pity sanctimonious crap isn't a grounds for reporting someone - cos I would have...

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

why is it sanctimonious

was it the way they wrote back and said No that has irked you?

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"Aww just ignore them!

We fully intend to

Just a pity sanctimonious crap isn't a grounds for reporting someone - cos I would have...

Yeah....reporting someone for having differing _iews on life than yourself......that'll work.

Whatever happened to moving on to another member/s who are compatible with ones self?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My guy and I are a couple we have been together for 18 months and are very happy and love each other to bits we don't live together through choice we live about 40 miles apart and spend as much time together as we can we also text and phone each other every single day sometimes up to 14 calls and numerous te ts a day but we are a couple and agree you have to explain all the time why you don't live together gets tiresome xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

so the couples who say No to unmarried, living together, swinging playmates are pretending to be devoted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My guy and I are a couple we have been together for 18 months and are very happy and love each other to bits we don't live together through choice we live about 40 miles apart and spend as much time together as we can we also text and phone each other every single day sometimes up to 14 calls and numerous te ts a day but we are a couple and agree you have to explain all the time why you don't live together gets tiresome xx"

It must be very frustrating and annoying that people are so anal about your situation. I would say is that if they can't accept your situation then they have issues and are probably best avoided anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

so the couples who say No to unmarried, living together, swinging playmates are pretending to be devoted"

where is the "spoon" smiley?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

so the couples who say No to unmarried, living together, swinging playmates are pretending to be devoted

where is the "spoon" smiley?"

what do you need that for?

I am asking why people's preference are questioned on this thread, yet on a million other threads people are told to respect preferences.

the couple themselves don't meet bi male couples, that is their choice and not be questioned.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Getting a bit fed up with being treated like 'Swinging Pariah' at the moment.

Had another one this morning which has 'stirred my inner self'........ and not in a nice way

Whaddya all think? Am I being paranoid? (has been known) or is there some kind of 'married clique' going on????

Over to the Fab Collective......

Ta.

Pork

My advice would to be just keep on keeping on and if someone for some bizarre reason becomes judgemental....just ignore them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

so the couples who say No to unmarried, living together, swinging playmates are pretending to be devoted

where is the "spoon" smiley?

what do you need that for?

I am asking why people's preference are questioned on this thread, yet on a million other threads people are told to respect preferences.

the couple themselves don't meet bi male couples, that is their choice and not be questioned."

all things may be questioned. the choice is surely whether you answer?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

so the couples who say No to unmarried, living together, swinging playmates are pretending to be devoted

where is the "spoon" smiley?

what do you need that for?

I am asking why people's preference are questioned on this thread, yet on a million other threads people are told to respect preferences.

the couple themselves don't meet bi male couples, that is their choice and not be questioned.

all things may be questioned. the choice is surely whether you answer?"

of course and we all do it. They asked for it to be discussed.

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By *bbandflowCouple
over a year ago

South Devon

"Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

so the couples who say No to unmarried, living together, swinging playmates are pretending to be devoted

where is the "spoon" smiley?

what do you need that for?

I am asking why people's preference are questioned on this thread, yet on a million other threads people are told to respect preferences.

the couple themselves don't meet bi male couples, that is their choice and not be questioned."

Obviously not privvy to OP's experiences, but if married couples are simply stating they don't meet unmarried couples..that's preference, and of course perfectly valid ..if OP has received overt criticism for their lifestyle..that's more than simple preference that's hurtful and unwarranted.

In saying that, I agree with other posts and just ignore.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Sanctimonious

Function: adjective

: pretending to be devoted

so the couples who say No to unmarried, living together, swinging playmates are pretending to be devoted

where is the "spoon" smiley?

what do you need that for?

I am asking why people's preference are questioned on this thread, yet on a million other threads people are told to respect preferences.

the couple themselves don't meet bi male couples, that is their choice and not be questioned.

In saying that, I agree with other posts and just ignore. "

and report if they are offensive.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

There is far better time to be spent arranging fun with people that you will connect with than worry about people that don't have an interest in you whatever the reason

I don't concern myself with what anyone else thinks about my relationship with my OH,we're comfortable and we have fun on here,other peoples _iews do not register with me,unless of course it is abusive and uneccessary opinion and not just a no thanks you're not what we're looking for

You're happy....stay happy and ignore those that feel they have a right to tell you how you should live your life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We tend not to meet people who dont live together because its harder for them to get their schedules together and actually organise a time to meet,, however,,, we don't completely rule them out because we have made some good friends through it. but i can see how some people short on time and patience might just rules them out!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We tend not to meet people who dont live together because its harder for them to get their schedules together and actually organise a time to meet,, however,,, we don't completely rule them out because we have made some good friends through it. but i can see how some people short on time and patience might just rules them out!"

Understand that, but we are fortunate in having very fixed dates and times when we can meet due to Perkys home situation. In this case, and what prompted me to post the original, it as nothing to do with that aspect of meeting couples who don't live under the same roof.... Hence the tone of my original post....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I said let me see ur ring...not that ring..bend over

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"I said let me see ur ring...not that ring..bend over"

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