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What daft things parents would say to you as a child???

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By *ENGUY OP   Man
over a year ago

Hull

Did your parents say the most utter stupid things to you when you were growing up through childhood? Like....

When naughty, they'd say "Do you want a slap or a spanking?" (did they expect you to say "Yes please!")

OR

"I'm going to make you laugh on the other side of your face!" (Ehhh?)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont come running to me when you break your leg......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you will clean this room by bedtime even if it takes you till tomorrow morning eh!!! wtf's all that about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When u ask something and they say I'll give u .......

example can I goto the pictures?

reply

i;ll give you bloody pictures

lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When his van plays that tune, he's run out of icecream...

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By *ayjay218Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

You will take your eye out with that or i will take my hand off your face (its going on that was the problem)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't stop crying I will give you something to cry for. X

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By *uttyMan
over a year ago

Local to you maybe


"If you don't stop crying I will give you something to cry for. X "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We'll see" used to piss me off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

youve all been watching an audience with billy lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

dnt stop crying or i will give u something to cry about!

stop playing with ur food!

if u dnt stop pulling a fce the wind will change direction and u will stay looking like that!

or if they smacked u they starting saying it in rythum of slap " dnt do it again" etc etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And then we repeat it all to our own kids

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"And then we repeat it all to our own kids "

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

I'm going to smack your backside til your nose bleeds buttermilk.....

You could swing on that pet lip (when sulking about something).......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when getting smacked, was told to stop crying..

er... yeah - think about that one - it hurts!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't stop picking your nose your brains will fall out

If you push your belly button in your bum will fall off

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By *rs and mr sanddancerCouple
over a year ago

Boldon

If your're not in bed by 10, come home - said to me at 16! I think my mum got it wrong somehow but I made sure I was in bed well before 10.... and then went home!

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By *riendlyfunfemWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own


"If you don't stop crying I will give you something to cry for. X "

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By *riendlyfunfemWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

When eating a sandwich I would always leave the 'crusts' and my mum would say " if you don't eat your crusts you'll never have curly hair". I had poker straight hair and as I didn't want curls I made sure I never ate them even when I wanted to!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If ye don't eat your meat how can ye have any pudding!

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By *ipgloss..Woman
over a year ago

Stourbridge

You dont have to eat the food now I've been shopping!!

.........Nah we'll just leave it and look at it mother

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when me mam had had enough of us lot she's say "Don't talk wi yer mouth open!.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mother's favourite was...

Maybe you do want to go out but... (insert excuse here!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My mother's favourite was...

Maybe you do want to go out but... (insert excuse here!)"

he he the old fashioned = of yeah but!

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

My Mum's was "Get out of my sight!" So I went off to my room. But she caught me moving the portable television into my room. Not my fault she came up the stairs and caught me in her sight I hasten to add!

I have threatened my little one with "dont make me count to 5!" I still have no idea whats going to happen after 5 though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

M is never going to repeat this with our boys:

M was 15 when his mother thrust one of his porn mags (she'd found it under his bed) under his nose and shouted "so what do you do with the like of this?" He answer was "are you serious?"

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

'Bike!!?...you want a bike?'

I'll fucking bike you m'boy'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look like nobody owns you!

Said when I was going out in my punk gear.

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

"Stop showing off" (said in front of your friends) *cringe*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the wind changes u will stay like that!! When pulling a face! Really?????? I used to pull the strangest faces to test the theory

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham


"If the wind changes u will stay like that!! When pulling a face! Really?????? I used to pull the strangest faces to test the theory "

So did it work? (ducks)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If the wind changes u will stay like that!! When pulling a face! Really?????? I used to pull the strangest faces to test the theory

So did it work? (ducks) "

Ummmmmmm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you break your leg doing that, dont come running to me!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't believe no one has mentioned..

"Wait till your father gets home!"

Never failed to scare the shit out of me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you don't stop laughing I will make you smile on the other side of your face"

"If you don't start enjoying yourself I will give you such a slap"

"Eat all your food there are starving children in China" (to which I replied once too often "Well give it to them then!")

..And what was all that about putting me to bed when I was wide awake and waking me up when I was fast asleep...??

...And all that spitting in a handkerchief and wiping your face ffs ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can't believe no one has mentioned..

"Wait till your father gets home!"

Never failed to scare the shit out of me."

I was going to say that but saw you had... And my Dad couldn't be arsed anyway.

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By *oddyWoman
over a year ago

between havant and chichester

you needent think your going out dressed like that go and change

if you dont eat that meal your have it for every meal till you do eat it

have you got clean knickers on in case you get run over by a bus

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By *ashful BazMan
over a year ago

poole dorset

Don't speak with your mouthful

Okay, you can have one, once there gone, there gone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"shut your mouth and eat your food"... this was invariably followed by a slap, because I them shoved the fork in the side of my face and said through clenched lips " I cant eat this way"

"did you do that", pointng at some misdemeanor... the answer was always "no", I usually blamed one of my other 4 siblings or the dog.

As small kids after a bath, we would lie on the towel and mum would "flour us for the oven".

My mum died a few weeks back and a lot of this stupid things that were said as a kid came flooding back

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By *ENGUY OP   Man
over a year ago

Hull


"I can't believe no one has mentioned..

"Wait till your father gets home!"

Never failed to scare the shit out of me."

In our house, it was....

"Wait till your mother gets home!"

Jeez, that waiting time till her arrival was hell!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stop being so childish!!!"

Errrm I was a child LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

have you got clean knickers on in case you get run over by a bus"

Good thing about swinging is you dont have to worry about putting knickers on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was about 18 I met my mum for a drink in my regular pub. She put her hand on my knee and in a load voice said "What would your mum say if she knew we were out together". I could've died.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we used to go for long walks I would complain that my legs hurt con they would say 'ah what's a matter have you got a bone in it?'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In response to the whingy "I'm boooored" line...

"Stand on your head and sing the alleluia chorus"

Backfired on her when we all did it!

We also did as we were told when she said "Hold your tongue for 5 minutes" We'd hold our tongues and count the seconds, nice and loud

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

You'll be laughing on the other side of your face in a minute..

If you sit on cold walls you'll get piles

You cant have anything to eat before you go swimming you'll get cramp

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