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Am I allowed to tell a British joke?

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London

Andy Murray came into my tennis club the other day. I said to him "Alright Andy, how do you fancy doubling up?" He said "Yes, why not!" So I kicked the miserable curly haired British cunt right in the bollocks!;)

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

RACISM!!!!

Shouldn't be allowed!!

Mod! Mod! Ooooo-ooo! Mod!!

Only kidding Pabs

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London

Can't please anyone

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

A British joke?

Ed Milliband.

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London

Nowhere near as good as his brother the Steve miller band

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By *cl2010Couple
over a year ago

cork

thats pure andy murryism! I'm reporting you!

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

yes but can you make them funny this time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"thats pure andy murryism! I'm reporting you!"

I read your location as cock

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London


"yes but can you make them funny this time? "

Politically correct or funny? You are not having both

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London

My missus from norfolk packed my bags and screamed at me as I walked out of the front door... "I wish u a slow and painful death u bastard!" she yelled...

"Oh, so u want me to stay now!" I replied...!

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire


"My missus from norfolk packed my bags and screamed at me as I walked out of the front door... "I wish u a slow and painful death u bastard!" she yelled...

"Oh, so u want me to stay now!" I replied...!"

talking of norfolk.

they must be loving all this wet weather.

a chance to put their webbed fingers and toes to good use........

never noticed that tunble before.. lol

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

Three English men were in a bar and spotted an Irish man. One guy said he was going to piss him off. He walked over to the Irish man and tapped him on the shoulder, "Hey, I hear your St. Patrick was a sissy."

"Oh really, hmm, didn't know that."

Puzzled the English man walked back to his buddies. "I told him St. Patrick was a sissy and he didn't care!"

"You just don't know how to set him off, watch and learn." The second English man walked over and tapped the Irish man on the shoulder.

"I hear your St. Patrick was a transvestite!"

"Oh, wow, I didn't know that, thank you."

Shocked beyond belief, the English man went back to his mates. "You're right, he is unshakable!"

The third English man said, "No, no, no, I'll really piss him off, you just watch."

He walked over to the Irish man, tapped him on the shoulder and aid, "I hear your St. Patrick was an English man!"

"Yeah, that's what your pals were trying to tell me…………..”

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By *kmale421Man
over a year ago

wirral

After Andy Murry's speech, my tearful Missus said to me "Why can't you be more like HIM?"

"What" I said, "Be more sensitive and cry?"

"No!" She said "Come Second!"

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By *kmale421Man
over a year ago

wirral

2 WPC Dog handlerswere on the beat.

One says "I'm cold, I left my knickers at the station" The other says "Let the dog have a sniff of you fanny and he'll fetch them"

The dog returned 20 minutes later with her knickers, a truncheon, 2 broom handles and 3 of the desk sergeants fingers.

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London

My missus packed my bags and screamed at me as I walked out of the front door... "I wish u a slow and painful death u bastard!" she yelled...

"Oh, so u want me to stay now!" I replied...!

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London

I went out nightclubbing with some friends from overseas. There was me, an Irishman, a Scottsman, an Englishman, a Greek, an Italian, a German, a Hungarian, a Serbian, a Chinese and a Jap.

We arrived at the door and the bouncer said, "I can't let you in without a Thai."

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By *abloBack OP   Man
over a year ago

London

THE CHAVS PRAYER... Our Father who is in prison, even Mum knows not his name. Thy Chavdom come, you'll read The Sun, in Plymouth which is in Devon. Give us this day our Welfare bread and forgive us our ASBOs, as we happy slap those that got ASBOs against us. Lead us not into employment but deliver us free housing. For thine is the Chavdom, the Burberry and Barcardi. Forever and ever.... Innit.

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