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Ironic Questions

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How fast do hotcakes sell?

Why does fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?

If vampires can't see their reflection how do they shave?

What you got?

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

About as handy as a chocolate fire guard

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"About as handy as a chocolate fire guard "

Exactly, and another similar one to this

Who uses a concrete parachute?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"About as handy as a chocolate fire guard

Exactly, and another similar one to this

Who uses a concrete parachute?

"

The same person that put lead in a balloon or got blood out of a stone?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If poison expires, is it more poisonous or is it no longer poisonous?

"

Mind blown

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"About as handy as a chocolate fire guard

Exactly, and another similar one to this

Who uses a concrete parachute?

The same person that put lead in a balloon or got blood out of a stone? "

Most probably

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ashtray on a motorbike

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By *igmaMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire

I make a living from selling rockin horse shit on eBay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'That went down like a lead brick'

What would you use a lead brick for?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Why do you need ID to get ID?

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

If the bird in your hand is a common starling but the two in the bush are rare species is the one in your hand really worth more?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If the bird in your hand is a common starling but the two in the bush are rare species is the one in your hand really worth more? "

Wtf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I make a living from selling rockin horse shit on eBay"

I've got loads of that, Want some?

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

If you took coals to Newcastle would you really not be able to sell them?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Faster than the speed of light.

Erm, there isn't anything that can

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By *igmaMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire


"I make a living from selling rockin horse shit on eBay

I've got loads of that, Want some? "

I’m more on the market for rusty trombones atm

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I make a living from selling rockin horse shit on eBay"

There was a guy a few years ago who proved via ebay that you could get money for old rope

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I make a living from selling rockin horse shit on eBay

There was a guy a few years ago who proved via ebay that you could get money for old rope"

I tried that, but instead a drew a blank.

Whatever that is

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Why does bottled water have a best before date when its been filtered for thousands of years in the earth beforehand

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Why does bottled water have a best before date when its been filtered for thousands of years in the earth beforehand "

Ok, it doesn't take much to confuse me, but this, I'm lost for words

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By *igmaMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire


"I make a living from selling rockin horse shit on eBay

There was a guy a few years ago who proved via ebay that you could get money for old rope"

I worked with a guy who sold tickets to the “Mayan Apocalypse” on eBay a few years ago.

I shit you not!

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport


"'That went down like a lead brick'

What would you use a lead brick for?"

Very useful in the early radioactivity experiments. The first "atomic pile" was literally a pile of lead bricks surrounding a core of radioactive and moderator materials. Built in a university gym if memory serves right (nope, not going to google it). I wonder if the gym is still a lethal environment...

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport


"If you took coals to Newcastle would you really not be able to sell them?"

Apparently yes you can take coals to Newcastle and sell them, the north eastern coal is of a particular type and is not the best for power stations. Also, there are businesses in Britain that do sell sand to the arabs!

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"'That went down like a lead brick'

What would you use a lead brick for?

Very useful in the early radioactivity experiments. The first "atomic pile" was literally a pile of lead bricks surrounding a core of radioactive and moderator materials. Built in a university gym if memory serves right (nope, not going to google it). I wonder if the gym is still a lethal environment..."

The Rutherford lab at UoM is still radioactive so.......

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

How long IS a piece of string?

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

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By *rivateparts!Man
over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!


"What was the best thing before sliced bread?"

The wheel

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville


"What was the best thing before sliced bread?

The wheel "

And before the wheel?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What was the best thing before sliced bread?

The wheel

And before the wheel? "

Fanny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's the point of having an 'Eat By' date on a cream cake?

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Why do people say oxygen is good, maybe it is slowly killing everyone but It takes 75-100 years to fully work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do crabs (sea dwelling ones) think, humans walk sideways ?

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"Why do people say oxygen is good, maybe it is slowly killing everyone but It takes 75-100 years to fully work."

Ummmm because we need it for aerobic respiration that enables ATP to be formed, which transfers all the energy required for us to move (e.g the muscles which expand and contract the ribcage for us to breathe). Little things like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If vampires can't see their reflection how do they shave?

They meet up and shave each other

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By *uriouscouple83Couple
over a year ago

Worcester


"Why do people say oxygen is good, maybe it is slowly killing everyone but It takes 75-100 years to fully work.

Ummmm because we need it for aerobic respiration that enables ATP to be formed, which transfers all the energy required for us to move (e.g the muscles which expand and contract the ribcage for us to breathe). Little things like that "

How much does a molecule of Adenosine triphosphate cost?

ATP

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What was the best thing before sliced bread?"

I love this one

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"Why do people say oxygen is good, maybe it is slowly killing everyone but It takes 75-100 years to fully work.

Ummmm because we need it for aerobic respiration that enables ATP to be formed, which transfers all the energy required for us to move (e.g the muscles which expand and contract the ribcage for us to breathe). Little things like that

How much does a molecule of Adenosine triphosphate cost?

ATP "

One thirty-eighth of a molecule of glucose (theoretically)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How high is up?

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

What is a picture of a thousand words worth?

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

How long is a piece of string

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Why can't you buy a replacement spirit level bubble

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So which Did come first, chicken or egg?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Age old question what came first the chicken or the egg

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"Age old question what came first the chicken or the egg "

The egg if it was male

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By *tevelizCouple
over a year ago

northampton


"How long IS a piece of string? "
on a boat if you call it a rope it's 8 inches. Only rope on a boat is the bell rope.

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By *tevelizCouple
over a year ago

northampton


"Age old question what came first the chicken or the egg "
did the dinosaur come before the chicken

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How did the first person know that you can get milk from a cow doing that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Age old question what came first the chicken or the egg did the dinosaur come before the chicken"

Yes lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Age old question what came first the chicken or the egg

did the dinosaur come before the chicken"

As in Prematureejactulation rex do you mean?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How did the first person know that you can get milk from a cow doing that? "

Though instinct and observers

A human mother peruseds milk and a cow mother prudence milk two and two to gether makes 4

The real question should be who thought off drinking cows milk first

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Age old question what came first the chicken or the egg

did the dinosaur come before the chicken

As in Prematureejactulation rex do you mean? "

That would have been a good attraction on Jurassic Park

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Why didn’t they list the word ‘gullible’ in the dictionary?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Age old question what came first the chicken or the egg

did the dinosaur come before the chicken

As in Prematureejactulation rex do you mean?

That would have been a good attraction on Jurassic Park "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With all the extra weight from buildings, cars, concrete, Landfill and civilisation how much more weight can the earth take before it starts to slip from its axis ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

If a word is spelt incorrectly in the dictionary how would we know?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why’s Why got a Y In it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why does bottled water have a best before date when its been filtered for thousands of years in the earth beforehand "

The lining in the bottle degrades over time

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"How long IS a piece of string? on a boat if you call it a rope it's 8 inches. Only rope on a boat is the bell rope.

"

The question is about string. Not rope

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How long IS a piece of string? "

Twice the distance from the middle to one end

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport


"If a word is spelt incorrectly in the dictionary how would we know? "

There is a word spelt incorrectly in the dictionary!

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West


"If a word is spelt incorrectly in the dictionary how would we know?

There is a word spelt incorrectly in the dictionary!"

I-N-C-O-R-R-E-C-T-L-Y

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If a word is spelt incorrectly in the dictionary how would we know?

There is a word spelt incorrectly in the dictionary!

I-N-C-O-R-R-E-C-T-L-Y "

Haha I like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If a word is spelt incorrectly in the dictionary how would we know?

There is a word spelt incorrectly in the dictionary!

I-N-C-O-R-R-E-C-T-L-Y "

Class

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport


"If a word is spelt incorrectly in the dictionary how would we know?

There is a word spelt incorrectly in the dictionary!

I-N-C-O-R-R-E-C-T-L-Y

Class "

But is incorrectly spelt incorrectly when it's spelt correctly? And if incorrect is spelt correct, is it incorrect or correct?

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS
over a year ago

Stockport

And if the Barber of Seville shaves all the men of Seville who don't shave themselves, then who shaves the Barber of Seville?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And how does the snow plough driver get to work, to plough the impassable roads so people can get to work?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a friend who’s job it is to clean the poo out of cuckoo clocks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If heat rises how come it’s bloody cold at the top of a mountain

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"And how does the snow plough driver get to work, to plough the impassable roads so people can get to work?"

Wtf

Haha

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