FabSwingers.com forum: single mothers

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

i was out having a coffee yesterday in bermaw (barmouth. Normally things dont give me a reason to see red and almost say something but

there was 2 girls about 22-25 both with kids and was bragging about how the system works for them and how they get help like a flat and support yet they cant be bothered to get a job!!! ( yep one actually said it)

the few people who was close by shook their heads in disbelief at that comment like i did and took all my will power to not call them a scrounger.

has this society got to the point now that some people are happy not to work and pay there way in society. I work damm hard to get what i earn and i enjoy working and i know the benefits system wouldn't be able to pay me what i am accustomed to

(but least i admit that)

just wondering about this would u be happy not working and claiming from the government without a care in the world?

( and please dont give me shit about the mothers are looking after the kids) as i have single mothers as friends and they do full time work so its very possible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No way I want my daughters to respect me they see me go out to work in the morning not the government and their handouts I am proberbly no better off working than on benefits and yes I get tax credits but I pay my way. Been on benefits once as a stop gap when my second daughter was born hopefully never again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I prefer to work, it sort of makes me appreciate what I have.

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By *ummy mummyWoman
over a year ago

southampton-ish

and some of us have been trying hard to get work...not all who have had to depend on help from the state have that mindset of why bother working. I would like to think that my children can still have respect for me for trying to do the best by them during a difficult time. I usually try to stay away from topics like this as I do take it personally...but I often do get lumped into that category of scrounger because of being on benefits at the moment. If I had the choice and could find the hours,the affordable childcare, damn right I would prefer to be working as I always have.The part time job I did have and was going to be able to get over 16hrs with fizzled out so I am back to square one...and I am online everyday looking for something to replace it with no luck at the moment...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a baby when i was 18, i wasnt married and i felt quite ashamed.

my gran said i should have the baby adopted.

I dont think anyone should get pregnant on purpose if they havnt got a place to live or enough money.

I do think its a good thing though if mums stay at home to look after their kids like they used to years ago though.

These days theres no excuse for accidents though because there is much more birth control available and abortion is legal.

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By *uyuksno1Man
over a year ago

poole

unfortunately in this politically correct world we dont help the situation i work in education and im afraid we r encouraged to give aid and preference to these familes when sometimes the mothers are just out of the education system themselves

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

its not that im having a go _ummy mummy at all just pissed me off that two women could say that and be so blatant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people that have never paid in, should get paid less out!

I'm at home with my little boy atm, and said I would for the first year.

I based it on a year as I knew I would breast feed for a year, but I've spent so much of my savings, topping up the 'income' I get now I will be back at work before he is a year old.

A work ethic is priceless but it sucks that those that pay in for years and years then get dumped in the same category as those that never did nor intend to

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By *uyuksno1Man
over a year ago

poole

no i know i think we would all concur at the blatant hapless carefree attitude some of them have i see it every day in my job xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i was out having a coffee yesterday in bermaw (barmouth. Normally things dont give me a reason to see red and almost say something but

the few people who was close by shook their heads in disbelief at that comment like i did and took all my will power to not call them a scrounger.

(but least i admit that)

just wondering about this would u be happy not working and claiming from the government without a care in the world?

( and please dont give me shit about the mothers are looking after the kids) as i have single mothers as friends and they do full time work so its very possible "

Drives me up the wall - even more than fuel prices, lousy weather and reality TV.

Makes me want to move abroad sometimes where folk have no choice but to work!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive always worked, i got pregnant at 16 but i still stayed in education, i think its the way your bought up, when i found out i was pregnant my parents quite flatly told me that it was no excuse to drop out of school and that they would not support me if i did, i stayed on at school till i was 18, went to collage and uni and worked my whole life since, i have 3 kids and spend most of my life single, tho i have been married ive spent more time between relationships than in them, ive never had any help from the system, ive never had child support, every penny i have i have earned myself, dont get me wrong its been hard, i can understand why some people with kids feel like its to hard to work, but i refused to be a statistic, i refused to be a unempolyed teenage mum, i think what kept me going, by 18 i had two kids, was at collage and working part time to get a bit of extra money in and doing all this alone, so it can be done, anyone who says you cant work with young kids are talking crap, its a cop out for not wanting to work

It does annoy me at times but to be honest so long as i provide for my kids and i have my own self respect for doing so thats all that matters to me

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By *ush_tushWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I became a single parent 16 yrs ago and spent the first 5 looking after my son, prior to that of always worked, paid taxes etc. As soon as he went to school I got myself a f/t job But was made redundant after 7 yrs. Since turn I've found had a few jobs, mainly p/t but still contribued none the less.

Now of course I receive tax credits but I see it as I've put in so im entitled to take some out, that's how I've justified being on benefits and in receipt of tax credits.

i am all for those that recieve assistance who are in NEED but for those who can't be arsed or have never contributed should be penalised in some way but im not sure how.

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By *ummy mummyWoman
over a year ago

southampton-ish

"its not that im having a go _ummy mummy at all just pissed me off that two women could say that and be so blatant "

Oh, I know you weren't...they piss me off as well...the last time I went to the jobcentre for an appointment I made when my boss said she would be able to give me over 16hrs, they gave me an appointment at the local surestart centre and I was sat there waiting with a bunch of teen mums who were having pretty much the same conversation and it took all my being not to comment( especially when one realised that she had forgotten to pack her baby's formula-but had remembered her iphone and to do her ton and a half of makeup and don her uggs..)I was so thrilled to finally be able to move one step closer to independence that I called them to see what it meant would change etc. Sadly due to a bit of bad luck my boss can not give me 16 hrs now...not really any hours now when I really want it and need it as my twins turned 5 last month so the income support stopped.

On top of the getting called a scrounger I also get the "damn foreigner" speech about me coming over and scrounger...when I was working within a week of coming here 8 1/2 years ago and worked between having my kids...was just dealt a bad hand when the ex decided to leave when the twins were 4 months old and my son was 2.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i have no problem with tax credits, i dont get them because i earn over the amount to quialify but im all for helping people who help themselves

Id sooner my tax's go towards people one low wages to enable them to be able to afford to work than people on the dole

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By *xccvvMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire North East

How about single parents rather than single mothers, was a sinlge parent for many a year now kids all grown up, still have one at home, it always poor old single mothers, or mums this, mums that, it just rattles my cage and has done for many a year how women have cried on about this as if its an exclusive club

Gets off soap box and off to work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

would be difficult for them to work with babies if theyre single parents

but wouldnt be bragging about things

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

yes, some people do choose to have children and not work so that they get a new home and an income.

i was listening to the news on radio 1 recently and a girl on there said that if she needed some more money she would have another child

and these are the people that moan when there isnt enough moey to go round and cuts have to be made! thats what pisses me off, they sit on their arse and expect those wo arewilling and able to work to work harder and longer to support their lazy arses

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"would be difficult for them to work with babies if theyre single parents

but wouldnt be bragging about things

nurseries and creches, working tax credits, part time work etc

if someone WANTS to work they will find a way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How about single parents rather than single mothers, was a sinlge parent for many a year now kids all grown up, still have one at home, it always poor old single mothers, or mums this, mums that, it just rattles my cage and has done for many a year how women have cried on about this as if its an exclusive club

Gets off soap box and off to work"

ok i dont like single dads on the dole either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i was out having a coffee yesterday in bermaw (barmouth. Normally things dont give me a reason to see red and almost say something but

the few people who was close by shook their heads in disbelief at that comment like i did and took all my will power to not call them a scrounger.

(but least i admit that)

just wondering about this would u be happy not working and claiming from the government without a care in the world?

( and please dont give me shit about the mothers are looking after the kids) as i have single mothers as friends and they do full time work so its very possible "

Some people will always try and screw the system. They think their pussy is a slot machine and babies and nothing more than £20 notes. Sad really as that's not what parenting is all about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm just back from the 'dole' office. I actually felt ashamed having to go and sign on but there is nothing even part-time for me just now. I don't know how others can be so brazen about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jaqs, this problem has been around for years, the Tories said they were going to put a stop to it. yeah right. I live in a large mining village and i would estimate that 30% of the population is on the dole and most of them have never put in a days work and have no intention of doing so. Lots of young women here have a council house because they couldn't stand living at home and got pregnant on purpose. Guess who looks after the baby when they go out on the town every weekend? yep Mum and dad.

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By *almh5Couple
over a year ago

Manchester

I think the fact that the majority of people claiming Housing Benefit are working and the amount of people claiming working benefits says a lot more about the minimum wage, taxes, extortionate rents, horrendous childcare costs, etc then demonising a whole section of society

I could say that those having to claim HB and WTC are obviously sitting on their laurels and letting the taxpayer pick up the slack because they cant be bothered to educate themselves more to get a better job or work a bit harder.

But I dont because it's pretty crap out there, more unemployed than there are jobs, jobs that are out there are pretty badly paid, theres no job security and people are scared of redundancy.

But hey, far more easy to blame certain sections of society

And boo on you those who dont have the guts to go against what other posters have put.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

can i just say ive worked from 16 up until my maternity leave back in december 09, ive loved every single minute of being a single parent, and glad i've watched my baby girl grow and develop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the problem is that a life on benefits has now becoem a life choice and not the safety net that it was designed to be.

it is too easy for some people not to work.

i know young girls who have intentionally got pregnant so they can leave home and get a council flat.

sadly its a bye product of the welfare state.

and there is no easy answer.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"can i just say ive worked from 16 up until my maternity leave back in december 09, ive loved every single minute of being a single parent, and glad i've watched my baby girl grow and develop.

dont think this thread is suggesting that EVERY single parent is bad, just those who use their womb as a money making scheme.

There are tonnes of single parents who dont fall into the above category, who work or have worked hard to support their family

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest everyone round where i live that i was call a benefit scrounger and have loads of kid that they do not support themselves arnt single parents

Theres a married couple near me with 9 kids, neither of them have worked, he cant cause hes got a back thats that bad he cant even do a sit down job even tho hes bonked his way tho 9 kids, her eldest in soon to leave school and shes already said that they are planning on having another child so they dont loose the money when he does

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly, i cannot see how people think they have a right to judge others - those girls walking past ''looked 22-23ish'' but could easily have been younger. The government has allowed the generation to grow up with the luxury of looking after their children at home, and benefits are there. So who are we to judge?

Secondly - alot of single mothers out there do not choose their situations - i being but one! For myself, this was my family home - however, since becoming single 22 months ago, with 1 school age child, and one 6 month old. For me alone - i do not drive. I do not live beside an easily accessible bus route. We have a 3 bedroom'd home of 4 years, costing way over what a council house would - but, am i entitled - no lol! I worked from 14 up until i had my daughter @ 20, to then be married @ 21. I worked throughout being pregnant but took a 6months paid - 6 months unpaid leave, after madam had been born! You never know what direction life's paths will take you, and i ended up in Southampton 5 yrs ago. Within 14 days of living here, i had a full-time job. Our routine would be up at 6.45, out the door at 7.45 to the childminders, me then to bus to work for the day, and the same for home-time. I stayed until cuts after 2 yrs had been made. I had a partner whom i lived with, so did not need to claim any bens at this point in time. After a month ans a half, i found a full time job, not far from home, and worked it out with another childminder for my partner to drop madam off to, or my friend would watch her from time to time. As it currently stands - I am at home with both my children, I do the school run, come home, or club, or what have you - i am on benefits also. BUT, as the council will not help me into a council property - there is a waiting list of a 5 year period i have been told, and so, i cannot afford - WITH THE JOB CENTER'S CALCULATION OF FULL TIME HOURS - to pay the bills i have,childminder for lil man all day plus madam before, after school plus the retainer fee - put food in the kids bellys, travel, there is no money for clothes, shoes etc - at all!!! So, for my situ, it does not pay to work!!! This is not me being a slacker, it is not me not wishing to work! Every single mother as it stands in this country has the right not to look to return to work, until their youngest child is 8. This is to change, to 5! Which is totally acceptable, and will then be a lot easier to manage for 1, time, and giving my babies the best i can!!! You never know what paths are ahead of you in life - and yes, life is what you make - but when my daughter looks at me, she sees that i am always there for her - I have taught her the right from wrong in her journy so far - and not left it down to the childminders in life etc - As i can do with my lil man, who is now 2. NEVER JUDGE OTHERS - FOR ONE DAY, YOU MIGHT JUST BE IN A WORSE SITU YOURSELF!!! The government is what has molded this society, the young mothers only have their generation of parents to learn from. Raaaaaa i could so go on n on - (yes, i know i have - but i hope my point has been clear)!! Lolls x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"can i just say ive worked from 16 up until my maternity leave back in december 09, ive loved every single minute of being a single parent, and glad i've watched my baby girl grow and develop.

HERE HERE!!! As it is possible, within our society to have such periods in our lives. xx

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

but have you ever had the attitude of 'i wana have a kids os i get a house'? or hmmm, could do with some more money will hav a kid??

fromt the sound of your post i'm guessing not, therefore this thread is not judging you

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Deep...breath...

What annoys me and gets my gander up are women who make decisions to get knocked up but look down their noses at working mothers.

If we didn't work the ungrateful and workshy would keep their frigging legs closed or find men that want to hang around after they've sobered up!

My comments are aimed solely towards those who think they are super mothers because they don't use a.minder and work!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Threads like these should not be on a swinging site - many of the comments on here - when your not in the same situations as these single parents you speak off!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really don't worry about it. It's nothing to do me with me so i don't get bent out of shape about it. which is probably why i see some peoples attitude to it a little over the top

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Threads like these should not be on a swinging site - many of the comments on here - when your not in the same situations as these single parents you speak off!!"

why I have a family member who is a single mum of 2 wee ones aged 5 and 3, I can see her struggle daily with them, I have nothing but complete respect for what she does.... I bloody couldn't do it. The dad is no where to be seen, pays nothing, she gets the appropriate benefit following full consideration of her salary for 2 days work in a contact centre 60 miles round trip away.

she doesn't have a minute to herself...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's it got to do with u? If that's there life sod all to do with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most people on here have or is still claiming benefits. Think before u answer no I'm not claiming benefits .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there are lots of single parents out there that maybe not by choice are now classed and tarnished with that image,quite a few have been left in that situation by there so called BF/ Husbands who think the grass is greener on the other side. don't judge a book by its cover spring to mind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most people on here have or is still claiming benefits. Think before u answer no I'm not claiming benefits . "

wish at times

we are on benefits, we might be better off lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Threads like these should not be on a swinging site - many of the comments on here - when your not in the same situations as these single parents you speak off!!

she doesn't have a minute to herself..."

I am in a similar situ - u must have missed my huge spread above lol... x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"there are lots of single parents out there that maybe not by choice are now classed and tarnished with that image,quite a few have been left in that situation by there so called BF/ Husbands who think the grass is greener on the other side. don't judge a book by its cover spring to mind"

Exactly! I had a five bedroom architect designed house, a thriving architects practice a lovely man and happy family. A careless driver wiped all that away in one deft stroke.

My partner killed, I had to fold the business, eventually sell the house and move to a smaller place.

But for the grace of God go others.

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Threads like these should not be on a swinging site - many of the comments on here - when your not in the same situations as these single parents you speak off!!"

Can I suggest that you read the OP again. the thread was started in response to an overheard conversation, not as a general downer on single parents.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Most people on here have or is still claiming benefits. Think before u answer no I'm not claiming benefits .

wish at times

we are on benefits, we might be better off lol"
uhave kids? If u did u had benifits , if u r over 60 u get benifits all of us have had benifits over the years, y the government have no money is simple let to many scrounges in who have six to eight kids can't speak English won't work but then again we can't talk about them can we? That's why. I'm saving my money to send my kids to Australia better life for them there to late for us but not for them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

While i applaud all the single, working mothers on here, who haven't taken a penny in benefits but would rather get back to work asap, bravo!!!

BUT....aren't you missing out on the bigger picture here??

These are your kids most informative years, when they and you bond together! If you choose to go straight back to work and drop your kids off at the nursery/childminders thats your choice!

Other mothers may choose to take time off work and bond with/bring up their kids instead of handing them over and then complaining they don't get enough child tax to cover the cost of a rtranger looking after them!

Each to their own i say!!

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

"While i applaud all the single, working mothers on here, who haven't taken a penny in benefits but would rather get back to work asap, bravo!!!

BUT....aren't you missing out on the bigger picture here??

These are your kids most informative years, when they and you bond together! If you choose to go straight back to work and drop your kids off at the nursery/childminders thats your choice!

Each to their own i say!! "

Are you feeling

and having a stir?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"While i applaud all the single, working mothers on here, who haven't taken a penny in benefits but would rather get back to work asap, bravo!!!

BUT....aren't you missing out on the bigger picture here??

These are your kids most informative years, when they and you bond together! If you choose to go straight back to work and drop your kids off at the nursery/childminders thats your choice!

Each to their own i say!! "
so u saying these mothers who work don't take benifits ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"While i applaud all the single, working mothers on here, who haven't taken a penny in benefits but would rather get back to work asap, bravo!!!

BUT....aren't you missing out on the bigger picture here??

These are your kids most informative years, when they and you bond together! If you choose to go straight back to work and drop your kids off at the nursery/childminders thats your choice!

Each to their own i say!! "

in an ideal world i would agree, but in the real world most parents can not afford to to take time off or not work at all, the day's of 1 wage in a family was enough to live on has well gone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"While i applaud all the single, working mothers on here, who haven't taken a penny in benefits but would rather get back to work asap, bravo!!!

BUT....aren't you missing out on the bigger picture here??

These are your kids most informative years, when they and you bond together! If you choose to go straight back to work and drop your kids off at the nursery/childminders thats your choice!

Each to their own i say!! so u saying these mothers who work don't take benifits ? "

nope! I'm saying each to their own! Some choose to work and make money to bring up their kids, some chose to take time off and spend time with their kids!! Its pretty self explanatory really!!

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"What is happening to our young people? They disrespect their elders, they disobey their parents. They ignore the law. They riot in the streets inflamed with wild notions. Their morals are decaying. What is to become of them?"

- Plato 423-347 BC

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

""What is happening to our young people? They disrespect their elders, they disobey their parents. They ignore the law. They riot in the streets inflamed with wild notions. Their morals are decaying. What is to become of them?"

- Plato 423-347 BC"
blame the parents

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's it got to do with u? If that's there life sod all to do with"

That's where you are wrong! The money they get is paid for by the taxpayer, in other words you and me. Fine if they want to live that life if they can afford to pay for it themselves. I am not talking about the genuine people who can't work, or the mothers who want to stay at home with their children, I have no problem with that at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Threads like these should not be on a swinging site - many of the comments on here - when your not in the same situations as these single parents you speak off!!

Can I suggest that you read the OP again. the thread was started in response to an overheard conversation, not as a general downer on single parents."

''just wondering about this would u be happy not working and claiming from the government without a care in the world?

( and please dont give me shit about the mothers are looking after the kids) as i have single mothers as friends and they do full time work so its very possible''

This does infact suggest that what i have spoken off - is indeedy her _iew over all.... If you read the spec again...

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By *eaverfeverCouple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

Answer to op

No it wouldnt bother me as ive done it,was a single parent at 17 and brought my child up on my own while on hand outs until I started work when child went to school. I didnt and still dont feel bad as I feel ive paid back what I took out so to speak.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im not really inteterested in what others do but nothin gives me greater pleasure than seeing the kids opening their presents on xmas day and knowing the smiles on their faces are because we worked bloody hard to pay for it. The one thing that fooks me off , around here anyway, is a lot of the mothers who dont work for whatever reason refer to themselves as " full time mums" as if to imply that working mothers are only "part time" mothers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i was out having a coffee yesterday in bermaw (barmouth. Normally things dont give me a reason to see red and almost say something but

the few people who was close by shook their heads in disbelief at that comment like i did and took all my will power to not call them a scrounger.

(but least i admit that)

just wondering about this would u be happy not working and claiming from the government without a care in the world?

( and please dont give me shit about the mothers are looking after the kids) as i have single mothers as friends and they do full time work so its very possible "
you sound like a tory lol If some people live on benefits and enjoy then that is sad,and maybe there are a lot of issues i.e. ignorance to what education and work can do for a person.Personally I'm more concerned about the people at the top robbing us,tax dodgers and bankers etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's it got to do with u? If that's there life sod all to do with

i do

if you have kids you should work for them

I would have sooner stayed at home with my kids but i gave birth to them so i worked to privide for them

What would happen if all mums decided not to work and stay home to look after their kids for 18 years

I work hard to provide for my kids why should i provide for theirs too

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By *ayjay999Man
over a year ago

Well they was being honest most ppl don't Say it but deep down they love it.. Why do they need to work coz they will get more staying at home.... So them girls are kind of smart.... Plus they not breaking the law it's there to me had lol

Wish I was a single mom

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mums have to return to work by a childs 7th birthday

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"While i applaud all the single, working mothers on here, who haven't taken a penny in benefits but would rather get back to work asap, bravo!!!

BUT....aren't you missing out on the bigger picture here??

These are your kids most informative years, when they and you bond together! If you choose to go straight back to work and drop your kids off at the nursery/childminders thats your choice!

Each to their own i say!! "

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By *ayjay999Man
over a year ago

"Mums have to return to work by a childs 7th birthday"

U better return to me bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the OP's post was aimed at the type of girls/ women that see having kids as a career choice. There's tons round here that blatantly have kids just for the money.

I think that people who HAVE to claim dole/ benefits because there are no jobs... are good people, dealt a rough hand.

I think that people who claim dole/ benefits because they are lazy idiots that would rather stay home and watch telly all day than work.... are lower than low scumbags.

There is a difference.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

love how so many people are missing the point of the OP and geting all defensive about raising their children.

no one has said you dont have the right to raise your child. what has been argued is that SOME single parents use their children as paycheques with no intention of paying back into the system.

To al those single parents who have returned to work and managed to look after their children, you are a credit and a great role model to your children.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"love how so many people are missing the point of the OP and geting all defensive about raising their children.

no one has said you dont have the right to raise your child. what has been argued is that SOME single parents use their children as paycheques with no intention of paying back into the system.

To al those single parents who have returned to work and managed to look after their children, you are a credit and a great role model to your children."
(still wearing my had hat) agreed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"love how so many people are missing the point of the OP and geting all defensive about raising their children.

no one has said you dont have the right to raise your child. what has been argued is that SOME single parents use their children as paycheques with no intention of paying back into the system.

To al those single parents who have returned to work and managed to look after their children, you are a credit and a great role model to your children."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's it got to do with u? If that's there life sod all to do with

i do

if you have kids you should work for them

I would have sooner stayed at home with my kids but i gave birth to them so i worked to privide for them

What would happen if all mums decided not to work and stay home to look after their kids for 18 years

I work hard to provide for my kids why should i provide for theirs too

Ok, that came out wrong, I agree with you, after the first year they should at least try to support themselves and not rely on the taxpayer. My wife stayed at home with the children because I could afford it, she got heavily involved with the NCT, PTA etc. so she wasn't sitting on her butt and didn't claim a penny.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What's it got to do with u? If that's there life sod all to do with

i do

if you have kids you should work for them

I would have sooner stayed at home with my kids but i gave birth to them so i worked to privide for them

What would happen if all mums decided not to work and stay home to look after their kids for 18 years

I work hard to provide for my kids why should i provide for theirs too

Thats different tho, there are lots of families where the mum stays at home and looks after the kids while dad goes out to work, thats not classed as being unemplyed to me because as a family unit they are still earning their own living

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

- Plato 423-347 BC"

I suppose I fall into this group due to my age? I'm guessing when you were in you late teens early 20s your elders prob said the same. It's nothing to do with the youth it's to do with the up bringing you get in life. A lot of young people don't respect their parents because their parents didn't respect them enough to teach them manners and discipline.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Scenario!!

A single girl of 21 has a child, she decides to spend the childs formative years at home and BOND with her child!! I.E. The first 5-7 years!

Now, according to all you (i work so should she) people out there, she is a scrounger!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stay at home like they did years ago

Ffs

I was born in the 60s and my parents worked full time til retirement.

I work and I enjoy it. And if I didn't we would now be homeless.

I do envy people who are so simplistic about life though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Scenario!!

A single girl of 21 has a child, she decides to spend the childs formative years at home and BOND with her child!! I.E. The first 5-7 years!

Now, according to all you (i work so should she) people out there, she is a scrounger!!!

Haha, get a grip of real life folks, she chose to have a baby, to love and nurture said baby, not hand it into a childminders crib at the drop of a hat!!! Plus, how many of you working, single mothers get subsidised to work? Child tax credits?? Childcare tax credits?? "
That is true, Tax credit are a subsidy and they do cost the state a lot of money, but there is an ideological reason behind that. A it's easier to get into work if you are working.

Also if you are working you are contributing to the countries productivity (ie, adding to the total amount of work done). Tax credits were put in place to make work pay.

When kids go to school I don't see any problem with women being able to go to work, incidentaly, I don't see any problem with kids going into a nursery or 'Childminders crib' as you call it.......

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Im not really inteterested in what others do but nothin gives me greater pleasure than seeing the kids opening their presents on xmas day and knowing the smiles on their faces are because we worked bloody hard to pay for it. The one thing that fooks me off , around here anyway, is a lot of the mothers who dont work for whatever reason refer to themselves as " full time mums" as if to imply that working mothers are only "part time" mothers

THAT'S what annoys me too. I wouldn't mind working and supporting women dumb and slack enough to be nothing but breeders if they shut the fuck up about being full time mums etc. These simpletons usually have the audacity to look down their noses of those of us supporting their life style choices.

Those that have become single parents by death/divorce and end up on benefits seldom show disdain towards working mothers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Those that have become single parents by death/divorce and end up on benefits seldom show disdain towards working mothers. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Children to some are a source of income and each government (as MP's are younger)seem to want to put more money in their pockets and provide more resources for them. Gone are the days of responsibility.

The system does need a drastic overhaul where monies are put where it is needed, the old ,the sick, the disabled those not able to work. Not making children a career, also schools should be open longer to keep the kids of the street and better educated

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

to all the great role model single mums & dads.... I certainly was very lucky.

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By *ottsguy44Man
over a year ago

nottinghamshire

Bring back national service when teenagers leave school. They will learn respect and a trade.. Then we might teach the next generation of adults to

work....

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Bring back national service when teenagers leave school. They will learn respect and a trade.. Then we might teach the next generation of adults to

work.... "

I agree now that I am too old for it..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work? "

no but have an intent to, circumstances may be that:

you may be financially secure you don't need to

or trying to get work to no avail but instilling a work ethic to your offspring

or illness means you are unable to.

I posted in the Scottish Forum on a similar thread asking how many deferred having a child since 2007 and the onset of one of the worst recessions in history... or is it ' I must have ' culture

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

no but have an intent to, circumstances may be that:

you may be financially secure you don't need to

or trying to get work to no avail but instilling a work ethic to your offspring

or illness means you are unable to.

I posted in the Scottish Forum on a similar thread asking how many deferred having a child since 2007 and the onset of one of the worst recessions in history... or is it ' I must have ' culture

I have some friends who's mum hasn't worked but they treat her with masses amount of respect and love her dearly. They idolize her almost. Her 3 children all work and 2 are doing apprentiships so i do not think its down to the mother not working, but her skills as a parent to provide what that child needs

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

no but have an intent to, circumstances may be that:

you may be financially secure you don't need to

or trying to get work to no avail but instilling a work ethic to your offspring

or illness means you are unable to.

I posted in the Scottish Forum on a similar thread asking how many deferred having a child since 2007 and the onset of one of the worst recessions in history... or is it ' I must have ' culture

why didnt she work?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be a role model to a child you should be responsible for your actions and those that decide to breed should look after their responsibilty not expect other Tax payers to keep you in comfort. It takes two to make a child therefore two as parents should keep the child not the nation if you cannot afford a child do not have one, there are no excuses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work? "

I don't think you have to work, but having a work based ethic rather than a benefits based ethic and allowing the child to see that has surely got to be a good thing ?

From posts I have seen in the past from you Sassy, I cannot fail to appreciate that you do what you feel is best for both your little' un and yourself, so I am not being personal at all.

I feel that by adopting an approach that makes the child realise that to work and add value to society is correct behaviour and working the benefits system to your personal benefit is not can only be a good thing.

Abuse of the benefits system and an acceptance that it is normal to milk it for all you can, is quickly becoming a generational issue in the UK.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why didnt she work?"

Ive no idea why she didnt, never something i asked.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

why didnt she work?

Ive no idea why she didnt, never something i asked."

well as I mentioned it may be

she had her own financial means

or an

illness that prevented her and her kids appreciated that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am a single mum on benifits because now i am a carer 24/7 for my disabled daughter. But still i would have been very angry with the woman in question and i would have said something to them. It gets my back up when i hear things like "I don't want to work or it's not worth working because i get this, that and the other"I would give anything to be able to work as i have done in the past ( i am a trained chef and used to own my own Bistro for a number of yrs) having to be in the house with a non-verbal 13yr old and a 15yr old that has her own life and friends as with my 21yr old, my life can be very lonely at times. Pork and I do not live together infact we are in separate Countys.It's not that we don't want to live together it's just very difficult with my Josie because although she is 13 she has the mind of an 18 month old baby and we still have sleepless nights etc and also Porks work commitments as well.So about 25% of us are genuine the others should get off their arses and do something with their lives as i don't care how many babies they push out to stop them selves form earning a decent living !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To be a role model to a child you should be responsible for your actions and those that decide to breed should look after their responsibilty not expect other Tax payers to keep you in comfort. It takes two to make a child therefore two as parents should keep the child not the nation if you cannot afford a child do not have one, there are no excuses."

Maybe we should be like China and have a limit on how many children we can have !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i was out having a coffee yesterday in bermaw (barmouth. Normally things dont give me a reason to see red and almost say something but

the few people who was close by shook their heads in disbelief at that comment like i did and took all my will power to not call them a scrounger.

(but least i admit that)

just wondering about this would u be happy not working and claiming from the government without a care in the world?

( and please dont give me shit about the mothers are looking after the kids) as i have single mothers as friends and they do full time work so its very possible "

i became a single mother a while ago now and i currently have three jobs sometimes four to keep everything paid yes it is bloody hard. but no and i do believe while people get more on the system they will play it even here on job threads people say they will get more on benefits than paid work not sure what happened to pride. i want my children to know u work hard u get a reward for it also its your job to support the kids u have not other peoples not a popular _iew. not sure i would have been able to keep my mouth shut if i had heard them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i was out having a coffee yesterday in bermaw (barmouth. Normally things dont give me a reason to see red and almost say something but

the few people who was close by shook their heads in disbelief at that comment like i did and took all my will power to not call them a scrounger.

(but least i admit that)

just wondering about this would u be happy not working and claiming from the government without a care in the world?

( and please dont give me shit about the mothers are looking after the kids) as i have single mothers as friends and they do full time work so its very possible

x"
I agree 100%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm surprised that it took till 2012 for you to realise this jacqs!! Some not all single mums are having kids for benefits, it's a sad fact of life, the way some people treat and talk to their kids astounds me as I can't understand their way of life, like the tv as a baby sitter, anymore than an hour a day is counter productive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think i'm amazingly fortunate and never forgotten that. If it wasn't for my daughter i would have been living at home with my grandparents still. I took precautions against falling pregnant and discovered i was so at 33 weeks. I wasn't in a secure loving relationship so ended up alone. It was too late to terminate and if i decided to have her adopted then surely that would cost the system more money too.

I kept her, love her more than my own life. I stand by my choice to stay at home and raise my own child rather than pay someone else to do so. I have records of all of her firsts and those are moments i treasure greatly. Hats off to parents who go out to work and juggle both. Children grow up so fast and i just wanted to stick around for the first 2 and half years. I will return to work (applying for jobs as we speak) as we are both ready, she enjoys nursery and now needs additional educational support and independence with her new friends away from me. Its also important for me to regain some adult time and to have something other than '5 little ducks' on my mind.

I wouldn't put others down who choose to stay at home til the child is aged 7 though. It just might be the right choice for them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a single working mother of a 16 year old who's already got an 18.5 a week permanent job which she's been doing since before christmas whilst in her final year at school and doing her gcse's...prior to this she sold avon in an account in my name, i can only say that I am so proud that ive taught my kids that working and earning is the way to go...even my 10 year old keeps asking why she cant work at MacDonalds lol! So glad my kids wont be such a burden on society!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As a single working mother of a 16 year old who's already got an 18.5 a week permanent job which she's been doing since before christmas whilst in her final year at school and doing her gcse's...prior to this she sold avon in an account in my name, i can only say that I am so proud that ive taught my kids that working and earning is the way to go...even my 10 year old keeps asking why she cant work at MacDonalds lol! So glad my kids wont be such a burden on society!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

they have now changed the benefits that as soon as your youngest child reaches the age of 5 you are then moved on to jobseekers allowance,i worked from the age of 15 as my birthday was late in the school year and i went straight into my nursing training at the age of 16 i qualified at the age of 18 and i loved it unfortunatley i had to quit nursing just before i hit 21 due to a bad back and a horrendous ex but i was also working in pubs during that time as it is the family trade and i always enjoyed it, i had my first child just before i turned 22 but had to quit work at 5 months pregnant because of complications but returned to work part time when bubs was around 8 months old my hubby was working full time so this was'nt an issue, i have always worked on and off but have not always claimed benefits, until 2004 when i left my husband (for reasons we wont go into) and i was then alone with 2 children and on benefits and moving around quite a lot, it used to annoy the hell out of me when i heard young girls saying i dont have to work i get all the money i need from this lot or working is a mugs game, i have always enjoyed working and have had 2 more children and have worked on and off throughout the years until last year when myself and my ex split i found myself once again alone and on benefits and with a medical condition that was so unstable that i was deemed unable to work which for me was devastating, its also a condition i will always have to declare to any future employer as although i look perfectly healthy on the outside and my condition is'nt obvious it can be debilitating in the worse way, so i now feel that paying out for my BII and public licence 3 years ago could be a waste of money as i did this to enable me to gain better employment prospects and it has been used and i thoroughly enjoyed it too and would love to get back to it but whether future employers allow me to or not remains to be seen

so yup these people who state that they dont or wont work because they dont have to or they are going to have another child so they can stay on benefits really do annoy me as to be honest they are a waste of time and precious resources, not everyone is in that bracket and they're are many different reasons for people to be in the benefit boat its the blatant idle twonks that need reining in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

fair play to you and your girl i only hope i can instill the same values in my girls

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ok so what do people suggest you do with all these young mums who don't give a damm and abuse the system? take their kids off them? cut money given too them? abort babies of single women under a certain age to prevent this from all happening?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OMG, is this the Daily Mail thread? has it been hijacked by UKIP? Swingers, liberal in sex, hate filled in heart it seems

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"ok so what do people suggest you do with all these young mums who don't give a damm and abuse the system? take their kids off them? cut money given too them? abort babies of single women under a certain age to prevent this from all happening?

no we support them and in return they spend every moment we pay them for playing,stimulating, teaching, loving, guiding and raising them to be the best they can.

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By *amnationsedgeMan
over a year ago

Ashborne

I consider scrounging pathetic. Its a little hypocritical since I'm jobless but that is a result of mental disability and I would honestly sacrifice every advantage I'm given if I didn't have to live with this disability.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Officially 2 and a half Million unemployed. half a million jobs in economy. Unofficially 4 million unemployed, half a million jobs in economy. Nobody bothered that this thread reads like a hate filled manifesto cooked up by Thatcher in her senile dementia?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Officially 2 and a half Million unemployed. half a million jobs in economy. Unofficially 4 million unemployed, half a million jobs in economy. Nobody bothered that this thread reads like a hate filled manifesto cooked up by Thatcher in her senile dementia?"

I have balanced my _iews with a thumbs up to all single mums and dads who role model the best for their kids.

I have said to instil a work ethic to their kids is a great thing

I have said we support the single mums and dads who are in this situation to give to their kids the best start in life and sow the seeds for aspirations in life greater than 'opening their legs to succeed'

To spend the maximum time they have with their kids rather than plomping them down in front of the telly most of the day whilst I am on facebook or on a sex site telling folks 'i am flicking my clitty' or 'rubbing my cock' to stimulate attention.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Scenario!!

A single girl of 21 has a child, she decides to spend the childs formative years at home and BOND with her child!! I.E. The first 5-7 years!

Now, according to all you (i work so should she) people out there, she is a scrounger!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Scenario!!

A single girl of 21 has a child, she decides to spend the childs formative years at home and BOND with her child!! I.E. The first 5-7 years!

Now, according to all you (i work so should she) people out there, she is a scrounger!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread's gonna make me late for work so I'll keep it short!

I'm wary of topics like this because the first thing most people say is "take the benefits away." From what some have told me, it's not a lot of money. I don't know as I (touch wood) never had to use them. Sadly, for some they need them due to circumstances and for some they're happy to accept them and live that way as they have no ambition to do much else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bring back national service when teenagers leave school. They will learn respect and a trade.. Then we might teach the next generation of adults to

work....

I agree now that I am too old for it.."
why should my son do national service ? He has respect it's ok for to say do n/ s ur a age that has missed bet u wouldn't want it if r was 15. Just coz so many teenagers are little shits mine ent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bring back national service when teenagers leave school. They will learn respect and a trade.. Then we might teach the next generation of adults to

work....

I agree now that I am too old for it.. why should my son do national service ? He has respect it's ok for to say do n/ s ur a age that has missed bet u wouldn't want it if r was 15. Just coz so many teenagers are little shits mine ent"

Ye teach em respect like all those soldiers living on the streets, in mental health care, maimed etc. Ruin another generation of people in the name of a shit idea called wars

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work? "

No, neither does sitting at home 24/7 on others people money while some sneer make for perfect role mothers either!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

No, neither does sitting at home 24/7 on others people money while some sneer make for perfect role mothers either!"

It is that cocept of 'other peoples money' that really gates doesn't it. News for you. It isn't your money, it is the states. Do I moan when the obese/smokers/drinkers take hundreds if thousands of pounds of care out of the NHS? Bit more than a single mother or ten. I'll do a deal with all the Daily Mailers on here, you stop smoking, drinking, eating garbage, take care of your bodies, get fit etc and I'll agree single mums and their kids should be locked up/starved or whatever else you ghouls have in mind.

How much does it cost to treat someone who has made themselves diabetic?? anyone know for long term care?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I chose to stay at home with my son, however no benefits where claimed except child allowance that every one gets. But when he was about 10 months old i went to college and had a partime job. I have nothing against single parents that are working or staying at home, either is fine in my book if you can afford to look after your child and not have a child and live on benefits.

What i would do with the parents mentioned would be to put them on training courses ready to get back to work and i think most colleges or places you study have brilliant creches.

As i said i have nothing against single parents except those that are happy to sit back and take benefits because they decide they are special and dont need to work. If you want to stay at home with a child great, if you have enough of your own finances to look after them

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Bring back national service when teenagers leave school. They will learn respect and a trade.. Then we might teach the next generation of adults to

work....

ask the guy who suggested it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Scenario!!

A single girl of 21 has a child, she decides to spend the childs formative years at home and BOND with her child!! I.E. The first 5-7 years!

Now, according to all you (i work so should she) people out there, she is a scrounger!!!

As I read it, this thread had less to do with mothering, love and nurturing and more to do with a number of people who use a child as a means to an end.

I have a close relation who does exactly that, so can confirm that it does happen.

Now, OK, so she didn't plan the child, but I have no doubt that she mothers, loves and nufrtures her.

That said, the child is most definately used as an excuse not to work and to maximise benefits.

She has a long term partner who does not live with her full time despite being in a relationship for 5 years - in order to get single mothers allowances, housing benefits etc

Now the child is 7, there is suddenly talk of a second child.

Coincidence ? or a way of being able to claim for the next 8 years once child number 1 reaches the age where benefits drop ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I chose to stay at home with my son, however no benefits where claimed except child allowance that every one gets. But when he was about 10 months old i went to college and had a partime job. I have nothing against single parents that are working or staying at home, either is fine in my book if you can afford to look after your child and not have a child and live on benefits.

What i would do with the parents mentioned would be to put them on training courses ready to get back to work and i think most colleges or places you study have brilliant creches.

OK, well you should only have kids when you have enough money to pay for their education then also? shall we keep extending it?? health, pay for that before you have kids. Nobody outside the rich can afford to 'look after their own kids', it would be prohibitively expensive, hence why we have developed socialised care, education and health.

Single Mums are single because dads have been appalling in many cases, so perhaps the mothers should be allowed to look after their children, supported by the state and the father being forced to work in a job provided by the state, paying a decent wage with a _iew to ingraining responsibilty. Woamn not punished, children not punished, men made better by compulsion. There's an idea. or will people moan it will cost money to create jobs?

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

No, neither does sitting at home 24/7 on others people money while some sneer make for perfect role mothers either!

How much does it cost to treat someone who has made themselves diabetic?? anyone know for long term care?"

and swingers whose increased partners runs a higher than it would be risk if they weren't and attendance at sexual health clinics... it is all cost after all.

and includes US ALL on here rather than popping at groups than we are not in

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By *ucsparkMan
over a year ago

dudley

I am a single dad, always worked and provided all that a parent needs too, shelter, food, love and understanding. I still do it now and are registered disabled, so if I can I cannot understand why everyone else shouldn't try. Stop handouts and give a hand up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

No, neither does sitting at home 24/7 on others people money while some sneer make for perfect role mothers either!

How much does it cost to treat someone who has made themselves diabetic?? anyone know for long term care?

and swingers whose increased partners runs a higher than it would be risk if they weren't and attendance at sexual health clinics... it is all cost after all.

and includes US ALL on here rather than popping at groups than we are not in"

truly ridiculous point.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

What i would do with the parents mentioned would be to put them on training courses ready to get back to work and i think most colleges or places you study have brilliant creches.

My post wasnt directed at all single mums, there is lots of reasons people have to claim benefits. My responce was about the op over hearing two women boasting about it. Not single mothers/or fathers in general

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am a single dad, always worked and provided all that a parent needs too, shelter, food, love and understanding. I still do it now and are registered disabled, so if I can I cannot understand why everyone else shouldn't try. Stop handouts and give a hand up

im fortunate to live in a country that allows me the chance to stay at home for the first few years. its a choice given to me by the government

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

No, neither does sitting at home 24/7 on others people money while some sneer make for perfect role mothers either!

How much does it cost to treat someone who has made themselves diabetic?? anyone know for long term care?

and swingers whose increased partners runs a higher than it would be risk if they weren't and attendance at sexual health clinics... it is all cost after all.

and includes US ALL on here rather than popping at groups than we are not in

truly ridiculous point."

in your opinion and that is perfectly fine.

if I had an inkling of respect for you and/or your posts, I may give it a nano second of reconsideration. I don't.

enjoy your day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wow i read all this and it makes me laugh but then you don't know any different. @ least you have the option of working or not working, where i come from, your only option is to work or u starve!!!

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

i read these types of posts and i despair at times..

what happened to humanity with some people?

such bitterness and ignorance tbh..

sad..

all i ever see in my local cafe is elvis composing songs with buddy holly..

honest its totally true, not making it up at all..

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"so in order to be a great role model to a child you have to work?

No, neither does sitting at home 24/7 on others people money while some sneer make for perfect role mothers either!

How much does it cost to treat someone who has made themselves diabetic?? anyone know for long term care?"

You are missing the point!

I could care less how many kids some illiterate wants to dump into the world. I could care less if they stay at home watching Jeremy Kyle while I work to support them.

What annoys me is the sneering, that they are "good mums" because they stay at home whilst those of us that use nurseries are some how lesser mothers.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

What i would do with the parents mentioned would be to put them on training courses ready to get back to work and i think most colleges or places you study have brilliant creches.

Personally, I don't even mind supporting them, it's the sneering attitude that gets my goat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It is that cocept of 'other peoples money' that really gates doesn't it. News for you. It isn't your money, it is the states. Do I moan when the obese/smokers/drinkers take hundreds if thousands of pounds of care out of the NHS? Bit more than a single mother or ten. I'll do a deal with all the Daily Mailers on here, you stop smoking, drinking, eating garbage, take care of your bodies, get fit etc

It is Tax payers money that is paid to the state and is not intended for single females to just breed and sponge until the well is dry.

I stopped smoking I have the odd very restricted drink, I do not eat gargbage foods and getting fit well that just throws me into the clutches of the NHS A+E. I have worked for over 40 years and now the state will not provide because my diet does not include anything made from wheat, rye barley or oats and that includes derivatives.I suffer Osteoporosis/osteopena, lytic lesions and have degenerative disease in my lumbar sine and both hips walking/breathing difficulties. I suffer high blood pressure because being subjected to contamination and legal allergens that keep me ill legally so no benefits for me. Who gives a toss the money is required for single mums (and they are not all bad).

Him..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Erm, excuse me! I don't like how this thread is called 'single mums' as though you're talking about the majority...

Also, what about the fathers in these situations? Have you thought about their share of the responsibility too? I hate to see so much judgement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also, what about the fathers in these situations? Have you thought about their share of the responsibility too? I hate to see so much judgement"

The father's have responsibility to the mother as well as the child and its about time the state caught up with the absent fathers and made them contribute. As long as the single mum remembers who the father might be! which is not always the case so will not be addressed.

To some its a career choice work or kids.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The bottom line is is that it is a welfare state not charity.

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By *eaverfeverCouple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"Scenario!!

A single girl of 21 has a child, she decides to spend the childs formative years at home and BOND with her child!! I.E. The first 5-7 years!

Now, according to all you (i work so should she) people out there, she is a scrounger!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A single girl of 21 has a child, she decides to spend the childs formative years at home and BOND with her child!! I.E. The first 5-7 years"

So who funds this choice?

If I cannot afford to buy a car can I have one given to me at someone else expence. Having children is a choice, getting old/sick/disabled is not, more needs to be spent in these other areas.

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By *eaverfeverCouple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

Yes but what if you get sick through a choice to smoke,eat fatty foods,drink alcohol??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes but what if you get sick through a choice to smoke,eat fatty foods,drink alcohol??"

We all have a choice in how we live our lives, smoking is very much on the way out, eating fatty foods lets shut the fast food shops and get people taking responsibility for the food intake, charge these fat people double on buses/planes anywhere where they require two seats. Alcohol is I believe being addressed as it is to easy and cheap to buy.

You forgot to mention the illegal use of drugs.

Overall the welfare state seems to be funding all the wrong things these days but is stopping funding those who need help. Seems about right for this country in todays world of golden handshakes for failure etc etc

The thread was about single mums why deviate? to easy