FabSwingers.com forum: Worst delivery company

By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Is there any worse delivery company in existence than Hermes? I think not. In fact, I do hereby cogitate that they would probably struggle to locate their own arses with both hands and a flashlight.

Can anyone here propose a challenger for Hermes ‘service’?

Please feel free to swear excessively....

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By *ucy baileyCouple
over a year ago

North Cambridgeshire

Struggling to think of any that are as crap as Hermes ... absolute wank, many a cocked up delivery experience sadly

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

Oh, I'd throw Yodel into the mix.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there any worse delivery company in existence than Hermes? I think not. In fact, I do hereby cogitate that they would probably struggle to locate their own arses with both hands and a flashlight.

Can anyone here propose a challenger for Hermes ‘service’?

Please feel free to swear excessively....

Never had a problem not once had my Hermes driver bringing the parcels for several years. He’s amazing all companies have good and bad issues with their service. Think your being unfair mate maybe order or from a site that use another courier company or choose an alternative to send parcels. Simple no need to come on a SEX site to bitch.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

yes. Cant remember the name it wasnt onr i was familiar with.

I had been waiting for an item for ages so phoned up the company and they said it had been delivered. After many questions they phoned up the delivery people after a lot of toing and froing and speaking to manages they located my parcel in a shop two miles away. Id had no note through the door text or email. It was just randomly left there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yodel, have had some shocking experiences with them. They seems to screw it up before it gets to me but then actual delivery, when it finally arrives, and drivers generally okay.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"Oh, I'd throw Yodel into the mix....."
thats the name of the comoany i just couldnt think of

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there any worse delivery company in existence than Hermes? I think not. In fact, I do hereby cogitate that they would probably struggle to locate their own arses with both hands and a flashlight.

Can anyone here propose a challenger for Hermes ‘service’?

Please feel free to swear excessively....

This is a forum for open chat. Anyone can say what they like within the rules. If everyone took your attitude, there’d be no one discussing anything

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

UPS! They're bastards. In my old job, only the technicians could sign for the medical equipment they were returning and the UPS guys would always give us crap about it and try to pressure us to sign for it instead of waiting the whole 2 minutes it took a technician to walk out from the back. In my current job the items they deliver to us I have to physically see before I'm allowed to sign for it. An absolute bellend UPS guy tried to get me to sign for it when he'd left it in the entrance foyer downstairs. I was willing to walk down with him to check it before signing for it but he stormed past me and said he was going to say I refused delivery and picked it back up and took it back to his van with him. My boss phoned the company and the same guy rather sheepishly delivered it the next day and even brought it upstairs for us. I also had a UPS guy when I lived at uni who used to post the "we missed you" cards without even knocking and I'd end up chasing him down the road as my room was next to the front door.

DPD and Fedex on the other hand have always been perfectly pleasant.

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By *inchyorksMan
over a year ago

huddersfield

Tuffnels!!

Broke the first parcel, lost the second, managed to deliver the third but left in in a bad place, not where asked, then a week later the second one that had gone missing then was delivered.

But i was window bottoms and 5m long so not something i could use again, it took the three weeks to pick up and return!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As soon as I saw the thread heading instantly thought Hermes ha ha

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By *oson-BlueCouple
over a year ago

North Kent

I thought "Hermes" before even opening the thread, I've had minor gripes with other couriers, but Hermes is the only one that's actually managed to make me angry.

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

Spare a thought for the people that work for them. Under intolerable pressure with poor pay.

Most now owned by US corporations.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I for one appreciate what hermes and yodel do, I had a hermes delivery driver come to my house during lockdown.

I thanked him so much for being an essential worker and I swear he had tears in his eyes as he drop kicked my package into the neighbours garden and threw a 'sorry you weren't in' ticket into my hedge

No but seriously they are a bit shit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hermes are crap nationwide then lol !! That’s an achievement

yodel are piss poor as well .

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

A 'signed' for parcel was not delivered. Queried this with Myhermes and they showed me a signature. It was just a 'tick' mark. Myself and neighbours did not sign for this. It never turned up and no card was put through letter box. They are cheap for a reason.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there any worse delivery company in existence than Hermes? I think not. In fact, I do hereby cogitate that they would probably struggle to locate their own arses with both hands and a flashlight.

Can anyone here propose a challenger for Hermes ‘service’?

Please feel free to swear excessively....

I've not had an issue using them to send parcels, receiving had a damaged item but I got a refund.

Pretty sure this is a swinging site, not a sex site.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Hermes for sure. They managed to completely trash one of my customer's Avon order so badly that it couldn't be delivered to her or returned to Avon. God knows how they managed to achieve this!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Historically I would say Herpes, but standards are dropping for all of them. I get regular DPD and Amazon deliveries. Last week I had one from Amazon that had clearly been drop kicked against a hard surface. Fortunately the item inside wasn't damaged. It's not unusual for stuff to just get left on the doorstep even when it's supposed to be signed for.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Historically I would say Herpes, but standards are dropping for all of them. I get regular DPD and Amazon deliveries. Last week I had one from Amazon that had clearly been drop kicked against a hard surface. Fortunately the item inside wasn't damaged. It's not unusual for stuff to just get left on the doorstep even when it's supposed to be signed for."

Herpes

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I do like playing the guessing game of where they have hidden my delivery. Especially when they tick left in porch as i dont have a porvh. Once i accidently found a parcel in the shed hidden in the shed. I would never have found it if i hadnt been looking in there for something else

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Update: So I see from Hermes website that my parcel is out for delivery and due to arrive today.......on the 10th November(!!!)

I rang the company and spoke to a lovely robot who after about five minutes informs me that my package is delayed (Really?! No fucking shit!)

I can only logically assume therefore that the delivery person must have opted to deliver my package on foot......and may have decided to swim part of the way down the English Channel...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm currently waiting for a next day urgent delivery from DX delivery. I have a tracking number....'great' I think, I can have an idea of when it will arrive and make sure I am in, or get a neighbour to take it if I'm on school run. All the tracking says is 'With courier. To be delivered today'

Helpful.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yodel driver threw a motorbike headlight unit over my gate and it bounced off the door before hitting the ground.

I opened the door to see what the noise was and he waved as he drove off.

Wankers

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

My experience:

DPD - good

Hermes - good (we’ve had same delivery driver for years and can’t fault her)

UPS - shit

Yodel - nobody seems to use them around here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yodel- mysterious package deliveries that never happened.

Hermes, stuff always broken or stinking of smoke

A mixed review of one occurrence where hermes tried to deliver while we were fucking, heard us from outside, opened our front door and left our package in our front porch, pissed off because he let himself in. Happy that he didn't interrupt

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

And the winner by a country mile is UPS

Undelivered Parcel Service.

Total and utter Shite.

Got to say Hermes are excellent by us but then we are friends with the courier.

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By *aughty_Smooth_OperatorMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Top dog is DPD I say well tracked always choose them pay that extra for next day otherwise stuck with the rubbish ones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hermes, Yodel, UPS and Fedex are all appauling

Customer service is non-existant if things go awry

DPD are streets ahead of the competition

I speak as a despatcher as opposed to a receiver of parcels

We send out about 500 a day at work and I have to assist in putting it right when it goes wrong

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

Sending shipments to the U.S.A. I cannot fault UPS but for UK they are a disaster.

Have been using Hermes for nearly 8 years with very few minor complaints over that time. Problem I have found of late is that is impossible to speak to a human being, just a bloody robot.

I have had the same Hermes courier since I started using them, she is brilliant, we have an agreed safe place(for parcels that is

) and if there is a problem she will call me.

In all fairness to Hermes with 18000 couriers out there they are bound to have a few rotten apples in the barrel.

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By *rben112Man
over a year ago

worcester

"UPS! They're bastards. In my old job, only the technicians could sign for the medical equipment they were returning and the UPS guys would always give us crap about it and try to pressure us to sign for it instead of waiting the whole 2 minutes it took a technician to walk out from the back. In my current job the items they deliver to us I have to physically see before I'm allowed to sign for it. An absolute bellend UPS guy tried to get me to sign for it when he'd left it in the entrance foyer downstairs. I was willing to walk down with him to check it before signing for it but he stormed past me and said he was going to say I refused delivery and picked it back up and took it back to his van with him. My boss phoned the company and the same guy rather sheepishly delivered it the next day and even brought it upstairs for us. I also had a UPS guy when I lived at uni who used to post the "we missed you" cards without even knocking and I'd end up chasing him down the road as my room was next to the front door.

DPD and Fedex on the other hand have always been perfectly pleasant. "

That’s shocking. I would be banging your door down

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Never once had a problem with Hermes and have got to know the driver well over the years.

DPD are always professional and spot on time even providing an hour timeslot they'll arrive on the morning of the delivery.

Yodel only experienced once and that was a nightmare - put in a complaint and the driver left three large boxes on the doorstep, in the rain, because no-one was in - driver was sent round to "resolve the issue" - knocked on the door at 9.30pm tried to tell me he'd left the boxes somewhere he hadn't and then confessed he'd been covering for a mate and would lose his job if anyone found out!!

Amazon I mostly don't have an issue with apart from their policy of putting their products in ridiculously oversized boxes - just today I had two ties delivered in a box big enough to fit a large briefcase and have room left over!!

The thing is though all of these couriers are on zero hours contracts, expected to deliver their quota of parcels in a certain timeframe or they get fined for non-delivery, if they don't deliver a parcel they are expected to keep going back until they have delivered it, at their own expense or they get fined so you can understand some of them looking for shortcuts - it's not the drivers I have a problem with but the shady processes of the companies they work for

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

DHL

Drop it

Hide it

Lose it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Amazon are pretty useless around here. Honestly they just lob the parcel and do a runner. It's even worse when you open the door and they throw the fucking parcel at your feet.

Hermes are great around here most of the time.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Oh another UPS classic is saying there's nobody in when I have things delivered to my work! I bloody wish there was nobody in UPS!!!

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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago

carrbrook stalybridge

"DHL

Drop it

Hide it

Lose it"

Dropped

parcels

Daily

herpes

United

parcel

smashers

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By *mnipotent_BehemothMan
over a year ago

near Merry Hill shopping centre

Try living somewhere that’s mildly difficult to access, 3T weight restriction in my case, Royal Mail, great, Hermes great but down to our local guy if he isn’t on bit variable, Tufnell ok can’t get truck up the Lane but calls when they are at the bottom, but UPS just shit, and don’t start me on DPD I dread when someone says they are delivering via DPD Considering they are part of the German post office they are beyond crap.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Many years ago I sent some parcels out to clients of the company I worked. They went by Parcel Force and they literally lost half of all the packages we sent out (and yes, we worked out it was 50%). They were shop display stands. One of our customers said they received castors (wheels)!

I don't know if they have improved or how they compare with Hermes, but at the time I think they must have beaten off all competition in the national Being Shit at Delivering Stuff awards.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Easyjet. The fuckers were meant to deliver me to 2 destinations this year bud couldn't manage it, nor did they manage a refund. Bustards

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By *htcMan
over a year ago

Having used nearly all couriers at work, we send alot and receive alot, yodel is the worst. Hermes has changed alot over the past year and is pretty good now.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Easyjet. The fuckers were meant to deliver me to 2 destinations this year bud couldn't manage it, nor did they manage a refund. Bustards

Get them to bring you to Devon soon please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hermes.....by far

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is there any worse delivery company in existence than Hermes? I think not. In fact, I do hereby cogitate that they would probably struggle to locate their own arses with both hands and a flashlight.

Can anyone here propose a challenger for Hermes ‘service’?

Please feel free to swear excessively....

Well said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Both Yodel and Hermes used to be terrible in my area.

A few years ago a new Yodel driver started doing the deliveries around here and he’s spot on; gets stuff here on time and delivers it carefully.

Hermes have also suddenly got better. We almost always used to get missed delivery notes from them even when we were in, also had a parcel put in the recycling bin

The last four or five deliveries from them have been absolutely fine, though.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*

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By *reat me rightWoman
over a year ago

Rotherham

Hermes all the way for me they once lost over 800 with of parcels for me and, despite being sent the evidence of sales/amounts/ pics of boxes with addresses etc they only ever paid me out 75

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*"

Update... My lovense toy has now arrived in perfect condition, just charging it up mmmm.

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*

Update... My lovense toy has now arrived in perfect condition, just charging it up mmmm. "

I’m still waiting on mine

(Er....not a toy I should add...)

Have fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*

Update... My lovense toy has now arrived in perfect condition, just charging it up mmmm. "

Genuine question, if I had a lovense in, can hubby control from the other side of the country when he’s away? How does it work?xx

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*

Update... My lovense toy has now arrived in perfect condition, just charging it up mmmm.

Genuine question, if I had a lovense in, can hubby control from the other side of the country when he’s away? How does it work?xx"

Yes, it can be controlled by a phone app, pc or via tablets. Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*

Update... My lovense toy has now arrived in perfect condition, just charging it up mmmm.

Genuine question, if I had a lovense in, can hubby control from the other side of the country when he’s away? How does it work?xx

Yes, it can be controlled by a phone app, pc or via tablets. Xxx"
.

Thank you kindly, seems I’ve some shopping to do

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

I think it depends on where you live really, Our Hermes guy is ace & always leaves stuff in sensible places out of the weather etc. but they were crap in Essex.

Yodel here are awful, I won't use them but no control when buying. they've been here three times broke one item & knocked the corner of our dry stone wall down twice turning around a silly little van when we get guys turning oil delivery trucks around with no problems.

Still, least i'm slowly learning the dying art of drystone walling

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*

Update... My lovense toy has now arrived in perfect condition, just charging it up mmmm.

Genuine question, if I had a lovense in, can hubby control from the other side of the country when he’s away? How does it work?xx

Yes, it can be controlled by a phone app, pc or via tablets. Xxx.

Thank you kindly, seems I’ve some shopping to do

xx"

Testing time tobight lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be careful this time of year if ordering from abroad, it won't mention when buying of from abroad that there could be a custom charge, you might think you've got a deal until you get hit with that by your courier

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Expecting one frome herpes today.. *gulp*

Update... My lovense toy has now arrived in perfect condition, just charging it up mmmm.

Genuine question, if I had a lovense in, can hubby control from the other side of the country when he’s away? How does it work?xx

Yes, it can be controlled by a phone app, pc or via tablets. Xxx.

Thank you kindly, seems I’ve some shopping to do

Testing time tobight lol

Do let me know if it’s any good xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had no problem with Hermes, or yodel, in fact the delivery guy asked if we’d got our parcel ok last week as he was off but remembered putting it in the van the day before x

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By *mmabluTV/TS
over a year ago

upton wirral

"Is there any worse delivery company in existence than Hermes? I think not. In fact, I do hereby cogitate that they would probably struggle to locate their own arses with both hands and a flashlight.

Can anyone here propose a challenger for Hermes ‘service’?

Please feel free to swear excessively....

"
Hermes are thevworst definately

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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago

Maidstone

Interesting to see some people getting good service from Hermes. From my experience, I find that staggering!

I've been seriously online shopping waaaay before we ever heard the word Coronavirus and Hermes consistently the worst! I've had lost deliveries, so seller had to refund. Badly damaged items, so seller had to send another. Items left outside a public entrance to my apartment block.

Tonight there is a local paper online article about a Hermes delivery guy videoed chucking parcels over garden fence!

I know a guy who manages warehouse distribution centres and he reckons Hermes is going to go under soon as he's predicting Hermes will have a meltdown at Christmas.

I've written to Amazon asking them to add Reviews on delivery firms like they do Seller... So we can avoid Hermes like ... the Coronavirus...!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Which is the company with all the delivery guys who keep turning up and fucking people's wives?

I've seen loads of videos. Plumbers too...

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Just wait until Amazon get a UK contract to offer a prescription delivery service to your door... jeez the shit will hit the fan with that one when it comes!

Just imagine the size of that box!

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

By the way, I won't be telling drivers what the packaging is like to they can get wank fodder about unsuspecting women receiving their toys. That's just wrong.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Yodel

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

For me, Hermes I have problems more often than not (although there's one delivery driver who is a star, I never have an issue if it's him). Yodel hit and miss. DHL usually good. DPD always brilliant.

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By *ig_eric_tionMan
over a year ago

IPSWICH

I think Yodel and Hermes are basically the same company. The service is uncannily bad from both.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not one mention of royal mail

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By *amanthaJonesTrans1966TV/TS
over a year ago

Portsmouth

"Is there any worse delivery company in existence than Hermes? I think not. In fact, I do hereby cogitate that they would probably struggle to locate their own arses with both hands and a flashlight.

Can anyone here propose a challenger for Hermes ‘service’?

Please feel free to swear excessively....

I have never had any problems with Hermes both packages I've sent off or items arriving, but I have experienced bad things with DPD, had a package left at a flower shop a mile away, found out he does it a lot, he got my address mixed up with another address, if there's a shop nearby which he knows he can leave parcels at, he will leave half a dozen or so and put a card through the door saying he's knocked when he clearly hasn't because he is too lazy to wait a minute or so, I put in a official complaint and so did the sender of the parcel, because the item was actually a present for my partners birthday.

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By *amanthaJonesTrans1966TV/TS
over a year ago

Portsmouth

I have also seen myself 2 DPD drivers, transferring packages from one van to another and literally throwing people's packages in the back of the van, I even filmed it and put it on social media about a year ago, if you have anything expensive or fragile, then do not use DPD, yes it might only be a local issue, just like UPS OR Hermes etc, I always send items well packed and protected, and always pay for complete coverage to the value, so if it does get damaged, I get the full refund

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By * Plus ECouple
over a year ago

The South

DHL

Even their own staff call them Drop it, Hide it, Lose it.

Shocking in my experience.

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By *hatYorkLadMan
over a year ago

York

Herpes are awful but locally I've had an improvement since a different guy took over the route. It was previously a Polish chap who had a bad habit of posting "sorry you weren't in" cards through the door and scarpering despite the fact I'd specifically stayed in on numerous occasions waiting for timed deliveries.

I rang him on the number on the card once as he'd literally just posted a card and driven off, he started getting aggressive saying he knocked three times and rang the doorbell which was a blatant lie as I was sat there waiting for my delivery! I eventually got my parcel that I'd paid for Saturday delivery on the following Wednesday. No idea why they do that unless they get paid extra for redeliveries and it's a bit of a money spinner they've got going...

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