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Arrogance or Confidence

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

There is a difference but it's not always clear to some.

How can you tell the difference between a confident or arrogant person ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By the way they treat other people, obviously.

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By *iggBadDaveMan
over a year ago

Ards

Definitely a fine balance , very hard to tell from a few messages on here.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Arrogance is rare in my experience. Confidence is not commonly appreciated so people tend to call it arrogance.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"There is a difference but it's not always clear to some.

How can you tell the difference between a confident or arrogant person ?"

Confidence, I think, is being comfortable in your own skin.

Arrogance implies feeling that you're better than others or simply being self-absorbed.

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Confident people are happy with who they are and can admit to their faults. Arrogant people need to convince people who they are and portray they have no weakness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They are the same thing. Anyone who openly admits to any more than an ounce of confidence is arrogant and big headed.

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove


"They are the same thing. Anyone who openly admits to any more than an ounce of confidence is arrogant and big headed. "

I am a very confident person. As a poster said earlier, the difference between confidence and arrogance is how you treat people. I put most people's needs before mine

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

There’s a fine line but if you are under the impression that you are any better than anyone else you are most definitely arrogant and it’s such a turn off

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"They are the same thing. Anyone who openly admits to any more than an ounce of confidence is arrogant and big headed. "

I disagree. I think you can be both things at once - but being confident in, say, my professional abilities doesn't make me arrogant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I put every bodies needs and feelings before my own yet I’m branded as arrogant. Load of bull shit if you ask me.

In real world situations you’d know who was arrogant. It would be the person who thinks they’re better than you, someone who says yes I can do that without even knowing what it is. It’s the person that’s always late because they believe the world waits for them. The person who always has to be right. The person who always interrupts you, always thinks that they are the only person who can do a task even though someone else could be better trained for it. Someone who doesn’t believe they have any faults or can accept criticism.

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By *stroboy78Man
over a year ago

Abergavenny

I often get called arrogant when women approach me if I'm out in town, actually they have done it in shops as well thinking about it lol.

The sad part is its neither arrogance nor confidence, its crippling shyness combined with a sense of "why is she bothering to talk to me, she's stunning". So I think to myself let's not waste anyones time here so I make polite small talk and walk off. It drives my mates mad when I do it but I have no idea what to say. Such is life. I've said before I have never ever, not once 'chatted up' a woman in my life hah wouldnt know where to start lol.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Arrogance is based on not even considering the other person's opinion, knowledge or capability - it literally means "without asking".

Confidence literally means having faith (eg in oneself)

The former is often based on inner insecurities, the latter on self belief or belief in a process.

This is why arrogance tends to be an undesirable behaviour whereas confidence is part of knowing where you want to be or get to.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"They are the same thing. Anyone who openly admits to any more than an ounce of confidence is arrogant and big headed. "

And must certainly be taken down a peg or two. Meanwhile anyone who lacks confidence must be built up to a level where it's possible to take them down a peg or two.

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By *ent in BlackMan
over a year ago

Silsden


"By the way they treat other people, obviously. "

This, arrogant people don’t have much empathy, whilst confident people do.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Can be a fine line, and depends on who's labelling.

I think the difference is a) whether the confidence is regarded as deserved, and b) the extent to which confidence is seen as competition.

It can also be cultural, so I may find certain people too abrasive and upfront because I come from a culture big on self deprecation and cutting down those getting ideas above themselves ("tall poppy syndrome" is real )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Arrogance is rare in my experience. Confidence is not commonly appreciated so people tend to call it arrogance."

Ting ting ting... we have a winner.

I’m a very confident man but I am extremely respectful of everyone.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Just a thought... maybe it would be good to draw a line between arrogance/ arrogant behaviour as not every arrogant behaviour means the person IS arrogant in all ways?

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Just a thought... maybe it would be good to draw a line between arrogance/ arrogant behaviour as not every arrogant behaviour means the person IS arrogant in all ways? "

Definitely true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They are the same thing. Anyone who openly admits to any more than an ounce of confidence is arrogant and big headed.

I am a very confident person. As a poster said earlier, the difference between confidence and arrogance is how you treat people. I put most people's needs before mine "

I don't think that really highlights the difference

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I know I'm good at my job, my results speak for themselves. That may come across as arrogant, doesn't mean I'm an arrogant person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Arrogance is simply self-confidence that is overdone. We tend to overdo our strengths when we feel insecure about other aspects of our lives or in difficult situations or conflict. We overdo it by using our strength too frequently, for too long, too intensely or in the wrong circumstances. We also tend to see traits in others that we dislike in ourselves or things that we don’t value.

Self-awareness is the main route to managing overdone strengths like arrogance, by understanding when and why we behave in that way.

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By *offiaCoolWoman
over a year ago

Kidsgrove


"They are the same thing. Anyone who openly admits to any more than an ounce of confidence is arrogant and big headed.

I am a very confident person. As a poster said earlier, the difference between confidence and arrogance is how you treat people. I put most people's needs before mine

I don't think that really highlights the difference "

It makes sense to me

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By *amie HantsWoman
over a year ago

Atlantis

I don’t understand why it is being treated as such a high taboo to be arrogant.

We’re all guilty of being arrogant at some point in our lives. The same way we can all be selfish, petulant and self absorbed. It doesn’t mean we’re an automatic write off forna person and it doesn’t mean we have to be/are that way all the time. People are multi dimensional, and we can all be shit bags from time to time. I think having the minerals to own up to bad behaviour says a lot about a character.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"I don’t understand why it is being treated as such a high taboo to be arrogant.

We’re all guilty of being arrogant at some point in our lives. The same way we can all be selfish, petulant and self absorbed. It doesn’t mean we’re an automatic write off forna person and it doesn’t mean we have to be/are that way all the time. People are multi dimensional, and we can all be shit bags from time to time. I think having the minerals to own up to bad behaviour says a lot about a character. "

Well said.

Arrogance isn't a trait I like but I don't like procrastination and untidiness in other people and they're two of my worst characteristics (there are many more ). Arrogance of over confidence is something that is generally frowned on though because as a society the British prefer low esteem and self depreciation.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland


"

Arrogance isn't a trait I like but I don't like procrastination and untidiness in other people and they're two of my worst characteristics (there are many more ). Arrogance of over confidence is something that is generally frowned on though because as a society the British prefer low esteem and self depreciation."

I completely get this - the very things that irritate me in others, are traits I have myself.

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By *uvhandle20Man
over a year ago

SE London


"There is a difference but it's not always clear to some.

How can you tell the difference between a confident or arrogant person ?"

In the way they treat other people and present themselves.

Confident people don't need to tell everybody how good they are, they also know their weaknesses. Arrogant people need constant confirmation and admiration from others, regardless if this is justified or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t understand why it is being treated as such a high taboo to be arrogant.

We’re all guilty of being arrogant at some point in our lives. The same way we can all be selfish, petulant and self absorbed. It doesn’t mean we’re an automatic write off forna person and it doesn’t mean we have to be/are that way all the time. People are multi dimensional, and we can all be shit bags from time to time. I think having the minerals to own up to bad behaviour says a lot about a character. "

I agree. I also think some of us are more likely to appear arrogant to others based on differences in motives and values. Someone who is motivated by goals and achievement is more likely to be seen as arrogant at times than someone who is motivated to help and protect others. This is particularly likely to occur when people don’t share those motivations or values. It is easier to understand behaviour and be less judgemental of it when we understand where it comes from, We all walk to different drum beats

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t understand why it is being treated as such a high taboo to be arrogant.

We’re all guilty of being arrogant at some point in our lives. The same way we can all be selfish, petulant and self absorbed. It doesn’t mean we’re an automatic write off forna person and it doesn’t mean we have to be/are that way all the time. People are multi dimensional, and we can all be shit bags from time to time. I think having the minerals to own up to bad behaviour says a lot about a character.

Well said.

Arrogance isn't a trait I like but I don't like procrastination and untidiness in other people and they're two of my worst characteristics (there are many more ). Arrogance of over confidence is something that is generally frowned on though because as a society the British prefer low esteem and self depreciation."

Does that mean all the people who call me self absorbed, arrogant and vain are just seeing hidden parts of themselves that they don’t like?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t understand why it is being treated as such a high taboo to be arrogant.

We’re all guilty of being arrogant at some point in our lives. The same way we can all be selfish, petulant and self absorbed. It doesn’t mean we’re an automatic write off forna person and it doesn’t mean we have to be/are that way all the time. People are multi dimensional, and we can all be shit bags from time to time. I think having the minerals to own up to bad behaviour says a lot about a character.

Well said.

Arrogance isn't a trait I like but I don't like procrastination and untidiness in other people and they're two of my worst characteristics (there are many more ). Arrogance of over confidence is something that is generally frowned on though because as a society the British prefer low esteem and self depreciation.

Does that mean all the people who call me self absorbed, arrogant and vain are just seeing hidden parts of themselves that they don’t like?"

Projection is one possible reason.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Arrogance is someone who is full of self importance and has to tell and show constantly that they are superior to everyone else. Some self proclaimed alphas for example.

I do show some traits of arrogance in my work from my position over others and I am attracted to some arrogant men. That and a high level of confidence intrigues me to learn more about their personality

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"They are the same thing. Anyone who openly admits to any more than an ounce of confidence is arrogant and big headed.

And must certainly be taken down a peg or two. Meanwhile anyone who lacks confidence must be built up to a level where it's possible to take them down a peg or two. "

Yep!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I don’t understand why it is being treated as such a high taboo to be arrogant.

We’re all guilty of being arrogant at some point in our lives. The same way we can all be selfish, petulant and self absorbed. It doesn’t mean we’re an automatic write off forna person and it doesn’t mean we have to be/are that way all the time. People are multi dimensional, and we can all be shit bags from time to time. I think having the minerals to own up to bad behaviour says a lot about a character. "

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

As someone else said how u treat others! I am confident! But no way arrogant x

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