FabSwingers.com forum: farting

By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

Do you laugh when you hear people fart?

Any funny stories?

An old female friend of mine was so put off farting infront of her partner, if she needed to do one in bed she used to spread her bum cheeks open so wasnt noisy, surely that makes it louder lol

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

i think its a basic instint to laugh when someone farts lol

my nan was i hospital recently and there ws a woman in the next bed who farted all the time, all of were sat there sniggering

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By *tephen0101Man
over a year ago

York

My x gf used to do the spread cheeks tech, she got it from her best mate...so might be quite common!

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"i think its a basic instint to laugh when someone farts lol

my nan was i hospital recently and there ws a woman in the next bed who farted all the time, all of were sat there sniggering

Pmsl. Quality. Bless her cottons

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By *els_BellsWoman
over a year ago

with the moon n stars somewhere in gtr manc

I try and look disgusted, but my 3 year old stunk out our local shop the other day and shouted "Mummy, I just pumped!" Really made me laugh n gag at the same time

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"I try and look disgusted, but my 3 year old stunk out our local shop the other day and shouted "Mummy, I just pumped!" Really made me laugh n gag at the same time

Kids don't you love em, got that to come yet. Mine only 1 year

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

farting is funny full stop, depending of course on what kind of farts they are, as there are many different kinds of fart

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"My x gf used to do the spread cheeks tech, she got it from her best mate...so might be quite common!"

How did you know that? Did you catch her doin it lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I laugh when I fart... cant help it

...don't find it funny though if someone else does!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They are defo not funny when it's the cat on yer lap!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I laugh when I fart... cant help it

...don't find it funny though if someone else does!

I sometimes fart when I laugh, if that's any help.

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"I laugh when I fart... cant help it

...don't find it funny though if someone else does!

I laugh at any. Although im disgusted if its a sloppy one that sounds like they've just shit! Lol

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

repeater eh?

snigger snigger

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"They are defo not funny when it's the cat on yer lap!"

and cats farts really do stink!

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

repeater eh?

snigger snigger"

True the sound of spunk oozing out of your ass isnt the greatest lol

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By *un_JuiceCouple
over a year ago

Nr Chester

Always remember fondly an evening in the audience of most haunted live I let one fly. A loud tight high pitched drumroll. I kept a straight face and my friend couldn't stop laughing. Of course it raised a few eyebrows.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

repeater eh?

snigger snigger

True the sound of spunk oozing out of your ass isnt the greatest lol"

he he but in that situation you can only take it in fun and have a good giggle, at least it shows you have had a good pumping.

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"Always remember fondly an evening in the audience of most haunted live I let one fly. A loud tight high pitched drumroll. I kept a straight face and my friend couldn't stop laughing. Of course it raised a few eyebrows."

Pmsl, love the way you described that,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I laugh when I fart... cant help it

...don't find it funny though if someone else does!

I sometimes fart when I laugh, if that's any help.

very helpful

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

They make me giggle as much as I hate them!

I heard one the other day at work and could have sworn a swarm of bees had gone past as that was what it sounded like

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman
over a year ago

Deviant City

"I just knock out normal farts & find it funny but if its a fanny or anal fart from sex then I get totally embarrassed.

repeater eh?

snigger snigger

True the sound of spunk oozing out of your ass isnt the greatest lol"

oh its just soooo embarrassing

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"They make me giggle as much as I hate them!

I heard one the other day at work and could have sworn a swarm of bees had gone past as that was what it sounded like

pmsl again.lol. Straight past the honeypot hey. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is one way to win a bet in a pub and that is to say one word that will make people smile / smirk / laugh. 'Fart' does it every time

I posted this on anther Thread but is so funny:

http://youtu.be/09abF7ZUNnk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Church or Chapel let it rattle!

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"There is one way to win a bet in a pub and that is to say one word that will make people smile / smirk / laugh. 'Fart' does it every time

I posted this on anther Thread but is so funny:

http://youtu.be/09abF7ZUNnk"

Well it had me laughing

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By *enithWoman
over a year ago

closer than you think

"There is one way to win a bet in a pub and that is to say one word that will make people smile / smirk / laugh. 'Fart' does it every time

I posted this on anther Thread but is so funny:

http://youtu.be/09abF7ZUNnk"

I was laughing reading this thread

oooops and farted!!!!

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By *tephen0101Man
over a year ago

York

She just told me about it..I farted in bed and the convo just went from there :D

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I try and look disgusted, but my 3 year old stunk out our local shop the other day and shouted "Mummy, I just pumped!" Really made me laugh n gag at the same time

Kids don't you love em, got that to come yet. Mine only 1 year"

Mine still do it and they're 16 & 23 - both male though, so what can I say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My mum always told me that ladies don't 'blow off', 'trump', 'break wind', 'fart' or whatever you like to call it, so I find that I never do

That is with the exception of the sexual "well-pumped" pussy or anal 'air escape'. This can be embarassing enough with your regular partner but when swinging or in a club when there are other people around I just feel as though I want a massive hole to develop in the floor and for me to fall straight through it

Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to get around this particular embarassment? It's not funny when someone has their face in your nether regions and one just pops out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally discusting and uncouth especially in public! Manners of a pig!!

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By *heekychezzaWoman
over a year ago

warrington

"Totally discusting and uncouth especially in public! Manners of a pig!!"

That's a bit harsh isn't it. Someone deliberately letting rip in public is of course bad manners, but believe me, it isn't always a matter of choice

and then it's surely not bad manners.

I too find it highly embarrassing...and have had it happen when playing in a public room in a club

- I just sat up and said "pardon me...what else could I do????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Waaay back in school, I tried to drop a silent one in English..

..only it came out a little bit louder than intended...

.and we were seated on those plastic chairs which sort of amplified it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Farting in the lift just as your about to get out and people are getting in always a good one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My ex used to think farting was foreplay

hence hes my ex!!!

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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago

In Your Bush

And a few spirits I would guess

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"Farting in the lift just as your about to get out and people are getting in always a good one "

Grim.no thanks lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Farting in the lift just as your about to get out and people are getting in always a good one "

Reminds me of one of Peter Sellars funniest outtakes. Him and 3 others were in a scene where they are Mobsters going into a lift. They need an off-set cue for something and someone farts ..

After about 10 outtakes the scene was abandoned ..

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Ok, i beg to differ and on this one I am going to be the odd one out ... I cannot for the life of me see the funny side here, its a bodily function no more, no less. It is slapstick at its most basic in my view. It is the sort of thing we used to laugh at possibly at nursery age?

Sorry to be miserable here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Found a short version ..

http://youtu.be/1TtZgs8k8dU

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By *eaverfever OP Couple
over a year ago

nr Manchester

"Ok, i beg to differ and on this one I am going to be the odd one out ... I cannot for the life of me see the funny side here, its a bodily function no more, no less. It is slapstick at its most basic in my view. It is the sort of thing we used to laugh at possibly at nursery age?

Sorry to be miserable here

its just the sound that makes me laugh regardless of the fact its coming out of your arse, a whoopee cushion makes me laugh to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Totally discusting and uncouth especially in public! Manners of a pig!!

That's a bit harsh isn't it. Someone deliberately letting rip in public is of course bad manners, but believe me, it isn't always a matter of choice

and then it's surely not bad manners.

I too find it highly embarrassing...and have had it happen when playing in a public room in a club

- I just sat up and said "pardon me...what else could I do????"

Yes may well be harsh but its my opinion in an open debate forum! sorry if anyone finds my opinion offensive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Years ago, when out with a boyfriend, I had a dodgy tummy and wind pain, they slowly started to work through and gently, silently and odourlessly slip out, all was fine for a while then the big one came, loud and proud. I immediately said, oh .......( insert random name) that wasn't a nice thing to do and giggled like mad, just after a couple walked out past us and quietly asked if he should leave the door open?! Pmsl I almost died but got away with it to all except the bf!

Stil gets brought up in convos now!

Btw have had a right giggle tonight at some of the stories! Bloody brilliant!

Oh and a few months ago I let a tiny one slip with a fb, he has teased me incessantly ever since, we all do it, get a grip! Lmfao

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By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich

"I try and look disgusted, but my 3 year old stunk out our local shop the other day and shouted "Mummy, I just pumped!" Really made me laugh n gag at the same time

My grandson just grins and shouts "Grandad just farted".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to fart on a super market aisle and duck round the corner then walk back round and look at the person who has walked into the invisible cloud of stench and look them up and down with disgust and walk off shaking my head and them stood there speechless or saying "It wasn't me..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a rare occasion I've managed to sneeze and fart at the same time. And then laugh loudly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the early 90's my ex though it a great idea to serve up brussel sprouts with sliced chesnuts as a side dish for Xmas din-dins.

She also gave our Golden Retreiver, Jasper, some in his Xmas din-dins bowl...

For the rest of Xmas Day we wished she hadn't, and the poor dog sloped off to the kitchen wimpering in a vain effort to get away from the smell.....

Defo wasn't laughing that day....

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By *adja_lazloCouple
over a year ago

Solihull

"On a rare occasion I've managed to sneeze and fart at the same time. And then laugh loudly

Ha"

LOL snarting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

apparently I'm quite good at emptying a room

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If Hitler had farted at Nuremburg... The face of history would have changed forever...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes farting is my favorite pass time. I find it funny when they are mine and watching everyone else trying to get away from it. Nothing better than your own farts but nothing worse than someone else

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By *ove2-shareCouple
over a year ago

South Gloucestershire

"Yes farting is my favorite pass time. I find it funny when they are mine and watching everyone else trying to get away from it. Nothing better than your own farts but nothing worse than someone else

forget the who said it did it or who smelt it dealt it rubbish if you want to pass t off on others just sniff and look at someone as if you think its them, guaranteed someone else will sniff and look where you were looking and assume that person did it, (not that i would ever have done such a thing

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