FabSwingers.com forum: Comparing yourself to others

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is something you see a lot on the posts on here.

I am sure there are plus and minus points in doing so and the actual answer isn't clear cut, BUT overall ....

In swinging terms, is it a good thing or a bad thing ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I compare myself to the woman I see with tanned legs up to their bums and back down again , the wash board tummy and boobs that point North not South. Shame its all in me head

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U mean there are others on here that aren't the same as me????!!!!!! lol

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

I don't get the question Bussy?

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

we all have our imperfections and quirks that make us unique... if we spent more time thinking about the positives than dwelling on the negatives we would probably be alot happier

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"we all have our imperfections and quirks that make us unique... if we spent more time thinking about the positives than dwelling on the negatives we would probably be alot happier "

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I think this is why the TV remote scale was introduced.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is something you see a lot on the posts on here.

I am sure there are plus and minus points in doing so and the actual answer isn't clear cut, BUT overall ....

In swinging terms, is it a good thing or a bad thing ?"

good for me/us

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By *jeasyriderMan
over a year ago

near paisley

bad thing

i am what i am

why i wanna be like some 1 else

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By *WLondonMixMan
over a year ago

Willsden/DollisHill

Swinging _iews often compliment our life _iews, it is natural to compare our selves with other people. Not necessarily in a competitive way, but as a way to find a good compatible meet and is a good way to acknowledge our faults and positives.

Comparisons can only go so far, as someone else stated in this post it is our quirks that make us so unique, also tits that point south tend to look better then perky ones while in doggy, so ill sum up the post, which also applies to the doggy comment it is all down to your _iewpoint.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't get the question Bussy?"

I've read it twice and am feeling the same as I haven't obviously seen people comparing themselves to others. Give us a clue what prompted this one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Comparing ourselves to others we see around us is a natural part of life..... for both men and women.

There isn't any way to get away from it.

I don't think it's helped by the modern media who split us up into demographics to be able to target products and services to (what they see as) individual strata of people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure if I completely get the question either Bussy. But I'll have a go

In swinging terms..urm...

Well, it might mean that you get put off contacting someone cos ya think their previous meets look different to yaself... and ya might be right...but you also might be selling yerself short.

So maybe we should all just contact the folk we fancy and not be scared of a 'No thanks' cos they might say 'Yes please' and be the best meet ever

And if they do say 'No Thanks' ....so feck'n what?

So YES, comparig oneself constantly on Fabs is not a good thing cos you're probably missing out on some great shags

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

I know I'm fabulous as I am so why would I need to make comparisons?

Seriously, I have great self esteem, can take rejection - not all men are my type so I don't assume that simply cos I fancy them that they'll fancy me! I accept who I am with honesty and good humour (I'm no size ten, nor am I still twenty one). Comparisons will only ever lead to depression and damaged self esteem.

Far better to appreciate our differences, admire those we find attractive even if it's not in a sexual way (there are some gorgeous ladies in here but I don't fancy them) and enjoy and accept compliments without looking for the catch - I know the giver may want to get in my knickers, but they don't have to flatter to do that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If everyone thought the same, acted the same and behaved the same then life would be boring.

What some people do would horrify others and wouldn't even register with the next person.

We live in a damned if you, damned if you don't society and each of us is guilty of judging others' behaviour and personalities, that's why there are courts of law, they say what is right and wrong.

Swinging is one of those things that some scorn yet they'll do worse behind closed doors.

Some may class swinging and dogging and even sex its self as disgusting and yet others thrive on it.

Live and let live? It would be nice but can't see it happening.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oooh forgot about posting this

I know it made sense when I posted it this morning.

Not so sure now

Summat must have triggered it !

Think it was down to someone putting themselves down in a thread and saying they couldn't compete with the standard of a potential meets veri's which wasn't the first time I'd seen that kind of thing.

Bussy is now officially more confused than a chameleon that's just fell in a bag of Skittles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is something you see a lot on the posts on here.

I am sure there are plus and minus points in doing so and the actual answer isn't clear cut, BUT overall ....

In swinging terms, is it a good thing or a bad thing ?"

i dont think its good or bad its what works for you

I do it a lot, if a guy mails me and all the other women on his verification list are young/slim etc and basically not in the looks group i fit into then i wont reply as i see no point

I dont care what anyone says someone with several women on therer verification list who are all a size 10 is not going to like me so i see no point in wasting my time talking

I only compair myself to others so i can see who i think i have a better chance of meeting is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oooh forgot about posting this

I know it made sense when I posted it this morning.

Not so sure now

Summat must have triggered it !

Bussy is now officially more confused than a chameleon that's just fell in a bag of Skittles

lol i understood what you ment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We get it and like NN we have turned down meets when we feel a bit intimidated by veris which are from stunners

We do this for fun and it's no fun feeling inferior so we wouldn't go there !

Just cant help but do the comparison ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We get it and like NN we have turned down meets when we feel a bit intimidated by veris which are from stunners

We do this for fun and it's no fun feeling inferior so we wouldn't go there !

Just cant help but do the comparison ?

That is pretty much howe i feel, if i get a message of a guy and the last women he has met is a young, slim lass i cant help but think....why the hells he mailed me? and i do think a lot of guys see any hole as a gole and even tho i know im nothing special at all i dont want to be anyone make do shag and thats how it makes me feel

So if i get a message from a guy whos very good looking or his other meets have been i will say no because when i meet i want to feel good not sat there looking at a guy thinking....why the hell are you here with me! cause i know he could do better

i guess it comes down to confidance, which is some ways i have but i know what i look like and i know my limits and im not about to meet someone who i know wouldnt look twice at me in the streets just because he mailed me on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you mean if you look at a gals/guys veris, then peek at the veri posters profile to see if they have the same attributes you have?

I've done this, and usually found the veri posters are all young, hung adonis types!! I usually send the gal a wee msg anyway in the hopes that she may be feeling like a bit rough that day! Lol,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"bad thing

i am what i am

why i wanna be like some 1 else"

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Perhaps because I am little older and "been there, done that" - I dont compare myself to others. And this is primarily because I dont seek (and never have done) quick fixes and "handsome only" guys - to me wit, intelligence, confidence and humour alongside kindness and genuineness are what makes a guy sexy, his torso, shape of dick, girth etc are just a few additional "nice to have" bits. I guess comparing yourself to others may have something to do with the priorities you are looking for in others - no value or judgment attached. Each to their own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ya know, if I want to meet with someone than I kinda hope we have gotten along and it leeds to sex, so No I dont care who theyve done and dont look at veri's.

Its nsa not a jail term together.

I dont want anyone knowing who I've pounced on and I've known some stunning looking fella's but they had no soh, no intelligence and looked the part but couldnt do the job

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am happy with what I have, and do not see any reason why I would need to compare myself with another person, as I would like to believe I have my unique selling points.

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By *uyuksno1Man
over a year ago

poole

we wake up in the morning after every meet and laugh at the sheer badness of us and think god we r happy wasnt that a great nite comparing ourselves never comes into it x

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Dont think ive ever compared myself to anyone else. I wouldnt turn down someone based on who they have met in the past. If they didnt like the look of me they wouldnt message me. We all like different things. If you lined all the guys i know up in a row i doubt there would be any resemblence between any of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We get it and like NN we have turned down meets when we feel a bit intimidated by veris which are from stunners

We do this for fun and it's no fun feeling inferior so we wouldn't go there !

Just cant help but do the comparison ?

Yup same here. I try to avoid looking at other people's profiles cos I end up feeling inadequate.

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