FabSwingers.com forum: Poorly explain your job

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Explain what you do for a living as obscurely as you can

E.g. I do maths to make colours and shapes move around on a screen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I sit in a chair and make sure people don’t die in a giant bath

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did a lot and now I don’t

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

I abuse a rodent all day (push a mouse around) drawing lines and circles.

I also make liquid plastic into nice shapes.

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

I stare at a screen and type.

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By *P994Man
over a year ago

Travelling

I make 2.4ghz and 5ghz frequencies travel better through the air

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming

I stand in fields looking into the sky, mainly with people in uniform or costume.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I argue with naughty people and put peoples lives back together again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I play all day and tell people what to do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I stick oil in things

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By *all-Eddies QosCouple
over a year ago

wirral

I wander around aimlessly muttering about "those fuckers" on a never ending groundhog Day

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I play all day and tell people what to do"

Management. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im on my feet for 12 hours and accomplish 28000 steps while making sure people don’t go hungry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try not to cough or sneeze around people of a certain age.

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By *inchyorksMan
over a year ago

huddersfield

I make lights bright and music loud!

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By *quirtyMcSquirtyWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I tell people if they can stay or not.

In my job before this one, I screwed people for money!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its shit

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I tell people if they can stay or not.

In my job before this one, I screwed people for money!"

A lawyer then. Lol

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By *quirtyMcSquirtyWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"I tell people if they can stay or not.

In my job before this one, I screwed people for money!

A lawyer then. Lol"

Nope.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

I explain the meaning of life and make things happen behind the scenes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I arrange for things in one country to go to a different country instead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get people off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I push a few buttons with the hope of telling my colleagues how shit they are at their job

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

My clients ignore me, really frosty they are, can't get a word from them.

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By *umalotagainMan
over a year ago

a town called malice

suck peoples toes and bend plastic to make them more comfortable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I drive a big floaty taxi so that stuff can be made & gets on the shelves of shops

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By *nmgCouple
over a year ago

Liverpool

I prevent Darwinism.

In my spare time, I promote Darwinism.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

I stab people, make them hurt, refer them to butchers and berate them to exercise and lose weight

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By *uvhandle20Man
over a year ago

SE London

I stare at computer screens and wiggle with the mouse. Something bad happened when I have to use the keyboard

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I prevent Darwinism.

In my spare time, I promote Darwinism."

You work in a condom factory?. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do stuff around peoples houses that they can't be arsed too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/10/20 10:08:55]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread is fantastic!

I get messy using tools and colors to make useless objects to decorate spaces.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am a gatekeeper and I say no a lot.

Her x

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By *torm in a G cupWoman
over a year ago

Land of the Long White Cloud

I listen, get ignored, fill out forms and give legal highs.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

I’m outstanding in my field.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m an alcohol alchemist

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I get people off. "

Yes. Yes you do

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By *rishman75Man
over a year ago

Chessington/epsom

I drive people around london in a tube underground taking them to work and home and sitting at red lights alot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I measure stuff and help people if things aren't working

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I measure stuff and help people if things aren't working"

Undertaker? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I make peoples outdoor spaces look nice

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I make peoples outdoor spaces look nice"

Beautician? Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I make peoples outdoor spaces look nice

Beautician? Lol"
you know what I do wing man dont give me away lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I talk to people, imbibe lots of tea & biscuits and give money away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find and take care of peoples hearts and everything else I can do to help keep them healthy .

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I make peoples outdoor spaces look nice

Beautician? Lol you know what I do wing man dont give me away lol

I know - I'm just trying to have a bit of fun.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

" I find and take care of peoples hearts and everything else I can do to help keep them healthy .

You definitely get my heart racing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tell people if they can stay or not.

In my job before this one, I screwed people for money!"
was your old job in the tax office or a traffic warden??

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

" I find and take care of peoples hearts and everything else I can do to help keep them healthy .

Cardiologist

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By *onkyLemonsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I lock myself in a small cabin, with nobody around me for company.

Then I haul a massive piece of metal around. Occasionally I stop and people get on/off.

Once at the end of my journey, I go back and do it all again!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My job is making loads of letters and symbols make images on a screen...

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By *ing-louisMan
over a year ago

Merthyr

I put pipes together and occasionally get wet

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I grow things and find new ways of killing them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m always outside in all weathers

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By *tevecabra7Man
over a year ago

cabra

Pole erector

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I’m always outside in all weathers "

Scarecrow?

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Pull the strings of others

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Pole erector"

You're a fluffer at the Polish embassy?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I lock myself in a small cabin, with nobody around me for company.

Then I haul a massive piece of metal around. Occasionally I stop and people get on/off.

Once at the end of my journey, I go back and do it all again!"
bus driver

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By *ilbearniMan
over a year ago

visiting

I move from room to room now to show groups how to express themselves through line and form

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I grow things and find new ways of killing them

"
a bio chemist?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I deal with people no one else wants to deal with. Sometimes, I even help them

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By *oney and ReggieCouple
over a year ago

braintree

I’m an erection specialist

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By *oDrama29Woman
over a year ago

sale

I suck all day long and help make things better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I organise people to see people and fix things they can't fix themselves using rather strange terminology #MRCS

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I find and take care of peoples hearts and everything else I can do to help keep them healthy .

"
are you a dietician? X

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

[Removed by poster at 21/10/20 10:40:58]

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I deal with people no one else wants to deal with. Sometimes, I even help them

You're a lady on Fab?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I suck all day long and help make things better"
I love you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Explain what you do for a living as obscurely as you can

E.g. I do maths to make colours and shapes move around on a screen"

I'm part of the great unwashed

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I suck all day long and help make things better"

You're the woman of my dreams.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I arrange words to make people buy toys.

–G

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m an erection specialist "
working even when your on fab you tropper lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I sit in a chair and make sure people don’t die in a giant bath"

Lifeguard?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I find and take care of peoples hearts and everything else I can do to help keep them healthy .

You definitely get my heart racing.

You Naughty Sir would have me checking your pulse again from tachycardia!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I make peoples outdoor spaces look nice"

And I bet those spaces look fabulous!!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

" I find and take care of peoples hearts and everything else I can do to help keep them healthy .

You definitely get my heart racing.

You Naughty Sir would have me checking your pulse again from tachycardia!!

If that's a euphemism for a blowjob then yes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I fix things people broke they didn’t realise they broke to stop them realising they broke something

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By *ony5Man
over a year ago

somewhere

Drawing and colouring in (this is what my sister tells people I do)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I sit in a chair and make sure people don’t die in a giant bath

Lifeguard? "

Got it in one!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Drawing and colouring in (this is what my sister tells people I do)"
a tattoo artist??

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By *onkyLemonsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"I lock myself in a small cabin, with nobody around me for company.

Then I haul a massive piece of metal around. Occasionally I stop and people get on/off.

Once at the end of my journey, I go back and do it all again!bus driver

Close but no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I herd snotty supper spreaders.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I lock myself in a small cabin, with nobody around me for company.

Then I haul a massive piece of metal around. Occasionally I stop and people get on/off.

Once at the end of my journey, I go back and do it all again!bus driver

Close but no"

Train driver?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I lock myself in a small cabin, with nobody around me for company.

Then I haul a massive piece of metal around. Occasionally I stop and people get on/off.

Once at the end of my journey, I go back and do it all again!bus driver

Close but no"
train driver???

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By *ohnny3333Man
over a year ago

fleetwood

I jingle jangle keys all day

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I tell men to take other men’s loads, I also take men’s loads after telling them what to do

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By *otrockWoman
over a year ago

Essex

I make sure people can get from a to b, don't blow them self's up or set fire to themselves..

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By *istretchMan
over a year ago

leeds

Make big cold boxes that other people drive around

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By *eorge JetsonMan
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

I look at boxes

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By *onkyLemonsCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"I lock myself in a small cabin, with nobody around me for company.

Then I haul a massive piece of metal around. Occasionally I stop and people get on/off.

Once at the end of my journey, I go back and do it all again!bus driver

Close but no train driver???"

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By *hekaiserMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

I read reports...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I stand or walk around a shop all day spying on people doing there shopping

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I get people off. "

I bet you are the Best at it !!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I read reports..."

You're a reporter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I arrange words to make people buy toys.

–G"

Reg toys or naughty toys?

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By *oldie_locks33Woman
over a year ago

Durham

I hold lots of long wet things in my hand, moving them back and forth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get paid for travelling round, looking at things and giving people mainly expensive news.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a visual technician

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By *reativecouplederbyCouple
over a year ago

Derby

We both just go on about stuff

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By *quirtyMcSquirtyWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"I tell people if they can stay or not.

In my job before this one, I screwed people for money! was your old job in the tax office or a traffic warden??

Nope. Getting a bit closer!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I stand or walk around a shop all day spying on people doing there shopping"

Security Guard?

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

I have a big chopper

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By *inkyRebelMan
over a year ago

Swindon

I make YouTube videos of damaged furniture

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I hold lots of long wet things in my hand, moving them back and forth

Any spare jobs going?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tell moron users to turn there computers on and off every now and again.

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By *riveroneMan
over a year ago

Hyde

I put things in places (occasionally where they are mwant to be)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I help to keep people sane whilst slowing losing my own sanity

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

I look at people’s bare bums, boobs, naked bodies, teeth and exposed internal organs or tissues through the glass and they don’t have to be alive or conscious when I’m doing it

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I look at people’s bare bums, boobs, naked bodies, teeth and exposed internal organs or tissues through the glass and they don’t have to be alive or conscious when I’m doing it

You're a professional pervert?

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By *urchoicenowCouple
over a year ago

Ashford

I make sure things happen that my clients want to happen, when the worst happens.

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By *evil-AngelWoman
over a year ago

...

I used to spend my days staring at a computer waiting for a phone call to tell me something had gone wrong and I needed to sort it.

Since Friday, I've done very little and I'm enjoying it

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

"I look at people’s bare bums, boobs, naked bodies, teeth and exposed internal organs or tissues through the glass and they don’t have to be alive or conscious when I’m doing it

You're a professional pervert?

yup

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

[Removed by poster at 21/10/20 11:30:21]

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I look at people’s bare bums, boobs, naked bodies, teeth and exposed internal organs or tissues through the glass and they don’t have to be alive or conscious when I’m doing it

You're a professional pervert?

yup

Good girl. Please send me an application form. Lol

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"I look at people’s bare bums, boobs, naked bodies, teeth and exposed internal organs or tissues through the glass and they don’t have to be alive or conscious when I’m doing it

Are you a murderer

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I have a big chopper

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"I have a big chopper

Knew it wouldn't be long

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I spend my life trying to make someone else’s life easier

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I care for people who do not remember me.

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By *oney and ReggieCouple
over a year ago

braintree

[Removed by poster at 21/10/20 11:45:10]

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By *oDrama29Woman
over a year ago

sale

"I suck all day long and help make things better I love you

Might be different if you knew where I worked...

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I spend my life trying to make someone else’s life easier

You're me?

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I have a big chopper

Knew it wouldn't be long

Well......

And I wouldn't say that exactly.....

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

"I look at people’s bare bums, boobs, naked bodies, teeth and exposed internal organs or tissues through the glass and they don’t have to be alive or conscious when I’m doing it

Are you a murderer

Nope and I have no intend to

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

Sitin a square box killing cats eyes on the motorway

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I make things move around the world to help businesses run

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By *ultry SuccubusTV/TS
over a year ago

London

I look into people's body

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By *oney and ReggieCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"I’m an erection specialist working even when your on fab you tropper lol

It’s a hard life

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By *nigmatic_AngelWoman
over a year ago

The place where fairies live

"I did a lot and now I don’t "

love this!!

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"I have a big chopper

Knew it wouldn't be long

Well......

And I wouldn't say that exactly.....

Oh ffs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I work all around the world but never leave my desk.....

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"I look at people’s bare bums, boobs, naked bodies, teeth and exposed internal organs or tissues through the glass and they don’t have to be alive or conscious when I’m doing it

Are you a murderer

Nope and I have no intend to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I suck all day long and help make things better I love you

Might be different if you knew where I worked... "
oh I dont know lol

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I work all around the world but never leave my desk....."

Me too

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By *ureEscapismMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I’m a time traveller that gets people high af without the need for any stimulants.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/10/20 12:29:27]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I drink coffee for a living.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i stab people with multiple needles dipped in ink.

i also sell my ass.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I make people happy

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By *awk90Man
over a year ago

Amsterdam

I probe tiny things with tinier things, to find out what's in the larger of the two

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I give advice only to often get abused and deal with copious amounts of opiates without getting arrested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I give advice only to often get abused and deal with copious amounts of opiates without getting arrested "
you post to mens inboxes and give them advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I make people happy "
yes you do

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

I like to help people smile

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By *eesideMan
over a year ago

margate sumwear by the sea

I handle lots of hard and squishy things....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I give advice only to often get abused and deal with copious amounts of opiates without getting arrested you post to mens inboxes and give them advice

"
lmao

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

I use fire and chemicals to transform Dinosaur remains into things that can burn or explode

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" I find and take care of peoples hearts and everything else I can do to help keep them healthy .

Cardiologist

Close... I work under the Dr.&they listen to us if they are smart !! And it's Fetal heartbeats I find ,then take care of their Mamas...I can also give you a shot in your ass if it's needed!! And give you mouth to mouth....

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By *uxley7777Man
over a year ago

wrexham

I make sure people can not steal you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I give advice only to often get abused and deal with copious amounts of opiates without getting arrested "

Pharmacist

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does anyone deal with any ‘Karen’s’ daily??

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By *7pete27Man
over a year ago

plymouth

I get filthy all day,Good with my hands, I make people happy and I’m knackered by the end of the day??

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By *essiejamesABCCouple
over a year ago

Salisbury

I sit down all day listening to people bitch and moan about everything including what they have to pay me for listening.

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By *ewsub4dommeMan
over a year ago

thirsk

I walk 10 to 15 miles a day to collect people's unwanted goods

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South

I make every other job possible ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I help people understand rules.

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By *icknHMan
over a year ago

Ilfracombe

I’m retard

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

I make people give me money. If they don’t I take their things

J x

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

"I make people give me money. If they don’t I take their things

J x"

Bailiff?

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

"I make people give me money. If they don’t I take their things

J x

Bailiff?"

Close - but I’m nice & try to help them

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I make people give me money. If they don’t I take their things

J x

Bailiff?

Close - but I’m nice & try to help them"

A nice baliff. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I give advice only to often get abused and deal with copious amounts of opiates without getting arrested

Pharmacist

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By *unmatt888Man
over a year ago

Duns

I stop people from getting wetter and more exhausted than they would otherwise be.

Also less dead.

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By *ambo1450Man
over a year ago

Newport

I fill holes with glass

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By *issVanillaWoman
over a year ago

I give people their hard earned pennies

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By *rownhotnessMan
over a year ago

Cheshire/London/Midlands

I give people energy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1s and 0s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I un-fuck fucked things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Explain what you do for a living as obscurely as you can

E.g. I do maths to make colours and shapes move around on a screen"
digs holes fill them in and play with dirt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/10/20 14:45:11]

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By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago

Gosport

Unfortunately I had to give uo setting light to things so now I spend my work days looking for very small amounts of things in the air.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I drink coffee for a living."

Me too !!

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

I’m still trying to find out and still marvelling that I haven’t been found out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I piss into a bottle . A shits out the question and I'm high as fuck

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

I put things back together that are broken, they break because they are either shite or the owner has no clue how to look after them. Usually the latter.

I always blame the machinery as they will still come back next time if I insult them

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