FabSwingers.com forum: Side Effects Of Getting Old......

By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

You hurt your back from sleeping

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Not being able to do all nighters. I need my sleep.

Mrs

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

You make ‘old people’ noises when you sit in / get up from the chair...

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

you just go with the flow...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The hair falling off your head and growing on parts of your body you don't want it to. (Mr). X

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

Knowing the government wants you dead to save on pensions, and to grab your house....

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

I find myself saying things like "You young uns are so fortunate, nowadays......"

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

"Knowing the government wants you dead to save on pensions, and to grab your house...."

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

"Not being able to do all nighters. I need my sleep.

Mrs"

Yup thats me

I love my bed !! Love my sleep !!

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Your knees creak when you walk upstairs!

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By *uriouscouple83Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

When you fall over and people act concerned instead of laughing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You put on a different pair of glasses to answer people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Refractory period measured in hours instead of minutes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't go anywhere without scoping out where the toilets are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your bollocks have become best friends with your knees.

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By *uck-RogersMan
over a year ago

Tarka trail

You find it easier to drags your balls along laminate flooring. Than an Axminster carpet.

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

I wouldn’t say is a bad thing. But I do enjoy the simple things in life

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By *parkle13Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

Big pants.

Are ur best pal .

Going down the stairs one at a time in the morning .

Decided if u should bend .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Big pants.

Are ur best pal .

Going down the stairs one at a time in the morning .

Decided if u should bend ."

Omg this! The stair thing is so me!

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By *parkle13Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

Iv just looked at the ages. Thought the 40s was the new 30s lmao

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By *parkle13Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Big pants.

Are ur best pal .

Going down the stairs one at a time in the morning .

Decided if u should bend .

Omg this! The stair thing is so me! "

Miss d .im glad its not just me ..x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Going to bed at a time i used to go out drinking lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So many random aches and pains that just appear from nowhere and disappear again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Iv just looked at the ages. Thought the 40s was the new 30s lmao

Depends what time of day it is, I'm at my most flexible between 8am and 10pm

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By *eachAndyMan
over a year ago

Studland

Thinking police officers are playing 'dress up' for a birthday party

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your palms get hairy.

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By *anda and CatCouple
over a year ago

I started hearing strange noises, sometimes voices. 1 day after my 40th birthday Every time I stood up or knelt down I heard someone groan.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Taking 3 days to recover from a drinking session which involved a lot less drink than you used to put away years ago. Not really knowing which part of you hurts the most. And kids saying "wow oh my god you're how old"??? Also remembering loved ones that passed away young but you thought it was ancient but now you're getting closer you realise it was very bloody young & realise how sad it is x

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By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

Go to the Doctors and get told well your at that age now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Starting to appreciate my parents tunes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Starting to appreciate my parents tunes

Wait until your kids start appreciating the music from your youth

that does make me feel old knowing my 27 year old loves Ultravox and Aha

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

"You can't go anywhere without scoping out where the toilets are"

This is me to a tee or pee

Can’t have the second coffee or else it’ll take double the time to get there, due to the toilet stops we’d have to make on the way

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By *rmainman10Man
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Making strange noise when you sit down or get up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You can't go anywhere without scoping out where the toilets are

This is me to a tee or pee

Can’t have the second coffee or else it’ll take double the time to get there, due to the toilet stops we’d have to make on the way

It's terrible isn't it

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

"You can't go anywhere without scoping out where the toilets are

This is me to a tee or pee

Can’t have the second coffee or else it’ll take double the time to get there, due to the toilet stops we’d have to make on the way

It's terrible isn't it

Even worse when it’s cold, the liquid just goes straight to the bladder

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Scrolling down forever to find your year of birth on an online form.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Looking at how low down something is before you sit on it and silently wondering if you could stand up in a smooth movement or if you might need arm rest assistance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thinking police officers are playing 'dress up' for a birthday party

They all look about 12

Every TV programme / film I watch now I'm older than the characters- other than Cocoon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the last 2 years I've noticed I need more sleep, I'm going blind quite quickly, gym recovery is taking longer

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

"Thinking police officers are playing 'dress up' for a birthday party

They all look about 12

Every TV programme / film I watch now I'm older than the characters- other than Cocoon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Starting to appreciate my parents tunes

Wait until your kids start appreciating the music from your youth

that does make me feel old knowing my 27 year old loves Ultravox and Aha

They already do

....

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By *rAitchMan
over a year ago

Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe

I bought some beige Chino shorts in the summer.

But at least I didn't wear sandals & white socks with them.

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By *parkle13Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

Comfy sensible shoes we would have laughed at 10 years ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting my kids to record tv programmes .... I remember my dad asking me to set the video recorder

Unable to read small labels unless I move it further away

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

"Taking 3 days to recover from a drinking session which involved a lot less drink than you used to put away years ago. Not really knowing which part of you hurts the most. And kids saying "wow oh my god you're how old"??? Also remembering loved ones that passed away young but you thought it was ancient but now you're getting closer you realise it was very bloody young & realise how sad it is x"

Mine 2 cans of beers limit on a fri or sat night otherwise my hangover is a killer after two . ...still on two cans indoors i ferl crap next day !

If i go out once in blue moon i have to get to a kenab dhop hungry or not or nxt day for three days are a complete write off !!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Going to Tesco and coming back with all manner of shit apart from what I actually went for in the first place. I'll write a list next time, I think to maself. Then forget to take the list with me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Forgetting what I'm talking about .. mid sentence

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By *ull2getherMan
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

"You can't go anywhere without scoping out where the toilets are"

Or you have to make sure that, before you leave the house, you have a "LMW" - Last Minute Wee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You agree totally with

Victor Meldrew

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

Turning down a late meet coz either to tired or not sure if it will stay hard long enough as not feeling in the mood

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

You use a wheelchair

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

You regret not paying more attention to the closing date for the Stannah Chair Lift sale offer.

You get a quote for life insurance only for the free pen.

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

Think your still young n attractive and a 20 something calls you fcking old baldie

....that pulls at my strings deffo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The fact that I'm usually sat at my desk in work by the time I can actually see out of my eyes.

Was that bump a cyclist?

Dunno.

Too early.

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By *ilvery brownMan
over a year ago

lewisham

am I too old to join this thread??

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By *nimaginativeUsernameMan
over a year ago

Rochester, Kent

Moaning at kids for ringing the doorbell and running off.

(Yes I actually did that this weekend

)

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

When i can be botheed to go out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Laughing at dad jokes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My body aches all over today because I had 3 gin and tonics

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

"Knowing the government wants you dead to save on pensions, and to grab your house...."

I am winning on both counts at the moment having had 15 years of state pension so far and am still going strong, and to avoid the house grab sold it to my son in law 10 years ago on the condition that I stay there paying a peppercon rent until I die.

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

You turn Radio One off because the music hurts your ears.

Kids call the 1990s “The olden day’s”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You turn Radio One off because the music hurts your ears.

Kids call the 1990s “The olden day’s”"

Radio One really does hurt my ears

I'm ancient

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"Forgetting what I'm talking about .. mid sentence"

I do that all the time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The sexy young things you lust after are even further out of reach

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

You need to write list otherwise you forget everything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your can't wait to get a walk in bath.

The golden girls becomes your go to porn...and it's nothing to do with getting pee'ed on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All chart music is described as " what the Hell is this bloody racket???"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You turn the car radio down so your can see better..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and...

" What the fark did I come in here for??"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone at the garden centre cafe knows your name.

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By *tephanjMan
over a year ago

Kettering

Not getting any meets mostly due to your own I'll health or can't find your zimmer frame

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A trip to the Keswick pencil museum seems like a real blast.

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

When you find someone on Fab who you would like to make contact with, only to find out you are way outside their age parameters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You start buying your clothes from adverts in the back of newspapers or buy shoes because they are comfortable.

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By *ave2489Man
over a year ago

Bury

When the bar is closing and younger friends are all talking about where to get booze for the after party....

You guys have fun, I'm going to go have a green tea and pass out watching reruns of old tv shows

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By *ervent_fervourMan
over a year ago

Halifax

Having to stretch off before dancing.

And if you can manage it subtly, before sex..

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By *rPeachyMan
over a year ago

Bristol

When you only know the clubs in town by what they used to be called

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By *uvhandle20Man
over a year ago

SE London

No sex, no rock-n-roll, and the drugs are on prescription

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Jesus christ! I must b oldest on this thread ! Even I dont feel that crotchedy! Lol x

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

I'm even more cranky when I'm overtired

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By *lipy123TV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

You notice a bruise and you think were did that come from

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By *lue yesMan
over a year ago

Aberdeen

So true

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By *lue yesMan
over a year ago

Aberdeen

If you can up them at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You wake up and immediately need a nap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You hurt your back from sleeping"

It wasn’t like that in my day

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By *lydeCMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

Getting angry at stuff younger folk do and having to be reminded that I did exactly the same sort of stuff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I too love my bed but prefer a woman in it !

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Not being able to do all nighters. I need my sleep.

Mrs"

That's OK. I'll pull your nightie down when I'm finished.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I laugh at you, with your oldness, and your aches and pains! Hahahah...oooh my sciatica!!

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By *moothshaftMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Erections with a mind of their own!

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

"The sexy young things you lust after are even further out of reach

SPOT ON !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My knees and ankles sound like a Phil Collins drum solo when going up or down stairs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have less years left to live than you have already lived

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By *nigmatic_AngelWoman
over a year ago

The place where fairies live

You realise you shouldn't have worried about what people thought about you when you were young. And not been a people pleaser for most of her life..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Noticing 'noise' a lot more.. needing peace and quiet haha!!

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

You high five after a good sex session because...

“You’ve still got it!”

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

"Noticing 'noise' a lot more.. needing peace and quiet haha!! "

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

That not giving a s**t what others think of you comes with maturing years.

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By *iseekingbiCouple
over a year ago

N ireland and West Midlands

You are watching a porn movie and think "Fuck, that bed looks comfy"

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By *ollycouple71Couple
over a year ago

manchester

[Removed by poster at 19/10/20 23:51:16]

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

You go to sleep and wake up in the morning with one side of your face looking like an accordion.

It takes until about midday before your face springs back to it’s natural shape.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Going the the shops in your slipper because .... well because they are comfortable

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By *omin8rMan
over a year ago

In A Playspace

Is there a case of mistaken identity?

I have no clue what you are talking about wheel chair and all sorts

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By *hatYorkLadMan
over a year ago

York

When you see a photo of yourself from your mid 20's and realise how much your face is ageing despite usually feeling like you haven't changed much!

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

"Going the the shops in your slipper because .... well because they are comfortable "

And pyjama Bottoms because....well because they’re comfy.

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By *radleyandRavenCouple
over a year ago

Herts

Dropping something and deciding that that's just where it lives now, rather than bending to pick it up.

- Amy. x

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

Saga FM suddenly sounds like it may be of interest closely followed by Smooth.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

When it takes you all night to do what you used to do all night

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"you just go with the flow..."

I've always done this, as long as it flows my way

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"When it takes you all night to do what you used to do all night"

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

You rest for a few weeks because you think that you may be able to make it fully through a wank if you do. That's if you even remember to try one.

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

Is it harder to get hard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It takes me all night to do what I used to do all night

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By *pl83mfCouple
over a year ago

Montreal

You can tell a change in weather by joint pain

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can’t remember.

What was the question again?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know your getting old when you order a boiled egg in a restaurant.....

and they want the money upfront

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

I now pay for most tradesmen so job is done properly rather than d.i.y it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get a grip you're all just pups still lolol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pulling an all nighter now means you don’t get up in the middle of the night to pee.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You hurt your back from sleeping"

New mattress needed, nothing to do with age

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your coffee intake doubles

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah but you're not old

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every time I get up from the sofa I say to myself ' why am I so old '

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By *ayMyName2018Man
over a year ago

Where the Wild Things Are

My bones play a funky breakbeat when I get out of bed in the morning.

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

I have to sit to put my socks on or I’d fall over

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"My bones play a funky breakbeat when I get out of bed in the morning."

I know that one oh so well too sadly.

Mr M

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By *unmatt888Man
over a year ago

Duns

You can remember when this was all fields.

(Seriously, there's an industrial unit near me and I really can remember when it was a field)

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By *ayMyName2018Man
over a year ago

Where the Wild Things Are

"My bones play a funky breakbeat when I get out of bed in the morning.

I know that one oh so well too sadly.

Mr M

And don’t get me started on The Grunt.

It’s just sneaks up on you at first, you don’t realise it’s happening.... then, it happens. You realise every time you get up, sit down, bend, over, straighten up..... there it is - “ooooof”.... it just creeps out. The Grunt.

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By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

None here. Just gets better and better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Afternoon ‘power’ naps

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"None here. Just gets better and better. "

That's a side effect.... it's a good one though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Afternoon ‘power’ naps

Love a power nap

Even better with my granddogs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The recovery rate .

Takes longer to recover from a beer , sex and any physical activity ??

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By *ooljoeMan
over a year ago

Harrogate

Taking life easy, less angry with people's stupidness and ensuring healthy living.

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

I have a broken vertebrae in two places, my back causes a lot of problems..

But the cancer and stroke have taken its toll on me...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to hear that , thoughts and wishes with you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will get back to you when I get old

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By *tephanjMan
over a year ago

Kettering

Going to bed early as you can't keep your eyes open and alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting up early because life is now too short and I don't want to miss any of it

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By *addyBabygirl2020Couple
over a year ago

norwich

So many good ones. This post has made me chuckle.

Someone mentioned making old people noise when you get up, this is so me!

My one to ass is getting to an age when I'm genuinely considering getting a vasectomy

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By *ral Extraordinaire OP Man
over a year ago

Kent

"The recovery rate .

Takes longer to recover from a beer , sex and any physical activity ??"

I had a whole days hangover today after 3pints of guinness last night and chinese take away .

Its unvelievable how much drink affects you as you get older

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By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton

I find myself dozing off in the afternoons when I’m at home.I am ok at work but I’m thinking of going from a 5 day week to a 3 day week

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So many good ones. This post has made me chuckle.

Someone mentioned making old people noise when you get up, this is so me!

My one to ass is getting to an age when I'm genuinely considering getting a vasectomy"

I had mine 18 years ago . No regrets. Go for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wondering when you wake that the crusty stain on your pjs was from a horny wet dream or a little bit of piss!

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

Nipple hair... Thats new

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

You wee when you laugh..not me yet but. I'm not far off

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Nipple hair... Thats new"

Swap nipple hair for chin hair

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"Nipple hair... Thats new

Swap nipple hair for chin hair

The fuckers are so long and coarse too

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"You wee when you laugh..not me yet but. I'm not far off

Damb. And I'm always trying to make you laugh.

I better not do that again.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Nipple hair... Thats new

Swap nipple hair for chin hair

The fuckers are so long and coarse too

I kmow right! Feels good to pull the little fuckers though

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"You wee when you laugh..not me yet but. I'm not far off

Damb. And I'm always trying to make you laugh.

I better not do that again.

Of anyone asks Chunks we will go with I squirted

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"You wee when you laugh..not me yet but. I'm not far off

Damb. And I'm always trying to make you laugh.

I better not do that again.

Of anyone asks Chunks we will go with I squirted

Woohoo.

I knew i liked you. X

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

Quite often younger (20's) are attracted to older so It's not all bad Getting old

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