FabSwingers.com forum: Flowers on a first Meet

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I normally try to walk with flowers on a first meet.

So women if a guy brings you flowers on a first meet, what would be your opinion of him (and yes I welcome all opinions even if you think the guy might be trying to overcompensate in other areas if you know what I mean)

Just want a broad spectrum of answers, much thanks.

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only

One guy I met for lunch (met once prior in the club) met me with a dozen roses

although a nice thought it really kinda put me off him. Far too much for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd find it rather strange and a wee bit out dated

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'd like it. It's rare I get flowers.

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

No necessary and would make me feel uncomfortable.

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By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London

Buying flowers on a first date has never worked in my favour.

Too cliché and unthoughtful.

I prefer being random

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By *latinumkittenWoman
over a year ago

from Home Counties to Middle Earth

On a date, yes

Meeting a regular FB, maybe

First Fab meet? that feels wierd

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d say sweet for the thought x

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

On Fab I'd find it incredibly weird

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I don’t like cut flowers.

A bar of galaxy would do me. Or a bottle of Lambrini.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a fucking Fab meet, I’m done

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By *rednwilma1Couple
over a year ago

york

"I don’t like cut flowers.

A bar of galaxy would do me. Or a bottle of Lambrini. "

My type of gal !!!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id be a bit worried about them. Would you bring a vase of water incase of droop.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for the honest answers, I'm a bit of an old school romantic at times so I love flowers on a first date and I guess I just extended it to fab meets as well. I've never got a complaint, most women are just a bit shocked tbh. But again maybe it's a difference in culture. I used to do the same back home (in the Caribbean where I'm from) and even when I knew the person was coming over to have sex.

For me personally I'd love to walk with a bottle of Prosecco, 2 glasses and some flowers, we chat and then let things flow from there (yes I know I'm weird lol)

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

On a first meet? I'd find that really strange.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Thanks for the honest answers, I'm a bit of an old school romantic at times so I love flowers on a first date and I guess I just extended it to fab meets as well. I've never got a complaint, most women are just a bit shocked tbh. But again maybe it's a difference in culture. I used to do the same back home (in the Caribbean where I'm from) and even when I knew the person was coming over to have sex.

For me personally I'd love to walk with a bottle of Prosecco, 2 glasses and some flowers, we chat and then let things flow from there (yes I know I'm weird lol)"

To me flowers or gifts in general are a romantic gesture. That's not what I'm doing on Fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d be embarrassed and wouldn’t like it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No I'd feel a right numpty giving flowers to someone I'd never met before

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

2nd meet, yes. Bring it on. And chocolates

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"I don’t like cut flowers.

A bar of galaxy would do me. Or a bottle of Lambrini. "

Would the bar of Galaxy be for sharing? Or does that depend on how well the bloke does on the meet?

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Lovely gesture x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never been given flowers on a first meet and in all honesty I do not expect gifts, therefore I think it may make me feel a little concerned that the person is treating it as more than what it is. Eventhough that may not be his intention.

I am however all for someone bringing snacks and drinks to keep our energy levels up, and I have done this too.

Her x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wish someone would bring me gifts even if it is one flower x

Nobody has ever brought me flowers X

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

"I don’t like cut flowers.

A bar of galaxy would do me. Or a bottle of Lambrini.

Would the bar of Galaxy be for sharing? Or does that depend on how well the bloke does on the meet?

Depends on how big the bar was

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"I don’t like cut flowers.

A bar of galaxy would do me. Or a bottle of Lambrini.

Would the bar of Galaxy be for sharing? Or does that depend on how well the bloke does on the meet?

Depends on how big the bar was

I’ll make sure it’s one that needs two people to lift

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From someone i know well, wonderful

Although i usually get apology flowers

From a Fab meet? A bit creepy

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Does flower shaped chocolate count?

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

"I don’t like cut flowers.

A bar of galaxy would do me. Or a bottle of Lambrini.

Would the bar of Galaxy be for sharing? Or does that depend on how well the bloke does on the meet?

Depends on how big the bar was

I’ll make sure it’s one that needs two people to lift

Now if you could just do that with the bottle of Lambrini as well....

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"From someone i know well, wonderful

Although i usually get apology flowers

From a Fab meet? A bit creepy"

Sex food is nice though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had this happen. It was really weird and I never met him again.

I don't fuck for gifts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"From someone i know well, wonderful

Although i usually get apology flowers

From a Fab meet? A bit creepy

Sex food is nice though

Post coitus snacks are always going to be known as sex food now

I like that

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

I wouldn't do it on a first date never mind a first meet. Each to their own though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

makes you look like some deranged stalker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d like a new car.

Now that’s a gift

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

J gave me roses on our first meet.

I thought it was lovely! I accidentally left them in his car when he took me home

so next time I saw him, he brought more

First time for a fab meet but who doesn't love flowers?

I haven't had any since then I don't think tho...its only been 5 years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d like a new car.

Now that’s a gift

christ thats upping it just a bit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me personally I'd love to walk with a bottle of Prosecco, 2 glasses and some flowers, we chat and then let things flow from there (yes I know I'm weird lol)"

If a man bought me Prosecco, I would know that I'd made a terrible mistake

Cos he wouldnt be my type at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's sweet and would like it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I read that someone turned up for a first time meeting in a coffee shop with a bin bag full of sex toys

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By *erms and conditionsCouple
over a year ago

Alton

Wine... Wine is less intense

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too much for me...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d like a new car.

Now that’s a gift

christ thats upping it just a bit

Trust me; I’m worth it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I read that someone turned up for a first time meeting in a coffee shop with a bin bag full of sex toys "

That would make me laugh

Then I'd run

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I’d like a new car.

Now that’s a gift

Matchbox or airfix?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d like a new car.

Now that’s a gift

Matchbox or airfix? "

Ah. Liking the lateral thinking

#cheapskate

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"On Fab I'd find it incredibly weird"

Weird and creepy creepy creepy.

Besides that, it shows me the mindset of the giver towards women and a complete lack of awareness of my preferences.

Flowers belong growing, not intensely farmed to then die in a vase on a table.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I’d like a new car.

Now that’s a gift

Matchbox or airfix?

Ah. Liking the lateral thinking

#cheapskate

At least would be new and not second hand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"On Fab I'd find it incredibly weird

Weird and creepy creepy creepy.

Besides that, it shows me the mindset of the giver towards women and a complete lack of awareness of my preferences.

Flowers belong growing, not intensely farmed to then die in a vase on a table."

So that’s a maybe then.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would find it a bit weird, honestly. I associate flowers with romantic gestures and that's not what I am looking for on Fab. I'd worry that he was expecting it to be something more than a NSA hookup.

A bottle of wine would also be awkward as I don't drink alcohol...

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

"On a fucking Fab meet, I’m done

Could you bring me a pasty instead please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d like a new car.

Now that’s a gift

Matchbox or airfix?

Ah. Liking the lateral thinking

#cheapskate

At least would be new and not second hand.

I don’t mind second hand.... a nice s line BMW Z4 perhaps

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

I was given a book on a meet. We had previously messaged a fair bit, so kinda knew each other for the book being given not to be creepy.

But..I was once given a thank you card and a flower on the way for a social/meet and that was a bit much I thought!

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By *ransistersTV/TS
over a year ago

Dover

Yes love fresh flowers, shows they are thoughtful.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

I would be pleased that he made the effort. It's a very nice gesture.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I was given a book on a meet. We had previously messaged a fair bit, so kinda knew each other for the book being given not to be creepy.

But..I was once given a thank you card and a flower on the way for a social/meet and that was a bit much I thought!"

What about a kebab?

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

For me personally I'd love to walk with a bottle of Prosecco, 2 glasses and some flowers, we chat and then let things flow from there (yes I know I'm weird lol)"

You've had a good reception when offering because nobody would be horrible about it.

Women also spend their lives checking their reactions, behaviours and dialogue on a subconscious and intuitive level to protect themselves from retaliation.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Enjoying the wide range of responses thus far, much thanks again for all who have contributed to this discussion.

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By *irginieWoman
over a year ago

Near Marlborough

I’d be conflicted. I don’t like cut flowers generally (for lots of reasons). But it would be with the best intentions. I’d accept through gritted teeth but wouldn’t appreciate the assumption that just because we are women we like flowers.

I’d rather someone ask me if they can bring anything with them, I’d generally say no, but maybe wine if they were coming round for a drink.

V x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

For me personally I'd love to walk with a bottle of Prosecco, 2 glasses and some flowers, we chat and then let things flow from there (yes I know I'm weird lol)

You've had a good reception when offering because nobody would be horrible about it.

Women also spend their lives checking their reactions, behaviours and dialogue on a subconscious and intuitive level to protect themselves from retaliation."

Isn't that the truth

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"Enjoying the wide range of responses thus far, much thanks again for all who have contributed to this discussion."

Have you actually learned anything though?

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

For me personally I'd love to walk with a bottle of Prosecco, 2 glasses and some flowers, we chat and then let things flow from there (yes I know I'm weird lol)

You've had a good reception when offering because nobody would be horrible about it.

Women also spend their lives checking their reactions, behaviours and dialogue on a subconscious and intuitive level to protect themselves from retaliation.

Isn't that the truth"

But you demonstrate here and in most of your other posts that you don't understand that.

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By *osineCouple
over a year ago

Weston-Super-Mare

"I wish someone would bring me gifts even if it is one flower x

Nobody has ever brought me flowers X"

Awww, that just makes me want to buy you a gift.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I remember some woman on here said a bloke gave her a framed photo of himself on their first meet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was given a book on a meet. We had previously messaged a fair bit, so kinda knew each other for the book being given not to be creepy.

But..I was once given a thank you card and a flower on the way for a social/meet and that was a bit much I thought!"

I don't find your book example weird at all. Sounds like the start of a friendship after virtual chatting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I’d find it very sweet. It’s a nice gesture and thoughtful. X

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"I was given a book on a meet. We had previously messaged a fair bit, so kinda knew each other for the book being given not to be creepy.

But..I was once given a thank you card and a flower on the way for a social/meet and that was a bit much I thought!

I don't find your book example weird at all. Sounds like the start of a friendship after virtual chatting.

I was really touched by the book, it was a lovely gesture and pretty classy of him

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"I was given a book on a meet. We had previously messaged a fair bit, so kinda knew each other for the book being given not to be creepy.

But..I was once given a thank you card and a flower on the way for a social/meet and that was a bit much I thought!

What about a kebab?

I don't like kebabs but I'll have curry sauce and chips

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmm. Thinking I should have just accepted the affix kit or flowers

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By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

Not on a fab meet

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

For me personally I'd love to walk with a bottle of Prosecco, 2 glasses and some flowers, we chat and then let things flow from there (yes I know I'm weird lol)

You've had a good reception when offering because nobody would be horrible about it.

Women also spend their lives checking their reactions, behaviours and dialogue on a subconscious and intuitive level to protect themselves from retaliation."

Heck yes.

I'd pretend to be grateful, because I have to, and find it incredibly weird.

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By *amie HantsWoman
over a year ago

Atlantis

I like it

everyone is different though. I don’t think it’s creepy or weird.

Standing outside my window having wank would be weird and creepy

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

"I like it

everyone is different though. I don’t think it’s creepy or weird.

Standing outside my window having wank would be weird and creepy "

That made me lol ! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love it, such a sweet thought.

I've had 3 guys bring me flowers, and I've also turned up for meets with little gifts.

Its nice to be nice.

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By *irewolffMan
over a year ago

Dublin

Not for a fab meet...no.

Maybe on a normal date but tbh, I wouldnt feel very comfortable getting flowers on any 1st date.

MsD

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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

I think it be nice i dont get flowers so I like it

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

I only buy and receive gifts for/from my fwb

Dinner/breakfast doesn't count as a gift on a weekend away

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like it

everyone is different though. I don’t think it’s creepy or weird.

Standing outside my window having wank would be weird and creepy "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like it

everyone is different though. I don’t think it’s creepy or weird.

Standing outside my window having wank would be weird and creepy "

During the first lockdown, a guy actually said he'd like to do that

Pull up outside my house and wank while I watched him from the window

He was perfectly serious too

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"I love it, such a sweet thought.

I've had 3 guys bring me flowers, and I've also turned up for meets with little gifts.

Its nice to be nice. "

Let's hope he can see that all women are different and not just assume any stereotype he attributes to us is valid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love it, such a sweet thought.

I've had 3 guys bring me flowers, and I've also turned up for meets with little gifts.

Its nice to be nice.

Let's hope he can see that all women are different and not just assume any stereotype he attributes to us is valid

Even with all these different responses,I'm sure we will just be branched into the same bracket anyways.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

For a romantic date, I rather like the idea of flowers.

Unfortunately, as a hayfever sufferer my sneezing is likely to ruin the romance.

Would be a bit uncomfortable with flowers on a Fab meet.

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By *andyMinx_tvTV/TS
over a year ago

Leeds

I've had flowers on a second Fab meet and it didn't make me feel uncomfortable.

I've had wine (even though they were driving) and chocolates on a first Fab meet. Is it persuasive? Ultimately, it still comes down to your connection with the person you are meeting as to how inclined you feel to meet again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was given a very expensive bottle of perfume once on a first meet and although it was a lovely gesture, I didn't want it. I definitely would not want any flowers on any meet, even from a long standing lover. It's a bit awkward.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

On a Fab meet no. On a 'proper' date, it's a nice touch. But I would probably prefer a sexy pair of knickers.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think flowers in a first fab meet is a bit over kill. If was was receiving flowers from a man I’d prefer he was someone who knows me well enough to choose flowers that I like. That’s only my humble opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like it

everyone is different though. I don’t think it’s creepy or weird.

Standing outside my window having wank would be weird and creepy "

I said sorry!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

personally dont see anything wrong with it, its not like a marriage proposal

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was given a book on a meet. We had previously messaged a fair bit, so kinda knew each other for the book being given not to be creepy.

But..I was once given a thank you card and a flower on the way for a social/meet and that was a bit much I thought!

I don't find your book example weird at all. Sounds like the start of a friendship after virtual chatting.

I was really touched by the book, it was a lovely gesture and pretty classy of him

Back in my country I used to almost always gift a woman with a copy of Paulo Coelho The Alchemist,not as a first date gift though but while dating. One of the most influential books I've ever read.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like flowers. A small bunch would be nice but in no way at all necessary

You're gonna weird some women out, and make some smile. I hope you get the appreciative ones x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't like presents from people I don't really know... It can be hard enough to get me to accept a drink tbf

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

I’d find it extremely weird to be given any kind of gift on a first meet - it’s not a date after all. I don’t even let men buy me drinks on socials anymore, there are too many men who think you owe them if they spend any money on you at all. So if a guy turned up to a meet with flowers or chocolates I’d be properly weirded out and wonder what he was after. If he turned up with a bottle of alcohol I’d assume he was trying to get me d*unk and the meet would be over immediately.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to agree with the points made upthread - when I was younger, I had a couple of men turn nasty when buying me dinner didn't result in sex and ever since then, I've been wary.

For me, a first meet is a chance to have a chat and see if there's any chemistry there. What if he turns up with flowers (or any other gift) and I don't fancy him? Do I take the flowers and say nothing in case he gets aggressive? Do I refuse the flowers and say, "Sorry but I don't fancy you?" It's a bit of a minefield.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I see it as a romantic gesture, a fab meet isn’t romantic so I’d find it a bit odd.

Actually, the only guy that has turned up with flowers for me on a date, turned out to be a fucking weirdo so I’d probably run a mile.

Even if a fb brought them, I’d wonder why. I much prefer a brew afterwards

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By *rouble1998Woman
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

It would be a massive turn off for me. I really don’t like gift giving of any kind but that’s my personal preference. Also not sure how appropriate it would be in the context of a swinging meet?

In my eyes Fab isn’t really for dating

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By *hitehunter4bbcMan
over a year ago

Bristol

Flowers no ,coffee cake ,lub and a dildo maybe

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

"I wouldn't do it on a first date never mind a first meet. Each to their own though."

This

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have to agree with the points made upthread - when I was younger, I had a couple of men turn nasty when buying me dinner didn't result in sex and ever since then, I've been wary.

To me personally it's about being kind to someone as you don't know if they had a rough day and a flowers from a stranger might be the way of sunshine they needed. It's not about expecting anything in return tbh it's just trying to put a little more kindness and compassion in a world that sorely needs it.

I've had first dates that didn't lead to second dates and that was ok, it wasn't meant to be, you be a man and move on, don't harp on it, not everyone is going to like you and I think it takes maturity (not necessarily age) for people to understand that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s a nice thing to do if that is what you want to do...anyone that is given flowers on the first date should be happy

. It’s a lovely gesture

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like it

everyone is different though. I don’t think it’s creepy or weird.

Standing outside my window having wank would be weird and creepy "

Not if you don't catch me it isn't.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"I have to agree with the points made upthread - when I was younger, I had a couple of men turn nasty when buying me dinner didn't result in sex and ever since then, I've been wary.

But this isn't about you and your intentions, it's about how it's recieved.

Many women here have told you their negative feelings towards receiving flowers yet you continue to insist it's a lovely gesture.

You've had examples of awful situations women have been placed in receiving a token gift yet you still haven't acknowledged it but turned it yet again into you banging your own drum.

Please, stop talking and start listening.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda ."

Are we talking 'dates' as in those leading to a romantic thing?

Or Fab meets?

Im a little confused

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like it

everyone is different though. I don’t think it’s creepy or weird.

Standing outside my window having wank would be weird and creepy "

Oh but that might just be how he shows affection

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By *urora1912Woman
over a year ago

Norfolk East anglia

Flowers is a lovely gesture if it's a date.

But a meet from fab would be a bit strange to me personally

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By *ransistersTV/TS
over a year ago

Dover

Jeez what's wrong with you ladies, a lovely gesture and it's full of goodwill hopefully.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are fab meets actually bringing flowers ...as long as they’re printed on a bottle of wine then that’s fab

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

One of my best meets, overnight in hotel.

Red roses and bubbly, dinner, breakfast, lift home.

I did buy some drinks but he wouldnt let me contribute.

Was a nice guy too.

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By *odgerNbadgerCouple
over a year ago

Chepstow

Date, maybe if thats the way the chat was going but tbh I'd be a bit wary. Feels a bit like lovebombing. On a fab meet, nope.

That said if we're visiting a regular couple we might bring flowers or a bottle but that's more a gesture of friendship than anything else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would only accept flowers on fab meet if it was my birthday that day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would only accept flowers on fab meet if it was my birthday that day."

Fair do's.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda ."

You simply have no idea, despite the comments and explanations and even agreeing with my earlier point that women live their lives checking themselves in case of negative reactions.

Where to sit on a bus or even sit at all was a common theme when I was a teenager for fear of being groped, girls and women are fair game and you only have to read the vast majority of messages sent treating us as free, disposable sex toys to know that giving flowers on a meet will put some in a very awkward and difficult situation.

I don't want cut flowers because they have been grown only for profit. If nothing else, how do I tell you that when they are in my hands, without seeming like an an ungrateful cow? If I don't tell you, you may end up buying more that I don't want.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would only accept flowers on fab meet if it was my birthday that day.

Fair do's."

Otherwise it would be odd.

Chocolate on the other hand..

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By *odgerNbadgerCouple
over a year ago

Chepstow

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda .

You simply have no idea, despite the comments and explanations and even agreeing with my earlier point that women live their lives checking themselves in case of negative reactions.

PREACH IT SISTER!

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"Jeez what's wrong with you ladies, a lovely gesture and it's full of goodwill hopefully.

Many have explained why it's not a lovely gesture, please listen and stop negating the opinions.

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By *ittleRed18Woman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

"On a date, yes

Meeting a regular FB, maybe

First Fab meet? that feels wierd"

^^^^This^^^^

I feel it is also a romantic gesture. I would also maybe feel obliged to do more/extend the relationship even if it was just a social meet. Personally I think for some gift giving isn't charming and seen as being more of a manipulation technique. If you have a bond with someone, spending time together should be enough for them to want to be around you. Not gifts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Jeez what's wrong with you ladies, a lovely gesture and it's full of goodwill hopefully.

Except that most of the time it's NOT a gesture of goodwill - it's the man thinking, 'How can I increase the chances of getting this woman into bed?' And god forbid she accept the flowers and deny him sex because then she's a greedy money-grabbing cock tease.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Jeez what's wrong with you ladies, a lovely gesture and it's full of goodwill hopefully.

Well let’s face it the man may and can think that he may be getting something...but it’s always up to the women so just accept the flowers and then float away lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, hell no.. Flowers from hubby, yes.. Flowers fron a random Interneter? Too intimate. It's not what semi random fucks are about

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda ."

Wow. You’ve got an entire thread full of women telling you (not for the first time) that they disagree with you, and your response is to blame other men and make out you’re superior? We’re all saying it’s weird or even creepy, maybe take that on board and stop making the women you meet uncomfortable?

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

You simply have no idea, despite the comments and explanations and even agreeing with my earlier point that women live their lives checking themselves in case of negative reactions.

He was just paying lip service and trying to sound good. He’s shown repeatedly that he has no idea what life is like for women, and doesn’t really care.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would only accept flowers on fab meet if it was my birthday that day.

Fair do's.

Otherwise it would be odd.

Chocolate on the other hand..

I'd give you a Mars Bar.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda .

If he replies, I bet he will say (like he did earlier in this thread) that everyone he's given flowers to have been very happy about it. What he's ignoring is that behind that smile is possibly a woman feeling awkward, anxious and wondering what's expected of her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really don't like flowers at all .... I wouldn't be impressed, sorry

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda .

“Never had any complaints” - well no, because we never do complain, not when it could get us harmed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda ."

Yeah if there were no creepy men expecting something in return for flowers etc it might be perceived as a kind gesture.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You simply have no idea, despite the comments and explanations and even agreeing with my earlier point that women live their lives checking themselves in case of negative reactions.

He was just paying lip service and trying to sound good. He’s shown repeatedly that he has no idea what life is like for women, and doesn’t really care."

It amazes me at times how ppl specifically look for something negative out of a positive.

I specifically outlined my reasons for bringing flowers, so much so as to say that to me ( I can't speak for every guy) for me it is about bringing a little joy into the life of another person.

I even said maybe guys need to check themselves and how they treat women so that women wouldn't have to feel uncomfortable around guys.

Yet some how in all of that you derive I don't care about what women think and I'm not a good person (it's insinuated not spelt out)

Geez lol, you people are incredible at times (and I mean forum ppl and some not all) btw I don't think all agreed with you even though I do concur you have a consensus.

But like I said to someone who inboxed now earlier and told me that lots of women do like flowers and it's a very kind gesture etc. To thine own self be true. I'm naturally a romantic guy and I don't ever try to make women feel uncomfortable or ppl in general.

My personal MO is always to try in some way to enrich the life of anyone who has met me and to bring or add something good to their life (man or woman)

It's why I personally try and hold my self to high standards while interacting with other people

Wishing you a pleasant evening btw

Anyways you're entitled to your views

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I might also add that maybe British guys (and guys in general) have set the bar so low that women have come to take kindness and compassion as something to be suspicious of.

I think from the comments guys need to do a lot better and maybe then women will see these acts of kindness as what they are acts of kindness with no hidden agenda ."

Ah yes, classic tactic, blame other men’s behaviour to make yourself look like a beacon of light amongst the gloom.

I wouldn’t be comfortable giving a woman I’d never met some flowers, I’d like feel like a total plum, you don’t have to make big gestures to be kind, it’s the little things that gets noticed, giving a woman flowers seems contrived and like you’d expect something in return.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love flowers but would find it a bit odd on a first meet. Maybe if I was feeling down or it was a special occasion it would be nice from a fwb as I’m generally very giving myself but not from someone I’m just getting to know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like the fact you want to bring a bit of joy to someones day. It may work better as a totally random thing by plunging them into the hands of a stranger as you stride on by or leave them on the till for the person behind type of gesture. You feel good for surprising someone, someone gets a bunch of flowers and no one has to have any awkward chats or feel obliged to shag anyone.