FabSwingers.com forum: Happiness

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What is it to be happy? Something which today I believe is massively misleading. The idea that you ought to always be happy or there something wrong. Where as in Reality we all have pockets of highs and lows...this is normal.

What makes you happy?

Or what would make you happy?

What is it you’re striving for in life?

(Yep...working on stats and bored!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As sad as this may sound, nothing is making me happy right now.

I'm currently in a state of working to a routine to get things done and once they are, I just feel relief until the next thing needs doing.

Wonder if there's anything that can break me out of that...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I think it's about being fulfilled and having a sense of growth and purpose. Not a constant state of contentment, but being able to hang on to things to aim for.

I think happiness also requires a baseline of economic/corporeal security. Not having to worry about keeping a roof over your head or food in your belly.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Hard to pin down what happiness is as different things make different folk happy.

Personally, I’m happiest when I have money in the bank, food on my table and my children are happy.

I’d be happier still if I had my own place, but I gave that up for a very good reason so I make do with the situation I’m in.

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By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool

When I'm with someone who loves me.

I know happiness is supposed to come from inside and you cant rely on anyone else to make you happy,but the happiest times I've had in my life ,is when I've been with someone who loves me and vice versa.

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By *ogloomMan
over a year ago

Levens

OP maybe rather superficial but the unexpected quality found in your profile pictures it appears you also had excellent subject material.

Superb and brought a smile to my face. Hotlist plus one.

The prospect of lunch is now looming and I am excited for that.

Taking delight in the small everyday things

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"As sad as this may sound, nothing is making me happy right now.

I'm currently in a state of working to a routine to get things done and once they are, I just feel relief until the next thing needs doing.

Wonder if there's anything that can break me out of that..."

I think especially at the moment this is very much the same for many.

Find something however little that you enjoy...take that time out for you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it's about being fulfilled and having a sense of growth and purpose. Not a constant state of contentment, but being able to hang on to things to aim for.

I think happiness also requires a baseline of economic/corporeal security. Not having to worry about keeping a roof over your head or food in your belly."

It’s rather complex isn’t it? Made up of fractals from different areas of life that hopefully come together!

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

"What is it to be happy? Something which today I believe is massively misleading. The idea that you ought to always be happy or there something wrong. Where as in Reality we all have pockets of highs and lows...this is normal.

What makes you happy?

Or what would make you happy?

What is it you’re striving for in life?

(Yep...working on stats and bored!)

Working on your stats would make me very happy OP

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I think it's about being fulfilled and having a sense of growth and purpose. Not a constant state of contentment, but being able to hang on to things to aim for.

I think happiness also requires a baseline of economic/corporeal security. Not having to worry about keeping a roof over your head or food in your belly.

It’s rather complex isn’t it? Made up of fractals from different areas of life that hopefully come together!"

Oh god, so much.

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I get my happiness from making others happy. This i can do with my job and also ensuring my family and friends are happy. My life is very simple. I have no plans apart from working hard to pay off my mortgage, save for a few holidays and hopefully live long enough to lift my pension.

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By *ribsaMan
over a year ago

A box at end of your bed

Happypenis happypenis the greatest gift that I've been blessed so thank the lord that I've been blessed with my happypenis

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What makes you happy?

Or what would make you happy?

What is it you’re striving for in life?

(Yep...working on stats and bored!)

Working on your stats would make me very happy OP

Please you can have them

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I get my happiness from making others happy. This i can do with my job and also ensuring my family and friends are happy. My life is very simple. I have no plans apart from working hard to pay off my mortgage, save for a few holidays and hopefully live long enough to lift my pension.

Does making others make you happy though!!? Is happiness contentment?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All emotions are fleeting aren't they? Isn't that the point? A reaction to an event that causes you to feel something.

I guess emotions only become an issue when they overwhelm you. And some people are more susceptible to a certain type of emotion than others (happiness, sadness, anger etc).

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

Does making others make you happy though!!? Is happiness contentment?"

Yes it does. All my working life i have cared for others and it gives me great pleasure to know i have helped someone else. My dogs also make me happy but without them i would maybe be a bit lost.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"All emotions are fleeting aren't they? Isn't that the point? A reaction to an event that causes you to feel something.

I guess emotions only become an issue when they overwhelm you. And some people are more susceptible to a certain type of emotion than others (happiness, sadness, anger etc). "

Absolutely. It’s finding a balance and understanding this. Emotions also have a purpose...and can be misunderstood. We associate a feeling with an emotion in the same way we do an event.

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By *ogloomMan
over a year ago

Levens

Made me think now is happiness excitement or maybe excitement is happiness. But happiness can be more things, like contentment, security, trust.

Statistics can be ok. What are you using to analyze them or is it very manual? Maybe youd be happy to be able to get them done quicker?

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Just waking up in morning makes me happy! And seeing how lovely my children/grandchildren are makes me happy x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have just caught up with an friend. His story is tragic and wonderful. 6 years ago he had a stroke. He’s my age. He lost everything. Except his girlfriend. She’s nursed him through it. He now has a baby. Learned to draw, learned to do everything from scratch. He remembered me on Monday. He called me today.... that is fucking a happy feeling.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have just caught up with an friend. His story is tragic and wonderful. 6 years ago he had a stroke. He’s my age. He lost everything. Except his girlfriend. She’s nursed him through it. He now has a baby. Learned to draw, learned to do everything from scratch. He remembered me on Monday. He called me today.... that is fucking a happy feeling. "

yeah I get that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Made me think now is happiness excitement or maybe excitement is happiness. But happiness can be more things, like contentment, security, trust.

Statistics can be ok. What are you using to analyze them or is it very manual? Maybe youd be happy to be able to get them done quicker?"

Manual! It’s certainly not fun but nearing the end!! That’s happiness!

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

Stems from contentment to me

I spent too many years of being caught up in the, if I do this or do that I will be happy trap.

I took for me to hit rock bottom MH wise for me to appreciate the small stuff I'd been missing all along.

I feel happy and content with life in general right now as I know I have been at my lowest, every day now is a bonus and a blessing.

Jo x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Contentment. I'm pretty content. Not really striving for anything. Best time for me is quiet in my own space either walking dogs or reading a very good book.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"All emotions are fleeting aren't they? Isn't that the point? A reaction to an event that causes you to feel something.

I guess emotions only become an issue when they overwhelm you. And some people are more susceptible to a certain type of emotion than others (happiness, sadness, anger etc).

Absolutely. It’s finding a balance and understanding this. Emotions also have a purpose...and can be misunderstood. We associate a feeling with an emotion in the same way we do an event.

I wouldn't fully appreciate happiness if I hadn't been through some truly crushing lows

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I think in today's society, we're led to believe if only we had XYZ then we would be truly happy. Which is just nonsense. Happiness can only come from within.

Am I happy? It's not really I'm my nature to be overly happy, I'm far too cynical. But I do enjoy contentment, I have found peace with a lot of the tumultuous events that have occurred in my life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I'm with someone who loves me.

^ what this gent said. Couldn't have put it better!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think in today's society, we're led to believe if only we had XYZ then we would be truly happy. Which is just nonsense. Happiness can only come from within.

Am I happy? It's not really I'm my nature to be overly happy, I'm far too cynical. But I do enjoy contentment, I have found peace with a lot of the tumultuous events that have occurred in my life.

We are sold that happiness is a constant state which it isn’t.

This sounds like me. I’m not unhappy. But I’m content. Happiness just as other emotions comes and goes...though I’m more realist than optimist based on life experience!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"All emotions are fleeting aren't they? Isn't that the point? A reaction to an event that causes you to feel something.

I guess emotions only become an issue when they overwhelm you. And some people are more susceptible to a certain type of emotion than others (happiness, sadness, anger etc).

Absolutely. It’s finding a balance and understanding this. Emotions also have a purpose...and can be misunderstood. We associate a feeling with an emotion in the same way we do an event.

I wouldn't fully appreciate happiness if I hadn't been through some truly crushing lows"

I agree, having had a somewhat turbulent time of things makes you appreciate the calm, the quiet moments and find happiness and contentment where you can....often most unexpected.

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By *ebel Red HotWoman
over a year ago

York

Right now a full on Indian summer would make me very happy.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I doubt anyone is happy 24/7. I think you need the contrast to appreciate the happy times more and to not take them for granted.

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By *acDreamyMan
over a year ago

Wirral

I find I am happy in nature. Sailing toward a horizon or reaching the summit of a mountain. If I can do this with someone I love and my family then I am truly content. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Right now a full on Indian summer would make me very happy. "

There's happiness and then there's unrealistic expectations....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I doubt anyone is happy 24/7. I think you need the contrast to appreciate the happy times more and to not take them for granted.

Balance....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happiness or being happy, to me is a state that is constantly fleeting, just with any other emotional states. That being said, I am content with my life and situation, which is a great feeling, and helps to keep moving forward.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Im generally a happy person.

It takes a lot to knock me out of my own happy world, but a few people have managed it. (That's not an offer to try).

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

I'm a happy person not because I am happy all the time. But because I am fully aware of sadness and the sorrow it brings. I have been blinded by pain and mysery in the past, so much prefer to be happy natured. I don't want to be the reason you're sad. I do want to be the person to make you smile.

What makes me happy?

My kids and D.

Seeing others smile.

I'm easily pleased and get great pleasure from the little things in life.

Jo.Xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm a happy person not because I am happy all the time. But because I am fully aware of sadness and the sorrow it brings. I have been blinded by pain and mysery in the past, so much prefer to be happy natured. I don't want to be the reason you're sad. I do want to be the person to make you smile.

What makes me happy?

My kids and D.

Seeing others smile.

I'm easily pleased and get great pleasure from the little things in life.

Jo.Xx

We loose sight of the little simple things don’t we....I’m finding more and more it’s the who not the what!

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Seeing my boy laugh makes me happy

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Seeing my boy laugh makes me happy

yeah! Same with my girls unbridled kids laughter!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happiness is a lifestyle choice, it just takes the sacrifice of a lot of time and effort to get there

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

I'm generally in a happy state or just content and am rarely low, depressed or angry. After all, why should I? I'm blessed with health, a great career that makes a difference daily, am not hurting for money and have two beautiful, healthy children.

Knowing you're more fortunate than many helps to put things into proper perspective

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"All emotions are fleeting aren't they? Isn't that the point? A reaction to an event that causes you to feel something.

I guess emotions only become an issue when they overwhelm you. And some people are more susceptible to a certain type of emotion than others (happiness, sadness, anger etc).

Absolutely. It’s finding a balance and understanding this. Emotions also have a purpose...and can be misunderstood. We associate a feeling with an emotion in the same way we do an event.

I wouldn't fully appreciate happiness if I hadn't been through some truly crushing lows

I agree, having had a somewhat turbulent time of things makes you appreciate the calm, the quiet moments and find happiness and contentment where you can....often most unexpected.

Oh absolutely

I'm grateful every day. Knowing where I've been.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A new start in Cornwall.

A new job. Plus home

Being able to pass my first module at university.

Happiness

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm generally in a happy state or just content and am rarely low, depressed or angry. After all, why should I? I'm blessed with health, a great career that makes a difference daily, am not hurting for money and have two beautiful, healthy children.

Knowing you're more fortunate than many helps to put things into proper perspective

True. We know that we are all more fortunate than others though can be hard to keep in sight...also doesn’t help at times of hardship!

Again what you say very much comes back to the “who” in your life.

Being a naturally happy chap helps too

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A new start in Cornwall.

A new job. Plus home

Being able to pass my first module at university.

Happiness "

That’s great to hear! Well done on the uni module too!!

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Happiness is incredibly subjective and individual not only to each of us, but to specific moments or times too - no-one is truly 100% happy 100% of the time.

It's perhaps more a case of how you approach life, not necessarily "happiness" that is the key - I generally have a positive, glass half full outlook, and whilst it doesn't mean I am always happy, it does help me deal with the times when I am far from happy.

I count myself lucky that I'm able to adopt that stance as I know it's not something you can just *do* at will.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Happiness for me is contentment with what you currently have in life and making the most of it. It’s the simple things, family and friends healthy, my lad’s random daily questions, laughing and talking with friends.

This year hasn’t turned out how I had it planned, missed opportunities with so much planned free time. I didn’t expect on being out of work for the whole year but that is where I am at. It hasn’t got me down, I’ve just shrugged my shoulders and said to myself - something will come along and you’ll get around to doing all those things one day.

I wasn’t happy the last couple of years in my job and I knew it was toxic and lead to drinking every working day, I took control and volunteered for redundancy, cutting away two toxins in one big leap of faith.

Don’t let your happiness be controlled by something you can’t control.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have happiness.

You can see it through my pants.

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By *randmrsbigcCouple
over a year ago

North east

Knowing you're more fortunate than many helps to put things into proper perspective

Well said

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I'm a very positive and optimistic person, so it's unusual for me to be down or unhappy...I have a lot of people and things in my life that bring me pleasure, and I'm very appreciative of that

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have happiness.

You can see it through my pants."

well I can see how it leads to happiness

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Happiness for me is contentment with what you currently have in life and making the most of it. It’s the simple things, family and friends healthy, my lad’s random daily questions, laughing and talking with friends.

Don’t let your happiness be controlled by something you can’t control. "

This is something I come across in work...where people let uncontrollable events or happenings bring them down or excessively stress over rather than accept...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happiness is sharing a pb

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happiness is health, good friends, and all the little things in life.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Happiness is sharing a pb"

That’s Amazing! Tell me!!

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I don't think there's anything wrong with not always being happy, it's good and healthy to feel a range of emotions and to allow yourself to feel them without feeling guilty for doing so.

Happiness for me is feeling secure/loved in various areas of my life and being able to smile about the little things. Happiness doesn't always have to be a big emotion, it can be a little whisper of joy at something positive happening, a nice message from someone, a tipsy heart to heart or the feel of freshly laundered sheets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any emotion isn't felt all the time.

Especially if you're female

Like everyone else I have moments of happiness and even though I know it isn't real I buy into the ' I'll be happier when ' mentality.

In the present moment I feel happy and grateful for my home.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m happiest when spending quality time with my family. I’ve felt really happy this week. Yesterday was a super stressful day but I still feel happy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm happy if my family and close friends are all ok.

I'm happy if I'm healthy and feeling well this has a massive impact on all our lives.

My only goal in life is to remain healthy and financially secure until my time comes. Anything else good in my life is a huge bonus.

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By *av_55Man
over a year ago

"
what she said

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

Happiness is a cigar called Hamlet.

You only get it if you're a certain age.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't think there's anything wrong with not always being happy, it's good and healthy to feel a range of emotions and to allow yourself to feel them without feeling guilty for doing so.

Reoccurring theme...it’s the little things, unexpected and the who in our loves not the what.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Happiness is a cigar called Hamlet.

You only get it if you're a certain age."

I got it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Alienating my friends made me happy. Having nothing means I have nothing to lose. It's a free feeling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happy ness is staying off / away from social media

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Alienating my friends made me happy. Having nothing means I have nothing to lose. It's a free feeling. "

That’s quite interesting....something which I can also relate to. But does it not become lonely?

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"Alienating my friends made me happy. Having nothing means I have nothing to lose. It's a free feeling. "

Understand this, some can be quite draining, needy and toxic, I cut them out of my life and made a huge difference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Alienating my friends made me happy. Having nothing means I have nothing to lose. It's a free feeling.

That’s quite interesting....something which I can also relate to. But does it not become lonely?"

Weirdly no. As Spurschick says, they can be toxic and draining.

It was a lot like the 'feeling alone in a crowded room' thing. They weren't there for me when I needed them. It was shit but then I realised I'm stronger than I thought.

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

Very small things make me really happy. I wouldn’t be happier if you gave me a million pounds. Money would bring less worry but wouldn’t make me happier.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why do we feel that we need to be better, more fulfilled, worthwhile. We are just a dot on the planet. Let other people strive for eternal happiness and serenity.

I had a toffee latte from McDonald's this morning and it was lovely. I walked past beautiful coloured Autumn trees in my tatty joggers and Asda hoodie.

Some people looked at me like I'm a tramp. I laughed inside and stomped in the leaves like I'm a toddler. It was good.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What makes you happy?

Or what would make you happy?

What is it you’re striving for in life?

(Yep...working on stats and bored!)

Very intense topic OP.

Happiness... never ending , neither near nor far, always hanging around neither urs nor others, .. . Evolution has taught one thing. Survival of ur body needs a strong mind and mind needs motivation and inspiration and action. So we are always inside that circles of three. When one of them is reached and u continue for the next. To all this the only fuel is happiness always and for one purpose and one purpose only to have a happy ending to our soul

All be in peace

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Alienating my friends made me happy. Having nothing means I have nothing to lose. It's a free feeling.

That’s quite interesting....something which I can also relate to. But does it not become lonely?

Weirdly no. As Spurschick says, they can be toxic and draining.

It was a lot like the 'feeling alone in a crowded room' thing. They weren't there for me when I needed them. It was shit but then I realised I'm stronger than I thought.

I did this not so long back, removed pretty much everyone. It certainly makes lode easier and stops the second guessing...

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

"Why do we feel that we need to be better, more fulfilled, worthwhile. We are just a dot on the planet. Let other people strive for eternal happiness and serenity.

I had a toffee latte from McDonald's this morning and it was lovely. I walked past beautiful coloured Autumn trees in my tatty joggers and Asda hoodie.

Some people looked at me like I'm a tramp. I laughed inside and stomped in the leaves like I'm a toddler. It was good. "

You are my kind of lady lol!

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By *izandpaulCouple
over a year ago

merseyside

We're a happy couple, find pleasure in little and most things.

In our group of people we know there are happy, contented people, those who seem to find the good and enjoyable aspects of most things.

Those in the middle and those who moan and whine, love being the victim and would complain about the weight of their wallet if they won the lottery.

Our advice, give the latter a wide berth.

Mix with happy people, it's infectious.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lizndpaul

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What makes you happy?

Or what would make you happy?

What is it you’re striving for in life?

(Yep...working on stats and bored!)

Very intense topic OP.

All be in peace"

Happiness is not a requirement for survival...happiness is an emotion which Encourages us to strive for more of what gives us Thai feeling for each this is unique. However it’s the state of mind that we are frequently sold that we ought to be or there’s something wrong..where as reality is contentment or acceptance is a stable state and all else fleeting.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do we feel that we need to be better, more fulfilled, worthwhile. We are just a dot on the planet. Let other people strive for eternal happiness and serenity.

I had a toffee latte from McDonald's this morning and it was lovely. I walked past beautiful coloured Autumn trees in my tatty joggers and Asda hoodie.

Some people looked at me like I'm a tramp. I laughed inside and stomped in the leaves like I'm a toddler. It was good. "

Autumn leaves....the best!!

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