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"It’s all about the kudos on strava " I've got 2 KOM....I'm not aware how to get one here | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast " Covid made it obselete | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast " I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works. | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast " I'll take one please. I'm seriously fucking serious | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast " I need one of these... | |||
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"It’s all about the kudos on strava I've got 2 KOM....I'm not aware how to get one here " I’ve cleaned up the KOMs on here! | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast Covid made it obselete " Damn! Back to the drawing board.... | |||
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"Yeah I got medals and everything " One was for taking it balls deep | |||
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"Yeah I got medals and everything One was for taking it balls deep" Anyone would deserve one for taking yours balls deep! | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works." I’m strapping it on as I type.... Please assume the position of thy choosing madam..... | |||
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"Yeah I got medals and everything One was for taking it balls deep Anyone would deserve one for taking yours balls deep! " And an award for bravery | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast Covid made it obselete " I doubt it | |||
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"I'm here for the tripadvisor rating, please rate your stay out of 10. If I get a good score i get a plaque I can nail to my bottom!" The garden was a little unkempt but the cave diving experience was a blast and the staff are very courteous. 8/10 would visit again | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast I'll take one please. I'm seriously fucking serious " I’m thinking of patenting a ladies version but am struggling with where exactly to attach it. I did toy with the idea of hanging it like a Christmas tree Boerboel from the boobies but it was giving off false readings due to confusing undulations. Rest assured though - when I do perfect it, it will be awesome | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast I need one of these... " Another taker! These are selling like hot cakes! | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast I need one of these... Another taker! These are selling like hot cakes! " Will I get a demo? | |||
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"It’s all about the kudos on strava I've got 2 KOM....I'm not aware how to get one here I’ve cleaned up the KOMs on here! " All KOM are wind assisted | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works. I’m strapping it on as I type.... Please assume the position of thy choosing madam..... " I'll start on my back... been a fair while since I've been penetrated so may need easing in gently | |||
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"Nah im the bumbling hasbeen sitting in the corner eating comfort cake " Lemon drizzle?! | |||
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"Nah im the bumbling hasbeen sitting in the corner eating comfort cake " You can come to ours and bake us a cake | |||
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"Nah im the bumbling hasbeen sitting in the corner eating comfort cake You can come to ours and bake us a cake " firing up the bicycle.. should be there by the morning | |||
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"Nah im the bumbling hasbeen sitting in the corner eating comfort cake " What kind of cake? Are you sharing? | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast I need one of these... Another taker! These are selling like hot cakes! Will I get a demo? " Of course - a good salesman should ALWAYS demonstrate his wares... | |||
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"I have patented a miraculous device which when attached to the base of my nob, can keep track of exactly how many times my arse thrusts during a sex session plus my average speed of thrust, my calories burnt and my cardiovascular status during the act. I’ve tentatively termed it, the Fuck-Bit. Order it now to avoid disappointment- this baby is sure to sell out fast I'll take one but only if you demonstrate ON ME exactly how it works. I’m strapping it on as I type.... Please assume the position of thy choosing madam..... I'll start on my back... been a fair while since I've been penetrated so may need easing in gently " I’m very gentle.... | |||
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