FabSwingers.com forum: Paddy and Murphy fancy a pint but only have £1 between them

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Paddy goes off and buys a sausage. Murphy says “are you mad? Now we’re skint”

“Come on” says paddy, “follow me”

They go into a pub and drink them before they pay. Paddy shoved the sausage through the zipper on his jeans and tells Murphy to get down on his knees and suck it.

The barman goes Bessel and throws them out.

I0 pints and 10 pubs later Murphy says; “I can’t do this anymore, my knees are sore and I’m pissed.”

“How do you think I feel?” Says paddy.

“I can’t remember which pub I lost the sausage in?”

By *vilgasamWoman
over a year ago

The dot in the i

Spider spider on the wall,

Have you got no sense at all,

Can’t you see that wall is plastered,

Now you’re stuck

You silly _____

I wish I was a fairy queen

and if it came to pass,

I’d climb up all the rocks and trees

and slide down on my ____

I’ll let you fill in the blanks

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Spider spider on the wall,

Have you got no sense at all,

Can’t you see that wall is plastered,

Now you’re stuck

You silly _____

I wish I was a fairy queen

and if it came to pass,

I’d climb up all the rocks and trees

and slide down on my ____

I’ll let you fill in the blanks

I can fill your ass?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Little jack Horner sat in a corner eating his cold meat pie.

He caught salmonella, unfortunate fella

And now is likely to die.