FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Advice

Jump to newest
 

By *itom18 OP   Man
over a year ago

Wigan

I'm going to be a sub for a dominant guy, so looking for some good tips on how to make sure I please him

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Come on you guys, this man is looking for advice, don’t let him slip off page one into the ether, throw him a bone here!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just do as your asked I suppose

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aul1973HullMan
over a year ago

East Hull

The Sub holds all the power.

Watch the 50 shades trilogy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The Sub holds all the power.

Watch the 50 shades trilogy "
please do not do this

There are some great books screw the roses being one of them. Some great websites for resources but the best thing you can do is communicate and find out what you Both want to get out of it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The Sub holds all the power.

Watch the 50 shades trilogy "

The first half is correct

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely discuss limits so both are aware of what your boundaries are and have a safe word

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

When is this happening?

I assume you have never “subbed” before?

What does being submissive mean to you? What does it mean to the other party?

Do you mean being submissive or just being a bottom for a top? Do you understand the difference?

Submissive and Dominant are typically roles adopted in a dynamic.

A bottom is the submissive equivalent in a casual or one off play session, with top being the Dominant. However most people prefer to ise the Dom sub names for ease.

While people will claim the submissive holds all the power, or submission is a gift, in reality thats not the case.

A D/s dynamic is power exchange. Both sub or Dom can choose to end the relationship if they feel the other is not suitable for varying reasons.

My tips are as follows

Ask questions/communicate

What would he do if you safeworded during a session?

Do you have safewords and understand their use?

How does he deal with aftercare?

Do you both follow SSC/RACK i.e. is all play risk assessed?

Has he explained what he wants, a masochist, a slave, service submission or just a rough fuck doll?

Do you have any hard/soft limits? Is he aware of them?

Dont ever be restrained on a first meet - unless you have built up trust through social meets. While yo hope nothing will happen, sadly it does.

The same for blindfolds - dont be blindfolded and restrained on a first meet.

Do you have any medical issues he should be aware of that could impact your play; mobility, diabetes, blood pressure etc.

Depending on the answers to those there are follow up questions.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When is this happening?

I assume you have never “subbed” before?

What does being submissive mean to you? What does it mean to the other party?

Do you mean being submissive or just being a bottom for a top? Do you understand the difference?

Submissive and Dominant are typically roles adopted in a dynamic.

A bottom is the submissive equivalent in a casual or one off play session, with top being the Dominant. However most people prefer to ise the Dom sub names for ease.

While people will claim the submissive holds all the power, or submission is a gift, in reality thats not the case.

A D/s dynamic is power exchange. Both sub or Dom can choose to end the relationship if they feel the other is not suitable for varying reasons.

My tips are as follows

Ask questions/communicate

What would he do if you safeworded during a session?

Do you have safewords and understand their use?

How does he deal with aftercare?

Do you both follow SSC/RACK i.e. is all play risk assessed?

Has he explained what he wants, a masochist, a slave, service submission or just a rough fuck doll?

Do you have any hard/soft limits? Is he aware of them?

Dont ever be restrained on a first meet - unless you have built up trust through social meets. While yo hope nothing will happen, sadly it does.

The same for blindfolds - dont be blindfolded and restrained on a first meet.

Do you have any medical issues he should be aware of that could impact your play; mobility, diabetes, blood pressure etc.

Depending on the answers to those there are follow up questions.

"

Great advice

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend


"The Sub holds all the power.

Watch the 50 shades trilogy "

Crap advice. Do not listen to this.


"When is this happening?

I assume you have never “subbed” before?

What does being submissive mean to you? What does it mean to the other party?

Do you mean being submissive or just being a bottom for a top? Do you understand the difference?

Submissive and Dominant are typically roles adopted in a dynamic.

A bottom is the submissive equivalent in a casual or one off play session, with top being the Dominant. However most people prefer to ise the Dom sub names for ease.

While people will claim the submissive holds all the power, or submission is a gift, in reality thats not the case.

A D/s dynamic is power exchange. Both sub or Dom can choose to end the relationship if they feel the other is not suitable for varying reasons.

My tips are as follows

Ask questions/communicate

What would he do if you safeworded during a session?

Do you have safewords and understand their use?

How does he deal with aftercare?

Do you both follow SSC/RACK i.e. is all play risk assessed?

Has he explained what he wants, a masochist, a slave, service submission or just a rough fuck doll?

Do you have any hard/soft limits? Is he aware of them?

Dont ever be restrained on a first meet - unless you have built up trust through social meets. While yo hope nothing will happen, sadly it does.

The same for blindfolds - dont be blindfolded and restrained on a first meet.

Do you have any medical issues he should be aware of that could impact your play; mobility, diabetes, blood pressure etc.

Depending on the answers to those there are follow up questions."

Listen to this.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *itom18 OP   Man
over a year ago

Wigan

[Removed by poster at 05/09/20 20:27:10]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *itom18 OP   Man
over a year ago

Wigan


"When is this happening?

I assume you have never “subbed” before?

What does being submissive mean to you? What does it mean to the other party?

Do you mean being submissive or just being a bottom for a top? Do you understand the difference?

Submissive and Dominant are typically roles adopted in a dynamic.

A bottom is the submissive equivalent in a casual or one off play session, with top being the Dominant. However most people prefer to ise the Dom sub names for ease.

While people will claim the submissive holds all the power, or submission is a gift, in reality thats not the case.

A D/s dynamic is power exchange. Both sub or Dom can choose to end the relationship if they feel the other is not suitable for varying reasons.

My tips are as follows

Ask questions/communicate

What would he do if you safeworded during a session?

Do you have safewords and understand their use?

How does he deal with aftercare?

Do you both follow SSC/RACK i.e. is all play risk assessed?

Has he explained what he wants, a masochist, a slave, service submission or just a rough fuck doll?

Do you have any hard/soft limits? Is he aware of them?

Dont ever be restrained on a first meet - unless you have built up trust through social meets. While yo hope nothing will happen, sadly it does.

The same for blindfolds - dont be blindfolded and restrained on a first meet.

Do you have any medical issues he should be aware of that could impact your play; mobility, diabetes, blood pressure etc.

Depending on the answers to those there are follow up questions.

"

Wow thanks for your advice.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Think about what you want as much as possible. Open discussions with partners as early as possible and ensure that all understand and accept compatibility, otherwise cancel the meeting.

When the meeting starts, repeat the discussions process and only continue if 100% agreed.

Have a safety protocol including safe word.

Think on your feet at the time. Be fully under control and do your utmost to serve

It's fine to take rest breaks etc. Follow cleanliness and hygiene routines throughout. Respect the covid-19 restrictions.

If uncomfortable, get comfortable or take a break or stop completely.

If matched, your discussions will have covered all activities and approaches, so pursue them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"When is this happening?

I assume you have never “subbed” before?

What does being submissive mean to you? What does it mean to the other party?

Do you mean being submissive or just being a bottom for a top? Do you understand the difference?

Submissive and Dominant are typically roles adopted in a dynamic.

A bottom is the submissive equivalent in a casual or one off play session, with top being the Dominant. However most people prefer to ise the Dom sub names for ease.

While people will claim the submissive holds all the power, or submission is a gift, in reality thats not the case.

A D/s dynamic is power exchange. Both sub or Dom can choose to end the relationship if they feel the other is not suitable for varying reasons.

My tips are as follows

Ask questions/communicate

What would he do if you safeworded during a session?

Do you have safewords and understand their use?

How does he deal with aftercare?

Do you both follow SSC/RACK i.e. is all play risk assessed?

Has he explained what he wants, a masochist, a slave, service submission or just a rough fuck doll?

Do you have any hard/soft limits? Is he aware of them?

Dont ever be restrained on a first meet - unless you have built up trust through social meets. While yo hope nothing will happen, sadly it does.

The same for blindfolds - dont be blindfolded and restrained on a first meet.

Do you have any medical issues he should be aware of that could impact your play; mobility, diabetes, blood pressure etc.

Depending on the answers to those there are follow up questions.

"

Excellent advice

Her x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

[Removed by poster at 05/09/20 21:03:12]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Play safely with people you know well and trust , you both have responsibilities and safe words aren’t much use when you can’t speak so he needs to know your limits and signs of distress. The only way to do this is practice , including practising surprise / impact etc

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Feel free to send a PM if you want other generic advice, or post here so others can chime in.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top