FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Dilemma

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Posting as quickly as I can and I'll check back to gauge the consensus later

But would you ever recommend a real life friend join here? I'm with her now and I keep biting my tongue not introducing her to it, but I think it's prob exactly what she needs right now! Some casual encounters and a bit of light relief via forums/chatting etc. I know she wouldn't be interested in the couples side of things.

On the other hand, selfishly, do I really want real friends in my secret zone? Seeing each others pics or verifications etc, we're obviously surrounded by the same men locally and do I even want her knowing the rubbish I talk in the forum? Obviously we could block each other but we're probably both too nosey and then we run the risk even more of overlapping with people if we didn't confer !

So, do I or don't I refer a friend?

Ps she is gorgeous and hilarious in case that sways any opinions !

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Posting as quickly as I can and I'll check back to gauge the consensus later

But would you ever recommend a real life friend join here? I'm with her now and I keep biting my tongue not introducing her to it, but I think it's prob exactly what she needs right now! Some casual encounters and a bit of light relief via forums/chatting etc. I know she wouldn't be interested in the couples side of things.

On the other hand, selfishly, do I really want real friends in my secret zone? Seeing each others pics or verifications etc, we're obviously surrounded by the same men locally and do I even want her knowing the rubbish I talk in the forum? Obviously we could block each other but we're probably both too nosey and then we run the risk even more of overlapping with people if we didn't confer !

So, do I or don't I refer a friend?

Ps she is gorgeous and hilarious in case that sways any opinions ! "

I recommended my best friend and sister to come on here but I'm very open with them so nothing to hide x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

I also have a friend who would fit in here really well but like you, I don’t want to share my secret life with someone that close

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I'd say yes ...as long as you're both on the same wavelength with regards sex and how you want to find it ...could be great fun if you both enjoyed going to clubs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stay selfish and keep your secret zone secret. You don't wanna be responsible for the meltdown/vomit most ppl seem to experience shortly after joining the free sweet shop either....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Keep it to yourself, you'll regret it x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Blocking each other won't stop you reading forum contributions that you both make, only stops the messaging and profile viewing.

How much do you value your Fab "secret", how much do you trust her to stay schtum and how would you cope if she over shared with others?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Bliss

The sharing men part was the thing that made my real life friend leave, she couldn't handle the fact he was messaging both of us with sexual intentions.

Just be upfront with your friend is what I'd advise you, its not worth losing a real life friendship over sex

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

There is a very strong chance you'll overlap with men so it just depends how you feel about that,it's a tricky one I don't know.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a reason you're here, and I'm guessing it's a positive one! If you think she's of a similar mindset, then go for it!


"Ps she is gorgeous and hilarious in case that sways any opinions ! "

Then it's a double yes from me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

I did and they really enjoy it.

That decision was based not only on my trust in them to 'get it', but my trust in their understanding of me.

That changes person to person, so... couldn't answer for you.

I'm helpful.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

A true friend is someone who knows you inside out. I joined with my friend and it caused no issues. Was a bit embarrassing though when she brought her new boyfriend to a club with us as he just so happened to be my work colleague.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Ive told and suggested a friend from Ireland join

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Ooo this is exciting ..I wanna know if you do or not now

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town


"Keep it to yourself, you'll regret it x"

Yep. Admittedly a male and a male friend. My best friend was going through tough times and was also going through a very dry spell. I started talking about sites and clubs and had to spell it out for him. He was appalled and we fell out for a while. Thankfully friends again now but a line was crossed.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My friend and I have had a right giggle being on here. It's been comical receiving the same copy & pasted messages

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

No Lana .......... no.

This is your place where you can be the 'fab' you and not the you that you are with your friend.

No. And i don't want to hear any more about it.

No.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of my best friends now knows and is very supportive... but I’d feel really weird if she was on fab with me!

She’s like a little sister to me, and I feel very overly protective of her. Never mind the fact that she’d overshare with me about every meet and that would make me irritated x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I have real life friends on here. *waves if they read this* We often joke with each other about fab. Not yet had the issue of overlapping meets but I think we would be grown up enough to deal with it. I'd say it depends what your friendship is like.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Ive introduced a few people r to fab and the lifestyle with various levels of success

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a few good and close friends who are on here ans live near by . We go for a cuppa or a walk just as chums . We act as sounding boards for each other , also importantly we act as a safty back up if they or i goes on a meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

I’d add her and block her. Guide but don’t show your full self x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

I've seen too many female friendships get fucked up due to men... does your friend have a similar mentality to you towards men and casual sex? If yes, and you can trust her, I'd say you should - it's great having female friends in this "lifestyle". If not, avoid, no cock is worth losing a friendship over.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish


"Keep it to yourself, you'll regret it x

Yep. Admittedly a male and a male friend. My best friend was going through tough times and was also going through a very dry spell. I started talking about sites and clubs and had to spell it out for him. He was appalled and we fell out for a while. Thankfully friends again now but a line was crossed. "

Oh dear. He sounds fun

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No don't do it,I did and didn't work well

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uriouscouple83Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

Why not suggest a similar site? Or do you think that it is Fab in particular that she would enjoy?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

No Lana......... I said NO.

Here's another reason.

Right now this is FAB and you can leave it behind when you log off..

If she joins...... it'll be nothing but FAB FAB FAB chat.....

You'll never get away from it. Bitching about who you don't like. Nearly losing it when you realise the same bloke is chasing you both and what's worse you really fancy him.....

but she gets him ....... Then tells you all about it and that's indiscreet ..... so you tell him and he does his nut and give you a rebound fuck and she says to you Who do you think you are fucking the fella I told you about and you say well I knew him first and shes says well give me my pink jumper back and don't ask to borrow it again and you say well fuck you here's your pink jumper and you owe me five quid for a lift and she says whateverrrrrrrrrrr so you report her to her landlord for fiddling the leccy and her leccy gets cut off and she can't use her night time breathing equipment so you have to call an ambulance and spend all night in the hospital while she gets fixed and the bloke you both shagged and said he was a doctor comes onto the ward but he's the fucking porter and you drop the jug of water and he gets a hard on cos you'd done watersports .........

It's just not worth it Lana ......

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend


"No Lana......... I said NO.

Here's another reason.

Right now this is FAB and you can leave it behind when you log off..

If she joins...... it'll be nothing but FAB FAB FAB chat.....

You'll never get away from it. Bitching about who you don't like. Nearly losing it when you realise the same bloke is chasing you both and what's worse you really fancy him.....

but she gets him ....... Then tells you all about it and that's indiscreet ..... so you tell him and he does his nut and give you a rebound fuck and she says to you Who do you think you are fucking the fella I told you about and you say well I knew him first and shes says well give me my pink jumper back and don't ask to borrow it again and you say well fuck you here's your pink jumper and you owe me five quid for a lift and she says whateverrrrrrrrrrr so you report her to her landlord for fiddling the leccy and her leccy gets cut off and she can't use her night time breathing equipment so you have to call an ambulance and spend all night in the hospital while she gets fixed and the bloke you both shagged and said he was a doctor comes onto the ward but he's the fucking porter and you drop the jug of water and he gets a hard on cos you'd done watersports .........

It's just not worth it Lana ...... "
can I have the pink jumper ....just because ...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I told my closest vanilla friend. She was really cool about it, she said she was intrigued about learning more.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No Lana......... I said NO.

Here's another reason.

Right now this is FAB and you can leave it behind when you log off..

If she joins...... it'll be nothing but FAB FAB FAB chat.....

You'll never get away from it. Bitching about who you don't like. Nearly losing it when you realise the same bloke is chasing you both and what's worse you really fancy him.....

but she gets him ....... Then tells you all about it and that's indiscreet ..... so you tell him and he does his nut and give you a rebound fuck and she says to you Who do you think you are fucking the fella I told you about and you say well I knew him first and shes says well give me my pink jumper back and don't ask to borrow it again and you say well fuck you here's your pink jumper and you owe me five quid for a lift and she says whateverrrrrrrrrrr so you report her to her landlord for fiddling the leccy and her leccy gets cut off and she can't use her night time breathing equipment so you have to call an ambulance and spend all night in the hospital while she gets fixed and the bloke you both shagged and said he was a doctor comes onto the ward but he's the fucking porter and you drop the jug of water and he gets a hard on cos you'd done watersports .........

It's just not worth it Lana ...... "

Your imagination is impeccable!

Or is this based on real life events..?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My male and female best friend are on here and they know I am. My male friend was the one who pointed me in the direction.

My female friend and I go for entirely different men... She is a bit more open than I am and will discuss who is messaging her. I keep quiet. I know she reads the forum too but doesn't post x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton

I tend to keep Fab friends , work friends and close friends , London meet-up friends separate from each other. It works better for me that way.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No Lana......... I said NO.

Here's another reason.

Right now this is FAB and you can leave it behind when you log off..

If she joins...... it'll be nothing but FAB FAB FAB chat.....

You'll never get away from it. Bitching about who you don't like. Nearly losing it when you realise the same bloke is chasing you both and what's worse you really fancy him.....

but she gets him ....... Then tells you all about it and that's indiscreet ..... so you tell him and he does his nut and give you a rebound fuck and she says to you Who do you think you are fucking the fella I told you about and you say well I knew him first and shes says well give me my pink jumper back and don't ask to borrow it again and you say well fuck you here's your pink jumper and you owe me five quid for a lift and she says whateverrrrrrrrrrr so you report her to her landlord for fiddling the leccy and her leccy gets cut off and she can't use her night time breathing equipment so you have to call an ambulance and spend all night in the hospital while she gets fixed and the bloke you both shagged and said he was a doctor comes onto the ward but he's the fucking porter and you drop the jug of water and he gets a hard on cos you'd done watersports .........

It's just not worth it Lana ...... "

!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Didn't invite her in the end so I have you all to myself

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet


"There is a very strong chance you'll overlap with men so it just depends how you feel about that,it's a tricky one I don't know."

Yep if you live near each other you'll be fishing in the same pool, so to speak.

If you're both ok with chatting, flirting and maybe more with the same people then go for it but it could potentially be a bit of a minefield.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it depends on your friendship. If you're really close with complete trust and you are not afraid to show the true 'fab' you when you're around her then I can't see an issue with asking her to join. But, if there is even a small amount of doubt that makes you think no then I would keep this place your filthy secret!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Didn't invite her in the end so I have you all to myself "

I think this is wise, she may discover it for herself though x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lbinoGorillaMan
over a year ago

Redditch


"Didn't invite her in the end so I have you all to myself "

Well, that's nice in a way - glad to have you - bit if your friend is as good looking as you then that'd be two of you to perve over

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

No, don't introduce her to fab. Unless you have absolutely nothing that you gain from here aidex by the privacy. Hesitation etc says no.

She's not in a crisis, where fab is the only solution either. Nor is fab going away, so keep it as yours, until and if rgere is never any gains that you get, or lose all hesitations.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

A good friend of mine joined after I confided in her. It was fun at first, then it was how do i do this, how do I do that, will you take some pics for me, have you heard of such and such, can you check out so and so for me, why does he still want to meet other women when he's met me, and so on. She left after a few weeks because she didn't like some of the crappy messages she got.

You made a good decision there OP

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ichaelsmyMan
over a year ago

douglas

sound her out as to what she likes, interests her and see if it is the kind of thing she would like.

do it with a couple of glasses of wine and then you can claim it was the wine talking

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place


"My friend and I have had a right giggle being on here. It's been comical receiving the same copy & pasted messages "

I don’t send copy and paste messages! And I can’t even message you!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That is a dilemma. Personally I wouldn't. I have friends on here and it has changed our friendship. If she finds it herself then fair enough but I wouldn't recommend it no.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London

Really depends on the type of friendship you have. If you're close enough to share your "second" life, then sure, go ahead... Even i have been occasionally tempted to do so, but life is easier keeping fab life to myself. I can switch off whenever i want to.

Alternatively, play cupids slutty cousin and hook her up but keeping the fab bit Hush hush :"i know Lana through a mutual friend "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks very much everyone, really helpful points.

She does know pretty much everything I get up to, but without specifics or the source. We have a kind of 'wink wink, nudge nudge' thing when I say I'm meeting someone from "Tinder" as she knows that's not the site I use, she just doesn't know which one it is. And she's on the same wavelength generally re casual sex, but two main things would make me keep us separate - Granny's point about Fab coming into to our normal conversations and the risk of us sleeping with the same person. I personally think I could probably handle that, but I don't think she could. So the outcome was that she's pretty much decided to have a while doing no different from I do, but she'll just do it via online dating sites.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top