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It's me, not you...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Loads of comments on the league thread showed people automatically blame themselves when they've not had a reply to a message.

In the interest of transparency (which I think is the best thing about the forum) I just thought I'd point out that it might not be anything you've done wrong at all.

As well as commonly cited reasons like just not fancying them, the message was rubbish or interests not matching...I know, for me anyway, there are loads of reasons I've not responded in the past that were nothing to do with them being unappealing.

Reasons for me have included;

They look like an ex

They look like a relative

I think I might recognise them in real life

I'm in a bad mood

I have too much on to realistically make plans

Someone else has my attention at that point

I just want a mooch on the forum and can't be bothered chatting 1 on 1

I feel fat, bloated and too unsexy to flirt

A nasty message has knocked my confidence temporarily

I meant to reply but just forgot

What other reasons have stopped you getting into a chat at some point, but due to no fault of the person messaging?

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I’m simply a miserable sod

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Eats magnums like a serial killer

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m simply a miserable sod "

Good enough a reason as any

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Noted.

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

?

I don't even look at my inbox most of the time, so I wouldn't know who I've got a message from or what they say. There are very few people that I'm attracted to, so I've always preferred to do the hunting myself

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By *affron40Woman
over a year ago

manchester

It’s not someone I know or via a forum thread.. I generally ignore it completely.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Eats magnums like a serial killer "

Justified

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes I’m just not up for chat.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"Loads of comments on the league thread showed people automatically blame themselves when they've not had a reply to a message.

In the interest of transparency (which I think is the best thing about the forum) I just thought I'd point out that it might not be anything you've done wrong at all.

As well as commonly cited reasons like just not fancying them, the message was rubbish or interests not matching...I know, for me anyway, there are loads of reasons I've not responded in the past that were nothing to do with them being unappealing.

Reasons for me have included;

They look like an ex

They look like a relative

I think I might recognise them in real life

I'm in a bad mood

I have too much on to realistically make plans

Someone else has my attention at that point

I just want a mooch on the forum and can't be bothered chatting 1 on 1

I feel fat, bloated and too unsexy to flirt

A nasty message has knocked my confidence temporarily

I meant to reply but just forgot

What other reasons have stopped you getting into a chat at some point, but due to no fault of the person messaging?"

Excellent post!

For me, it's generally that I don't have the time.

Mrs TMN x

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

They’re straight

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it's not me...it's them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you listed most.

If I dont reply, I just prefer talking crap on here, rather than engaging 1:1 some days.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I forget to reply

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I have to be in the mood to be chatty.

Like I’m usually a low energy 30 watt lightbulb just radiating out a low glow, but to get chat out of me I have to turn myself into a 60 watt lightbulb to really shine.

And that don’t happen often!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

True story - i was once told that a lady didn't want to meet ne because she thought i was nice.

She went on to explain that she wanted nasty sex and thought i was too nice for that.

Quite a compliment - in a way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great list OP.... Usernames and profile pics of certain parts of the anatomy can also be enough to cause me to hit delete!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Loads of comments on the league thread showed people automatically blame themselves when they've not had a reply to a message.

In the interest of transparency (which I think is the best thing about the forum) I just thought I'd point out that it might not be anything you've done wrong at all.

As well as commonly cited reasons like just not fancying them, the message was rubbish or interests not matching...I know, for me anyway, there are loads of reasons I've not responded in the past that were nothing to do with them being unappealing.

Reasons for me have included;

They look like an ex

They look like a relative

I think I might recognise them in real life

I'm in a bad mood

I have too much on to realistically make plans

Someone else has my attention at that point

I just want a mooch on the forum and can't be bothered chatting 1 on 1

I feel fat, bloated and too unsexy to flirt

A nasty message has knocked my confidence temporarily

I meant to reply but just forgot

What other reasons have stopped you getting into a chat at some point, but due to no fault of the person messaging?"

Me I thought it’s due to depression and anxiety

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