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"This is an excellent question and perhaps only someone who had experienced both sight and then reduced sight/blindness could comment? " I guess it might be different between people born blind and people that go blind later in life. | |||
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"Hmmm attraction and engagement for me are in the mind... I don't really judge based on bodies /faces? " That’s good news for me!! | |||
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"This is an excellent question and perhaps only someone who had experienced both sight and then reduced sight/blindness could comment? I guess it might be different between people born blind and people that go blind later in life. " Indeed, but someone blind from birth would probably be unable to comment about the influence of looks on attraction. I think you've asked a chicken and egg question | |||
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"Hmmm attraction and engagement for me are in the mind... I don't really judge based on bodies /faces? " This really, vision is just one sense. Sexuality can be determined through all of the others, perhaps in less immediately obvious ways but possibly more deeply sensed.... (Men bloody stink!) | |||
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"Hmmm attraction and engagement for me are in the mind... I don't really judge based on bodies /faces? That’s good news for me!! Lol... Helps if they have nice pants " It just keeps on getting better. But I don’t believe you! There must be some element of visual attraction or repulsion. I believe you about the pants though (obvs!) | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. " I’m sure there is more but the visual element is a large part, at least initially. | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. " I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I’m sure there is more but the visual element is a large part, at least initially. " I might have misunderstood your question though. | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? " I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. | |||
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"I’ve been thinking! No! Don’t groan. I’m attracted to women often without knowing them purely on how they look! (Shallow huh!) If I was blind I wouldn’t be able to be visually attracted to someone so it would be based more on personality. Kind, warm, intelligent, funny people can be of any gender. So are blind people more fluid in their sexuality? " That's a good question, I know when I have been blind folded before everything is heightened but I know who is in the room with me, I can't imagine what it would be like to not of ever seen the person | |||
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"They are more likely to listen to the words and soul of the individual, than be blinded by the the outer cover " That’s sort of the point I’m making. Once you remove the ‘cover’ of gender then what’s left is character. | |||
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"Hmmm attraction and engagement for me are in the mind... I don't really judge based on bodies /faces? That’s good news for me!! Lol... Helps if they have nice pants It just keeps on getting better. But I don’t believe you! There must be some element of visual attraction or repulsion. I believe you about the pants though (obvs!)" So irl, i'd make judgements on whether I'd want to engage them in conversation msybe? But no, actually i talk and flirt with EVERYONE in real life On here i read profile to see if it entices me (the written word is very powerful).. I look at photos from perspective of are they nicely taken / interesting / tantalising /doing activities i like .. And in fact on my profile i ask people not to send face pics ... I have to know the person first.... Otherwise they are most likely friend zoned But its ok.. I know I'm weird | |||
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"The visual is a small part of what makes someone attractive. The type of men I am attracted to varies massively though largely personality is a massive draw. Visually they are very different, tend to share certain characteristics. " I don’t doubt that, but what makes you more attracted to men than women? | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? " I know some people are attracted to the person, not the gender. I'm not sure that being visually impaired impacts on your sexuality. I'd ask my dad if I thought he'd understand the question | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. " So it's one thing to wonder about whether someone sexual orientation would be influenced by sight or no sight, versus the extent to which they would be attracted to one man vs another, for example, if they happen to know they are a straight woman. Does that make sense?! | |||
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"They are more likely to listen to the words and soul of the individual, than be blinded by the the outer cover That’s sort of the point I’m making. Once you remove the ‘cover’ of gender then what’s left is character. " But gender is determined by more than visual things such as by their voices and the touch of skin. | |||
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"Hmmm attraction and engagement for me are in the mind... I don't really judge based on bodies /faces? That’s good news for me!! Lol... Helps if they have nice pants It just keeps on getting better. But I don’t believe you! There must be some element of visual attraction or repulsion. I believe you about the pants though (obvs!) So irl, i'd make judgements on whether I'd want to engage them in conversation msybe? But no, actually i talk and flirt with EVERYONE in real life On here i read profile to see if it entices me (the written word is very powerful).. I look at photos from perspective of are they nicely taken / interesting / tantalising /doing activities i like .. And in fact on my profile i ask people not to send face pics ... I have to know the person first.... Otherwise they are most likely friend zoned But its ok.. I know I'm weird " Weird but wonderful! I agree that personality is more important in the long run. | |||
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"The visual is a small part of what makes someone attractive. The type of men I am attracted to varies massively though largely personality is a massive draw. Visually they are very different, tend to share certain characteristics. " I look for similar traits i guess in 'my' men.. Assurance, confidence, height, observant / quiet but commanding?! | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. So it's one thing to wonder about whether someone sexual orientation would be influenced by sight or no sight, versus the extent to which they would be attracted to one man vs another, for example, if they happen to know they are a straight woman. Does that make sense?! " Yes, but it begs the question, how does someone know they are a straight woman? Isn’t it because they are sexually attracted to men? | |||
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"The visual is a small part of what makes someone attractive. The type of men I am attracted to varies massively though largely personality is a massive draw. Visually they are very different, tend to share certain characteristics. I look for similar traits i guess in 'my' men.. Assurance, confidence, height, observant / quiet but commanding?! " You left off good pants! Tsk | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. So it's one thing to wonder about whether someone sexual orientation would be influenced by sight or no sight, versus the extent to which they would be attracted to one man vs another, for example, if they happen to know they are a straight woman. Does that make sense?! Yes, but it begs the question, how does someone know they are a straight woman? Isn’t it because they are sexually attracted to men? " And that's the million dollar question! For me, smell has a massive part in attraction to a guy, so I'm assuming for me, that would be the same whether I could see or not? But I'll never know whilst I have sight..... | |||
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"They are more likely to listen to the words and soul of the individual, than be blinded by the the outer cover That’s sort of the point I’m making. Once you remove the ‘cover’ of gender then what’s left is character. " I misunderstood your question then, as I was referring to aesthetics looking beyond beauty is only skin deep. Removing gender qualities is a whole different aspect, as neutralises all to just using their inner qualities.... but would removing their gender also remove the aesthetics you would require for sexual activity ? | |||
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"The visual is a small part of what makes someone attractive. The type of men I am attracted to varies massively though largely personality is a massive draw. Visually they are very different, tend to share certain characteristics. I look for similar traits i guess in 'my' men.. Assurance, confidence, height, observant / quiet but commanding?! " Absolutely.... very similar here it’s a connection something that’s just there or not. So when someone says what are you looking for or what’s your type....I’ve no idea I don’t have a box that anyone fits into! | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. So it's one thing to wonder about whether someone sexual orientation would be influenced by sight or no sight, versus the extent to which they would be attracted to one man vs another, for example, if they happen to know they are a straight woman. Does that make sense?! Yes, but it begs the question, how does someone know they are a straight woman? Isn’t it because they are sexually attracted to men? And that's the million dollar question! For me, smell has a massive part in attraction to a guy, so I'm assuming for me, that would be the same whether I could see or not? But I'll never know whilst I have sight..... " Do men smell that much different to women? I mean without the perfume or cologne? | |||
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"I’ve been thinking! No! Don’t groan. I’m attracted to women often without knowing them purely on how they look! (Shallow huh!) If I was blind I wouldn’t be able to be visually attracted to someone so it would be based more on personality. Kind, warm, intelligent, funny people can be of any gender. So are blind people more fluid in their sexuality? " Sexuality and attraction are different things all together... | |||
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"The visual is a small part of what makes someone attractive. The type of men I am attracted to varies massively though largely personality is a massive draw. Visually they are very different, tend to share certain characteristics. I look for similar traits i guess in 'my' men.. Assurance, confidence, height, observant / quiet but commanding?! Absolutely.... very similar here it’s a connection something that’s just there or not. So when someone says what are you looking for or what’s your type....I’ve no idea I don’t have a box that anyone fits into! " Made me | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. So it's one thing to wonder about whether someone sexual orientation would be influenced by sight or no sight, versus the extent to which they would be attracted to one man vs another, for example, if they happen to know they are a straight woman. Does that make sense?! Yes, but it begs the question, how does someone know they are a straight woman? Isn’t it because they are sexually attracted to men? And that's the million dollar question! For me, smell has a massive part in attraction to a guy, so I'm assuming for me, that would be the same whether I could see or not? But I'll never know whilst I have sight..... Do men smell that much different to women? I mean without the perfume or cologne? " Oh yes yes. Men smell VERY different to me. Some smell god-awful, others smell so good that just the smell alone is enough to get me excited. My husband, for example, smells so delicious that I can't even explain it | |||
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"I’ve been thinking! No! Don’t groan. I’m attracted to women often without knowing them purely on how they look! (Shallow huh!) If I was blind I wouldn’t be able to be visually attracted to someone so it would be based more on personality. Kind, warm, intelligent, funny people can be of any gender. So are blind people more fluid in their sexuality? Sexuality and attraction are different things all together... " Are sexuality and sexual attraction very different though? Which is what I meant. | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. So it's one thing to wonder about whether someone sexual orientation would be influenced by sight or no sight, versus the extent to which they would be attracted to one man vs another, for example, if they happen to know they are a straight woman. Does that make sense?! Yes, but it begs the question, how does someone know they are a straight woman? Isn’t it because they are sexually attracted to men? And that's the million dollar question! For me, smell has a massive part in attraction to a guy, so I'm assuming for me, that would be the same whether I could see or not? But I'll never know whilst I have sight..... Do men smell that much different to women? I mean without the perfume or cologne? Oh yes yes. Men smell VERY different to me. Some smell god-awful, others smell so good that just the smell alone is enough to get me excited. My husband, for example, smells so delicious that I can't even explain it " He must have good pheromones! | |||
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"I can see some really beautiful, incredibly sexy women but I'd still be straight. If I was blind I could meet some really lovely women but still be straight. I think there's quite a lot more to sexuality than the visual. I'm wondering if the question is about sexuality, eg straight, gay etc or sexual attraction to the preferred gender(s)? I’m not sure I understand the difference you are trying to draw out. I’m mostly straight (a little bit curious). I’m attracted to women mostly but not all women. But the women that I am sexually attracted to can be purely visual if it’s just a picture or video that I’m looking at. So it's one thing to wonder about whether someone sexual orientation would be influenced by sight or no sight, versus the extent to which they would be attracted to one man vs another, for example, if they happen to know they are a straight woman. Does that make sense?! Yes, but it begs the question, how does someone know they are a straight woman? Isn’t it because they are sexually attracted to men? And that's the million dollar question! For me, smell has a massive part in attraction to a guy, so I'm assuming for me, that would be the same whether I could see or not? But I'll never know whilst I have sight..... Do men smell that much different to women? I mean without the perfume or cologne? Oh yes yes. Men smell VERY different to me. Some smell god-awful, others smell so good that just the smell alone is enough to get me excited. My husband, for example, smells so delicious that I can't even explain it He must have good pheromones! " Oh he does. His smell is just divine to me. But someone else might think its horrid (I will kick those people in the bits ) | |||
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" Sexuality and attraction are different things all together... Are sexuality and sexual attraction very different though? Which is what I meant. " So is the question more why are people attracted to a gender? Or what makes someone attractive sexually? | |||
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"I think (and you're not the only one!) that you place a lot of emphasis on the visual, so for you, you're attracted to women because of how they look primarily. I'm attracted to people not because of their gender and the physical signs of that but because of who they are (although physicality is important it's not a driving factor). I don't think lack of sight changes/alters someone's sexuality, I think there are lots of key indicators that aren't just the physical. And I cba to read the whole thread so apologies if repeating previous comments! " From the neuroscience I’ve studied everyone (that is sighted) makes very quick subconscious judgements about other people based on appearance. We put people into in groups and out groups in fractions of a second. Un-conscious bias is real. That doesn’t mean that as we get to know someone that we won’t develop attraction or go off someone based on their personality. I fell deeply in love with someone I didn’t find attractive immediately. | |||
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" Sexuality and attraction are different things all together... Are sexuality and sexual attraction very different though? Which is what I meant. So is the question more why are people attracted to a gender? Or what makes someone attractive sexually? " I guess the first one? | |||
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"For me there has to be a facial attraction, whether that's piercing eyes, cheeks you want to wiggle or a dimpled chin. " And that can be a man or a woman? | |||
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" From the neuroscience I’ve studied everyone (that is sighted) makes very quick subconscious judgements about other people based on appearance. We put people into in groups and out groups in fractions of a second. Un-conscious bias is real. That doesn’t mean that as we get to know someone that we won’t develop attraction or go off someone based on their personality. I fell deeply in love with someone I didn’t find attractive immediately. " I do know about un-conscious bias Vine. It's quite important for work. I do think that some people place more of an emphasis on the visual when it comes to sexual partners, others less so. I'm not saying one is right and the other is wrong nor people aren't fluid in their approaches and well... life happens. That's not to say physicality isn't important (as I typed earlier), it's just not *as* important to me. Yes, there are certain things I find aesthetically pleasing but it's not as key. I think, after reading previous comments finally, that someone's gender is far more than how they look. So for someone who is visually impaired, they can still identify as straight or as gay (to name two) because there are other characteristics that they like that aren't visual. It's an interesting question anyway even though I've gone on a tangent! | |||
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"In my experience no. Your gender isn't just about what you look like. Voices are quite distinctive for the sexes as are smells and attitudes. There are very few people who are totally blind, i.e. Zero light perception. Most people who are blind are actually able to see a little. Initial attraction for people who are blind often stems from voices. Accent, warmth, pitch, tone. Obviously not always, but in my experience mostly. (What's with the obsession with being blind all of a sudden?)" I don’t think it’s an obsession! I was just pondering about what makes us sexually attracted to another person. A thought experiment that I shared on here. I think it started because I was mulling over the phrase blind date. It got me thinking about attraction and how much of that is visual. That’s made me wonder more about what influences our sexuality the most! | |||
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"If so many people above claim not to be attracted visually to others. Should this site remove pictures and videos and the ability to say if you are male or female etc. Should all meetings be blind dates based purely on personality alone? I doubt that would work very well. " No, cos I'd want smell-o-vision | |||
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"If so many people above claim not to be attracted visually to others. Should this site remove pictures and videos and the ability to say if you are male or female etc. Should all meetings be blind dates based purely on personality alone? I doubt that would work very well. No, cos I'd want smell-o-vision " Scratch and sniff? Maybe available on iOS15! | |||
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"In my experience no. Your gender isn't just about what you look like. Voices are quite distinctive for the sexes as are smells and attitudes. There are very few people who are totally blind, i.e. Zero light perception. Most people who are blind are actually able to see a little. Initial attraction for people who are blind often stems from voices. Accent, warmth, pitch, tone. Obviously not always, but in my experience mostly. (What's with the obsession with being blind all of a sudden?) I don’t think it’s an obsession! I was just pondering about what makes us sexually attracted to another person. A thought experiment that I shared on here. I think it started because I was mulling over the phrase blind date. It got me thinking about attraction and how much of that is visual. That’s made me wonder more about what influences our sexuality the most! " The comment was more aimed at the fact the it's the second post about being blind in as many days. Not a dig at you. | |||
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"I’ve been thinking! No! Don’t groan. I’m attracted to women often without knowing them purely on how they look! (Shallow huh!) If I was blind I wouldn’t be able to be visually attracted to someone so it would be based more on personality. Kind, warm, intelligent, funny people can be of any gender. So are blind people more fluid in their sexuality? " This would be an interesting question to ask on a forum which is not text-based. | |||
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