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A discussion about bi men.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

last night i was chatting to a group of 4 women friends of mine.we we chatting about certain things and then one of the ladies asked if i ever see my ex husband who is gay.i dont see him. Then the discussion went on to what they would do if they discovered that their partner was bi or gay? They all said they woudnt stay with a man who was that way inclined as they woudnt trust him, which i knew they would say anyway. But then i said? Well they might be and you might never find out? And its true.how would they know if they were or not.the look of their faces said it all.

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

It must be awful to live a lie and not feel you can be honest,they're not only deceiving themselves but their partners. I've always fancied a bi partner,imagine if I'd married one but they didn't let on til year's later what a waste.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Why do people think bi people are more likely to cheat though? I've dated bi men but only ever been cheated on by straight guys. Maybe I should stop trusting straight men.

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea


"Why do people think bi people are more likely to cheat though? I've dated bi men but only ever been cheated on by straight guys. Maybe I should stop trusting straight men. "
?? I don’t understand either .My husband is bi and I have never once worried he might cheat on me ..People cheat regardless of there sexuality.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why do people think bi people are more likely to cheat though? I've dated bi men but only ever been cheated on by straight guys. Maybe I should stop trusting straight men. "

They see us as promiscuous. Having a larger pool of options means anyone who could be a friend could also be a secret lover. It stems from a lack of trust.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

To be honest, this would not have crossed my mind until I joined Fab.

But I think Fab tends to amplify people’s perception of sexual things. We believe that the Fab way is the everyday way of the world.

When in reality, the everyday world is still pretty much as it was, it’s just our way of looking at things has changed.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

I think it incredibly sad and shallow that someone would leave another because they admit to being bi. Feelings change over time as you become more sexually free and open to the idea of new things, it could be something they never realised or admitted to themselves until later in life. Does it really make you stop loving them? Why would that be an indicator that they would cheat on you?

If anything embrace their honesty and that they had the strength to admit it to themselves and you, as someone thru love and trust

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"To be honest, this would not have crossed my mind until I joined Fab.

But I think Fab tends to amplify people’s perception of sexual things. We believe that the Fab way is the everyday way of the world.

When in reality, the everyday world is still pretty much as it was, it’s just our way of looking at things has changed. "

That's a great point well made

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

Perhaps feeling of ownership takes over unconditional love when things get sexually challenging. I never understand this attitude to be honest, if someone wants to cheat, they will cheat anyway and you may not have a clue.

I’d much rather be told by my husband (bi,gay) rather than scared to talk to me. Must be awful to live a life with imprisoned feelings

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is a massive misconception to hi guys I am bi and I don’t hide that as I’m not ashamed and I can honestly say I have never cheated.

I am more into swinging and like to share when I’m a relationship but my ex was vanilla and while I was with her I never looked at another.

Then I got unhappy and separated from her I never cheated and never would.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To be honest, this would not have crossed my mind until I joined Fab.

But I think Fab tends to amplify people’s perception of sexual things. We believe that the Fab way is the everyday way of the world.

When in reality, the everyday world is still pretty much as it was, it’s just our way of looking at things has changed. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It really is sad...

Just cos a guy fancies other guys doesn't mean he will want to fuck them all. People should know better than all that homophobic bollocks these days.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I read that as Bin Men....really do need a post lockdown eye test

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By *rx1Couple
over a year ago

North of Okehampton, South of Bideford

The OP made a Point of saying “ You might never Know’

It has nothing to do with promiscuity or cheating.

it is to do with Living a Lie

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

Clearly for the op it was not a good situation but to be spreading the seeds of doubt among others whilst one way of dealing with the hurt suggests an agenda that is far from positive..

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Why do people think bi people are more likely to cheat though? I've dated bi men but only ever been cheated on by straight guys. Maybe I should stop trusting straight men. "
thank you for your reply. Great answer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Why do people think bi people are more likely to cheat though? I've dated bi men but only ever been cheated on by straight guys. Maybe I should stop trusting straight men. thank you for your reply. Great answer "

Denise haven’t you put up statements saying you won’t meet bi men as they always pick cock over women

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By *uriouscouple83Couple
over a year ago

Worcester

I’ve been happily married to an openly bisexual man for 14 years and no problems with him wandering off behind my back. I know plenty of women who have been cheated on by their partner going off with other women though.

I just wished we had plucked up the courage to make the most of it and play as a couple earlier.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

the three main digs i got off people were 1. why didnt i know? 2. did i turn him gay 3. no decent man will want me because of being married to a gay man. Nasty horrible people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The OP made a Point of saying “ You might never Know’

It has nothing to do with promiscuity or cheating.

it is to do with Living a Lie"

You might never know what though? If someone is bi? They are most likely afraid of being treated negatively and losing their partners even though they have done nothing wrong.

It's when they feel they have to hide it is when they might act out of frustration behind their partner's back and cause problems. The issue is the perception of bisexuals being more likely to be unfaithful.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"the three main digs i got off people were 1. why didnt i know? 2. did i turn him gay 3. no decent man will want me because of being married to a gay man. Nasty horrible people."

Sorry to hear that. People can be so ignorant.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I (Luke) am not bi and have hardly ever had feelings that could be thought of that way. I do know that if I was, my OH Hannah would be fine with it and allow me to explore my sexuality as long as it didn't negatively impact on our relationship.

She is bi (our profile says bi-curious but I think we can safely say she's well beyond that now!) and I don't feel insecure if she wants to be with a woman (with or without me present). I know our relationship is strong and whatever exploration we do individually does not mean that we aren't no. 1 for each other.

Neither of us see bisexuality as something to be afraid of.

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By *estinyIsAllCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

Strange. All my ex boyfriends were straight yet the only person that has been loyal to me is my bisexual husband. Maybe people should stop judging others on their sexuality and on the types of people they are instead.

Just a thought.

Also, I can imagine the fuss that would be kicked up if a man said "bisexual women can't be trusted".

Lou x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"the three main digs i got off people were 1. why didnt i know? 2. did i turn him gay 3. no decent man will want me because of being married to a gay man. Nasty horrible people."

Yes people can be nasty.

Now do you understand why he felt he couldn't come out? He was probably trying to protect you both.

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea


"Strange. All my ex boyfriends were straight yet the only person that has been loyal to me is my bisexual husband. Maybe people should stop judging others on their sexuality and on the types of people they are instead.

Just a thought.

Also, I can imagine the fuss that would be kicked up if a man said "bisexual women can't be trusted".

Lou x"

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham


"I think it incredibly sad and shallow that someone would leave another because they admit to being bi. Feelings change over time as you become more sexually free and open to the idea of new things, it could be something they never realised or admitted to themselves until later in life. Does it really make you stop loving them? Why would that be an indicator that they would cheat on you?

If anything embrace their honesty and that they had the strength to admit it to themselves and you, as someone thru love and trust

"

Absolutely this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"the three main digs i got off people were 1. why didnt i know? 2. did i turn him gay 3. no decent man will want me because of being married to a gay man. Nasty horrible people.

Yes people can be nasty.

Now do you understand why he felt he couldn't come out? He was probably trying to protect you both."

So it's ok to live a lie, lead someone to believe something that isn't true, for years....cos people might be mean?

Nah, sorry. I've every sympathy with those who find it hard to come out, but you don't have to include another person in that battle.

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol"

Homophobia.

Some people are stupid enough to think that being bisexual makes a man willing to fuck anyone or that he will want to jump any man he sees.

Ignorance is rife unfortunately.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/08/20 11:31:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol"

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think it incredibly sad and shallow that someone would leave another because they admit to being bi. Feelings change over time as you become more sexually free and open to the idea of new things, it could be something they never realised or admitted to themselves until later in life. Does it really make you stop loving them? Why would that be an indicator that they would cheat on you?

If anything embrace their honesty and that they had the strength to admit it to themselves and you, as someone thru love and trust

"
I agree entirely, well put!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

"

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"the three main digs i got off people were 1. why didnt i know? 2. did i turn him gay 3. no decent man will want me because of being married to a gay man. Nasty horrible people."

Sorry OP you suffered those comments from, what I can only describe as, ignorant individuals

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth."

That's your truth. It doesn't make everyone homophobic because they don't want to have sex with non straights.

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

[Removed by poster at 19/08/20 11:33:55]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

That's your truth. It doesn't make everyone homophobic because they don't want to have sex with non straights. "

We'll have to agree to disagree on that Granny...

If the decision is based purely on the fact they are bi, then yes, they are homophobic.

If you'd not knock a guy back based on the women he's fucked, why the men?

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool


"I think it incredibly sad and shallow that someone would leave another because they admit to being bi. Feelings change over time as you become more sexually free and open to the idea of new things, it could be something they never realised or admitted to themselves until later in life. Does it really make you stop loving them? Why would that be an indicator that they would cheat on you?

If anything embrace their honesty and that they had the strength to admit it to themselves and you, as someone thru love and trust

I agree entirely, well put! "

Great comment and point

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth."

Calling people homophobic because they don't want to fuck bi men is what makes this even worse.

It's exactly the same as when some men get abusive if they get turned down.

They just don't want to fuck bi men. Calling them names is childish.

A bi man calling me homophobic will not make me want to fuck him. Silly me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess a much as I disagree with these types of views on sexuality, we can prevent folk from having freedom of personal choice. That said, I'd probably excercise my own freedom of choice by not wishing to be too close with someone who would judge a person based on their sexuality....

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth."

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Homophobia.

Some people are stupid enough to think that being bisexual makes a man willing to fuck anyone or that he will want to jump any man he sees.

Ignorance is rife unfortunately."

Exactly right, although not saying they would be all homophobic. Personally i'm always open and honest it's the easiest way to be. Especially in the long run as it doesn't cause issues further down the line and you're more happier that you're not hiding anything from anyone. Also this way you'll meet the people that are right for you.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Strange. All my ex boyfriends were straight yet the only person that has been loyal to me is my bisexual husband. Maybe people should stop judging others on their sexuality and on the types of people they are instead.

Just a thought.

Also, I can imagine the fuss that would be kicked up if a man said "bisexual women can't be trusted".

Lou x"

Good points.

The 'fuss' that would be kicked up is that men would LOVE the idea cos they think it means they'll get an illusive threesome.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

The only true way to know is if you found spunk stains on the back of their undies when doing the washing

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

It's all personal choice on what people find attractive, don't think most would be homophobic maybe a few. Personally best way to be is be honest with yourself honest with others and you'll find the right people for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true."

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true."

That is NOT what I'm saying!

Not finding gay/bi sex appealing does not make you homophobic!

But if there's a guy you'd otherwise be keen on that you avoided PURELY because he's been with other guys in the past, you are homophobic.

Surely if he's not fucking them in front of you, it makes no odds? Unless you're homophobic...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's all personal choice on what people find attractive, don't think most would be homophobic maybe a few. Personally best way to be is be honest with yourself honest with others and you'll find the right people for you."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice...... "

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter? "

Please can you let me know what reasons are acceptable for if I'm not attracted to someone and I don't want to fuck them?

If I find a man attractive but then find out he's married should I fuck him anyway so that I don't get called cheatphobic?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

That's your truth. It doesn't make everyone homophobic because they don't want to have sex with non straights.

We'll have to agree to disagree on that Granny...

If the decision is based purely on the fact they are bi, then yes, they are homophobic.

If you'd not knock a guy back based on the women he's fucked, why the men? "

It's okay to disagree. It's how knowledge is built.

I still disagree. Your arguments are tautologically fraught.

If someone decides not to have sex with someone because they are bi, their choice would be based on the information that their prospective partner was bi not on their selection of previous partners.

And there could be one of a thousand reasons why someone does not want sex with a 'bi' person. It doesn't make them homophobic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter? "

It's my view that a person can choose not to have sex for whatever reason they like - we don't have to slurr them for what does and doesn't turn them on, do we? I wouldn't get pissy with the couples on here who only shag black bi men, it's their choice on a sex site and I wouldn't want them to pity fuck me for equalities sake.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter?

Please can you let me know what reasons are acceptable for if I'm not attracted to someone and I don't want to fuck them?

If I find a man attractive but then find out he's married should I fuck him anyway so that I don't get called cheatphobic?"

That's not the same thing though is it.

If the guy in question is straight, do you find out who he's fucked in case any of them put you off him?

We can argue about it all day, that's my opinion. My belief is that if the ONLY reason you're not into someone is cos they've been with someone of the same sex in the past (not in front of you), you're homophobic.

If you're not attracted to them, that's different. If they're in a relationship with someone and morally you're against that, also, totally different.

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

Come on guys lets just calm down and agree to disagree. Everyone has their own valid opinions there is no right or wrong answer to this, it comes down to personal choice. If a woman isnt into bisexual men thats their choice same way as other women wont be bothered about a guys sexuality.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am bi and never cheat on anyone and wouldn’t dream on it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter?

It's my view that a person can choose not to have sex for whatever reason they like - we don't have to slurr them for what does and doesn't turn them on, do we? I wouldn't get pissy with the couples on here who only shag black bi men, it's their choice on a sex site and I wouldn't want them to pity fuck me for equalities sake..... "

Of course it's your choice! I'd never expect someone to engage with anyone for any other reason than they wanted to.

I'm merely expressing my thoughts on the matter.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter?

Please can you let me know what reasons are acceptable for if I'm not attracted to someone and I don't want to fuck them?

If I find a man attractive but then find out he's married should I fuck him anyway so that I don't get called cheatphobic?

That's not the same thing though is it.

If the guy in question is straight, do you find out who he's fucked in case any of them put you off him?

We can argue about it all day, that's my opinion. My belief is that if the ONLY reason you're not into someone is cos they've been with someone of the same sex in the past (not in front of you), you're homophobic.

If you're not attracted to them, that's different. If they're in a relationship with someone and morally you're against that, also, totally different.

"

Verifications of past meets do put some off. Straight people too.

I don't ask who else they fucked but if I know their past it may put me off, yes.

X

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Come on guys lets just calm down and agree to disagree. Everyone has their own valid opinions there is no right or wrong answer to this, it comes down to personal choice. If a woman isnt into bisexual men thats their choice same way as other women wont be bothered about a guys sexuality."

You must be new here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment. "

Clever lady!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter?

It's my view that a person can choose not to have sex for whatever reason they like - we don't have to slurr them for what does and doesn't turn them on, do we? I wouldn't get pissy with the couples on here who only shag black bi men, it's their choice on a sex site and I wouldn't want them to pity fuck me for equalities sake.....

Of course it's your choice! I'd never expect someone to engage with anyone for any other reason than they wanted to.

I'm merely expressing my thoughts on the matter. "

I hear you, and you're entitled to

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Come on guys lets just calm down and agree to disagree. Everyone has their own valid opinions there is no right or wrong answer to this, it comes down to personal choice. If a woman isnt into bisexual men thats their choice same way as other women wont be bothered about a guys sexuality."

You calm down.

I can't see anyone else being heated.

They are expressing opinions in an interesting discussion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment. "

I think you're quite right here.

I don't think I've ever been turned down for a hook up because I am Bi, but I have had early stage relationships end when the topic came up. Their reason being they thought I would always be tempted or wanting something they could never offer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Come on guys lets just calm down and agree to disagree. Everyone has their own valid opinions there is no right or wrong answer to this, it comes down to personal choice. If a woman isnt into bisexual men thats their choice same way as other women wont be bothered about a guys sexuality.

You calm down.

I can't see anyone else being heated.

They are expressing opinions in an interesting discussion."

people can disagree on things...

Rather enjoying a debate where people aren't being cunts to each other tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Come on guys lets just calm down and agree to disagree. Everyone has their own valid opinions there is no right or wrong answer to this, it comes down to personal choice. If a woman isnt into bisexual men thats their choice same way as other women wont be bothered about a guys sexuality.

You calm down.

I can't see anyone else being heated.

They are expressing opinions in an interesting discussion.

people can disagree on things...

Rather enjoying a debate where people aren't being cunts to each other tbh "

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment. "

Understand all of this. However, if we are talking about a relationship like the OP was, surely the best thing after the revelation is to have a continued frank conversation about it; how long have they felt like this, how strong are these feelings, do they want to act on them, why do you feel you couldn’t tell me before now, the list could go on....

All comes back to communication.... if you can’t be honest with yourself and the person you are with, have non judgmental open conversations, then maybe you aren’t with the right person.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I do like the word cunt. I can't express it publicly so......... before I read any more posts..

Cunntitty cunt cunt cunt....

Nice.......

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool


"Come on guys lets just calm down and agree to disagree. Everyone has their own valid opinions there is no right or wrong answer to this, it comes down to personal choice. If a woman isnt into bisexual men thats their choice same way as other women wont be bothered about a guys sexuality.

You must be new here "

Quite new to the forums bit and already started a massive debate, pretty good start in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/08/20 12:01:59]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter?

It's my view that a person can choose not to have sex for whatever reason they like - we don't have to slurr them for what does and doesn't turn them on, do we? I wouldn't get pissy with the couples on here who only shag black bi men, it's their choice on a sex site and I wouldn't want them to pity fuck me for equalities sake.....

Of course it's your choice! I'd never expect someone to engage with anyone for any other reason than they wanted to.

I'm merely expressing my thoughts on the matter. "

Sorry if I seem irate, I'm tired.

My ex partner is bi, we met men who wanted to meet us, regardless of the sexuality tick box on their profile.

I feel that calling people homophobic for not wanting to fuck a bi person causes issues and is possibly one of the many reasons they daren't admit to being bi.

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By *estinyIsAllCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment.

Understand all of this. However, if we are talking about a relationship like the OP was, surely the best thing after the revelation is to have a continued frank conversation about it; how long have they felt like this, how strong are these feelings, do they want to act on them, why do you feel you couldn’t tell me before now, the list could go on....

All comes back to communication.... if you can’t be honest with yourself and the person you are with, have non judgmental open conversations, then maybe you aren’t with the right person. "

100% agree. Well said.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment.

Understand all of this. However, if we are talking about a relationship like the OP was, surely the best thing after the revelation is to have a continued frank conversation about it; how long have they felt like this, how strong are these feelings, do they want to act on them, why do you feel you couldn’t tell me before now, the list could go on....

All comes back to communication.... if you can’t be honest with yourself and the person you are with, have non judgmental open conversations, then maybe you aren’t with the right person. "

Absolutely, but those conversations are to be had when calm and considered.

I'm thinking the discussion took place and they've gone with their initial reaction, which would be one of "I don't even know the person I married" kinda thing. A place of hurt, rather than a place of consideration.

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By *_MariusMan
over a year ago

Currently Faraway


"the three main digs i got off people were 1. why didnt i know? 2. did i turn him gay 3. no decent man will want me because of being married to a gay man. Nasty horrible people."

Denise, whatever digs you got or still get, people will say whatever crap comes out of their mouth without knowing. For some reason, be it fear, or just selfish lack of honesty, people lie to their partners about their sexuality. You didn't do anything to turn him gay (ffs) and like you've told your friends...it's not something that is etched on people's foreheads anyhow.

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By *icearmsMan
over a year ago

KIDLINGTON


"To be honest, this would not have crossed my mind until I joined Fab.

But I think Fab tends to amplify people’s perception of sexual things. We believe that the Fab way is the everyday way of the world.

When in reality, the everyday world is still pretty much as it was, it’s just our way of looking at things has changed. "

This is absolutely right.. with some of my freinds you could not discuss fab and the idea of multiple partners.. doesn't sit right with them. Doesn't mean either party is wrong but just individual opinions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is being bisexual such a big no no to women? don't understand why. If they're a decent person then it's like any other relationship, I wouldnt think about cheating on someone, ive been cheated on so know that feeling. Just because a guy is bi doesnt mean he's gonna go around shagging anything he can see lol

Because they don't get turned on by the thought of 2 men having sex.

Because they can meet whoever they like and don't have to justify it.

Because they don't want to fuck or have a relationship with a bi man.

So if a straight guy has got an ex girlfriend who you're not turned on by the thought of him fucking...is that the same?

Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth.

Please don't tar all straight people who don't find bisexuality arousing as homophobic as its not very nice or true.

This is actually a very good point! Some folk might find it off-putting, they're not saying don't do it, they're just saying they don't want to be involved...... Aka personal freedom of choice......

If I fucked you, am I involved with all your past sexual partners? No. So if it's not a bisexual act, why does someone's bisexuality matter?

It's my view that a person can choose not to have sex for whatever reason they like - we don't have to slurr them for what does and doesn't turn them on, do we? I wouldn't get pissy with the couples on here who only shag black bi men, it's their choice on a sex site and I wouldn't want them to pity fuck me for equalities sake.....

Of course it's your choice! I'd never expect someone to engage with anyone for any other reason than they wanted to.

I'm merely expressing my thoughts on the matter.

Sorry if I seem irate, I'm tired.

My ex partner is bi, we met men who wanted to meet us, regardless of the sexuality tick box on their profile.

I feel that calling people homophobic for not wanting to fuck a bi person causes issues and is possibly one of the many reasons they daren't admit to being bi. "

We're the opposite, won't meet someone unless they're honest about their bisexuality on their profile, we find too many men are "willing to suck his dick" to get into my knickers...which won't work.

I see your point. But I still believe, if you'd shag them otherwise, but not if they're bi, that is homophobic. If there are other reasons, obviously not, but if that is the only reason you wouldn't. You're judging them purely based on their sexuality, which is what homophobia is.

Obviously not "you" personally...lol

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment.

Understand all of this. However, if we are talking about a relationship like the OP was, surely the best thing after the revelation is to have a continued frank conversation about it; how long have they felt like this, how strong are these feelings, do they want to act on them, why do you feel you couldn’t tell me before now, the list could go on....

All comes back to communication.... if you can’t be honest with yourself and the person you are with, have non judgmental open conversations, then maybe you aren’t with the right person.

Absolutely, but those conversations are to be had when calm and considered.

I'm thinking the discussion took place and they've gone with their initial reaction, which would be one of "I don't even know the person I married" kinda thing. A place of hurt, rather than a place of consideration.

"

Of course the gut reaction could be who are you? But people change and every relationship & individual grows and adapts over time, as we learn more about the world around us, so it is very likely neither of you are the person you married.

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn

I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment.

Understand all of this. However, if we are talking about a relationship like the OP was, surely the best thing after the revelation is to have a continued frank conversation about it; how long have they felt like this, how strong are these feelings, do they want to act on them, why do you feel you couldn’t tell me before now, the list could go on....

All comes back to communication.... if you can’t be honest with yourself and the person you are with, have non judgmental open conversations, then maybe you aren’t with the right person.

Absolutely, but those conversations are to be had when calm and considered.

I'm thinking the discussion took place and they've gone with their initial reaction, which would be one of "I don't even know the person I married" kinda thing. A place of hurt, rather than a place of consideration.

Of course the gut reaction could be who are you? But people change and every relationship & individual grows and adapts over time, as we learn more about the world around us, so it is very likely neither of you are the person you married. "

Indeed. I just think we (humans in general) have a tendency to lash out initially when we get hurt. Sometimes it's easier to play the blame game than it is to self reflect.

Personally I'm of the mindset that couples counselling is likely to be beneficial for most couples, even if they aren't experiencing issues, but to arm them with the tools for when the time arrives. To be able to enter into a difficult conversation confidently, knowing you both have the same end goal would make many relationships far more amicable and secure.

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them."

I respect everyones choices as long as it doesnt hurt anyone, if everyone was the same the world would be a boring place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them."

I really don't understand what is so hard to understand about what I've said.

You say you you don't find bi men sexually appealing, but surely if they're only fucking you at the time, it makes no odds who they fucked in the past.

If a straight guys past fucks wouldn't 've a problem for you, why would a bi guys?

I don't find fisting or water sports sexually appealing, however learning that someone has indulged in either in the past doeant suddenly change how much I fancy them....

Is prejudiced an easier word for you to swallow?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them."

For the record ...NO ONE should fuck anyone they don't want to, for whatever their reason.

That choice is yours. I'm merely expressing my opinion on what leads people to that choice.

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

I respect everyones choices as long as it doesnt hurt anyone, if everyone was the same the world would be a boring place. "

It certainly would. It takes all types to make the world go round.. Im not everyone's type and I respect that fact. But I wouldn't accuse those people of being a straight white chubby woman hater lol. Its just not fair that I could be classed as homophobic because I won't sleep with bisexual men. Jeez my brother won't either! Lol strictly gay for him lol.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment.

Understand all of this. However, if we are talking about a relationship like the OP was, surely the best thing after the revelation is to have a continued frank conversation about it; how long have they felt like this, how strong are these feelings, do they want to act on them, why do you feel you couldn’t tell me before now, the list could go on....

All comes back to communication.... if you can’t be honest with yourself and the person you are with, have non judgmental open conversations, then maybe you aren’t with the right person.

Absolutely, but those conversations are to be had when calm and considered.

I'm thinking the discussion took place and they've gone with their initial reaction, which would be one of "I don't even know the person I married" kinda thing. A place of hurt, rather than a place of consideration.

Of course the gut reaction could be who are you? But people change and every relationship & individual grows and adapts over time, as we learn more about the world around us, so it is very likely neither of you are the person you married.

Indeed. I just think we (humans in general) have a tendency to lash out initially when we get hurt. Sometimes it's easier to play the blame game than it is to self reflect.

Personally I'm of the mindset that couples counselling is likely to be beneficial for most couples, even if they aren't experiencing issues, but to arm them with the tools for when the time arrives. To be able to enter into a difficult conversation confidently, knowing you both have the same end goal would make many relationships far more amicable and secure."

Agree with that both the lashing out and counselling.... it would be better all round if people knew how to handle situations as they arise and work together to get to a solution that suits them both.

Life isn’t a simple road, there will always be bumps along the way, and some car crashes, for me it is how you deal with them on your own and with others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

I respect everyones choices as long as it doesnt hurt anyone, if everyone was the same the world would be a boring place.

It certainly would. It takes all types to make the world go round.. Im not everyone's type and I respect that fact. But I wouldn't accuse those people of being a straight white chubby woman hater lol. Its just not fair that I could be classed as homophobic because I won't sleep with bisexual men. Jeez my brother won't either! Lol strictly gay for him lol."

You're missing the point.

It's not like saying you're not into fat people, or people with dark hair.

You're basing your decision purely based on their sexuality, which, if they are bi and not gay, makes no odds to how into you they will be.

Judging someone purely based on their sexuality is homophobic. Simple.

That's my belief. You can disagree with it of course, but I don't think I'm being unfair.

And it is possible to love gay people AND be homophobic, and even be gay AND homophobic...

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

For the record ...NO ONE should fuck anyone they don't want to, for whatever their reason.

That choice is yours. I'm merely expressing my opinion on what leads people to that choice.

"

I understand that but above you wrote

"Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth."

How is that fair that I would be classed as homophobic by you? If I treated bisexuals in a different way in day to day life that would make me a terrible person. But I don't. I just don't find it appealing at all.

So please think of your words as it's not fair that I could be given an awful name because I have a preference for straight men.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"I'm gonna take a couple of stabs in the dark.

First up, I think it's more likely to be that they wouldn't stay with them not because they wouldn't trust them not to cheat, but because they may feel asthough their partner hadn't been honest with them from the get-go. That's where the lack of trust is likely to have originated, so more projected lack of trust onto the recent revelation.

Secondly, it's a strong possibility that the women would feel initially that they couldn't provide their partner with their wants and desires. Their new sense of "lacking" getting twisted into anger and disappointment.

Understand all of this. However, if we are talking about a relationship like the OP was, surely the best thing after the revelation is to have a continued frank conversation about it; how long have they felt like this, how strong are these feelings, do they want to act on them, why do you feel you couldn’t tell me before now, the list could go on....

All comes back to communication.... if you can’t be honest with yourself and the person you are with, have non judgmental open conversations, then maybe you aren’t with the right person.

Absolutely, but those conversations are to be had when calm and considered.

I'm thinking the discussion took place and they've gone with their initial reaction, which would be one of "I don't even know the person I married" kinda thing. A place of hurt, rather than a place of consideration.

Of course the gut reaction could be who are you? But people change and every relationship & individual grows and adapts over time, as we learn more about the world around us, so it is very likely neither of you are the person you married.

Indeed. I just think we (humans in general) have a tendency to lash out initially when we get hurt. Sometimes it's easier to play the blame game than it is to self reflect.

Personally I'm of the mindset that couples counselling is likely to be beneficial for most couples, even if they aren't experiencing issues, but to arm them with the tools for when the time arrives. To be able to enter into a difficult conversation confidently, knowing you both have the same end goal would make many relationships far more amicable and secure.

Agree with that both the lashing out and counselling.... it would be better all round if people knew how to handle situations as they arise and work together to get to a solution that suits them both.

Life isn’t a simple road, there will always be bumps along the way, and some car crashes, for me it is how you deal with them on your own and with others. "

100%

Many times the question needs to be asked. "What's more important, my relationship or my pride?"

Xx

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

I respect everyones choices as long as it doesnt hurt anyone, if everyone was the same the world would be a boring place.

It certainly would. It takes all types to make the world go round.. Im not everyone's type and I respect that fact. But I wouldn't accuse those people of being a straight white chubby woman hater lol. Its just not fair that I could be classed as homophobic because I won't sleep with bisexual men. Jeez my brother won't either! Lol strictly gay for him lol.

You're missing the point.

It's not like saying you're not into fat people, or people with dark hair.

You're basing your decision purely based on their sexuality, which, if they are bi and not gay, makes no odds to how into you they will be.

Judging someone purely based on their sexuality is homophobic. Simple.

That's my belief. You can disagree with it of course, but I don't think I'm being unfair.

And it is possible to love gay people AND be homophobic, and even be gay AND homophobic...

"

I've certainly seen biphobia in gay and lesbian people .

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

There is considerable research on partner selection.

Not all reasons for rejecting bi or gay partners are homophobic.

Sometimes I don't eat my vegan sausage if the bean juice touched it

Bad analogy but it made me laugh.

There are good reasons for decisions that don't make people phobic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

For the record ...NO ONE should fuck anyone they don't want to, for whatever their reason.

That choice is yours. I'm merely expressing my opinion on what leads people to that choice.

I understand that but above you wrote

"Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth."

How is that fair that I would be classed as homophobic by you? If I treated bisexuals in a different way in day to day life that would make me a terrible person. But I don't. I just don't find it appealing at all.

So please think of your words as it's not fair that I could be given an awful name because I have a preference for straight men."

I've clarified what I meant, several times. And stand by it.

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

I respect everyones choices as long as it doesnt hurt anyone, if everyone was the same the world would be a boring place.

It certainly would. It takes all types to make the world go round.. Im not everyone's type and I respect that fact. But I wouldn't accuse those people of being a straight white chubby woman hater lol. Its just not fair that I could be classed as homophobic because I won't sleep with bisexual men. Jeez my brother won't either! Lol strictly gay for him lol.

You're missing the point.

It's not like saying you're not into fat people, or people with dark hair.

You're basing your decision purely based on their sexuality, which, if they are bi and not gay, makes no odds to how into you they will be.

Judging someone purely based on their sexuality is homophobic. Simple.

That's my belief. You can disagree with it of course, but I don't think I'm being unfair.

And it is possible to love gay people AND be homophobic, and even be gay AND homophobic...

"

I do disagree strongly. How can I love and hate something at the same time.

I ask for respect of choice. That's all. I respect that someone people are bi/gay and I'm happy they are living life to the full... and I ask that my wishes are also respected. Life would be much more simpler if we all respected each other's choices with out being accused of something.

Anyway I'm leaving this here as ive made my point.

Have A Great day

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

For the record ...NO ONE should fuck anyone they don't want to, for whatever their reason.

That choice is yours. I'm merely expressing my opinion on what leads people to that choice.

I understand that but above you wrote

"Homophobia is the ONLY reason a woman or couple won't meet a bi man. Sorry, but that's the truth."

How is that fair that I would be classed as homophobic by you? If I treated bisexuals in a different way in day to day life that would make me a terrible person. But I don't. I just don't find it appealing at all.

So please think of your words as it's not fair that I could be given an awful name because I have a preference for straight men.

I've clarified what I meant, several times. And stand by it.

"

Me too

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

QUOTE

100%

Many times the question needs to be asked. "What's more important, my relationship or my pride?"

Xx

UNQUOTE

Pride isn't important. You are misdiagnosing Dr. Peach and misnaming.

However, swallow your self worth now and it's gone for life......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

I respect everyones choices as long as it doesnt hurt anyone, if everyone was the same the world would be a boring place.

It certainly would. It takes all types to make the world go round.. Im not everyone's type and I respect that fact. But I wouldn't accuse those people of being a straight white chubby woman hater lol. Its just not fair that I could be classed as homophobic because I won't sleep with bisexual men. Jeez my brother won't either! Lol strictly gay for him lol.

You're missing the point.

It's not like saying you're not into fat people, or people with dark hair.

You're basing your decision purely based on their sexuality, which, if they are bi and not gay, makes no odds to how into you they will be.

Judging someone purely based on their sexuality is homophobic. Simple.

That's my belief. You can disagree with it of course, but I don't think I'm being unfair.

And it is possible to love gay people AND be homophobic, and even be gay AND homophobic...

I do disagree strongly. How can I love and hate something at the same time.

I ask for respect of choice. That's all. I respect that someone people are bi/gay and I'm happy they are living life to the full... and I ask that my wishes are also respected. Life would be much more simpler if we all respected each other's choices with out being accused of something.

Anyway I'm leaving this here as ive made my point.

Have A Great day"

And I ask for respect of opinion

You have a lovely day too

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch


"

100%

Many times the question needs to be asked. "What's more important, my relationship or my pride?"

Xx"

One thing I’d change there.... it’s not your pride but your self worth. If your relationship is destroying your self worth, then it’s time to cut it loose, no matter the pain, before it swallows you up for good nothing is worth losing your true self xx

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


" QUOTE

100%

Many times the question needs to be asked. "What's more important, my relationship or my pride?"

Xx

UNQUOTE

Pride isn't important. You are misdiagnosing Dr. Peach and misnaming.

However, swallow your self worth now and it's gone for life......

"

Do ya think?

See, I was thinking more that their ego may be dented, and that they'll worry what friends/family may think therefore their pride may take precedence because in their mind now their "perfect marriage" isn't so perfect so they blame and walk.

Whereas self worth to me is asking myself, is this something I personally want to work out and a road down which I want to continue. Is my love for that person more important to me than any judgememt or comments from my family and so called friends?

If the answer is yes, then bollocks to what the others may say or think, I'm worth, my relatives is worth fighting for and doing all I can as an individual and we can as a couple to get it where we want it. Or if its a situation where actually, it's not healthy, it's not good for me and I'm worth more than second guessing, being the only one self reflecting and assessing then damn right, you do what's right for you and know your worth.

Just my take on it, I could be way off

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Shortie said it's right so ...... what else is there to say

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"

100%

Many times the question needs to be asked. "What's more important, my relationship or my pride?"

Xx

One thing I’d change there.... it’s not your pride but your self worth. If your relationship is destroying your self worth, then it’s time to cut it loose, no matter the pain, before it swallows you up for good nothing is worth losing your true self xx

"

I do 100% get the self worth thing being swallowed btw, I probably held on too long in my recent clusterfuck because I was embarrassed things weren't turning out as I'd dreamed and yes, my pride was dented, especially once the whole picture became clear, but it was my self worth that meant I walked. I was nobody's mistress and certainly deserved better

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek


"Shortie said it's right so ...... what else is there to say

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being bisexual (male or female) has nothing to do with cheating, it just means that person has a wider range of potential partners to choose from while they are single.

But having chosen their partner why is the assumption that they won't be faithful to their partner anymore than if they were heterosexual? Heterosexual men will continue to like other women but it doesn't mean they have sex with them. The same for heterosexual women.

Of course, swinging and more open relationships mean that one or both of the partners will have sex with others. Who this is will depend on their sexuality. Ideally this is with the agreement of their partner. If not, that's cheating and not a sound or loving relationship in the first place.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Oh I see the old not wanting to meet a bisexual man means you're homophobic debate has arisen again - not seen one for a while.

Let me say firstly that, personally, as a bisexual man, if someone doesn't want to meet me because I am bisexual then I don't immediately think "homophobe" unless the way they express that preference is particularly vile or bigoted.

There are also plenty of valid reasons people may have that preference - not being able to give blood is one, the idea of two men having sex is another (and even though it may not be done in front of the person, for some just the idea or knowledge that a partner has had same sex sex may be as much of a turn off as witnessing it), personal past experience may be another and am sure there are others besides.

Now lets look at the definition of "homophobia" - "dislike of or prejudice against homosexual people."

Well having a preference is not necessarily expressing a "dislike of".

Now "prejudice" is a little more subjective but to define that: "preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience."

Again a preference isn't necessarily either "preconceived" or "not based on reason or actual experience" as my examples given above show.

So ultimately it comes back to *how* a preference is expressed and as such to write off anyone that holds a preference as phobic (regardless of the preference) is a sweeping generalisation at best.

I don't deny that there are those whose reasons for their preference *are* homophobic but I certainly don't think it can be applied to everyone that says they prefer not to meet bisexual men.

I'll finish how I started by saying that as a bisexual man it doesn't bother me in the slightest that people won't meet me because of my sexuality, what bothers me is when they express it in vile and bigoted terms.

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By *inamicMan
over a year ago

Blackpool

[Removed by poster at 19/08/20 13:17:53]

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea


"Oh I see the old not wanting to meet a bisexual man means you're homophobic debate has arisen again - not seen one for a while.

Let me say firstly that, personally, as a bisexual man, if someone doesn't want to meet me because I am bisexual then I don't immediately think "homophobe" unless the way they express that preference is particularly vile or bigoted.

There are also plenty of valid reasons people may have that preference - not being able to give blood is one, the idea of two men having sex is another (and even though it may not be done in front of the person, for some just the idea or knowledge that a partner has had same sex sex may be as much of a turn off as witnessing it), personal past experience may be another and am sure there are others besides.

Now lets look at the definition of "homophobia" - "dislike of or prejudice against homosexual people."

Well having a preference is not necessarily expressing a "dislike of".

Now "prejudice" is a little more subjective but to define that: "preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience."

Again a preference isn't necessarily either "preconceived" or "not based on reason or actual experience" as my examples given above show.

So ultimately it comes back to *how* a preference is expressed and as such to write off anyone that holds a preference as phobic (regardless of the preference) is a sweeping generalisation at best.

I don't deny that there are those whose reasons for their preference *are* homophobic but I certainly don't think it can be applied to everyone that says they prefer not to meet bisexual men.

I'll finish how I started by saying that as a bisexual man it doesn't bother me in the slightest that people won't meet me because of my sexuality, what bothers me is when they express it in vile and bigoted terms."
This ????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is considerable research on partner selection.

Not all reasons for rejecting bi or gay partners are homophobic.

Sometimes I don't eat my vegan sausage if the bean juice touched it

Bad analogy but it made me laugh.

There are good reasons for decisions that don't make people phobic"

Beanphobic!

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By *ickDastardlyMan
over a year ago

North East

what happened to the OP is wrong. He cheated on you. That must suck and a extra shock to find out that it was with another man.

I'm bisexual and in my opinion - and its just that an opinion - if a couple or single female don't want to have sex with me thats fine. Thats their choice. I don't think its homophobic in essence but it does depends on their reasoning I suppose.

Just because I'm bisexual it doesn't mean I'm looking for a man in every scenario and I think most people know that.

I don't like the phrase 'playing straight' because I'm not 'playing' anything. I enjoy having sex with women, couples in whatever form that takes.

It is a judgement though, for example I have regular sex with a woman who is heavily into BDSM, although when we have sex that isn't something we practice. No judgement on my part, its not something I'm into, she understands that and respects that and is still interested.

Bisexuality to me, is just the same, its another facet of my sexuality. I don't think I'll never fully understand why someone won't play with a bi man they are attracted to but I respect it. I'm not here to change peoples minds on sexuality.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them."

Sorry to brake it to you honey but you probably all ready have meet tones off bi guys who have they profile set to straight lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My husband was very straight, my partner i have now is bi. He told me early on he was and to be honest my time with my partner is far better than with a straight guy. Just because the bloke is bi it doesn't make them a different person. I discovered my dad was a crossdesser when he died. Didn't change my view of him. I still loved him as my dad. All that matters is how you love that man!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh I see the old not wanting to meet a bisexual man means you're homophobic debate has arisen again - not seen one for a while.

Let me say firstly that, personally, as a bisexual man, if someone doesn't want to meet me because I am bisexual then I don't immediately think "homophobe" unless the way they express that preference is particularly vile or bigoted.

There are also plenty of valid reasons people may have that preference - not being able to give blood is one, the idea of two men having sex is another (and even though it may not be done in front of the person, for some just the idea or knowledge that a partner has had same sex sex may be as much of a turn off as witnessing it), personal past experience may be another and am sure there are others besides.

Now lets look at the definition of "homophobia" - "dislike of or prejudice against homosexual people."

Well having a preference is not necessarily expressing a "dislike of".

Now "prejudice" is a little more subjective but to define that: "preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience."

Again a preference isn't necessarily either "preconceived" or "not based on reason or actual experience" as my examples given above show.

So ultimately it comes back to *how* a preference is expressed and as such to write off anyone that holds a preference as phobic (regardless of the preference) is a sweeping generalisation at best.

I don't deny that there are those whose reasons for their preference *are* homophobic but I certainly don't think it can be applied to everyone that says they prefer not to meet bisexual men.

I'll finish how I started by saying that as a bisexual man it doesn't bother me in the slightest that people won't meet me because of my sexuality, what bothers me is when they express it in vile and bigoted terms."

I take your point about giving blood...if that's the reason behind it...that wouldn't make you homophobic.

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By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

Well said redchair. If you want a husband or partner to be straight make sure you f*ck him every night and give him a hand job in the morning before he goes out that will probably be enough for 90% of guys and stop them seeking relief elsewhere.

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

Sorry to brake it to you honey but you probably all ready have meet tones off bi guys who have they profile set to straight lol "

Thankyou for concern but I havnt met anyone off here bar my real life friends that I don't have sex with and won't be either. I stay for the forums. The friends that I have on here that thought this would be a good place for me as i don't get much spare time to myself. But even they don't meet anyone new now due to catching someone out who was "single" so I'm pretty sure I'll be ok. Lol

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

As a bi guy , I’m surprised at the amount of straight guys who message me on here for meets or pictures , some are married men who who clearly state that they are not looking to meet other men .

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London


"

You say you you don't find bi men sexually appealing, but surely if they're only fucking you at the time, it makes no odds who they fucked in the past.

If a straight guys past fucks wouldn't 've a problem for you, why would a bi guys?

I don't find fisting or water sports sexually appealing, however learning that someone has indulged in either in the past doeant suddenly change how much I fancy them....

Is prejudiced an easier word for you to swallow? "

Thank you for challenging on this.

Just saying 'it's my preference', 'I don't find it appealing' is a cop out.

Some people just find the idea of gay male sex really unpleasant, and bi men less attractive as a result. They should just say that rather than hiding behind bland excuses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

Sorry to brake it to you honey but you probably all ready have meet tones off bi guys who have they profile set to straight lol

Thankyou for concern but I havnt met anyone off here bar my real life friends that I don't have sex with and won't be either. I stay for the forums. The friends that I have on here that thought this would be a good place for me as i don't get much spare time to myself. But even they don't meet anyone new now due to catching someone out who was "single" so I'm pretty sure I'll be ok. Lol"

Just thought I would say wasn’t take a dig or anything just kind off find it funny when woman say that but I can go though there verified list and lafe my head off because ither I meet the guys she meet before them on a older profile or they literally siting message me looking for fun and I don’t base my findings on small numbers I get 600-700 page views a day and 200 message a day and 90% off them comes from guys with straight in they profile and only looking for woman or cupples lol x

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By *_MariusMan
over a year ago

Currently Faraway

My opinion veers somewhere between that of Gemini and Turkish Delights. Are you prejudiced if the mental image of two men having sex puts you off to such an extent that you wouldn't ever touch such a man? Abso-fecking-lutely you are. When I see two women, in actual life, having sex together it doesn't make my dick actively hard but it absolutely doesn't "put me off" in any way.

However, am I losing sleep over it? No chance! I'm focusing on the people who like me for who I am.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

You say you you don't find bi men sexually appealing, but surely if they're only fucking you at the time, it makes no odds who they fucked in the past.

If a straight guys past fucks wouldn't 've a problem for you, why would a bi guys?

I don't find fisting or water sports sexually appealing, however learning that someone has indulged in either in the past doeant suddenly change how much I fancy them....

Is prejudiced an easier word for you to swallow?

Thank you for challenging on this.

Just saying 'it's my preference', 'I don't find it appealing' is a cop out.

Some people just find the idea of gay male sex really unpleasant, and bi men less attractive as a result. They should just say that rather than hiding behind bland excuses. "

A "cop out" or just a more considerate way of phrasing it than "sorry but the idea of two men engaging in sexual activity isn't something I find appealing and the thought that you have engaged in it is not one I can get past"

I know which I'd rather hear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good discussion everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"the three main digs i got off people were 1. why didnt i know? 2. did i turn him gay 3. no decent man will want me because of being married to a gay man. Nasty horrible people.

Yes people can be nasty.

Now do you understand why he felt he couldn't come out? He was probably trying to protect you both.

So it's ok to live a lie, lead someone to believe something that isn't true, for years....cos people might be mean?

Nah, sorry. I've every sympathy with those who find it hard to come out, but you don't have to include another person in that battle. "

So because someone feels something they don't share, even if they never act on it, even if the reason they don't share it is our of love for their partner who is too much of a bigot to accept it; that makes them the one in the wrong?

Wow, even for Fab's woefully disgusting attitude towards men that's a hot take.

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

Sorry to brake it to you honey but you probably all ready have meet tones off bi guys who have they profile set to straight lol

Thankyou for concern but I havnt met anyone off here bar my real life friends that I don't have sex with and won't be either. I stay for the forums. The friends that I have on here that thought this would be a good place for me as i don't get much spare time to myself. But even they don't meet anyone new now due to catching someone out who was "single" so I'm pretty sure I'll be ok. Lol

Just thought I would say wasn’t take a dig or anything just kind off find it funny when woman say that but I can go though there verified list and lafe my head off because ither I meet the guys she meet before them on a older profile or they literally siting message me looking for fun and I don’t base my findings on small numbers I get 600-700 page views a day and 200 message a day and 90% off them comes from guys with straight in they profile and only looking for woman or cupples lol x"

Lol I took it the nice way and yeah that's one if the reasons I just stay for forums. I do enjoy having a read and learned alot through them too lol. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

Sorry to brake it to you honey but you probably all ready have meet tones off bi guys who have they profile set to straight lol

Thankyou for concern but I havnt met anyone off here bar my real life friends that I don't have sex with and won't be either. I stay for the forums. The friends that I have on here that thought this would be a good place for me as i don't get much spare time to myself. But even they don't meet anyone new now due to catching someone out who was "single" so I'm pretty sure I'll be ok. Lol

Just thought I would say wasn’t take a dig or anything just kind off find it funny when woman say that but I can go though there verified list and lafe my head off because ither I meet the guys she meet before them on a older profile or they literally siting message me looking for fun and I don’t base my findings on small numbers I get 600-700 page views a day and 200 message a day and 90% off them comes from guys with straight in they profile and only looking for woman or cupples lol x

Lol I took it the nice way and yeah that's one if the reasons I just stay for forums. I do enjoy having a read and learned alot through them too lol. Xx"

That’s good just didn’t want to seem like I was getting on at you and yes you do learn a lot from the forums you learn about what really dose go on around fab xx

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By *otsolittlesecretWoman
over a year ago

prestatyn


"I wouldn't meet bi men because I dont find it sexually appealing.. but im certainly far from homophobic! My brother is gay and he would be less than pleased to hear that I maybe classed as homophobic because I don't want to sleep with a bi guy.

Why cant i have the freedom to choose who i want to have sex with without being classed as some form of phobic monster..I respect that some people are bi/gay and love the fact that they are happy....so where is the respect on my choice to not have sex with them.

Sorry to brake it to you honey but you probably all ready have meet tones off bi guys who have they profile set to straight lol

Thankyou for concern but I havnt met anyone off here bar my real life friends that I don't have sex with and won't be either. I stay for the forums. The friends that I have on here that thought this would be a good place for me as i don't get much spare time to myself. But even they don't meet anyone new now due to catching someone out who was "single" so I'm pretty sure I'll be ok. Lol

Just thought I would say wasn’t take a dig or anything just kind off find it funny when woman say that but I can go though there verified list and lafe my head off because ither I meet the guys she meet before them on a older profile or they literally siting message me looking for fun and I don’t base my findings on small numbers I get 600-700 page views a day and 200 message a day and 90% off them comes from guys with straight in they profile and only looking for woman or cupples lol x

Lol I took it the nice way and yeah that's one if the reasons I just stay for forums. I do enjoy having a read and learned alot through them too lol. Xx

That’s good just didn’t want to seem like I was getting on at you and yes you do learn a lot from the forums you learn about what really dose go on around fab xx"

It's very educational lol xxx

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"

You say you you don't find bi men sexually appealing, but surely if they're only fucking you at the time, it makes no odds who they fucked in the past.

If a straight guys past fucks wouldn't 've a problem for you, why would a bi guys?

I don't find fisting or water sports sexually appealing, however learning that someone has indulged in either in the past doeant suddenly change how much I fancy them....

Is prejudiced an easier word for you to swallow?

Thank you for challenging on this.

Just saying 'it's my preference', 'I don't find it appealing' is a cop out.

Some people just find the idea of gay male sex really unpleasant, and bi men less attractive as a result. They should just say that rather than hiding behind bland excuses. "

I've read that three times now.

It means precisely the same thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

You say you you don't find bi men sexually appealing, but surely if they're only fucking you at the time, it makes no odds who they fucked in the past.

If a straight guys past fucks wouldn't 've a problem for you, why would a bi guys?

I don't find fisting or water sports sexually appealing, however learning that someone has indulged in either in the past doeant suddenly change how much I fancy them....

Is prejudiced an easier word for you to swallow?

Thank you for challenging on this.

Just saying 'it's my preference', 'I don't find it appealing' is a cop out.

Some people just find the idea of gay male sex really unpleasant, and bi men less attractive as a result. They should just say that rather than hiding behind bland excuses.

A "cop out" or just a more considerate way of phrasing it than "sorry but the idea of two men engaging in sexual activity isn't something I find appealing and the thought that you have engaged in it is not one I can get past"

I know which I'd rather hear"

Which would you rather hear?

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

Just saying 'it's my preference', 'I don't find it appealing' is a cop out.

Some people just find the idea of gay male sex really unpleasant, and bi men less attractive as a result. They should just say that rather than hiding behind bland excuses.

A "cop out" or just a more considerate way of phrasing it than "sorry but the idea of two men engaging in sexual activity isn't something I find appealing and the thought that you have engaged in it is not one I can get past"

I know which I'd rather hear

Which would you rather hear?"

"My preference" is enough for me - doesn't need expanding or explaining further, in fact I'd even go so far as to say "my preference" isn't necessary, a polite "thanks but no thanks" is good enough and should be all that is needed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Just saying 'it's my preference', 'I don't find it appealing' is a cop out.

Some people just find the idea of gay male sex really unpleasant, and bi men less attractive as a result. They should just say that rather than hiding behind bland excuses.

A "cop out" or just a more considerate way of phrasing it than "sorry but the idea of two men engaging in sexual activity isn't something I find appealing and the thought that you have engaged in it is not one I can get past"

I know which I'd rather hear

Which would you rather hear?

"My preference" is enough for me - doesn't need expanding or explaining further, in fact I'd even go so far as to say "my preference" isn't necessary, a polite "thanks but no thanks" is good enough and should be all that is needed."

x

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By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

I have always had the feeling that Denise has never fully got over the shock of finding out her husband was gay and she is only trying to prepare her friends for the shock one day maybe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"To be honest, this would not have crossed my mind until I joined Fab.

But I think Fab tends to amplify people’s perception of sexual things. We believe that the Fab way is the everyday way of the world.

When in reality, the everyday world is still pretty much as it was, it’s just our way of looking at things has changed. "

I’ve been on and off fab long enough to realise there is just as much bigotry and as many hang ups on here as in the real world. Of course the flip side is a lot of people on here may not be true swingers, just regular folk looking for a bit of sex and bringing their prejudices with them. I think bi men are possibly the most judged and ostracised too. I don’t have a horse in this race so to speak, I’m a straight guy but perfectly comfortable with other preferences, but that’s how I see things having read forums, profiles and statuses for a long period of time. Everyone is allowed their preference but I do wince at times reading things.

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