FabSwingers.com forum: Does like attract like?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok that thread title probably doesn't make sense.. i'll explain.

Was wondering earlier do people tend to select partners based on their lifestyles and jobs?

As in have you known a lawyer to date a domestic assistant? or a Doctor to date a bin man? Obviously if the people click and get on that's the initial spark, but does a persons 'social status' effect your choice in partner?

If you were a multi millionaire who works exceptionally hard would you date someone who had never worked?

Im just putting it out there as i thought that like does attract like, so those with high earning jobs do tend to end up with someone with a similar work ethic and drive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i (like to) think i work hard so i think i'd only select a partner who worked hard too. I don't see what the job is would affect my choice.

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By *abloBackMan
over a year ago

London

I hope not, I don't want to spend the rest of my life with me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah I think we do, my partner is funny, sexy, intelligent gorgeous all round goody. Bit like me really!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

so in essence i'm asking for opinions on people who both work equally as hard (whatever the job would be)... and peoples who's incomes would roughly be the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tend to select partners who have nothing to do with work etc. Ironically this for professional reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yeah I think we do, my partner is funny, sexy, intelligent gorgeous all round goody. Bit like me really!!

like you my partner is very much like me.

short fat and hairy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"so in essence i'm asking for opinions on people who both work equally as hard (whatever the job would be)... and peoples who's incomes would roughly be the same."

work ethic = yes

type of job = no

income = no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always ask what people do for a living..but as long as we get along i don't think it really matters...dinner lady or Millionairess

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

as long as people have worked, have an intent to work or if their health allowed would work....

we would get on.

if they don't, we won't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok that thread title probably doesn't make sense.. i'll explain.

Was wondering earlier do people tend to select partners based on their lifestyles and jobs?

If you were a multi millionaire who works exceptionally hard would you date someone who had never worked?

Im just putting it out there as i thought that like does attract like, so those with high earning jobs do tend to end up with someone with a similar work ethic and drive.

"
To answer your question Sassy, which no-one else has bothered, probably yes. Of course they are exceptions, but people in work will, generally, socialise with those of a similar position. They will live in areas corresponding to their income, and again, socialise with their neighbours.

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By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago

Gosport

Although it's been awhile since I had anything resembling a relationship with anyone, when I was actively dating I had longer relationships with ladies with a broad of occupations. For me the relationships which lasted were always with people who shared a reasonable range of other interests particularly travel and the environment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

for me no i have dated guys who earn little and guys that earn lots never really cared what they earn as i pay my stuff they pay theres x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think we do tend to stick with like, they are always exceptions of course.

I would say that I would choose someone who has a similar work ethic, not a similar job, not a similar salary but the person has to share similar beliefs and ideals.

What jobs people do doesn't affect how I _iew them, their behaviour would though. I wouldn't ever partner a loud brash, alcohol drinking, swearing in every sentence who loves getting d*unk type, or befriend that type of person, because I am not like that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as long as people have worked, have an intent to work or if their health allowed would work....

we would get on.

if they don't, we won't"

Well put!!

But don't forget - as the great philosopher Paula Abdul once said - "Opposites Attract!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My OH and I have totally different occupations. He owns his own business and works very long hours, he has to deliver pitches for work and I guess has a persuasive manner and a good head for finances to be successful.

I couldn't sell a fur coat to an eskimo and work in the public sector and whilst money is important, it isn't the reason I chose this career. I do have ambition but its not money that drives me.

But we both share similar ideals and therefore I tend to get on well with people who share similar traits

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

all im happy is they have means to get to my house. dont want marry me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok that thread title probably doesn't make sense.. i'll explain.

Was wondering earlier do people tend to select partners based on their lifestyles and jobs?

If you were a multi millionaire who works exceptionally hard would you date someone who had never worked?

Im just putting it out there as i thought that like does attract like, so those with high earning jobs do tend to end up with someone with a similar work ethic and drive.

just love sexy women with accomodating assets and a warm smile....lol

couldnt care what they did for a job

is that shallow of me?????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not so much bothered by someone's status or income, as whether they can be responsible with what they've got..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as long as people have worked, have an intent to work or if their health allowed would work....

we would get on.

if they don't, we won't"

Ah the good old Protestant work ethic, rooted in Calvinism and introduced into Britain by Puritan elements within Protestantism.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"as long as people have worked, have an intent to work or if their health allowed would work....

we would get on.

if they don't, we won't

Well put!!

But don't forget - as the great philosopher Paula Abdul once said - "Opposites Attract!"

"Hard work is the refuge of somebody who has absolutely nothing better to do".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For actual 'dating' I think earning a similar amount is helpful, I wouldn't date someone who couldn't pay their way...but likewise I wouldn't date someone who I couldn't keep up with.

As for similar interests, yes that helps too, but it's goo to have stuff to do seperately as well

I also can't bare to be around negative people or people who don't give a jot about other folks or are really judgemental about people they never even met...

I think I'm easy going mostly and need the same around me or they just bring me down

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

People are attracted to each other for a whole host of conscious and subconscious reasons; at conscious level it might be about compatibility, common interests, temperament, ideas about family life, political _iews and values in life. At subconscious level it is about a compatibility that has its roots in each of the partner's childhood and life experience. In some ways, opposites attract, sometimes similar does. Relationships that are built on common values have a greater chance of survival.

In swinging... this is a bit different as we dont look for long term partners - but we may still look for similar qualities subconsciously. Just my tuppence

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the guy doesnt have a similar background and/or tastes then what have you got in common?

So for me yes it matters

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

[Removed by poster at 15/06/12 18:26:55]

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

For dating/relationship I prefer people from the same socio-economic background.

I've tried outside of that but it doesn't work and I've become resentful.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"For dating/relationship I prefer people from the same socio-economic background.

I've tried outside of that but it doesn't work and I've become resentful."

I agree with you - and it is all about being aware and honest with yourself.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If the guy doesnt have a similar background and/or tastes then what have you got in common?

So for me yes it matters"

Take meeting on this site for example, you can have plenty of things sexually in common and that's perhaps why you were drawn to each other initially. I dont ask what a man does for a living i find out as natural conversation flows. If i found out he was Prince Harry (long shot i know) i would for some reason stand off and back away from him as its a different way of living he has. - Extreme example i know

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"If the guy doesnt have a similar background and/or tastes then what have you got in common?

So for me yes it matters

Do you think that in swinging you can have an awesome chemistry with somebody perhaps because you dont know that much about them?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If i liked love a man i could not care if a bin man or what ever thay did for job ..... as long as love is there .

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"If i liked love a man i could not care if a bin man or what ever thay did for job ..... as long as love is there ."
Thats because you are a very accepting, tolerant lady - wish I could sometimes be more like that

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If the guy doesnt have a similar background and/or tastes then what have you got in common?

So for me yes it matters

Do you think that in swinging you can have an awesome chemistry with somebody perhaps because you dont know that much about them? "

sorry meant to add if i went on to date Prince Harry.. if its just NSA sex then it makes no difference to me providing there is sexual chemistry and we get on well together in a social scenario (can have a joke n laugh with)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If i liked love a man i could not care if a bin man or what ever thay did for job ..... as long as love is there ."

awwwwww Jo xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If i liked love a man i could not care if a bin man or what ever thay did for job ..... as long as love is there . Thats because you are a very accepting, tolerant lady - wish I could sometimes be more like that

"
All i know is money and things dont make you happy with out love and friendship its nothing.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

fell on my feet i me jay

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

All i know is money and things dont make you happy with out love and friendship its nothing."

No, I agree re money and material things that they dont bring happiness. For me intelligence, wit, similar interests and what I call "manliness" are important though xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So long as a partner understood that I work hard and that because I run my own business I bring work home with me. I've been out with people who are unemployed (which I found tricky being the sole bread winner) and also people earning £100K, none of them have been the right one for me; guess that just shows that money isn't the answer!

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"So long as a partner understood that I work hard and that because I run my own business I bring work home with me. I've been out with people who are unemployed (which I found tricky being the sole bread winner) and also people earning £100K, none of them have been the right one for me; guess that just shows that money isn't the answer!

Absolutely understand your point about bringing work home, I frequently do. Also agree with you on the principle of "equality" in a relationship and that money is not that important

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would hate to think a person was after me for my money and stuff and not me ........ you see them old men who are worth mils some old pop star with a wife 20/30 year younger its not love alot of the time its sad and thay must in there heart know the truth.

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By *leasureDomeMan
over a year ago

all over the place

Totally agree with you about the money,i had it lost it and got a bit of it back again,but it doesn't bring a healthy relationship.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

see for me and my past history of 'relationships' ive always been aware of his rough income and i can never relax. I hate being bought things and would hate for people to think i was with a man for his money. I know i am not, and that other people's opinions shouldn't matter but it does bother me. I'm permanently aware of my financial status/circumstances. I don't even like having a guy buy me a drink. So for me its important to be equal.

He could be the most incredible man in the world, but if i can't relax fully then it would never work long term for me.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I think values about how money should be spent are quite fundamental in a long term, sexual and loving relationship. I have seen people from very different backgrounds and socio-economic groups make very good relationships because their values were the same.

Sassy, using your extreme example of royalty William and Kate are actually very different in that regard. Yes, she grew up with money and had the advantage of education but her family are basically hard-working middle class people. But I get a sense that they share similar values in life and that is what has made it work for them. I hope they manage another 10 years together on that basis.

Meeting people on here the sexual chemistry has to be there but you only really get that when you meet (unless it's a club/party scenario). We have to navigate getting to a meet and some of the criteria you use for that other sort of relationship is likely to be applied, at some level, to arranging a meet.

The phone call is all important for me -not their job or income levels but how they communicate and whether they engage me in some way mentally.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I hate being bought things and would hate for people to think i was with a man for his money. I know i am not, I'm permanently aware of my financial status/circumstances. I don't even like having a guy buy me a drink. So for me its important to be equal.

I totally agree with this and it drives some men mad that I have these crazy rules. I am slowly learning to accept the odd drink and dinner as long as I balance it by paying for other things, or making a meal etc.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"see for me and my past history of 'relationships' ive always been aware of his rough income and i can never relax. I hate being bought things and would hate for people to think i was with a man for his money. I know i am not, and that other people's opinions shouldn't matter but it does bother me. I'm permanently aware of my financial status/circumstances. I don't even like having a guy buy me a drink. So for me its important to be equal.

He could be the most incredible man in the world, but if i can't relax fully then it would never work long term for me. "

I have no qualms about partners buying me stuff at all as I'm equally generous. When we've been abroad say and they've paid for the hotel/flights I've picked up everything else.

However, I've been resentful dating someone who lived the life of Reilly at mine but I couldn't flush the toilet at theirs as they were on a water meter. Didn't have food in just had a pub lunch everyday, but never stopped grazing at mine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok that thread title probably doesn't make sense.. i'll explain.

Was wondering earlier do people tend to select partners based on their lifestyles and jobs?

If you were a multi millionaire who works exceptionally hard would you date someone who had never worked?

Im just putting it out there as i thought that like does attract like, so those with high earning jobs do tend to end up with someone with a similar work ethic and drive.

Had a good old think about this one. I think its more of a class thing rather than a job thing. Some people could never get over the fact that someone was doing a "lesser" job than themselves (not our belief btw) regardless of the actual job.

On the flip side, there are some people who are attracted to certain professions such as uniformed roles, and this doesn't seem to apply.

We have had more than our fair share of messages from people who think by sending a pic of themselves in an army uniform is enough and don't bother compiling a proper message. Unfortunately for them the male was in the forces for a few years so its not going to hold much sway with us.

Reading this back we're not sure this is much of an answer lol x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah that would frustrate me too. For whatever reason i'm normally the one being 'less well off' compared to the guy ive dated at the time.. i hope i have never ever taken advantage of any of them as i too would feel that that's having the piss taken out of me and i was being exploited. I've seen friends being taken for a financial ride and seen the cracks its created in what was originally a loving relationship.

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Of course like for like works.

I'm looking for some twunt.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"as long as people have worked, have an intent to work or if their health allowed would work....

we would get on.

if they don't, we won't

Ah the good old Protestant work ethic, rooted in Calvinism and introduced into Britain by Puritan elements within Protestantism.

lovely.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I found this thread VERY interesting. So interesting I read it twice.

Are human beings really defined by their occupation ?

If I change my job does that make me a better or worse catch?

Horrible,shallow responses, every single one of them.

Annnnnddddddd ..... Bin men ? Why are they always sited as the LOWEST of the low ? People always say ......... Oh i'd love him even if he was a bin man' like bin men are the dregs of society.

The job may be dirty the man may have more desirable qualities than say some shifty, putrid, arsehole that hangs out on swingers sites all day.

I need my bin men more than my bankers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

myself i think Bim men do a fab job ... we have alot to thank them for i know. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dated a bin man many yrs ago...have to say couldnt give a flying......what people do for a living im not dating them.for thier job ....or thier money ive my own money thanks .Money doesnt and will never bring you health and happiness .Im an independent lady and always pay my way and always will.so to the op question......in my eyes no like for like doesnt do it for me....but we are all different be a damn boring world if we werent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ohh and btw the bin man was one sexy gawjus wonderful man....mmmmm

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I dated a bin man many yrs ago...have to say couldnt give a flying......what people do for a living im not dating them.for thier job ....or thier money ive my own money thanks .Money doesnt and will never bring you health and happiness .Im an independent lady and always pay my way and always will.so to the op question......in my eyes no like for like doesnt do it for me....but we are all different be a damn boring world if we werent

Not being funny, but if you're paying your way you wouldn't mind paying somebody elses?!! You seem to take pride in being independent so would you be happy with someone dependent on you?

Just asking for clarity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do think that people do assume sometimes unintentionally what a person is like when they have asked the " what do you do for a living ? " Question !

What I find is that when I reply hairdresser its automatically assumed minimum wage slightly dim woman who can only talk about the weather and where people are going on holidays !

I never let on that I am also a qualified toolmaker with 10 yrs experience in that and I run my own quite successful business that has nothing to do with hairdressing ! I just do that job as its a job I absolutely love and studied hard for 3 yrs to achieve the very best I could

So like for like ?? No thanks I like to explore the person not the persona that is portrayed by the job

Good post tho quite refreshing to read xx

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I found this thread VERY interesting. So interesting I read it twice.

Are human beings really defined by their occupation ?

If I change my job does that make me a better or worse catch?

Horrible,shallow responses, every single one of them.

Annnnnddddddd ..... Bin men ? Why are they always sited as the LOWEST of the low ? People always say ......... Oh i'd love him even if he was a bin man' like bin men are the dregs of society.

The job may be dirty the man may have more desirable qualities than say some shifty, putrid, arsehole that hangs out on swingers sites all day.

I need my bin men more than my bankers.

Why is it horrible and shallow?

Some people have said they wouldn't date someone "higher" than them as they couldn't keep up. Does that make them horrible and shallow too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have someone dependent on me my daughter so yes i pay for her but If i earned enough to pay for a partners share if they were struggling finacially then yes,but seeing as im only a poor single mum who works hard at my buisness and keeps my daughter and myself comfortable i pay my share.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do think that people do assume sometimes unintentionally what a person is like when they have asked the " what do you do for a living ? " Question !

What I find is that when I reply hairdresser its automatically assumed minimum wage slightly dim woman who can only talk about the weather and where people are going on holidays !

So like for like ?? No thanks I like to explore the person not the persona that is portrayed by the job

Good post tho quite refreshing to read xx "

Ohh snap i talk about the weather too...funny how we get pigeon holed for the job we do...respect to the hairdresser i say....alot of peeps would be lost without my hair skills and i remind of that constantly

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I do think that people do assume sometimes unintentionally what a person is like when they have asked the " what do you do for a living ? " Question !

What I find is that when I reply hairdresser its automatically assumed minimum wage slightly dim woman who can only talk about the weather and where people are going on holidays !

So like for like ?? No thanks I like to explore the person not the persona that is portrayed by the job

Good post tho quite refreshing to read xx "

People make assumptions about people all the time.

I remember years ago being in an adventure playground with my daughter. I got talking with one of the other mums and she mentioned she didn't get much time to bring her daughter there because of the distance to work and she got tired in the evenings. I said I was lucky as I just worked at the nearby college.

She said is love to work there it's ideal. If I give you my name and number, when you go in on Monday could you ask your cleaning manager if she could call me is there are any vacancies.

I said I didn't know who the cleaning manager was as I was a lecturer. She was so embarrassed bless her, she couldn't get away fast enough.

25 years later career change but assumptions haven't.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I have someone dependent on me my daughter so yes i pay for her but If i earned enough to pay for a partners share if they were struggling finacially then yes,but seeing as im only a poor single mum who works hard at my buisness and keeps my daughter and myself comfortable i pay my share."

Think you missed my point a bit. My daughter and her boyfriend both live with me rent free. They pay for nothing and both work full time but I've told them to save their money for a deposit. My youngest is at uni and I'm supporting her also.

If I had a partner that fell on hard times is help them too...that's not what this thread is about or what I meant.

My question is, in your situation would you date someone who didn't work who would be dependent on you ie taking food out of your daughter's mouth?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do think that people do assume sometimes unintentionally what a person is like when they have asked the " what do you do for a living ? " Question !

What I find is that when I reply hairdresser its automatically assumed minimum wage slightly dim woman who can only talk about the weather and where people are going on holidays !

So like for like ?? No thanks I like to explore the person not the persona that is portrayed by the job

Good post tho quite refreshing to read xx

I tend not to really talk about the weather these days ..... Living in wales its rain rain rain lol

I say power to everyone ! No matter what you do for work as long as it make you happy then that's good !

Saying that hairdressers are the people who are happiest in their work as recent studies have shown

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I had a partner that fell on hard times is help them too...that's not what this thread is about or what I meant.

My question is, in your situation would you date someone who didn't work who would be dependent on you ie taking food out of your daughter's mouth?"

Yes I would ! In fact when I met mr newbie 8 yrs ago I was a single parent of 2 and he was out of work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If im dating and the guy wasnt working ,yes id help him out,to a certain extent wouldnt let him bleed me.dry if thats what your implying as always my daughter comes first and the guy id be dating would know this and the men i have dated have always been considerate and caring i wouldnt be attracted to a self centered selfish man in the first place regardless whether he worked or not...i mean some guys have money and still depend on women thats not the type of man id go for.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"If im dating and the guy wasnt working ,yes id help him out,to a certain extent wouldnt let him bleed me.dry if thats what your implying as always my daughter comes first and the guy id be dating would know this and the men i have dated have always been considerate and caring i wouldnt be attracted to a self centered selfish man in the first place regardless whether he worked or not...i mean some guys have money and still depend on women thats not the type of man id go for."

Thanks for answering.

I wasn't talking partners, it's just the impression I've got from some post is they would be happy to be bled dry as long as they got a shag...or could be my cynical interpretation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good god nooooo.....a.shag aint gonna get my hard earned cash.....sod that....

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

If I had a partner that fell on hard times is help them too...that's not what this thread is about or what I meant.

My question is, in your situation would you date someone who didn't work who would be dependent on you ie taking food out of your daughter's mouth?

Yes I would ! In fact when I met mr newbie 8 yrs ago I was a single parent of 2 and he was out of work

Power to you, wouldn't do it. Can't imagine my children and I getting up to go to work while some man I picked up sat at home...but we're all different.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I said earlier in this thread that i fell on my feet with. I should of elaborated, jay is upper midle class im from working class. He chose me because he fell in love with me. Sometimes its funny and somethings show wher from different class.

When i first started seeing him and people would say "oh has he got money" they wouldnt say it if i was with someone my own age. But noone has said it for ages now

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

Annnnnddddddd ..... Bin men ? Why are they always sited as the LOWEST of the low ? People always say ......... Oh i'd love him even if he was a bin man' like bin men are the dregs of society.

Agrees

Comments like that actually really annoy me and get my back up.

But that's because my dad used to be a dustman and was for years. Am I ashamed of it, no!

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By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

I think that the reason that there are so many partnerships between people of similar status, is that it is down to the circles that they socialise in.

Doctors. lawyers etc, are probably hanging out with professional colleagues, or with their friends from uni. Life-styles & jobs probably provide the social back-ground for meeting up, then there can be a spark.

Obviously now everybody meets through Internet dating, we will have more couples who wouldn't have met face to face in the real world.

So it's not so much selection due to the job, as the job selects who you meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I had a partner that fell on hard times is help them too...that's not what this thread is about or what I meant.

My question is, in your situation would you date someone who didn't work who would be dependent on you ie taking food out of your daughter's mouth?

Yes I would ! In fact when I met mr newbie 8 yrs ago I was a single parent of 2 and he was out of work

Power to you, wouldn't do it. Can't imagine my children and I getting up to go to work while some man I picked up sat at home...but we're all different.

Firstly I would like to point out even though he was out of work he never once sponged off me and I didn't have to take food out of my kids mouths to feed him !

Also I didn't get up with the kids and leave him just dossing around in my house he stayed at his looking for work and did bits and bobs for me too if I did ask him to ( which was not often )

He was not long out of work.

He would never be the type of guy who is a kept man and let's face it the people on jeremy kyle give the unemployed a bad name not all who are out of work are the lazy Dossing round type !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Horrible,shallow responses, every single one of them.

I don't think they were, and mine certainly wasn't, it was very balanced and noted much more than just the money side of things, as did a few others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An old saying encapsulates this thread entirely:

"Birds of a feather, stick together"

It is pretty much common sense that you will get on with someone who has the same motivations, characteristics, beliefs and ambition as yourself.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I found this thread VERY interesting. So interesting I read it twice.

Are human beings really defined by their occupation ?

If I change my job does that make me a better or worse catch?

Horrible,shallow responses, every single one of them.

Annnnnddddddd ..... Bin men ? Why are they always sited as the LOWEST of the low ? People always say ......... Oh i'd love him even if he was a bin man' like bin men are the dregs of society.

The job may be dirty the man may have more desirable qualities than say some shifty, putrid, arsehole that hangs out on swingers sites all day.

I need my bin men more than my bankers.

Why is it horrible and shallow?

Some people have said they wouldn't date someone "higher" than them as they couldn't keep up. Does that make them horrible and shallow too?"

I said the responses were shallow. I didn't say the people were.

I've read it all again. Twice again. I haven't changed my stance.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Horrible,shallow responses, every single one of them.

I don't think they were, and mine certainly wasn't, it was very balanced and noted much more than just the money side of things, as did a few others."

Nah ...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just to add my next door neighbour is a binman and works amazingly hard, i was just using it as a different job title to a doctor. Never did i slate the job, but i know he has a different personality to the doctors in my local surgery, who spent 5 years training to become a doctor.

Using my neighbour again as an example, he just got the job as a bin man as he was made redundant and there was a position vacant at the time. Don't think it was his childhood dream to become one.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I meant it's used in general sassy. I wasnt' referring directly to your use of Bin Men as an example

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I meant it's used in general sassy. I wasnt' referring directly to your use of Bin Men as an example"

i understand that, and i know what you mean. after you posted i kinda felt 'ah shit it did read as another bin man slating'

it was cos he'd literally just finished work and i saw him i used his occupation as a job title x

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

If I had a partner that fell on hard times is help them too...that's not what this thread is about or what I meant.

My question is, in your situation would you date someone who didn't work who would be dependent on you ie taking food out of your daughter's mouth?

Yes I would ! In fact when I met mr newbie 8 yrs ago I was a single parent of 2 and he was out of work

Power to you, wouldn't do it. Can't imagine my children and I getting up to go to work while some man I picked up sat at home...but we're all different.

Firstly I would like to point out even though he was out of work he never once sponged off me and I didn't have to take food out of my kids mouths to feed him !

Also I didn't get up with the kids and leave him just dossing around in my house he stayed at his looking for work and did bits and bobs for me too if I did ask him to ( which was not often )

He was not long out of work.

He would never be the type of guy who is a kept man and let's face it the people on jeremy kyle give the unemployed a bad name not

all who are out of work are the lazy Dossing round type ! "

No need to be defensive, I wasn't implying your oh was sponging off you. I was merely stating I wouldn't entertain someone who wasn't working, leaving him in bed whilst my kids and I set out for work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look, in a long term relationship, for someone like me...

I dont care if the person is a housewife or legal counsel to the UN...

But I do not want lazy, slovenly...

I am who I am, which is the best that I can be...

I ask the same in a partner... So... In my case... Like does attract like...;-)

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By *exki11enWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

"as long as people have worked, have an intent to work or if their health allowed would work....

we would get on.

if they don't, we won't"

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