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Fucking seagulls!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

They're so fucking loud!

The bastards are destroying my peaceful morning.

And I'm nowhere near the sea!

As birds go...they're not my favourites.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

They are better than poxy pigeons

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Their biding their time until a virus strikes us... oh wait

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By *eeks-R-UsCouple
over a year ago

Livingston

https://youtu.be/U9t-slLl30E

This seems appropriate...

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

I live about as far as you can get from the sea in mainland England .

And theres still hundreds of the fuckers round here

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

We live right by the sea. The number of times a day I look up to the sky and curse the darn things! They stole my lunch out of my hand once, steal kids ice creams, stalk people with chips and just generally screech about. I heard someone yesterday threatening to shoot them and take the consequences

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They stole my fish & chips in Scarborough 4 years ago, I'm still mad about it

Claire

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

They poo too...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

They're such inconsiderate bastards. They've either stopped squawking or fucked off now...i may have a nap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bi carb soda seagull treat -the end

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They make me imagine I live near the sea when I dont so I sort of lile them. Noisy buggers though and they have sex on all the rooftops here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every year when I get boat out on France to fish we hook at least one ,they go for the fishing lures ,thick as fuck they are and they ffin stink,you have to throw a towel over them to get the hook out they proper food for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They make me imagine I live near the sea when I dont so I sort of lile them. Noisy buggers though and they have sex on all the rooftops here. "

Seagull voyeurism new one on me that

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine.......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am at the beach and I cant see one, you must have them all!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine......."

Ha ha my fav

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

"They're so fucking loud!

The bastards are destroying my peaceful morning.

And I'm nowhere near the sea!

As birds go...they're not my favourites."

And they shit everywhere. I went to a conference in Blackpool once and people were carrying umbrellas. There was no rain.

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By *umalotagainMan
over a year ago

a town called malice

"Bi carb soda seagull treat -the end

"

Normally 1/2 and all’s seltzer in a chip but that’s cruel

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine.......

Ha ha my fav

"

It Still makes me giggle.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"They're so fucking loud!

The bastards are destroying my peaceful morning.

And I'm nowhere near the sea!

As birds go...they're not my favourites.

And they shit everywhere. I went to a conference in Blackpool once and people were carrying umbrellas. There was no rain."

That's horrifying!

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By *ymguy1966Man
over a year ago

Port Talbot

When you work with both seagulls and pigeons you soon realise how clever these birds are

I worked at a wildlife centre so cared for these birds.

I raised a baby gull at home that had been abandoned and it was great, bonded really well

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When you work with both seagulls and pigeons you soon realise how clever these birds are

I worked at a wildlife centre so cared for these birds.

I raised a baby gull at home that had been abandoned and it was great, bonded really well

"

I'm sure they're smart as fuck!

Still annoying, inconsiderate bastards tho!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A bloody seagul one stole the jack half way through a game of boules we were playing. Swooped down, picked it up and fucked off. Bloody rude.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"I live about as far as you can get from the sea in mainland England .

And theres still hundreds of the fuckers round here

"

They'll be called Landgulls then

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

I used to work for a company that was near a golf club.

We were always having golf calls dropped on the roof.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"They make me imagine I live near the sea when I dont so I sort of lile them. Noisy buggers though and they have sex on all the rooftops here. "

When I was on holiday at Mousehole in Cornwall, the owner of the B&B where we were staying used to fire an air rifle at the roof of his mate's cottage to frighten them away, his mate did the same and they had the cleanest rooves in the village

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine.......

Ha ha my fav

It Still makes me giggle.

"

There’s one lol

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By *oozleMan
over a year ago

high wycombe

Don’t think seagulls is actually the official name, it’s just gulls and variations of species. Still bloody annoying things though, got bombed on the shoulder by one once!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My pals in Cornwall in the sticks

Remington pump

The end

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"My pals in Cornwall in the sticks

Remington pump

The end

"

An air pistol is very handy and it's quiet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only good seagull is one thats flat on the road !

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By *ymguy1966Man
over a year ago

Port Talbot

"When you work with both seagulls and pigeons you soon realise how clever these birds are

I worked at a wildlife centre so cared for these birds.

I raised a baby gull at home that had been abandoned and it was great, bonded really well

I'm sure they're smart as fuck!

Still annoying, inconsiderate bastards tho! "

Admittedly they did piss Sheila off

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By *ymguy1966Man
over a year ago

Port Talbot

Just use a good water pistol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Want to see the bastards in work down Cardiff bay. They are diving and shitting all over us. And you can't get rid of the nest because they are a protected bird.

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By *umalotagainMan
over a year ago

a town called malice

"Don’t think seagulls is actually the official name, it’s just gulls and variations of species. Still bloody annoying things though, got bombed on the shoulder by one once! "

The technical term you are looking for is “shite hawks”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My pals in Cornwall in the sticks

Remington pump

The end

An air pistol is very handy and it's quiet.

"

Doesn’t kick the same and the US version has a six cartridge load

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I bought a seagull scarer thing for the top of the boat

They perch on it

Wankers

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"I live about as far as you can get from the sea in mainland England .

And theres still hundreds of the fuckers round here

They'll be called Landgulls then

"

Yes they should

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Laser pointers really piss them off when its dark

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate to be pedantic but there is no such thing as a seagull.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rats with ffin wings !

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Target practice.

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only

Oh I like seagulls, we have one that sits on the shed & sounds like its laughing when we throw it food

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha ha we get the same!

Nowhere near the coast either

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please don’t fuck the seagulls

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Oh I like seagulls, we have one that sits on the shed & sounds like its laughing when we throw it food"

Try throwing it a brick, see if it laughs then.

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only

"Oh I like seagulls, we have one that sits on the shed & sounds like its laughing when we throw it food

Try throwing it a brick, see if it laughs then.

"

Haha no that's mean!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And there shit is like alien acid hammers paintwork !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seagulls. Stop it now......

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

[Removed by poster at 24/07/20 11:26:10]

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Oh I like seagulls, we have one that sits on the shed & sounds like its laughing when we throw it food

Try throwing it a brick, see if it laughs then.

Haha no that's mean! "

I'm a mean, horrible person.

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

"Please don’t fuck the seagulls "

This.

They are way less noisy then.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"Please don’t fuck the seagulls

This.

They are way less noisy then.

"

An oldie, but a goldie, if it don't move, paint it, if it does move, fuck it

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only

"Oh I like seagulls, we have one that sits on the shed & sounds like its laughing when we throw it food

Try throwing it a brick, see if it laughs then.

Haha no that's mean!

I'm a mean, horrible person.

"

I cant say i totally believe you there

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Oh I like seagulls, we have one that sits on the shed & sounds like its laughing when we throw it food

Try throwing it a brick, see if it laughs then.

Haha no that's mean!

I'm a mean, horrible person.

I cant say i totally believe you there

"

Smooth talker.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Love them

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By *eeks-R-UsCouple
over a year ago

Livingston

"Seagulls. Stop it now......"

Everyone told me, not to stroll on that beach...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Seagulls. Stop it now......

Everyone told me, not to stroll on that beach..."

As is seagulls are gonna come

Poke you in the coconut

And they did

They did

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seagulls. Stop it now......

Everyone told me, not to stroll on that beach..."

Seagulls gonna come, poke me in the coconut.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seagulls. Stop it now......

Everyone told me, not to stroll on that beach...

Seagulls gonna come, poke me in the coconut. "

Is that an offer

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

No seagulls here

just robins

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

"Seagulls. Stop it now......

Everyone told me, not to stroll on that beach..."

...it's stuck in my head now, fuck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate to be pedantic but there is no such thing as a seagull.

"

Mostly herring gulls though black headed gulls are common in some places. The occasional lesser black back too. The fulmar is often mistaken for a gull though it isnt - I like seeing these except when I'm midway up a sea cliff as they sail past fixing me with a beady eye and I just have to hope the damn thing isn't about to vomit on me.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"No seagulls here

just robins

"

Fucking robins!

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

"No seagulls here

just robins

Fucking robins!

"

aww I love Robins

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"No seagulls here

just robins

Fucking robins!

aww I love Robins

"

I have a big red chest if i stay out in the sun for too long.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I broke one's neck ?? it attacked my pet.

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By *eeks-R-UsCouple
over a year ago

Livingston

"Seagulls. Stop it now......

Everyone told me, not to stroll on that beach...

...it's stuck in my head now, fuck

"

Soon as I saw the thread title it was playing in my head. Just spreading the joy!

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By *usie pTV/TS
over a year ago

taunton

Couple of years ago at seaton in devon there was one flapping about badly injured lots of folks stood looking at it so I took a sledge hammer out of my van walked over and said I will take care of it thinking one good blow will end its misery bloody hell I nearly got lynched had a job to escape that car park someone put it in a box and took it away to the local vets ffs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I enjoy gulling

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Was staying in Worcester the other day and didn't sleep a wink because of the fucking incessant seagull noise. It was dreadful! We don't have them really in the wilds of Lancs/GM

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"No seagulls here

just robins

Fucking robins!

aww I love Robins

"

I'm kidding

But one time in my old house I could hear this "thunking" noise coming from the kitchen.

When I went to investigate I found an irrate male robin throwing itself against the double glazed window from the outside.

It had spotted a red saucepan on the draining board and obviously wanted to get in to marmalize this infiltrator on its patch!

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Seagulls would be more fun than the flying ants that keep bombarding ma face while I'm in town

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By *oc30Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham

One fine day - sitting at bench waiting for my train from white haven ( no idea why I fucking went there

) peacefully having some cheesy chips and was naive enough gave a chip to a innocent looking ( my ass !! I know better now ) seagull some food. I had the whole fucking flock pecking at me in minutes

:*

Never again

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By *oc30Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham

Part 2

baby sea gull got trapped in Gloucester A&E last year - we let em out - out of sympathy completely expecting it to grow up and be an absolute pain in our ass

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

"No seagulls here

just robins

Fucking robins!

aww I love Robins

I'm kidding

But one time in my old house I could hear this "thunking" noise coming from the kitchen.

When I went to investigate I found an irrate male robin throwing itself against the double glazed window from the outside.

It had spotted a red saucepan on the draining board and obviously wanted to get in to marmalize this infiltrator on its patch!"

Ohh dear yeah they can be angry little buggers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They dive bomb you in Blackpool especially if you are eating lol lol lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol were in northwales by the coast seagulls here are like the mafia been short on thrown away chips and burgers while everywhere as been on lockdown so there attacking people for food. Sat here now listening to the noisy horrible little bastards squawking

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

"https://youtu.be/U9t-slLl30E

This seems appropriate..."

I'm glad you posted that, I was too lazy to look for it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I hate to be pedantic but there is no such thing as a seagull.

Mostly herring gulls though black headed gulls are common in some places. The occasional lesser black back too. The fulmar is often mistaken for a gull though it isnt - I like seeing these except when I'm midway up a sea cliff as they sail past fixing me with a beady eye and I just have to hope the damn thing isn't about to vomit on me. "

Gulls, schmulls.... I prefer a good shag (Phalacrocorax aristotelis) any day

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan
over a year ago

Torquay

Blimey you think you've got problems, wildlife central here considering its near the middle of town. Badgers, magpies, gulls, crows,owls, bats and uncle Tom Cobbly sometimes, someone even posted about an escaped Rhino running around on the lounge thread

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By *oachman 9CoolMan
over a year ago

derby

"I live about as far as you can get from the sea in mainland England .

And theres still hundreds of the fuckers round here

"
Same most places now Inland I,m a birdwatcher so they can Interest me at times here in derbyshire you can get over or up to 12 species of gulls at any one time at certain times of the year unfortuneately being scavengers for the bigger part of the time they can often be destructive birds against others.

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

"They stole my fish & chips in Scarborough 4 years ago, I'm still mad about it

Claire "

Did that me in St Ives but just the fish and it cost a fortune 15 years ago, still miffed!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pretty sure seagulls think we are noisy, selfish, messy bastards too

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Pretty sure seagulls think we are noisy, selfish, messy bastards too

"

Oi. I'm not noisy. Am i?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Pretty sure seagulls think we are noisy, selfish, messy bastards too

"

Yep. As far as they're concerned we're in the wrong here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pretty sure seagulls think we are noisy, selfish, messy bastards too

Oi. I'm not noisy. Am i?

"

I dont imagine you are quiet CG

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Pretty sure seagulls think we are noisy, selfish, messy bastards too

Oi. I'm not noisy. Am i?

I dont imagine you are quiet CG"

Depends how many beers I've had.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bomb the bastards

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Bomb the bastards

"

I don't know you could speak 'seagull'??

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By *oachman 9CoolMan
over a year ago

derby

"I hate to be pedantic but there is no such thing as a seagull.

Mostly herring gulls though black headed gulls are common in some places. The occasional lesser black back too. The fulmar is often mistaken for a gull though it isnt - I like seeing these except when I'm midway up a sea cliff as they sail past fixing me with a beady eye and I just have to hope the damn thing isn't about to vomit on me. "
Long lived birds fulmars probabily pair for life I was lucky to get views of one in the peak district once thou they are occasionally seen Inland here their other name is fulmar petrel..

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

There's an Owl that calls to his mate at fuck off o"clock in the morning in a tree just round the corner from me

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

Seagulls do not serve a purpose, I bloody hate them.

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan
over a year ago

Torquay

"There's an Owl that calls to his mate at fuck off o"clock in the morning in a tree just round the corner from me

"

Yeah I get that, it's not his mate by the way but his rival

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan
over a year ago

Torquay

"Seagulls do not serve a purpose, I bloody hate them."

No wasps don't serve a purpose, seagulls keep our coastal resorts free from discarded chips

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By *mooth Operator 07Man
over a year ago

in the deep mist of the valleys

"Want to see the bastards in work down Cardiff bay. They are diving and shitting all over us. And you can't get rid of the nest because they are a protected bird. "

Agreed, they are an f-ing nuisance.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

I don't mind gulls. It remi ds me of the seaside although they do get a bit pesky if your eating chips..

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