FabSwingers.com forum: Your high heels are killing me.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Walk in my shoes to understand my position. A term thsts often used sometimes defensively, and other times in a more appealing manner.

I see many poster's commenting passionately around certain subjects, where clearly they have felt wronged or deeply hurt, and on first sight, its unlikely they will a different perspective regardless.

But in whos shoes would I find it hardest to walk in? Understand why they made a wrong turn or decision? Who can you simply never see their perspective?

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

DEEP blue indeed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We will never completely understand as only that individual truly has their perspective ours no matter how hard we try to “walk in their shoes” will be tainted by our own bias, perception and experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's about respecting someone else's opinion - not agreeing with it. And understanding that others have a different take on things.

We only ever know what it is like to be us. We each have had different experiences which have got us to where we are today. We can never truly know what it's like to be someone else.

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Practice and Preach as opposed to Killer and Heels!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"DEEP blue indeed. "
I agree...perhaps another coffee first !

I like to think I can see elements of most others perspective. Some people don't wish to?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"DEEP blue indeed. I agree...perhaps another coffee first !

I like to think I can see elements of most others perspective. Some people don't wish to?"

Of course there are those who don’t want to, and those that genuinely can not. However as you say we can see elements aspect but not the entirety

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would find it hard to walk in the shoes of racists/homophobics because I don't think any life path could make me see their side

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would find it hard to walk in the shoes of racists/homophobics because I don't think any life path could make me see their side"

What is interesting is listening to someone who’s trying to explain why they think the way they do, or the life story of someone who thinks a certain way...sometimes through their experiences you can see why... not agree but kinda see how they developed those opinions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"DEEP blue indeed. I agree...perhaps another coffee first !

I like to think I can see elements of most others perspective. Some people don't wish to?"

I also like to think I can see it from the other persons perspective and see all the sides. And I enjoy and appreciate if my point of view is challenged (I also like playing devil's advocate).

Why some people may get defensive, if they are not deliberately trolling, is they are having their world view challenged ('this is how I see and make sense of the world'). In some way, without realising it, you are questioning their fundamental beliefs.

COVID could be seen as a classic example. People who find the changes difficult and kick back against them - they don't want things to change. It may be disorientating and frightening for them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would find it hard to walk in the shoes of racists/homophobics because I don't think any life path could make me see their side"

I could. I've been in a few incidents where if the skin colour of the participants were reversed it would've been seen as racist. So those incidents could have easily altered my world view (and have probably made me slightly warier in certain situations).

I remember the first time I went into a gay bar (to see a gf's friend do karaoke) it freaked me out and when my gf's dad snuck up behind me and put his arm round my waist I almost hit the ceiling. It was different and disorientating and a bit scary.

Fear, anger and depression will be leading causes for some of these things.

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