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To far away

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Is it just me or don't you hate it whenever you speak to someone they always message back and say too far away in many ways they are right, if you're in Manchester and you're talking to someone who lives in in Scotland, it is a bit of a distance away it's a shame sometimes that you actually get an attraction to someone and you actually can't make your Move because of the distance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people are worth the trip

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By *ungislanderMan
over a year ago

Stornoway

I’m always to far away.

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By *obbychickWoman
over a year ago

Essex

Sometimes me saying “you’re too far away” is more of a polite way of saying there’s No.

Distance with the right person doesn’t mean anything to me.

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By *rivateparts!Man
over a year ago

Walking down the only road I've ever known!

You can make futuee plans and organize a visit.

It doesn't have to be a meet me now situation, like LVM say some are worth the wait and journey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If there very yummy id say there worth the trip...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I appear to have an attraction to ladies living in Wales...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I've always said that if I found the woman to be up my street so to speak I would make the offer but sometimes they don't want you to make the effort that's when you feel down about it

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Sometimes me saying “you’re too far away” is more of a polite way of saying there’s No.

Distance with the right person doesn’t mean anything to me. "

I'm happy to travel for the right person but usually say no if randomly messaged by somwone far away as very few want to spend the time getting to know each other that I'd want in order to commit to travelling. Travelling long distances has usually happened from getting to know each other (often through the forums) without the intention of looking for meets in the beginning but it has just evolved that way over time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Iv travelled to Ireland, 45 mins on a flight for 5 days

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By *obbychickWoman
over a year ago

Essex


"Sometimes me saying “you’re too far away” is more of a polite way of saying there’s No.

Distance with the right person doesn’t mean anything to me.

I'm happy to travel for the right person but usually say no if randomly messaged by somwone far away as very few want to spend the time getting to know each other that I'd want in order to commit to travelling. Travelling long distances has usually happened from getting to know each other (often through the forums) without the intention of looking for meets in the beginning but it has just evolved that way over time. "

Totally agree. I think along the same line as you but it’s not kept to just forum users for me.

I love it when you get that want to meet someone without initially expecting anything at the start

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By *J GeminiTV/TS
over a year ago

Northumberland

I live in North Northumberland, so I am to far from everybody,

Xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I avoid starting conversations with people I believe to be too far away. It just wouldn't work for me. I prefer local

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Distance doesn’t matter to us, we are happy to travel anywhere and we would get a weekend in a hotel as a treat!

D.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it just me or don't you hate it whenever you speak to someone they always message back and say too far away in many ways they are right, if you're in Manchester and you're talking to someone who lives in in Scotland, it is a bit of a distance away it's a shame sometimes that you actually get an attraction to someone and you actually can't make your Move because of the distance "

I don't bother messaging those I know aren't local about meeting. I only meet in one specific club and if they're too far away to do that and state that they can't travel, then I prefer not to waste their time or mine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All the time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't contact people so far away

Problem solved

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't get why people from as far as Scotland and Ireland message me never mind the ones closer to the south. Total waste of time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had hotel meets within a couple of hours drive. Like someone else mentioned. It's a polite way for some to say they're not interested

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Distance is a tough one, if you don't talk you could be missing out on an incredible connection but if you do talk you could be setting yourself up for a whole load of frustration.

But it really depends on the people involved as to whether it is worth it or not. Personally if I make a special connection with someone I'll try and make the meet happen even if it involves travel and a hotel. Eventually. As long as something like a pandemic doesn't stop it from happening.

But there are times when distance can be a polite way of saying no thanks.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Distance is the biggest cock blocker.

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Like most comments I too would travel for the right lady , could be friends for life afterwards

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish


"Is it just me or don't you hate it whenever you speak to someone they always message back and say too far away in many ways they are right, if you're in Manchester and you're talking to someone who lives in in Scotland, it is a bit of a distance away it's a shame sometimes that you actually get an attraction to someone and you actually can't make your Move because of the distance "

You could always meet half way. Scotland has great transport links.

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

For me distance is definitely a factor, apart from in a club situation, I always insist on at least one social to establish if there's a connection/attraction in person. If people travel a long distance I find they often have the expectation of it being more than just a social.

Also, from a practical point of view, I have to fit meets around child care so meeting locally is easier.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So true... seems to me that some of the Hottest are in Ireland lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Long distance is unlikely to be more than a one off adventure

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Sometimes me saying “you’re too far away” is more of a polite way of saying there’s No.

Distance with the right person doesn’t mean anything to me. "

This is true for me too

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

I’m too far away from everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m too far away from everyone "

I hear Ireland's lovely whatever time of year you're going to be home

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By *eddyBearBazMan
over a year ago

St Helens

I dont mind travelling so distance is never an issue for me. After all some are worth travelling for

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas


"I’m too far away from everyone

I hear Ireland's lovely whatever time of year you're going to be home "

It’s lovely if you don’t mind rain

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

?

I think the willingness and ability to travel is a very personal thing - a lot of people don't have the time or finances to, some just don't like travelling, some will be reluctant due to no shows in the past, some just don't want the intimacy that a longer meet entails. And, as others have said, some use it as a polite way of saying they're not interested.

Personally, I like distance meets - even if it doesn't work out I get to see a different part of the country and have a stay in a nice hotel. But I'm in the fortunate position of not having children and being able to afford the odd weekend away. I think my mindset is also helped by the fact that there are very few people local to me that I'm interested in.

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"I’m too far away from everyone

I hear Ireland's lovely whatever time of year you're going to be home

It’s lovely if you don’t mind rain "
We do get rain in England too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m too far away from everyone

I hear Ireland's lovely whatever time of year you're going to be home

It’s lovely if you don’t mind rain "

I don't mind getting wet

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

I keep getting views and fabs from a couple in Houston Texas ffs .

I've never messaged them as seems a bit dodgy to me , but it is very strange

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By *hat BlokeMan
over a year ago

Harrogate

I always try to keep my searches for ladies within a sixty mile range from my home town. It’s okay to look at all the beautiful things beyond but the reality of being able to travel much beyond that (with the time I have available), mean meetings beyond that kind of distance are not really feasible.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep getting views and fabs from a couple in Houston Texas ffs .

I've never messaged them as seems a bit dodgy to me , but it is very strange "

What's strange about it?

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales


"I keep getting views and fabs from a couple in Houston Texas ffs .

I've never messaged them as seems a bit dodgy to me , but it is very strange "

It’s not strange.

You have a fine ass. They like that fine ass.

It’s like when you window shop. You’re skint and you can’t afford to buy anything, but you still enjoying looking.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

People can always say that don't message the ones that live far away the thing with me is I don't mind travelling in my job that's all I have to do travel travel travel go up north go down south

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"I keep getting views and fabs from a couple in Houston Texas ffs .

I've never messaged them as seems a bit dodgy to me , but it is very strange

What's strange about it?"
At least once a week they view my profile , never message or wink , it's been going on for well over a year. Just strange to me

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"I keep getting views and fabs from a couple in Houston Texas ffs .

I've never messaged them as seems a bit dodgy to me , but it is very strange

It’s not strange.

You have a fine ass. They like that fine ass.

It’s like when you window shop. You’re skint and you can’t afford to buy anything, but you still enjoying looking."

Now I'm blushing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I avoid starting conversations with people I believe to be too far away. It just wouldn't work for me. I prefer local "

The same for me too. It’s about time and money.

I prefer to see the same person regularly than one offs.

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Is it just me or don't you hate it whenever you speak to someone they always message back and say too far away in many ways they are right, if you're in Manchester and you're talking to someone who lives in in Scotland, it is a bit of a distance away it's a shame sometimes that you actually get an attraction to someone and you actually can't make your Move because of the distance "

Maybe there are other reasons apart from no effort being made. I don’t travel as I’m not a confident driver with distance and I don’t like motorways or trains.

I would be appreciative of a man I had a connection with travel to my area to meet me.

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By *siancouplehantsCouple
over a year ago

K-PAX

Distance is allways a problem

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

This is a no brainier for me, I’ve got to know some lovely people who I’d love to say hello to in person, and at least one said that they would wave from the car as she drove past, but it won’t happen because of distance.

But, guess what, the alternative is not knowing them at all, and that would be far worst.

I’m glad with things as they are, a bit of longing is a good thing.

Imagine if you could only message people within 10 miles of you, I bet you wouldn’t be happy with that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're repeating yourself a bit there OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Imagine if you could only message people within 10 miles of you, I bet you wouldn’t be happy with that. "

This is terrifying

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro


"This is a no brainier for me, I’ve got to know some lovely people who I’d love to say hello to in person, and at least one said that they would wave from the car as she drove past, but it won’t happen because of distance.

But, guess what, the alternative is not knowing them at all, and that would be far worst.

I’m glad with things as they are, a bit of longing is a good thing.

Imagine if you could only message people within 10 miles of you, I bet you wouldn’t be happy with that. "

I was thinking more like the distance to walk to my car. You have pushed the boat right outside my comfort zone.

There's normally a reason why we specify local

I just don't like the pressure with meeting someone thats travelled a long way. Normally involving a sleep over.

For a first meet coffee there you have it. Short and sweet, simple really!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I avoid starting conversations with people I believe to be too far away. It just wouldn't work for me. I prefer local

The same for me too. It’s about time and money.

I prefer to see the same person regularly than one offs.

"

What they said

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

We don't mind travelling when we can, been back to Essex pretty much bi monthly for 18mnths now for one reason or another, did an overnight visit to Manchester before lockdown.

We can see the point of "pressure to play" for the single ladies but at the same time we've put people off by our "Meh, if it happens it happens" way of looking at it, we'll stay somewhere overnight have a social if it doesn't work out no problem, we are still there to have a break away from the kids etc. We will still do something in the evening & still enjoy our night/weekend away, would prefer company of another obviously but if not, so be it..

That's if you want one offs or infrequent meets though, Needs to be localish for a regular fwb, we tried a distance one & it was a nightmare with work schedules, babysitter availability for both sides etc. Did manage to meet three times though, so not bad for someone 200 odd miles away.

Geography plays a large part too, If we said "Within ten miles only", we'd be fucking sheep!" So for us "Local" is anyone within 50-60miles,

I mean, we have to do 25 miles to go anywhere decent for shopping, so a meet, even a social must be worth a bit more than that

x

S&H

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

OP I have a habit of repeating myself but hopefully people understand what I am saying totally understand if some doll a lot of the time I don't make any sense it just would be nice to actually drive up or drive down to see that person don't get me wrong 4 hours is a little bit of a distance and if they actually put it to 10 miles there is not many people from Manchester area that are interested in me

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By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish


"I've always said that if I found the woman to be up my street so to speak I would make the offer but sometimes they don't want you to make the effort that's when you feel down about it"

For some the attraction is cos you are so far away. They have no intention to meet, so will chat away. If you are happy with that great. If you are after real meets then the distance issue can be overcome.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I've always said that if I found the woman to be up my street so to speak I would make the offer but sometimes they don't want you to make the effort that's when you feel down about it

For some the attraction is cos you are so far away. They have no intention to meet, so will chat away. If you are happy with that great. If you are after real meets then the distance issue can be overcome."

And I get that I completely understand I know that there is always an attraction there to some people and the distance can be a bit of an issue but a lot of the time these days as well it's women that I don't match their criteria with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm bloody miles away anyway, so I don't bother asking folks, its more complimentary only

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Distance isn't measured in miles. Its measured in the level of interest in another...

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Distance isn't measured in miles. Its measured in the level of interest in another..."

Ooo I like this

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

The thing is OP, while you may have an attraction to someone's profile and pics, you can't truly *know* you have an attraction to them without some level of interaction beyond that - and then of course you have the fact that just because you find an attraction to them enough to want to contact them, it doesn't automatically mean the attraction will be there in reverse.

So as others have said, distance can be used as a way of saying no without having to explain.

I personally prefer to meet people I've formed a connection and chemistry with so distance isn't an issue for me, and I use the forums and messages as a means of getting to know people first before even considering suggesting meeting - if you're contacting people "blind" based on just their profile and pics I can understand why people might be reluctant to interact if there is distance involved, if they have people closer that interest them.

There's no point in getting down about it - perhaps if you're finding it's not working the way you are approaching the site, consider other ways of approaching it (such as getting involved in the forums or chat rooms) as a means to get to know people even those from farther afield who may be willing to travel once they know you a little better.

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

Most people are too far away. The others are too close.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some people are worth the trip"

This

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By *abasaurus RexMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Personally I think it’s a cop out. Most people will travel for hours and hours for the right person

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have and will travel very far if I want to meet that person

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

there is that!

lol

x

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

o/p just message someone closer to you!

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Personally I think it’s a cop out. Most people will travel for hours and hours for the right person "

The key part of that being "for the right person"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personally I think it’s a cop out. Most people will travel for hours and hours for the right person

The key part of that being "for the right person" "

I think you'd have to be pretty confident with the person and about how you'll get on to travel far. By chasing round the country you can miss the gem just on your doorstep ...

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By *abasaurus RexMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire


"Personally I think it’s a cop out. Most people will travel for hours and hours for the right person

The key part of that being "for the right person" "

Well... yeah.....

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By *ire_thornMan
over a year ago

no comment

Doesnt bother me at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the dialogue is great & open - distance isn’t really an issue to a certain extent

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm moving to Scotland to be with someone. She's a swinger too and we're going to take things easy/slow at the start and nothing will change other than we will be nearer each other to confide in and date...

Some people think it's a mad idea to be moving hundreds of miles to try and make a relationship work, but we have a strong attraction to each other and I have no ties in the South so why the hell not?

I think she's worth it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just find it a bit mind boggling when someone is willing to travel to meet me... But I don't really consider myself to be anything special. There are far better looking women on here.

I've had someone willing to travel from Ireland and someone from Brighton.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think if there's a connection there and it's not that far away anyone would make that effort

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Personally I think it’s a cop out. Most people will travel for hours and hours for the right person

The key part of that being "for the right person"

I think you'd have to be pretty confident with the person and about how you'll get on to travel far. By chasing round the country you can miss the gem just on your doorstep ... "

I've travelled up to three hours both ways to meet people and have had some great times, but I usually spend time getting to know people a little before arranging to meet them so generally have a good idea that we'll get on.

I'd be open to meeting people more locally, but the approach I use doesn't necessarily lend itself to connecting with/meeting them.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

For first time socials I tend to arrange to meet long distance friends at a fab social weekend away, you can get on online and have a really good connection, but still meet and the chemistry is just not there.

For the right person distance will never be an issue for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's the generic excuse I always use. Better than saying I don't fancy them.

If they keep wittering to meet I just know they are desperate and also can't take "no" for an answer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm moving to Scotland to be with someone. She's a swinger too and we're going to take things easy/slow at the start and nothing will change other than we will be nearer each other to confide in and date...

Some people think it's a mad idea to be moving hundreds of miles to try and make a relationship work, but we have a strong attraction to each other and I have no ties in the South so why the hell not?

I think she's worth it! "

Aww that’s really lovely. All the best to both of you

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