FabSwingers.com forum: I’m sorry this profile is unavailable right now. Please leave a message and I’ll get back to you

By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Join the thread to turn your answer machine on and see if anybody leaves a message for you.

Answer messages in the thread or privately

Maybe leave an answer machine message or two in the thread.

Remember it’s just a bit of fun. Play nice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will get back to you as soon as possible. Perhaps tomorrow. Or next week. Maybe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kissing Kelly isnt here right now ,shes off perving another thread.please leave a message after a grope,thank you x

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By *llaboutthewifeCouple
over a year ago

Cardiff

I have a habit of listening to messages and meaning to reply but completely forgetting

Jo x

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

We are not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you! ...

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

"The message answering service for this account has been switched off due to a lack of use"

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"We are not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you! ...

D."

Hi D, fiddles here, I’ve just noticed that Jo has left a pair of knickers round mine, should I pop them through your letterbox or sell them on eBay like last time.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"I have a habit of listening to messages and meaning to reply but completely forgetting

Jo x"

Hi Fiddles here, you’re not answering but I can see you’re in through the gap in your curtains. Ooh you’re looking good.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Kissing Kelly isnt here right now ,shes off perving another thread.please leave a message after a grope,thank you x"

Morning Kelly, just wondering if you’ll be in at half 10 for that grope.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Attention all planets of the Solar Federation. We have assumed control.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Attention all planets of the Solar Federation. We have assumed control."

I knew I should have paid the phone bill.

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By *ljamMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Hey how are ya doin

Sorry you can't get through

Why don't you leave your name and your number

And I'll get back to you

Bonus points if you can name the track and group...

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hey how are ya doin

Sorry you can't get through

Why don't you leave your name and your number

And I'll get back to you

Bonus points if you can name the track and group..."

It’s something to do with stars but it’s bugging me which song it is.

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"We are not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you! ...

Hi D, fiddles here, I’ve just noticed that Jo has left a pair of knickers round mine, should I pop them through your letterbox or sell them on eBay like last time. "

Bang em on eBay like last time Fiddles, they will be filthy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Skydrol is not around anymore

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is my basic profile message already. Doesnt appear to work!

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"We are not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you! ...

Hi D, fiddles here, I’ve just noticed that Jo has left a pair of knickers round mine, should I pop them through your letterbox or sell them on eBay like last time.

Bang em on eBay like last time Fiddles, they will be filthy

D."

They are now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Supersonic Simon James is always available well only for the next two weeks

so make sure you get in touch or face the consequences. PS I don't know what the consequences will be

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"This is my basic profile message already. Doesnt appear to work!

Hi testarossa, I tried calling but your box was full and I couldn’t get in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey how are ya doin

Sorry you can't get through

Why don't you leave your name and your number

And I'll get back to you

Bonus points if you can name the track and group..."

De La Soul, too easy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is my basic profile message already. Doesnt appear to work!

Hi testarossa, I tried calling but your box was full and I couldn’t get in.

If only!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi, you’ve reached The Wild Ones.

If you are calling in behalf of Jabba, we already sent the money. If you are our parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you didn't lend us enough money. If you are our friends, you owe me money.

The Wild Ones are unable to take your call right now but if you leave a message we’ll be in touch upon our return.

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By *ljamMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

"Hey how are ya doin

Sorry you can't get through

Why don't you leave your name and your number

And I'll get back to you

Bonus points if you can name the track and group...

De La Soul, too easy!"

Ring ring ring we have a winner

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hi, you’ve reached The Wild Ones.

The Wild Ones are unable to take your call right now but if you leave a message we’ll be in touch upon our return."

Hi Wild ones. I was just calling to see if you had that tenner I lent you last night. I’m surprised that you can get life saving surgery for a tenner to be honest.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hey how are ya doin

Sorry you can't get through

Why don't you leave your name and your number

And I'll get back to you

Bonus points if you can name the track and group...

De La Soul, too easy!

Ring ring ring we have a winner

Damn I was thinking of De Barge clouds across the moon.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh but I always play nice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Kissing Kelly isnt here right now ,shes off perving another thread.please leave a message after a grope,thank you x

Morning Kelly, just wondering if you’ll be in at half 10 for that grope.

"
make it 11 and i will see what i can do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're through to heat, I have a massive aversion to listening to voice mails, so I'd just try again later if I were you! Mwah.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Kissing Kelly isnt here right now ,shes off perving another thread.please leave a message after a grope,thank you x

Morning Kelly, just wondering if you’ll be in at half 10 for that grope.

make it 11 and i will see what i can do

Hi Kelly. Fantastic, I’ll bring the cake.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Oh but I always play nice

Hi Indigo, just thought I’d drop you a message to say what lovely boi a you have.

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By *ribsaMan
over a year ago

A box at end of your bed

Tribsa is unavailable for now please leave a message and he will get back to you asap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey, how you doin'?

I'm sorry you couldn't get through

'Cause this is a message that's been recorded

Especially for you

And if you leave a name and your number

We'll get right back to you

You can leave a message now if you want to

When the bleeps are through.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sorry but Estra-gone. Please try again later.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi Leighcock, isn’t here right now leave your name and I’ll get back to you. Alternatively try and contact me on another messaging platform to break the monotony of all these zoom calls for me.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hey, how you doin'?

I'm sorry you couldn't get through

'Cause this is a message that's been recorded

Especially for you

And if you leave a name and your number

We'll get right back to you

You can leave a message now if you want to

When the bleeps are through."

Morning tried to call but some bloody poet has hijacked your answer machine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hey how are ya doin

Sorry you can't get through

Why don't you leave your name and your number

And I'll get back to you

Bonus points if you can name the track and group...

De La Soul, too easy!

Ring ring ring we have a winner

I was thinking curiosity killed the cat

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Hi! DC here

You’re at the bottom of my handbag right now and even with a good rummaging feel, Finger tip search says ‘ nothing hard’ ...I’ll back you to when Im finished! Please leave me a message x

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By *uge G RectionMan
over a year ago

where I like to be... down south

Bad boy's busy being the best at being bad right now, so leave a message and he might get back to you

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hi! DC here

You’re at the bottom of my handbag right now and even with a good rummaging feel, Finger tip search says ‘ nothing hard’ ...I’ll back you to when Im finished! Please leave me a message x "

Hi DC fiddles here sorry I missed you, just ringing to say if you put your phone on vibrate pop it in your knickers and I’ll call you back.

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Randy_tom isn't here right now , im sitting on the shed waiting to go out on the prowl,

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Thanks for calling, NSP is a little tied up at the moment but leave a message and I'll be sure to get back to you as soon as I'm free. Well, maybe not as soon as, I'll probably have to clean up a little. But definitely within a week or so.

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"Hi! DC here

You’re at the bottom of my handbag right now and even with a good rummaging feel, Finger tip search says ‘ nothing hard’ ...I’ll back you to when Im finished! Please leave me a message x

Hi DC fiddles here sorry I missed you, just ringing to say if you put your phone on vibrate pop it in your knickers and I’ll call you back.

Lmfao!!! Ace answer!

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Thanks for calling, NSP is a little tied up at the moment but leave a message and I'll be sure to get back to you as soon as I'm free. Well, maybe not as soon as, I'll probably have to clean up a little. But definitely within a week or so. "

Hi NSP, fiddles calling, wondered if you’d like me to pop round and help with the ropes. I’m good at undoing knots, equally good at tying them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Hi NSP, fiddles calling, wondered if you’d like me to pop round and help with the ropes. I’m good at undoing knots, equally good at tying them.

Given you're the one who got me in this state in the first place, I'd say yes please

Need to record a new message....

Hi, thanks for calling NSP. Can't come to the phone for a week or so, as Fiddles has me tied up again and all of a dither. And I'm not sorry. Leave a message

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

Hi Hippy, it's NSP. Need a hand? I have two

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By *hermodogMan
over a year ago

Melbourne

Sorry, you've reached thermo, can't answer the phone right now. Mainly due to the need to peruse through profiles to fab all these lovely people. Leave a kind message and maybe I'll do it you too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is an automated response service pls don’t leave a message we are currently shagging

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

Hi Hippy, Fiddles here, I was wondering if you fancied a shag to be honest. Anyway get back to me if you’re not busy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You’ve reached Incan, tell me your needs and I’ll get back to you if I can help...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, it's NSP. Need a hand? I have two

I’ll just undo those ropes for you first

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, Fiddles here, I was wondering if you fancied a shag to be honest. Anyway get back to me if you’re not busy.

Fiddles, hippy here, I’m on my way

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"You’ve reached Incan, tell me your needs and I’ll get back to you if I can help..."

Hi Incan, Fiddles calling, I’m looking for a lovely clever funny lady who has a great arse and a lovely knickers collection. Any ideas?

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, it's NSP. Need a hand? I have two

I’ll just undo those ropes for you first

I don't know, maybe leave them on for a little bit

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, Fiddles here, I was wondering if you fancied a shag to be honest. Anyway get back to me if you’re not busy.

Fiddles, hippy here, I’m on my way

Fiddles here, I’m upstairs, there’s a key under the plant pot on the porch, but don’t tell anybody.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, Fiddles here, I was wondering if you fancied a shag to be honest. Anyway get back to me if you’re not busy.

Fiddles, hippy here, I’m on my way

Fiddles here, I’m upstairs, there’s a key under the plant pot on the porch, but don’t tell anybody. "

(sneaks to the plant pot on the porch and lets herself in leaving the door open for Hippy)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, Fiddles here, I was wondering if you fancied a shag to be honest. Anyway get back to me if you’re not busy.

Fiddles, hippy here, I’m on my way

Fiddles here, I’m upstairs, there’s a key under the plant pot on the porch, but don’t tell anybody.

(sneaks to the plant pot on the porch and lets herself in leaving the door open for Hippy)

Ooh

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, Fiddles here, I was wondering if you fancied a shag to be honest. Anyway get back to me if you’re not busy.

Fiddles, hippy here, I’m on my way

Fiddles here, I’m upstairs, there’s a key under the plant pot on the porch, but don’t tell anybody.

(sneaks to the plant pot on the porch and lets herself in leaving the door open for Hippy)

Ooh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi Candyman here, I can’t reach the phone right now ..... mmmmm that feels good.......... but if you’d like to......ooooh god yeh ...... leave a message, I’ll get .......... oh got baby right there, just lick it............back to you as soon as I come............ [ass slapping sounds] ......... beeeeeeeppp

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm sorry but Estra-gone. Please try again later. "

Estragon, Godot here. Where are you I've been waiting forever.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hippy chick can’t come to the phone right now, she’s got her tits out again

, and is taking yet more photos

(Do I have a problem

)

Hi Hippy, Fiddles here, I was wondering if you fancied a shag to be honest. Anyway get back to me if you’re not busy.

Fiddles, hippy here, I’m on my way

Fiddles here, I’m upstairs, there’s a key under the plant pot on the porch, but don’t tell anybody.

(sneaks to the plant pot on the porch and lets herself in leaving the door open for Hippy)

Ooh

Very ooh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please leave a message. I like trying new things.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Hello NSP I’m doing a special art class later, I wonder if you’d be available to help out.

Anyway catch you in a bit.

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By *oneyjule65Couple
over a year ago

Halifax

Eye up..Honeyjule65 is a bit tied up at the moment..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cheeky is unavailable right now, please leave your message after the beep....beeeeeeeeeeeep

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hello NSP I’m doing a special art class later, I wonder if you’d be available to help out.

Anyway catch you in a bit. "

Always willing to help out in the arts Fiddles..... Will there be many taking part?

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Cheeky is unavailable right now, please leave your message after the beep....beeeeeeeeeeeep

Hi Cheeky, Fiddles here, I’ll be out later taking Nan to get a new paisley patterned velour bag for her anal beads.

Fancy a brew whilst she gets them out to try the bag for size.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Eye up..Honeyjule65 is a bit tied up at the moment.."

Hi message for Joules. The local motor boat club are wondering if you could be guest speaker at their annual awards night.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hello NSP I’m doing a special art class later, I wonder if you’d be available to help out.

Anyway catch you in a bit.

Always willing to help out in the arts Fiddles..... Will there be many taking part? "

Just getting back to NSP there’s a list of interested parties if that’s acceptable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you for calling oreo towers. Unfortunately mr oreo is unavailable at the current time hes either asleep or daydreaming.

Please leave your message after the tone.

If you are calling regarding the cake incident, it was like that when he found it.

Have a great day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheeky is unavailable right now, please leave your message after the beep....beeeeeeeeeeeep

Hi Cheeky, Fiddles here, I’ll be out later taking Nan to get a new paisley patterned velour bag for her anal beads.

Fancy a brew whilst she gets them out to try the bag for size.

Sounds lovely Fiddles but I’m not sure about the beads

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Cheeky is unavailable right now, please leave your message after the beep....beeeeeeeeeeeep

Message for cheeky.

I want to bite your bum.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hello NSP I’m doing a special art class later, I wonder if you’d be available to help out.

Anyway catch you in a bit.

Always willing to help out in the arts Fiddles..... Will there be many taking part?

Just getting back to NSP there’s a list of interested parties if that’s acceptable. "

I'll trust you to come up with the short list. But you know who has to definitely be on it

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Thank you for calling oreo towers. Unfortunately mr oreo is unavailable at the current time hes either asleep or daydreaming.

Please leave your message after the tone.

If you are calling regarding the cake incident, it was like that when he found it.

Have a great day "

Oreo, NSP here. I knocked and knocked but you didn't answer. Could hear some strange sounds coming from upstairs though so I assume you had cake. Gimme a call back and we shall reschedule

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sparkles in unavailable right now as she should be working but she's probably perving somewhere, she'll get back to you when she retrieves her mind out of the gutter

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Sparkles in unavailable right now as she should be working but she's probably perving somewhere, she'll get back to you when she retrieves her mind out of the gutter

Sparkles, honey, meeting of minds scheduled later today. I'll be in the gutter. Come find me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got your message, missed you again. Will find you in the gutter

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Sparkles in unavailable right now as she should be working but she's probably perving somewhere, she'll get back to you when she retrieves her mind out of the gutter

Hi Sparkles it’s fiddles. I was hoping to catch you in but just wanted to say how much I like sparkley you. Oh and great boobs too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cheeky is unavailable right now, please leave your message after the beep....beeeeeeeeeeeep

Message for cheeky.

I want to bite your bum.

Go on then

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"We are not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you! ...

D."

D, NSP here. I've been calling and calling but your voicemail has been full. Get back to me ASAP would you? Ranch needs tending. Thanks.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

Sparkle1974 is unavailable right now... she's off in search of a big spoon x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Sparkle1974 is unavailable right now... she's off in search of a big spoon x"

Hi this is Fiddles, I’ve got a big spoon delivery for a Sparkle1974.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

HC ( i am rubbish at remembering this)

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

I think that could be for the best you know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unfortunately I am not in right now. If you leave your details for a meet then perhaps I will be."

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

I think that could be for the best you know.

I think maybe you could both be right. Think he could handle the three of us though?

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

I think that could be for the best you know.

I think maybe you could both be right. Think he could handle the three of us though?

Hi Fiddles calling. Sorry for the cold call but I wondered if you knew about my three for the price of 1 offer on tending to lady gardens.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

I think that could be for the best you know.

I think maybe you could both be right. Think he could handle the three of us though?

Hi Fiddles calling. Sorry for the cold call but I wondered if you knew about my three for the price of 1 offer on tending to lady gardens. "

Wait, we have to pay you. I didn’t realise it was that kind of service

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry

This mailbox is full, Please try again at a later time

Yeah Right!

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

I think that could be for the best you know.

I think maybe you could both be right. Think he could handle the three of us though?

Hi Fiddles calling. Sorry for the cold call but I wondered if you knew about my three for the price of 1 offer on tending to lady gardens.

Wait, we have to pay you. I didn’t realise it was that kind of service

I'm negotiating a payment in kind situation....

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Hi you’ve got Fiddles sorry I’m not available leave a message and I’ll get back to you.

If it’s about the lady garden tending service I’ll get to you as soon as I can.

No lawn too short or too long.

Fiddles. Need to be untied. I have a meeting with Sparkles in the gutter I've got to get to

Maybe we need to retrieve sparkles from the gutter and take her to fiddles

I think that could be for the best you know.

I think maybe you could both be right. Think he could handle the three of us though?

Hi Fiddles calling. Sorry for the cold call but I wondered if you knew about my three for the price of 1 offer on tending to lady gardens.

Wait, we have to pay you. I didn’t realise it was that kind of service

I'm negotiating a payment in kind situation....

No it’s for booking in the jobs purposes only. Relax and lie down ladies and I’ll do all the work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sparkle1974 is unavailable right now... she's off in search of a big spoon x"

Hi sparkleypops, oreo here. Sorry I missed you I've left a life size cardboard cut out of myself with the neighbour. In the pose of a spoon. Hope this helps. K bye

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Sorry

This mailbox is full, Please try again at a later time

Yeah Right!"

Wonko,wonko called you back but there’s no answer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fiddles, Snowdrop here, I’ve sharpened your scissors and oiled the clippers and they’re ready for collection, about the new strimmer you ordered, it’s out of stock so I’ve sent a replacement, the Bushwacker 2000, hope it helps.

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Fiddles, Snowdrop here, I’ve sharpened your scissors and oiled the clippers and they’re ready for collection, about the new strimmer you ordered, it’s out of stock so I’ve sent a replacement, the Bushwacker 2000, hope it helps. "

Snowdrop thanks for getting back to me. 5*reviews for service.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

You're through to Anabelle. Sorry, I'm a bit a bit tied up at the moment, leave your name and digits and I'll get back to you.....eventually!

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"You're through to Anabelle. Sorry, I'm a bit a bit tied up at the moment, leave your name and digits and I'll get back to you.....eventually! "

Hi Anabelle sorry I’ve been peeking through your curtains so much, the police have told me that’s it wrong. But then they haven’t seen your bum. Anyway just wanted to clear that up.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

Sorry can't reply right now.... I'm playing in my bubbles

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Sorry can't reply right now.... I'm playing in my bubbles

Sparkle, NSP here. There appear to be too many bubbles in your bath. It's a safety hazard. Suggest you get rinsed off a little. I'll be happy to check when you're done.

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By *ncemoreroundthesunCouple
over a year ago

on the move

"thanks for your call, unfortunately we're out looking at shiny things or photographing fairies, please leave your message after the x+1 seconds..."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry

This mailbox is full, Please try again at a later time

Yeah Right!

Wonko,wonko called you back but there’s no answer. "

Sorry i cant remember my pass code to log in and retrieve it

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Skydrol is not around anymore "

Skydrol, NSP. Your presence is required. Forthwith.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Sorry can't reply right now.... I'm playing in my bubbles

Sparkle, NSP here. There appear to be too many bubbles in your bath. It's a safety hazard. Suggest you get rinsed off a little. I'll be happy to check when you're done. "

Ready for inspection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't come to the phone right now, as need a shower, having edged myself for the last 2 hours.. Beep..

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By *oneyjule65Couple
over a year ago

Halifax

"Eye up..Honeyjule65 is a bit tied up at the moment..

Hi message for Joules. The local motor boat club are wondering if you could be guest speaker at their annual awards night.

Ooh

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"Sorry can't reply right now.... I'm playing in my bubbles

Sparkle, NSP here. There appear to be too many bubbles in your bath. It's a safety hazard. Suggest you get rinsed off a little. I'll be happy to check when you're done.

Ready for inspection

I'm on my way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sorry, Lorenzo can't get to the phone right now. He's off on an adventure. If you leave a message at the tone, he'll be sure to get back to you within three to six months.

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By *J GeminiTV/TS
over a year ago

Northumberland

Sorry I can't get to the phone right now as I'm licking a rather large lolly!

Please leave a message and I'll cum right back to you

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm sorry, Lorenzo can't get to the phone right now. He's off on an adventure. If you leave a message at the tone, he'll be sure to get back to you within three to six months."

Lorenzo, no. You can't leave us hanging that long. You're meant to be joining Sparkles, Hippy and I in the gutter

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By *ert n BerylCouple
over a year ago

middlesbrough

Hi you’re through to Beryl n Bert. Sorry we can’t answer your call at the minute but Beryl doesn’t speak with her mouth full and I’m enjoying this bj too much to move! If you fancy joining us leave your name and number and we’ll perve your pics and get back to you! Mwahhh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm sorry, Lorenzo can't get to the phone right now. He's off on an adventure. If you leave a message at the tone, he'll be sure to get back to you within three to six months.

Lorenzo, no. You can't leave us hanging that long. You're meant to be joining Sparkles, Hippy and I in the gutter

Oh I don't know, it seems pretty crowded down there already. Maybe just a peek

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I'm sorry, Lorenzo can't get to the phone right now. He's off on an adventure. If you leave a message at the tone, he'll be sure to get back to you within three to six months.

Lorenzo, no. You can't leave us hanging that long. You're meant to be joining Sparkles, Hippy and I in the gutter

Oh I don't know, it seems pretty crowded down there already. Maybe just a peek

It is crowded. Get in close

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi this is the candyman, I’ve already come on my phone and now can’t pick it up to answer as it’s far too slippery ..........beep

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Hi you’re through to Fiddles. Congratulations some of the best psychotherapists in the land haven’t been able to get through to me.

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By *ulahlollipopWoman
over a year ago

Reading/London

Thanks for calling, I’m off dancing naked in the garden right now. Please leave a message after the rainbow

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By *iddlesticks OP Man
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Thanks for calling, I’m off dancing naked in the garden right now. Please leave a message after the rainbow

Hi love, delivery for you, I’ll drop it off in the garden.

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