FabSwingers.com forum: The Quality of cock has gone downhill

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?"

Have you checked for the barcode on the underside?

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By *imon_hydeMan
over a year ago

Stockport

Regular servicing and the application of linseed oil after every use?

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

Maybe she was going to cook it a coq au vin

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?

Have you checked for the barcode on the underside? "

Its hidden under the reduced sticker

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Regular servicing and the application of linseed oil after every use?"

:-Linseed oil

I need to see evidence of side effects

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Maybe she was going to cook it a coq au vin

Better than cocky leaky soup?

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only

For me the 'quality' of the cock is who the cock is attached to.

Unless she's basing the 'quality' on a shag rating

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

It sounds like she's looking to buy an appliance.

Direct her to Love Honey?

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

Can it be washed in the washing machine

if not it’s usually high quality and needs hand washing

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By *hropsGuy69Man
over a year ago

telford

"Can it be washed in the washing machine

if not it’s usually high quality and needs hand washing

Ha ha brilliant

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Test the temperature?

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

"Maybe she was going to cook it a coq au vin

Better than cocky leaky soup? "

Not sure depends how leaky the cock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have you checked for the barcode on the underside?

Its hidden under the reduced sticker

Hahahaha love it

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By *ig_eric_tionMan
over a year ago

IPSWICH

"Regular servicing and the application of linseed oil after every use?

:-Linseed oil

I need to see evidence of side effects "

It makes the wood more resilient when you're bashing your balls about.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Maybe she was going to cook it a coq au vin

Better than cocky leaky soup?

Not sure depends how leaky the cock

This sounds like balls need draining. Something for a doctor.

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?"

I use glory holes as a go/no go gauge.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Regular servicing and the application of linseed oil after every use?"

Is your cock a cricket bat?

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By *zoreanMan
over a year ago

Witney

I inspect it daily to make sure that it's running and all fluids are flowing.

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By *elshcouple18Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

I rest mine on occasion, so when called into action, it's fighting fit and raring to go..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's what happens when its caged and hasnt roamed its entire life getting the odd tinder snack here and there... shes looking for that fresh red tractor farm assured grass fed free range cock... only the best

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

I feel a cock-working-out rocky-style montage coming on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you sure she wasn't talking about chickens?

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

Hmnn does she think it expired or went off during the lockdown. OP send her a message to let her know her claims are being discussed in the lounge.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read the label to see where and how it was made

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha ha ‘best before..’

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By *elshcouple18Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Read the label to see where and how it was made

"
maybe you can rate them all for us

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

She's not wrong, it's been a terrible season for us cockfarmers.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"She's not wrong, it's been a terrible season for us cockfarmers.

Have you tried watering them?

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

If those mattress adverts are anything to go by, I think you need to pummel it like a punchbag then roll a rolling pin over it.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"If those mattress adverts are anything to go by, I think you need to pummel it like a punchbag then roll a rolling pin over it. "

Kinky

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

"She's not wrong, it's been a terrible season for us cockfarmers.

Have you tried watering them?"

Water doesn't work on these crops, you need other stimulants like saliva or Mountain Dew, or whatever I am claiming squirt to be this week...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"She's not wrong, it's been a terrible season for us cockfarmers.

Have you tried watering them?

Water doesn't work on these crops, you need other stimulants like saliva or Mountain Dew, or whatever I am claiming squirt to be this week..."

Mountain Dew

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Read the label to see where and how it was made

maybe you can rate them all for us

I’ll do that on “ Willy out Wednesday “

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

You could ask Jasmine for a girth assessment. I don't know if she would do it though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?

Have you checked for the barcode on the underside?

Its hidden under the reduced sticker

Well then it’s clearly out of date

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?

Have you checked for the barcode on the underside?

Its hidden under the reduced sticker

Well then it’s clearly out of date

I did wonder why it tasted funny

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

It needs a CE code stamped on it...

...stands for Cock Exemplary I believe

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Cocks not like it used to be

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?

Have you checked for the barcode on the underside?

Its hidden under the reduced sticker

Well then it’s clearly out of date

Best to toss then.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

‘Cock isn’t what it used to be in my day‘

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon

I think she was using the term ‘cock’ to describe men in general. In the same way that some men refer to women as ‘pussy’.

Looking at some male profiles on here and I feel she is right. Standard is very poor, a real scruffy pathetic looking lot, no wonder so many women seek the company and sexual attention of other women.

Thankfully, I’m here to raise the standard.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?

Have you checked for the barcode on the underside?

Its hidden under the reduced sticker

Well then it’s clearly out of date

Best to toss then."

Lockdown has produced plenty of tossing.

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By *olex99Man
over a year ago

Hull

Of course, she may be right. That area's cock could have gone downhill. Maybe she needs to widen her search. On the other hand, she could be a mardy git!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I keep mine well oiled and give it a good service at least once a day.

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

"I keep mine well oiled and give it a good service at least once a day.

Watch it doesn’t fall off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Taking notes

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

" This was a delightful status update from a lady in my area feed.

Now normally if someone says something and it doesn't apply to you, you really shouldn't fret. But I did.

How do I quality assure my cock? How do I know it meets the high grade requirements of the masses of fab? It doesn't have a barcode or best before date on it.

So everyone, how do you quality assure a cock?"

Think you have this wrong, if the pussy/attitude isn’t great, what it attracts will be pro rata.

Ducked one there!

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Misreading this initially as "quality cock" has gone, left me wondering what I had missed! Panic over

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I agree, I might turn straight. I do worry that I will lose my ability to coordinate my soft furnishings.

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