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Why Are Some People So Keen To Pigeon Hole?

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By *ordan02081995 OP   Man
over a year ago

Crosspool

I have noticed that a lot of men on the forum who may identify as straight but like to have fun with someone of the same sex are being called out for not having their profile listed as bi. Why do people feel so keen to pigeon hole? Why is there such a need to define your sexuality? Surely people should be free to play and experiment without worrying about labels?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

because its diss honest, and makes you wander what else is beeing hidden sorry, honesty is key in swinging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You will always get people that think if you don't identify as bisexual but sometimes like to play with men or would like to try that you are somehow deceptive.

But if a woman says that she straight, But then has varies from women not many people say anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"because its diss honest, and makes you wander what else is beeing hidden sorry, honesty is key in swinging"

Why is it dishonest?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"because its diss honest, and makes you wander what else is beeing hidden sorry, honesty is key in swinging

Why is it dishonest?"

well because it is, if you are bi or bicurious then tell people, its only fair, if a mans profile says straight we would never meet them, doesnt meen there has to be bi fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"because its diss honest, and makes you wander what else is beeing hidden sorry, honesty is key in swinging

Why is it dishonest?

well because it is, if you are bi or bicurious then tell people, its only fair, if a mans profile says straight we would never meet them, doesnt meen there has to be bi fun"

Do you say the same when a woman's profile says straight but she has play varies from women?

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only

Not everyone feels like they need to label everything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"because its diss honest, and makes you wander what else is beeing hidden sorry, honesty is key in swinging

Why is it dishonest?

well because it is, if you are bi or bicurious then tell people, its only fair, if a mans profile says straight we would never meet them, doesnt meen there has to be bi fun

Do you say the same when a woman's profile says straight but she has play varies from women?"

yes of course its no different

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not everyone feels like they need to label everything "

Exactly some people find labels helpful some don't. Do what feels right for you. You'll always find those that disagree but it's your journey not theirs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not everyone feels like they need to label everything

Exactly some people find labels helpful some don't. Do what feels right for you. You'll always find those that disagree but it's your journey not theirs"

Totally agree.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

on a site like this, you can only really go on what the profile says to make a choice, so the more honest the profile is the easyer it is to know who you would like to meet, thats just our opinion, others may think otherwise, but its our choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"on a site like this, you can only really go on what the profile says to make a choice, so the more honest the profile is the easyer it is to know who you would like to meet, thats just our opinion, others may think otherwise, but its our choice"

It is personal choice what people choose to declare and I don't see if you don't identify as bisexual or gay how that is dishonest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Theres a difference between bi guys and girls on the acceptance level.

If a girl says shes bi then its deemed as being hot by the majority and widely accepted by those who don't.

For guys it's different in as much as theres a stigma attached.

It's no more dishonest than not showing your face on your profile for all to see.

Everyone's sexuality is their own business and should someone decide to keep that private it's their business but should that be shared with you privately then instead of ridicule you should feel honoured that a guy would reveal a side of himself he may not be comfortable with sharing to everyone... just saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"on a site like this, you can only really go on what the profile says to make a choice, so the more honest the profile is the easyer it is to know who you would like to meet, thats just our opinion, others may think otherwise, but its our choice

It is personal choice what people choose to declare and I don't see if you don't identify as bisexual or gay how that is dishonest."
ok then, im 8 foot tall and a super model, not much different really, its still dishonesty, dont get why someone whouldnt tell the truth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"on a site like this, you can only really go on what the profile says to make a choice, so the more honest the profile is the easyer it is to know who you would like to meet, thats just our opinion, others may think otherwise, but its our choice

It is personal choice what people choose to declare and I don't see if you don't identify as bisexual or gay how that is dishonest.ok then, im 8 foot tall and a super model, not much different really, its still dishonesty, dont get why someone whouldnt tell the truth"

That is totally different.

It is none of anybody's business whether somebody is bi sexual or not.

If they say they are straight and then try on with you in person that's totally different.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"on a site like this, you can only really go on what the profile says to make a choice, so the more honest the profile is the easyer it is to know who you would like to meet, thats just our opinion, others may think otherwise, but its our choice

It is personal choice what people choose to declare and I don't see if you don't identify as bisexual or gay how that is dishonest.ok then, im 8 foot tall and a super model, not much different really, its still dishonesty, dont get why someone whouldnt tell the truth

That is totally different.

It is none of anybody's business whether somebody is bi sexual or not.

If they say they are straight and then try on with you in person that's totally different.

"

wouldnt you like to know before the meet, i know we would

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only


"Theres a difference between bi guys and girls on the acceptance level.

If a girl says shes bi then its deemed as being hot by the majority and widely accepted by those who don't.

For guys it's different in as much as theres a stigma attached.

It's no more dishonest than not showing your face on your profile for all to see.

Everyone's sexuality is their own business and should someone decide to keep that private it's their business but should that be shared with you privately then instead of ridicule you should feel honoured that a guy would reveal a side of himself he may not be comfortable with sharing to everyone... just saying "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"on a site like this, you can only really go on what the profile says to make a choice, so the more honest the profile is the easyer it is to know who you would like to meet, thats just our opinion, others may think otherwise, but its our choice

It is personal choice what people choose to declare and I don't see if you don't identify as bisexual or gay how that is dishonest.ok then, im 8 foot tall and a super model, not much different really, its still dishonesty, dont get why someone whouldnt tell the truth

That is totally different.

It is none of anybody's business whether somebody is bi sexual or not.

If they say they are straight and then try on with you in person that's totally different.

wouldnt you like to know before the meet, i know we would"

If a man was bisexual or not it would make a difference to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the wort one for us, is meeting someone who says they are bi one the profile, but when it comes down to it they really arent, just use it to play with the fem, for us thats worse, and we have had this, and then you look at thier profile in a few days and their sexuality has changed to straight

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By *ersnickety PantsWoman
over a year ago

Club Meets Only


"the wort one for us, is meeting someone who says they are bi one the profile, but when it comes down to it they really arent, just use it to play with the fem, for us thats worse, and we have had this, and then you look at thier profile in a few days and their sexuality has changed to straight"

That is a twat move & I'd be pretty annoyed too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We don't agree with the idea of pigeon-holing people's sexuality because to us it's a spectrum, not a sequence of binaries. However, labels are helpful, and as another poster has suggested, you can only go off what people write on their profile.

Many straight single guys on here try and cast as wide a net as possible and realise pretty quickly that there's a lot of homophobes (and let's not beat around the bush, that's what they are) that say they won't meet Bi men or men who will meet trans people etc. So most say they are Straight even if they are not.

As someone who has been a single guy on here for many years, I can understand the psychology of this. However, as I have aged and become more accepting of my own sexuality, I have begun to realise that I wouldn't want to meet any of the women/couples who don't want to meet Bi/bi-curious men anyway, so it is a pointless endeavour. Why would you want to meet someone who would discriminate against you based on who you like to sleep with? As long as you play safe and aren't compromising their sexual health, what business is it of theirs?

We get a lot of messages from men who's profile says they are Straight, only for them to tell us they're actually Bi-curious/Bisexual or Hetero-flexible. A lot of these men are just saying it so they can get some action with the female half of the couple, and many more don't want to be open about it for the reason I mentioned above. Either way, it makes you question their authenticity.

We have no doubt there are people who identify as Straight who occasionally like to experiment with their sexuality, and there's nothing wrong with that, it doesn't make them Gay or Bi or anything they don't feel they identify with. However, particularly as a couple, we choose to play the odds on this one. It's just the safest way to play it on Fab!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"the wort one for us, is meeting someone who says they are bi one the profile, but when it comes down to it they really arent, just use it to play with the fem, for us thats worse, and we have had this, and then you look at thier profile in a few days and their sexuality has changed to straight

That is a twat move & I'd be pretty annoyed too.

"
weve had it a few times, the meets end quickly, we are supper honest on our profile what we are looking for, just meet up with a straight couple instead, but then on fab these things happen i suppose, thats why honesty is so important to us i suppose.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have noticed that a lot of men on the forum who may identify as straight but like to have fun with someone of the same sex are being called out for not having their profile listed as bi. Why do people feel so keen to pigeon hole? Why is there such a need to define your sexuality? Surely people should be free to play and experiment without worrying about labels? "

For us it’s all about honesty and nothing else.

We would die defending your right to be who or what you like but if you can’t be honest with yourself how or why would we expect you to be honest with us and we look for honesty in a playmate along with respect and connection.

T

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"the wort one for us, is meeting someone who says they are bi one the profile, but when it comes down to it they really arent, just use it to play with the fem, for us thats worse, and we have had this, and then you look at thier profile in a few days and their sexuality has changed to straight"

Tell them the men will suck and fuck first while the lady just watches. That puts off the straight ones.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just assume everyone on here has been shagging anything that moves. Can't believe anything on profiles is true.

I think sexuality shouldn't be a tick box on profiles. People lie so it's irrelevant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have noticed that a lot of men on the forum who may identify as straight but like to have fun with someone of the same sex are being called out for not having their profile listed as bi. Why do people feel so keen to pigeon hole? Why is there such a need to define your sexuality? Surely people should be free to play and experiment without worrying about labels?

For us it’s all about honesty and nothing else.

We would die defending your right to be who or what you like but if you can’t be honest with yourself how or why would we expect you to be honest with us and we look for honesty in a playmate along with respect and connection.

T"

That's exactly how we feel about our Profile its honest in what we are looking for and we look for that in other profiles too , we wouldnt want people to not be or play as themselves , although most of the time people dont bother reading them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hetewzible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hetewzible"

Perhaps my glasses need checking

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