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What is vanilla sex?

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By *mber OP   Woman
over a year ago

Preston

People talk about "vanilla" sex. But what actually is vanilla sex?

It's easy to categorise some things as kink (BDSM for example)

But what does vanilla mean?. Some people use it to mean boring, does it have to be boring?

Is missionary vanilla?

What about if your hands are tied?

What about if someone grabs your throat?

What if they talk filth?

I genuinely don't know what people mean when they say "vanilla"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think , on here, it's used as a term to indicate boring sex

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I personally don’t think of vanilla sex as boring.

I just think of it as just a way of stating the “standard” sex positions.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

I like vanilla

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think for some vanilla is seen as boring

Personally I adore 'vanilla'. Slow, sensual, passionate, eye contact, lots of kissing, all that closeness in missionary as he slides inside me. Feeling his body against mine or mine against his. Seeing the pleasure in his face as we get lost in the sensations.

How anyone could describe that as boring is beyond me.

For some though, they just need diffrent experiences, diffrent sensations. There's no right or wrong and there is a place for both. Maybe even at the same time.

That's the beauty of sex, it's never the same twice and it constantly evolves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always assumed it was meant as bland, unadventurous with the same routine and position, maybe trying doggy sometimes if they felt naughty

Certainly not involving others in your sex life.

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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire


"I think for some vanilla is seen as boring

Personally I adore 'vanilla'. Slow, sensual, passionate, eye contact, lots of kissing, all that closeness in missionary as he slides inside me. Feeling his body against mine or mine against his. Seeing the pleasure in his face as we get lost in the sensations.

How anyone could describe that as boring is beyond me.

For some though, they just need diffrent experiences, diffrent sensations. There's no right or wrong and there is a place for both. Maybe even at the same time.

That's the beauty of sex, it's never the same twice and it constantly evolves. "
this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people mean it as anything non-kink related. I like vanilla though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m vanilla and proud

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place


"I think for some vanilla is seen as boring

Personally I adore 'vanilla'. Slow, sensual, passionate, eye contact, lots of kissing, all that closeness in missionary as he slides inside me. Feeling his body against mine or mine against his. Seeing the pleasure in his face as we get lost in the sensations.

How anyone could describe that as boring is beyond me.

For some though, they just need diffrent experiences, diffrent sensations. There's no right or wrong and there is a place for both. Maybe even at the same time.

That's the beauty of sex, it's never the same twice and it constantly evolves. "

Very well said. And just because someone likes vanilla it doesn’t mean they can’t also like other flavours too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

our take on vanilla is that it is sex with people who are in a relationship with each other or seeking a relationship with the person there having sex with...not random meets for just sex as in a fb or more than 2 people and has emotional ties..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think for some vanilla is seen as boring

Personally I adore 'vanilla'. Slow, sensual, passionate, eye contact, lots of kissing, all that closeness in missionary as he slides inside me. Feeling his body against mine or mine against his. Seeing the pleasure in his face as we get lost in the sensations.

How anyone could describe that as boring is beyond me.

For some though, they just need diffrent experiences, diffrent sensations. There's no right or wrong and there is a place for both. Maybe even at the same time.

That's the beauty of sex, it's never the same twice and it constantly evolves.

Very well said. And just because someone likes vanilla it doesn’t mean they can’t also like other flavours too! "

Yup and you can always add extra sauce, sprinkles or a flake

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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire


"our take on vanilla is that it is sex with people who are in a relationship with each other or seeking a relationship with the person there having sex with...not random meets for just sex as in a fb or more than 2 people and has emotional ties.."
I wouldnt say that I've had good vanilla sex with meets and kinky sex depends on what happens

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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire


"I think for some vanilla is seen as boring

Personally I adore 'vanilla'. Slow, sensual, passionate, eye contact, lots of kissing, all that closeness in missionary as he slides inside me. Feeling his body against mine or mine against his. Seeing the pleasure in his face as we get lost in the sensations.

How anyone could describe that as boring is beyond me.

For some though, they just need diffrent experiences, diffrent sensations. There's no right or wrong and there is a place for both. Maybe even at the same time.

That's the beauty of sex, it's never the same twice and it constantly evolves.

Very well said. And just because someone likes vanilla it doesn’t mean they can’t also like other flavours too!

Yup and you can always add extra sauce, sprinkles or a flake "
exactly

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

[Removed by poster at 06/06/20 08:15:34]

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

It's just conventional sex (any position), no kink, fetish or bdsm included

Lots of people on here do it, I prefer to add a kink but each to their own

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By *mber OP   Woman
over a year ago

Preston

But that's the question.

When does it pass from vanilla to kink?

What is added to turn one into the other?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vanilla is missionary, basic sexual position. If you add anything to that like cuffs and blindfolds etc. Its classed as kinky.

Kinky rules anyday for me

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Personally *if* I use it or see it, I just take it as being a way of describing plain vanilla sex that is generally considered "normal" by the majority - I certainly don't use it or see it as a derogatory term, and actually enjoy vanilla sex just as much as any other brand.

I first came across it in the BDSM world where it is quite widely used to refer to sex outside of that world - so that is probably what drives my definition.

On here it seems to refer to those that don't indulge in swinging or NSA sex.

In every day parlance though and for those outside of any kind of "sex world" I would imagine most would see it as a flavour of ice cream or syrup for coffee etc

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By *alking HeadMan
over a year ago

Bolton

Vanilla sex is inserting a length of a vanilla pod down the urethra. It's not for everyone. But it does make your pee smell nice.

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By *ictoriaathomeTV/TS
over a year ago

Huddersfield


"I think for some vanilla is seen as boring

Personally I adore 'vanilla'. Slow, sensual, passionate, eye contact, lots of kissing, all that closeness in missionary as he slides inside me. Feeling his body against mine or mine against his. Seeing the pleasure in his face as we get lost in the sensations.

How anyone could describe that as boring is beyond me.

For some though, they just need diffrent experiences, diffrent sensations. There's no right or wrong and there is a place for both. Maybe even at the same time.

That's the beauty of sex, it's never the same twice and it constantly evolves. "

Beautifuly put!!

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

I love vanilla sex depending on what mood we’re in...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's only kink if other people do it

I rather like looking into anothers eyes alive with fire the feel of two bodies fully connected two minds enjoying each other and two wet tangled sets of limbs entwined.....

Then just lay together and the feel of another hearts bearing as one, tracing fingers across skin discovering what makes that other shiver with delight laughing talking breathing in that other and sharing those moments....until.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

* hearts beating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vanilla, for me anyway, is the same routine, same place, same position, saying no to trying anything new, keeping the lights off, no excitement......basically my ex!

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By *mber OP   Woman
over a year ago

Preston

Good answers fabbers.

Interesting to see how we all have different opinions on it ranging from boring to sensual, anything without props to anything with only two people.

Just shows how we're all different.

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By *abonWoman
over a year ago

L’boro/Ashby & Cheltenham


"It's only kink if other people do it

I rather like looking into anothers eyes alive with fire the feel of two bodies fully connected two minds enjoying each other and two wet tangled sets of limbs entwined.....

Then just lay together and the feel of another hearts bearing as one, tracing fingers across skin discovering what makes that other shiver with delight laughing talking breathing in that other and sharing those moments....until.....

"

Carry on...

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By *abonWoman
over a year ago

L’boro/Ashby & Cheltenham


"People talk about "vanilla" sex. But what actually is vanilla sex?

It's easy to categorise some things as kink (BDSM for example)

But what does vanilla mean?. Some people use it to mean boring, does it have to be boring?

Is missionary vanilla?

What about if your hands are tied?

What about if someone grabs your throat?

What if they talk filth?

I genuinely don't know what people mean when they say "vanilla""

I’ve always got the vibe from this site that vanilla sex is usually viewed as something a bit dull...I think people have different interpretations of what it means, how much they like it, when/how, and where the line is when crossing over into something a bit more.

I’m glad simple sensual sex is appreciated to!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought it was having sex with Robert van winkle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

"

But surely a hand in your throat and slapping your tits then makes it non vanilla?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vanilla = boring.

However there's no boring sex with the right people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

But surely a hand in your throat and slapping your tits then makes it non vanilla? "

Sounds like a good time to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

But surely a hand in your throat and slapping your tits then makes it non vanilla?

Sounds like a good time to me "

Don't get me wrong. I'm in complete agreement with Annie, a hand on the throat and a slapped tit or face do it for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

But surely a hand in your throat and slapping your tits then makes it non vanilla? "

I’d say it still comes under the vanilla umbrella as it’s still just a standard position.

I think vanilla is when you’ll have penetrative vaginal sex, even blow jobs and wanking but that’s where it ends.

Like guys that won’t have stuff done to their bum I say they’re vanilla.

I wanna rim, I want to massage prostates and I want to fuck guys in the arse, if they aren’t up for at least 1 of those things then they’re boring.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vanilla can be the best sex with someone and the worst with someone else... The same as anything really... What people like shouldn't have to be a comparison... Mine is better than yours /yours is boring... Vanilla sex with my fwb feels better than any kind of sex with anyone else

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By *oneyjule65Couple
over a year ago

Halifax


"Vanilla sex is inserting a length of a vanilla pod down the urethra. It's not for everyone. But it does make your pee smell nice. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think for some vanilla is seen as boring

Personally I adore 'vanilla'. Slow, sensual, passionate, eye contact, lots of kissing, all that closeness in missionary as he slides inside me. Feeling his body against mine or mine against his. Seeing the pleasure in his face as we get lost in the sensations.

How anyone could describe that as boring is beyond me.

For some though, they just need diffrent experiences, diffrent sensations. There's no right or wrong and there is a place for both. Maybe even at the same time.

That's the beauty of sex, it's never the same twice and it constantly evolves. "

This!! Definitely!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

But surely a hand in your throat and slapping your tits then makes it non vanilla?

I’d say it still comes under the vanilla umbrella as it’s still just a standard position.

I think vanilla is when you’ll have penetrative vaginal sex, even blow jobs and wanking but that’s where it ends.

Like guys that won’t have stuff done to their bum I say they’re vanilla.

I wanna rim, I want to massage prostates and I want to fuck guys in the arse, if they aren’t up for at least 1 of those things then they’re boring. "

When are we meeting again? Lol!!

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By *lbinoGorillaMan
over a year ago

Redditch


"Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

But surely a hand in your throat and slapping your tits then makes it non vanilla?

I’d say it still comes under the vanilla umbrella as it’s still just a standard position.

I think vanilla is when you’ll have penetrative vaginal sex, even blow jobs and wanking but that’s where it ends.

Like guys that won’t have stuff done to their bum I say they’re vanilla.

I wanna rim, I want to massage prostates and I want to fuck guys in the arse, if they aren’t up for at least 1 of those things then they’re boring. "

I'm keen to experiment. Where do I sign up?

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By *mber OP   Woman
over a year ago

Preston


"Vanilla is lush, it’s comfy in a bed, missionary position, the guys full body weight on me, can reach my hand down to rub my bean the same time, guy can slap my tits or put a hand round my throat and it’s guaranteed orgasm city. Perfect position then for him to slink down and eat his cum out of me.

But surely a hand in your throat and slapping your tits then makes it non vanilla?

Sounds like a good time to me

Don't get me wrong. I'm in complete agreement with Annie, a hand on the throat and a slapped tit or face do it for me "

I agree and that's what I was getting at. Does this then become none vanilla.

Maybe it's good quality vanilla, with sprinkles or something.

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By *angOnBunnyCouple
over a year ago

Ipswich


"Vanilla = boring.

However there's no boring sex with the right people."

Jeez, in that case we've had some serious vanilla sex off this site then!!

Don't really like the word vanilla, but if we were to label it it would be closed mind to exploring fantasies and new experiences

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vanilla sex is to lie down on your back, spread your legs, look at the ceiling and think of England.

I'm so vanilla

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Vanilla does not equal boring.

Generally means one on one with no theatre....... ( my interpretation )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People talk about "vanilla" sex. But what actually is vanilla sex?

It's easy to categorise some things as kink (BDSM for example)

But what does vanilla mean?. Some people use it to mean boring, does it have to be boring?

Is missionary vanilla?

What about if your hands are tied?

What about if someone grabs your throat?

What if they talk filth?

I genuinely don't know what people mean when they say "vanilla""
its another one of them absolutely ridiculous labels that has stuck in order to make something else appear so different but the reality is it means nothing

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Vanilla sex is to lie down on your back, spread your legs, look at the ceiling and think of England.

I'm so vanilla "

and what do the women do to him while he's on his back ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With hubby lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To me vanilla means no toys are being used.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla sex is to lie down on your back, spread your legs, look at the ceiling and think of England.

I'm so vanilla

and what do the women do to him while he's on his back ?"

I don't know. I'm the one led on back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To me it means that someone is not willing to explore beyond the standard, well accepted activities. Or throws upon anything 'out there', more than a softcore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Vanilla or otherwise, how can you class anything related to sex as boring. Always found it more interesting in general tbh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla does not equal boring.

Generally means one on one with no theatre....... ( my interpretation )

"

I would disagree. I've been one and one and done some very non vanilla stuff, like being caned to give one example.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla does not equal boring.

Generally means one on one with no theatre....... ( my interpretation )

I would disagree. I've been one and one and done some very non vanilla stuff, like being caned to give one example. "

Ooo..please elaborate!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me, vanilla sex is like a bowl of potato wedges. Great at first but then bring out the dips

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Vanilla does not equal boring.

Generally means one on one with no theatre....... ( my interpretation )

I would disagree. I've been one and one and done some very non vanilla stuff, like being caned to give one example.

Ooo..please elaborate!!"

Ha! No chance, I can't be bothered with the messages

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"Vanilla does not equal boring.

Generally means one on one with no theatre....... ( my interpretation )

I would disagree. I've been one and one and done some very non vanilla stuff, like being caned to give one example. "

I did say one on one without theatre.

Caning is definitely not vanilla

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love vanilla, to me it just means sex without kink or role play. I think a little bit of spanking or choking can come under vanilla too, but if it becomes a full on spanking session, like over the knee kind of thing then that moves more into kink for me!

It’s probably a spectrum that’s different for everyone!

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By *organ and rob zombieCouple
over a year ago

bradford

We nearly always have What most people would call vanilla sex, as stated before, 1 on 1 with no particular kinks involved, just “normal” sex? It’s what we like doing, we don’t find it boring at all! I could imagine it being referred to as boring by people who are Perhaps frustrated or feel unfulfilled with “normal” sex? Just our thoughts

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