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Plough me

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

My hubby just said he wanted to plough me . Im still pissing myself laughing. What sexual slang have or would you use for a laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ll pump yi

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming

Never understood why some men want to ‘smash ya back doors in’....

Doesn’t sound like fun....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stuff the fish taco

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’ll pump yi"

That one always makes me giggle

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By *on12xxMan
over a year ago

leeds

Play hide, the, sausage

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Never understood why some men want to ‘smash ya back doors in’....

Doesn’t sound like fun...."

If that happened im sure id not walk for a week

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

I'm gonna bone ya like a freshly caught Salmon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Never understood why some men want to ‘smash ya back doors in’....

Doesn’t sound like fun...."

I hate that expression....

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

I had a couple in a club ask to use me as a sex toy, I obliged , still makes me smile xx

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

He wants to harvest your seeds haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Stuff the fish taco"

Im laughing so hard here I couldnt type properly lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Play hide, the, sausage"

Omg I use this with hubby lol

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..


"Stuff the fish taco"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit "

Youve made my hubby piss himself laughing especially the granny comment

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm gonna bone ya like a freshly caught Salmon "

, ive laughed so hard last nights makeup has run down my face lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Never understood why some men want to ‘smash ya back doors in’....

Doesn’t sound like fun....

I hate that expression...."
I agree and its commonly used more then most I've come across lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One woman did say to me I'm gonna bounce on you like a space hopper

I'm still not sure if she meant I was a bit fat or if she wanted to just bounce up and down on my cock lots but the sex was good either way lol

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"I'm gonna bone ya like a freshly caught Salmon

, ive laughed so hard last nights makeup has run down my face lol "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Youve made my hubby piss himself laughing especially the granny comment "
does he need to change his shorts lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honker

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

I'm fond of "up to ya nuts in guts"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I had a couple in a club ask to use me as a sex toy, I obliged , still makes me smile xx "

Now I like the sound of this one

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"He wants to harvest your seeds haha"

Omg lol, most of these sayings ive never heard of lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"One woman did say to me I'm gonna bounce on you like a space hopper

I'm still not sure if she meant I was a bit fat or if she wanted to just bounce up and down on my cock lots but the sex was good either way lol"

Ive visions of you being orange now

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Honker"

You say you want to honker a woman? Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"One woman did say to me I'm gonna bounce on you like a space hopper

I'm still not sure if she meant I was a bit fat or if she wanted to just bounce up and down on my cock lots but the sex was good either way lol

Ive visions of you being orange now "
great friend zoned and orange

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm fond of "up to ya nuts in guts""

Ewwwwwww lol yes it can get messy i guess

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"One woman did say to me I'm gonna bounce on you like a space hopper

I'm still not sure if she meant I was a bit fat or if she wanted to just bounce up and down on my cock lots but the sex was good either way lol

Ive visions of you being orange now great friend zoned and orange "

And horns like a space hopper

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was once told by someone they were about to give some "c#ck worship". I'm still not sure what that meant, but I was a little nervous for a few moments

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit "

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

I want to fuck you into next week ...

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

Someone asked to Fuck me because I made them harder than a Rubik cube !!! Strange chat up line but sweet x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Smash ya gash was a good when we were kids lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" I was once told by someone they were about to give some "c#ck worship". I'm still not sure what that meant, but I was a little nervous for a few moments "

I visualized people around you in robes for a second and an altar

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!! "

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I want to fuck you into next week ... "

This is another classic lol I cant stop laughing when this is said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol"

Yes. And now we've gotten side tracked and I'm STILL waiting to plough you and sow some seed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Someone asked to Fuck me because I made them harder than a Rubik cube !!! Strange chat up line but sweet x "

Thats hilarious, I can think of millions of things harder then a rubik cube

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most disturbing one I've ever heard said to a young ladie not by me I might add I'm gonna fuck you so hard your grandchildren will still feel it

That was a mate of mine when he was pissed one night to a woman who was about 20

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

Drill you like a oil well.

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

Was also told in a club that i was going to be done like i had been fucked by a chuffa train . X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol

Yes. And now we've gotten side tracked and I'm STILL waiting to plough you and sow some seed."
that's dirtier than a pot noodle that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swim against the tide

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Smash ya gash was a good when we were kids lol "

I probably wouldn't have known what that was back then lol my innocent day

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol

Yes. And now we've gotten side tracked and I'm STILL waiting to plough you and sow some seed."

Well you can wait till after lol plus wheres my coffee you promised me lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol

Yes. And now we've gotten side tracked and I'm STILL waiting to plough you and sow some seed. that's dirtier than a pot noodle that "

 (closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Most disturbing one I've ever heard said to a young ladie not by me I might add I'm gonna fuck you so hard your grandchildren will still feel it

That was a mate of mine when he was pissed one night to a woman who was about 20 "

Omg WD you literally made me crack up so much ive just had a coughing fit (not virus related)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm gonna bone ya like a freshly caught Salmon "

Haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Drill you like a oil well."

, Brilliant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, foxy laughed so hard she gave herself an orgasm

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Was also told in a club that i was going to be done like i had been fucked by a chuffa train . X "

Omg I just had to ask what a chuffa was lol

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

I did hear someone say once, "tenderize your piss flaps".

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol

Yes. And now we've gotten side tracked and I'm STILL waiting to plough you and sow some seed. that's dirtier than a pot noodle that "

What flavour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did hear someone say once, "tenderize your piss flaps"."

Now that's sexy AF

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Most disturbing one I've ever heard said to a young ladie not by me I might add I'm gonna fuck you so hard your grandchildren will still feel it

That was a mate of mine when he was pissed one night to a woman who was about 20

Omg WD you literally made me crack up so much ive just had a coughing fit (not virus related) "
hope you recovered ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol

Yes. And now we've gotten side tracked and I'm STILL waiting to plough you and sow some seed. that's dirtier than a pot noodle that

What flavour "
Bombay bad boy

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich


"I did hear someone say once, "tenderize your piss flaps"."

Funny as Fuck, not sure that this would get a woman frothy , lol xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did hear someone say once, "tenderize your piss flaps"."

I just visualized someone using one of then wooden meat bashers with the spikes (new kinky toy) lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Most disturbing one I've ever heard said to a young ladie not by me I might add I'm gonna fuck you so hard your grandchildren will still feel it

That was a mate of mine when he was pissed one night to a woman who was about 20

Omg WD you literally made me crack up so much ive just had a coughing fit (not virus related) hope you recovered ok"

My voice and throat are scratchy now lol. Ive had a few pm me saying they cant stop laughing at all the comments, that made my day tbh x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did hear someone say once, "tenderize your piss flaps".

Now that's sexy AF "

Ewwwww lol

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

I ask Mr if he wants a shottie on me

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Best one I heard was I'm gonna smash the granny out of you.

Or ride you like sea biscuit

Like fucking sea biscuit I'm dying!!

You started this hubby wanting to plough me lol

Yes. And now we've gotten side tracked and I'm STILL waiting to plough you and sow some seed. that's dirtier than a pot noodle that

What flavour Bombay bad boy"

Well thsts definitely the messiest and dirtiest lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did hear someone say once, "tenderize your piss flaps".

Funny as Fuck, not sure that this would get a woman frothy , lol xx "

"Frothy"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I ask Mr if he wants a shottie on me

Mrs TMN x"

Whats a Shottie?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Most disturbing one I've ever heard said to a young ladie not by me I might add I'm gonna fuck you so hard your grandchildren will still feel it

That was a mate of mine when he was pissed one night to a woman who was about 20

Omg WD you literally made me crack up so much ive just had a coughing fit (not virus related) hope you recovered ok

My voice and throat are scratchy now lol. Ive had a few pm me saying they cant stop laughing at all the comments, that made my day tbh x"
good good and it's only just gone 10 a good day ahead then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want to make you airtight

I want to fuck you so hard I’ll bruise the back of your tonsils

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I go down on you I’ll be like a pig sniffing for truffles...

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By *ink Panther 123Man
over a year ago

Colnbrook

Horizontal shuffle

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I want to make you airtight

I want to fuck you so hard I’ll bruise the back of your tonsils "

Airtight lol and ive definitely had bruised tonsils lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"When I go down on you I’ll be like a pig sniffing for truffles... "

Omg , no making snorting grunting sounds though ok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My arse will be going like a fiddlers elbow as I rattle your insides

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Horizontal shuffle "

Im trying to picture this lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give you a good rattling

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"My arse will be going like a fiddlers elbow as I rattle your insides"

Im picturing your arse in fast motion at the minute, my minds in the gutter

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Give you a good rattling "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lovingly ruined

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

?

Someone once told me he'd give me oral so good that I'd be peddling his ears like a bicycle

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By *hrissycox66TV/TS
over a year ago

watford

I once heard my mate say.

I'm going to scramble her eggs

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm gonna ride you like I stole you.

I'm gonna fuck your brains out!

I always liked my brains where they are

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"I ask Mr if he wants a shottie on me

Mrs TMN x

Whats a Shottie? "

A shottie, as in Doric dialect for a shot, as in a Scottish term for a turn!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Lovingly ruined "

I like this one

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Someone once told me he'd give me oral so good that I'd be peddling his ears like a bicycle "

Omg where do they come out with these comments lol, most believe what they are saying too

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I once heard my mate say.

I'm going to scramble her eggs

Lol"

Pmsl

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm gonna ride you like I stole you.

I'm gonna fuck your brains out!

I always liked my brains where they are "

me too lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I ask Mr if he wants a shottie on me

Mrs TMN x

Whats a Shottie?

A shottie, as in Doric dialect for a shot, as in a Scottish term for a turn! "

Oh lol I use to know all Scottish slang as had loads of army friends but ive forgotten most lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She will have a face like a painters radio when I am finished

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"She will have a face like a painters radio when I am finished "

Omg I did have to think about that for a second then i burst out laughing and still am lol

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas

I’d tap that ass

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want to make you airtight

I want to fuck you so hard I’ll bruise the back of your tonsils "

Blimey

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’d tap that ass "

Tapping is good lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I want to make you airtight

I want to fuck you so hard I’ll bruise the back of your tonsils

Blimey "

Noones reached my tonsils

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wanna slime ya.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wanna slime ya."

Ewwwww

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’d tap that ass "
oh your such a flirt tap away then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm gona "Bridge your gap"ha ha fuck knows I just thought of it. Think it means join your holes ha ha ha...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I want to make you airtight

I want to fuck you so hard I’ll bruise the back of your tonsils

Blimey

Noones reached my tonsils "

Ha ha a challenge for hubby then. He has plenty of time to practise

Loving these posts this morning. Thanks for sharing OP. Airtight... genius

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm gona "Bridge your gap"ha ha fuck knows I just thought of it. Think it means join your holes ha ha ha..."

Definitely a good one to use lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I want to make you airtight

I want to fuck you so hard I’ll bruise the back of your tonsils

Blimey

Noones reached my tonsils

Ha ha a challenge for hubby then. He has plenty of time to practise

Loving these posts this morning. Thanks for sharing OP. Airtight... genius "

Hubby is banned as took hjm 45 mins to make me a coffee, I made the first in 2 mins lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I want to make you airtight

I want to fuck you so hard I’ll bruise the back of your tonsils

Blimey

Noones reached my tonsils

Ha ha a challenge for hubby then. He has plenty of time to practise

Loving these posts this morning. Thanks for sharing OP. Airtight... genius "

Got to be honest ive not laughed so much in ages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Getting “all in the guts” or “re-arranging your guts”—it’s a phrase from Chicago (Where M is from). Gross, but comedy all at the same time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Getting “all in the guts” or “re-arranging your guts”—it’s a phrase from Chicago (Where M is from). Gross, but comedy all at the same time. "

Nice! I like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn't mind losing my helmet in your mine!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you need some make up remover, I have just the 'solution'"

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

Heard someone say in a resurant " wish she would shut her legs, I can see what she had for for dinner " made me giggle xx

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By *elle xWoman
over a year ago

Doire Theas


"I’d tap that ass oh your such a flirt tap away then "

Are you sure you want your ass tapped

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Park and Ride. Have made a few who know me grin and giggle with it. An in joke as you need to know me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Getting “all in the guts” or “re-arranging your guts”—it’s a phrase from Chicago (Where M is from). Gross, but comedy all at the same time. "

Thsts what its about, especially if you know the person then it becomes hilarious like my hubbys comment this morning lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


""If you need some make up remover, I have just the 'solution'""

Wheres my coffe lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Heard someone say in a resurant " wish she would shut her legs, I can see what she had for for dinner " made me giggle xx "

Omg i used that the other day regarding a photo I saw

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Park and Ride. Have made a few who know me grin and giggle with it. An in joke as you need to know me."

Thats a brilliant one lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance "

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol

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By *otsMan
over a year ago

Higham

Ride that man in a boat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol "
well heard like hairy faces maybe keep you warm by using my face as a chair

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ride that man in a boat"

Cant believe theres so many funny sayings

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol well heard like hairy faces maybe keep you warm by using my face as a chair "

Not heard this one lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol well heard like hairy faces maybe keep you warm by using my face as a chair

Not heard this one lol "
rather you feel it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're taking the beef bus to fish town!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol well heard like hairy faces maybe keep you warm by using my face as a chair

Not heard this one lol rather you feel it "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol well heard like hairy faces maybe keep you warm by using my face as a chair

Not heard this one lol rather you feel it

"
would send a face pic for beard judgement but have too wait 12 years haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We're taking the beef bus to fish town! "
I like to enquire about the free blow job

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol well heard like hairy faces maybe keep you warm by using my face as a chair

Not heard this one lol rather you feel it

would send a face pic for beard judgement but have too wait 12 years haha"

13 years isnt that long lovely lol, I can see your beard in your pics, its awesome btw x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"‘For the next 30-45 seconds I’m gonna make you see Jesus’

‘I’m gonna be late home but when I get back I’m going down town to booty town. Unless you’re asleep then I’ll go play Xbox instead. Do we still need toilet roll?’

Romance

, i definitely dont want to see jesus lol well heard like hairy faces maybe keep you warm by using my face as a chair

Not heard this one lol rather you feel it

would send a face pic for beard judgement but have too wait 12 years haha

13 years isnt that long lovely lol, I can see your beard in your pics, its awesome btw x "
thank you ahh well your on my hotlist so was worth a ask

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By *ob Carpe DiemMan
over a year ago

Torquay

Uphill gardener was a term for gay if I recall, I think I can guess why

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By *rK MrsJCouple
over a year ago

Kidderminster

Heard some one say I'm going to fuck you silly

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By *emma HoldenTV/TS
over a year ago

Ramsey

I recall a line from a Macc Lads song many years ago that said "I'll rattle me potatoes against your dirt box" which always made me chuckle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pasty smashing x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Uphill gardener was a term for gay if I recall, I think I can guess why"

I wouldn't have a clue lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Heard some one say I'm going to fuck you silly"

Ive heard this a few times, i should ask what they mean lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I recall a line from a Macc Lads song many years ago that said "I'll rattle me potatoes against your dirt box" which always made me chuckle. "

Dirt box made me laugh lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Pasty smashing x"

Pmsl now this ones so blooming funny

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

We regularly had nights in the pub (omg remember those) talking rubbish and one night was silly made up terms for sex.

I think the winner was,

Taking the bald-headed gnome for a stroll in the love tunnel

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"Heard some one say I'm going to fuck you silly"

Was the reply don't call me silly, stupid !

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Rumpy or humpy- pumpy

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"We regularly had nights in the pub (omg remember those) talking rubbish and one night was silly made up terms for sex.

I think the winner was,

Taking the bald-headed gnome for a stroll in the love tunnel "

I just started laughing out loud in my living room, i had funny looks lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Rumpy or humpy- pumpy"

Ive heard rumpy pumpy lol

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

My cocks just died can i bury it in you

T

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull


"We regularly had nights in the pub (omg remember those) talking rubbish and one night was silly made up terms for sex.

I think the winner was,

Taking the bald-headed gnome for a stroll in the love tunnel

I just started laughing out loud in my living room, i had funny looks lol "

You'll have to join our pub nights you'd have a right giggle, each night someone comes up with a topic and then we just chat sh.t

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Come to pound town on the fuck truck

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Bump uglies

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"My cocks just died can i bury it in you

T"

Omg loads of giggling here, I already lost my voice from a coughing fit this morning laughing at all the comments lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Come to pound town on the fuck truck "

Definitely never heard this one lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bump uglies

"

This is a saying? Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Get your smackers round me Knackers

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Get your smackers round me Knackers "

I dont think I could take the man serious if he said this to me lol, id be on the floor laughing too much lol

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Earlier today we were having a nap, spooning and I got a hard on as normal, I woke Mrs up and said come and “dock”. she started laughing, and then I said “dock the mother ship onto the rocket” and we both just cracked up laughing....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Earlier today we were having a nap, spooning and I got a hard on as normal, I woke Mrs up and said come and “dock”. she started laughing, and then I said “dock the mother ship onto the rocket” and we both just cracked up laughing...."

Thats the same as me and my hubby this morning, he was fruity and said he wanted to plough me. I laughed so hard i decided to put a thread up

Your quote is hilarious btw

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Heard some one say I'm going to fuck you silly

Was the reply don't call me silly, stupid !"

This went over my head lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take the back doors off

Smash the granny out of you

Couple of my faves hahah

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By *uicy jonesMan
over a year ago

near a big hill in s/ shropshire NOT in

Bashing the bishop !!!! My freinds g/f said this years ago and I hadn't a clue what she meant at the time ,,,

Another I chuckle at is siphon the python

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Take the back doors off

Smash the granny out of you

Couple of my faves hahah"

Smashing the granny was the one i laughed the most

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bashing the bishop !!!! My freinds g/f said this years ago and I hadn't a clue what she meant at the time ,,,

Another I chuckle at is siphon the python "

Imagine im on my knees and a man said siphon the python, Id literally pee myself laughing and would not be able to continue lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few, kick yer back doors in

........... smash your pasty ............ hang out of the back of you ............... do you back wheels in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sausage fuck out of ya

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A few, kick yer back doors in

........... smash your pasty ............ hang out of the back of you ............... do you back wheels in "

Pasty I wont look at one the same lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Sausage fuck out of ya"

Not heard this one lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Snap the back off ya

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A good Roggering

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By *emma HoldenTV/TS
over a year ago

Ramsey

Once upon a time, I can't remember where or who by, I heard the phrase describing a black guy's cock as looking like "Marvin Hagler in a roll neck sweater". It still makes me chuckle to this day & has stuck in my mind ever since LOL.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would definitely like to give her some jelly jewellery.....to ware

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A guy once woke me up in the middle of the night and told me that his cook had died and that he wanted to bury it in me

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough


"A guy once woke me up in the middle of the night and told me that his cook had died and that he wanted to bury it in me "

At least he woke you.

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By *alking HeadMan
over a year ago

Bolton

Worst one i heard was"I'd fuck her so hard I'd break her pelvis"....I presumed he was either exagerating or he was a cyborg.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure if its been mentioned but let me feed the horse is a good one

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A good Roggering "

Think ive used this myself lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Once upon a time, I can't remember where or who by, I heard the phrase describing a black guy's cock as looking like "Marvin Hagler in a roll neck sweater". It still makes me chuckle to this day & has stuck in my mind ever since LOL. "
very good lol

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By *ewarkMarkMan
over a year ago

Waterford


"Never understood why some men want to ‘smash ya back doors in’....

Doesn’t sound like fun...."
yeah never liked that one!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A guy once woke me up in the middle of the night and told me that his cook had died and that he wanted to bury it in me "

Id slap him if he woke me up for sex pmal his willy woild definitely be no good after that lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I would definitely like to give her some jelly jewellery.....to ware "

Pmg and pmsl

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Worst one i heard was"I'd fuck her so hard I'd break her pelvis"....I presumed he was either exagerating or he was a cyborg."

Men dont exaggerate, he must have been a cyborg

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not sure if its been mentioned but let me feed the horse is a good one "

Cricky he must have been huge lol or a dreamer lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Never understood why some men want to ‘smash ya back doors in’....

Doesn’t sound like fun.... yeah never liked that one!!!"

Its said alot, think it means Im all man and can fuck you like a machine lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Hopefully I've commented on everyone who added something on here. Sorry if anyone was missed out. I tried. Threads almost full but this has been the funniest one I've done and your answers were so funny i had a coughing fit laughing so much. Thankyou all so much xx

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By *ememberTheNameMan
over a year ago

barnsley


"Never understood why some men want to ‘smash ya back doors in’....

Doesn’t sound like fun...."

I think this sounds terrible

I’ve heard lads say “ I slung one up her “

That’s pretty grim

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