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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I am going to have to burn my house down.

Woke up, went downstairs and ouch!! My foot started to feel sore. Had a look and I have a spot on the the sole of my foot, red bump with a black dot in the middle

I googled it, apparently it is a bite from either a Black Widow spider or a Brown Recluse

So the only sensible thing to do to get rid of the pesky critter is to burn the house down....

I've left instructions with POF about what to do with my dildo collection just in case I die and I will make sure there are Vol Au Vents at the bun fight.

Anyway.... That is worst case scenario, just in case.

Will keep you all updated

If I am still alive tonight we are having a party 'oop Dan Dog's allotment, Jim's marrow needs looking at

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife "

They're all over the shop boss.

I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

Stay 2 meters away , it will be fine ,spider distancing !!! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it is a black widow please let me rescue it, do not burn the house down lol

I love all spiders and want to save them all. He will go to a good home lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is why you should never google stuff kids !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife

They're all over the shop boss.

I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls "

That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Might have been my hubby, he loves Welsh girls and has a foot fetish

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If it is a black widow please let me rescue it, do not burn the house down lol

I love all spiders and want to save them all. He will go to a good home lol"

Ooh yes you can have him, I will lure him out with flies in a jam jar

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife

They're all over the shop boss.

I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls

That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs "

How do you know I don't do that anyway?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Might have been my hubby, he loves Welsh girls and has a foot fetish "

Tell him to leave me a jote next time.. poor spiders getting the blame

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/05/20 09:29:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't recommend burning the house.

Just get a bacon sarnie and leave it outside. They will swarm it then you can burn them.

Oh check your sex toys for any in there. You don't want them getting into your Juju. ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife

They're all over the shop boss.

I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls

That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs

How do you know I don't do that anyway? "

Ah so it’s you that fights crime in Wales

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldn't recommend burning the house.

Just get a bacon sarnie and leave it outside. They will swarm it then you can burn them.

Oh check your sex toys for any in there. You don't want them getting into your Juju. ??"

I can't hurt it Pink Foxy Lady would kill me, I shall put the bacon sardine in a jam jar, that'll stop him getting in my juju. Thanks boss

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"That’s me never going to wales again if black widows are rife

They're all over the shop boss.

I blame the dodgy banana's I got from Lidls

That’s what happened to Spider-Man, you might become a crime fighter that swings from building to building using your webs

How do you know I don't do that anyway?

Ah so it’s you that fights crime in Wales "

Shhhhh, nobody is supposed to know

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.

If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.

I suspect it isn't

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.

If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.

I suspect it isn't "

Oh Granny, thank goodness you're here. I love how you keep me so grounded

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury


"Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.

If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.

I suspect it isn't "

Good advice!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous."

Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I be in the house while you burn it? I wanna prove to people I’m fireproof

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury


"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.

Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?"

Asleep probably

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Can I be in the house while you burn it? I wanna prove to people I’m fireproof"

I'm not burning now, apparently it wasn't a spider. My foot is sore, ypu can come and do something with it if you don't mind

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.

Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?

Asleep probably "

Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it’s a Brown Recluse then say goodbye to your foot. Maybe not now but at some random point in the future when it reactivates

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

You sure it’s not just a verruca? Check first before lighting the petrol

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury


"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.

Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?

Asleep probably

Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep "

Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If it’s a Brown Recluse then say goodbye to your foot. Maybe not now but at some random point in the future when it reactivates "

Ooh I'll look for that

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You sure it’s not just a verruca? Check first before lighting the petrol "

Verruca you say? Ooh off to google again

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.

Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?

Asleep probably

Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep

Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis "

Ok ok, *hides drama llama*

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury


"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.

Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?

Asleep probably

Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep

Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis

Ok ok, *hides drama llama* "

Hopefully it wont start munching on your linin

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I wouldnt use google to diagnose it myself, that's as bad as self diagnosis with webMD. Its probably something far more common and nondangerous.

Another voice of reason, where were you in my time of crisis?

Asleep probably

Great, here I am having the biggest existential crisis ever and you're asleep

Sounds like you need a reality check if this is what causes you to have an existential crisis

Ok ok, *hides drama llama*

Hopefully it wont start munching on your linin "

I'll tell you if he does

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

A spider? Move out immediately, don’t take chances .. yucky, scary devils they are. You need to leave your possessions and run for the hills! Or hop if your foot is sore

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

could be worse

i remember the time i woke up and my arse was sore

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

Dreavus are you dead yet ?

Which one of you lot is going to suck her foot ?

I'm not. I'm having a Miso .......

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ


"Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.

If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.

I suspect it isn't "

It could have been a Black Widow that had lost a scrap with a rival gang member and only had one fang

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shall I come and rescue you

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Dreavus are you dead yet ?

Which one of you lot is going to suck her foot ?

I'm not. I'm having a Miso ....... "

Not yet Granny... just about hanging on.... Aw you properly look after me

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Shall I come and rescue you "

Yes please, my foot needs sucking, well whatever that thing is on my foot needs sucking.

You're a true mate you are

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Black widow tends to leave two fang marks and you'd feel very ill within half an hour or so.

If you do think it's Black widow contact your doctor now.

I suspect it isn't

It could have been a Black Widow that had lost a scrap with a rival gang member and only had one fang "

Yes it could of, we cannot rule out these things. We need to be prepared for all eventualities

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A spider? Move out immediately, don’t take chances .. yucky, scary devils they are. You need to leave your possessions and run for the hills! Or hop if your foot is sore "

Good plan, can you let me know when it is safe please Babs

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

There are lots of false widows around they give a nasty bite but are not poisonous thankfully..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spiders and dildos in the same thread..... 10

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Spiders and dildos in the same thread..... 10 "

You know me Nippy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spiders and dildos in the same thread..... 10

You know me Nippy "

Knew*

You're all loved up with lumpy feet now innit

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

More likely to be a False Widow, as has been said.

If it were a Black Widow, there’s a chance you wouldn’t be typing your post. If it were a Brown Recluse, you’d probably want to be finding your way to a hospital......volcano lesions aren’t pleasant.

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