FabSwingers.com forum: Should one Dom respect another Dom?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So I’ve found myself in this situation and as I’m a sub in training would like to know what people thought on this?

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"So I’ve found myself in this situation and as I’m a sub in training would like to know what people thought on this? "

I'm not sure what you mean, can you expand on the question?

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By *wickermanMan
over a year ago

Staines

"So I’ve found myself in this situation and as I’m a sub in training would like to know what people thought on this? "

Define respect.

If you mean not trying to engage with another Dom/mes sub, belittle them or interfere in their existing relationship, for me the answer is yes.

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By *uriousKinksterMan
over a year ago

Loughborough

"So I’ve found myself in this situation and as I’m a sub in training would like to know what people thought on this? "

Respect is earned, irrespective of dominance. If anyone tries to assert dominance without consent, I'd lose a lot of respect for them as people, let alone as a kinkster.

In life we're all equal, but in kink the sub is the one holding the real power.

But a more direct answer to your question is that I personally respect a Dom who is considered, knowledgeable, and receptive to the different lifestyles people lead.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

I'm not sure what you mean. Are you saying you have two doms?

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By *ulahlollipopWoman
over a year ago

Reading/London

More detail needed- what’s the specific situation??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

If one Dom is aware that you are owned should he respect your master and not pursue you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm not sure what you mean. Are you saying you have two doms? "
no only my master

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm not sure what you mean. Are you saying you have two doms? "
no only my master. But in a situation where a current Dom is not respecting my master.

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By *uriousKinksterMan
over a year ago

Loughborough

"If one Dom is aware that you are owned should he respect your master and not pursue you? "

Yes. This would be an enormous red flag for me and I wouldn't even consider engaging that person.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Two Doms don’t make a right

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"Two Doms don’t make a right "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If one Dom is aware that you are owned should he respect your master and not pursue you? "

Surely the respectful thing for the pursuing Dom to do is engage in dialog your master, no?

Fuzz

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"If one Dom is aware that you are owned should he respect your master and not pursue you? "

OK gotcha. Well in my opinion he should respect YOU, and not pursue you if you've told him not to. Block him if that's the case.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"Two Doms don’t make a right "

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"More detail needed- what’s the specific situation??"
i currently have my master whom I met on here. But another as come along to collar me as he thinks I am not owned which I am most definitely am. Yet he continues to belittle my master on how he does things with his sub

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If one Dom is aware that you are owned should he respect your master and not pursue you?

OK gotcha. Well in my opinion he should respect YOU, and not pursue you if you've told him not to. Block him if that's the case. "
thank you x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If one Dom is aware that you are owned should he respect your master and not pursue you?

Surely the respectful thing for the pursuing Dom to do is engage in dialog your master, no?

Fuzz"
this was my thought also

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By *ulahlollipopWoman
over a year ago

Reading/London

"More detail needed- what’s the specific situation??i currently have my master whom I met on here. But another as come along to collar me as he thinks I am not owned which I am most definitely am. Yet he continues to belittle my master on how he does things with his sub "

Doesn’t really sound like he fully understands the dynamic tbh- block him, he’s a pretender lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Second dom is being disrespectful to your dynamic

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By *asterslittlewhoreCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Yes i recently blocked someone for similiar

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Second dom is being disrespectful to your dynamic"
thank you. I just needed other views on this as I am new to this. X

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By *uriousKinksterMan
over a year ago

Loughborough

Doesn’t really sound like he fully understands the dynamic tbh- block him, he’s a pretender lol"

This ^

So many 'Doms' lead with the whole "if you were a real dub you'd do as I say, because I'm a Dom"

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By *mnipotent_BehemothMan
over a year ago

near Merry Hill shopping centre

Having read this unless the relationship is abusive and something needs saying, due respect should be offered to the other Dom, I have been in a position in the past as some with a lot of experience and history on the scene, where a word had to had as someone was dangerous. I don’t play in public anymore as the whole 50 shades wannabes got on my nerves and the etiquette was being forgot.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Doesn’t really sound like he fully understands the dynamic tbh- block him, he’s a pretender lol

This ^

So many 'Doms' lead with the whole "if you were a real dub you'd do as I say, because I'm a Dom"

"
i agree yes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No dominate him you pussy

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

It seems like bad form, but I would say that you could shut the situation down and tell the other chap to keep out of your relationship. Just because you are sub to one man, doesn't mean that you should ne dominated by anyone who tries... submission is a choice.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you my lovely this is very true

Cal"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No dominate him you pussy

"
i am not a leader lol

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By *egularFunMan
over a year ago

...

If he's belittling the man you gave the gift of your submission to, how much respect do you think he'll have for you? Does your Master actually know what's going on here? I assume you've told the second guy you are owned? If he's aware that you are, but is choosing to ignore the fact then he's clearly best avoided and you need to block and move on.

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"So I’ve found myself in this situation and as I’m a sub in training would like to know what people thought on this? "

I'll be blunt

You do realise as the sub you are in charge ?

If not erm

So I'll reiterate there should never be a conflict you control the situation

If it becomes a shit fest cock fight it will be your fault

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So I’ve found myself in this situation and as I’m a sub in training would like to know what people thought on this?

I'll be blunt

You do realise as the sub you are in charge ?

If not erm

So I'll reiterate there should never be a conflict you control the situation

If it becomes a shit fest cock fight it will be your fault "
oh really? I think I understand thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the world of BDSM all Doms should respect each, if a Dom knows you are collared then he should not even get in touch with you especially without going through your Dom first.

If he's not doing this he's not respecting either of you and isnt genuine. If you are on "FL" its usually states on your profile that your owned/collared and nearly everyone on there follows the correct Etiquette. Plus your Dom should know and deal with this other bloke lovely x

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By *essie.Woman
over a year ago

Serendipity

"In the world of BDSM all Doms should respect each, if a Dom knows you are collared then he should not even get in touch with you especially without going through your Dom first.

This is spot on.

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By *adyA01Woman
over a year ago

Wellington

In all honesty, the only thing that is needed here is common sense...

So what if you are new to being a sub...

If you are committed to one man, which apparently you are, you wouldn't even be entertaining the conversation with this other guy...

To me this situation of a guy trying to butt in is no different to normal life...

Block the guy, which ultimately will show your respect to your Master... He shouldn't have to deal with this for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In all honesty, the only thing that is needed here is common sense...

So what if you are new to being a sub...

If you are committed to one man, which apparently you are, you wouldn't even be entertaining the conversation with this other guy...

To me this situation of a guy trying to butt in is no different to normal life...

Block the guy, which ultimately will show your respect to your Master... He shouldn't have to deal with this for you."

A lot of the trouble is BDSM etiquette and culture has disappeared so far up its own ass , its difficult for new bees to understand what is right or wrong . Its cloaked now in so many " mustdoisms or thatsnotrightisms its losing all resemblance of what it started out as

Bdsm, kink , fetish what ever you want to call it runs parallel to real life not off at some crazy tangent . If someone is getting on your threpenny bits , As the above poster said " common sense " delete and block ...

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Take the whole D/s thing out of it for a second OP - in a "normal" relationship if you were with someone and were approached by another guy that would be considered disrespectful to the guy you were with wouldn't it?

No difference if you add D/s into the equation

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

Erm

I'll say again

He's just a man

Being a man

You have the control it's called the block button

Whilst you dont press it you are enjoying the attention

No dom has to respect any other some doms are utter twats

Some humans play games try their luck some do not

This is internet land

Whether you are collored or not is irrelevant here

You either like and want the attention from this man

Or you block

It's not a predicament or a sub dom thing

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

Oh and what I meant by

" no dom has to"

All humans should respect others simple

We know they dont

The wannabe dom is doing no more or less than a normal man

He should respect boundaries he can try it on he can be a cock you can block

Life can be simple x

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

[Removed by poster at 19/04/20 09:59:38]

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I would not respect anyone who tells me they “own” another person. I’m naturally Dom, it’s not something that’s turned on and off in the bedroom, and part of that is when you want someone or something you generally make it happen, some people view that as disrespect but it’s just competition. I’ve played with other Doms and respect comes down to what they are like as a person not whether they are a Dom or not.

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

Genuine question. If you have a master who sounds possessive. Why are you on fab? If he owns you. Wouldn't he be the one who finds the other people to fuck you? I don't know anything about this master relationship so curious to know. Thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have the true power as a sub. Simple solution. Block the idiot who has clearly no understanding of your relationship.

Empower yourself with the simple action .. you are no obliged to talk to anyone you choose not to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people should respect people

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

Remove all dom aspects for a moment..

Anyone approaching you should be finding out what your situation is. If you're saying you're already owned and not playing. He should back off.

Just because you are in a dom/sub situation, it doesn't mean that you can't have normal conversations and make your own decisions. Especially at the start, your dynamics need to be consensual.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like others in this thread I am seeing a few red flags here. If you are looking for a scenario where you are dominated by two men, this can work, but in my experience the men would need to get to know each other and be respectful of each other without competition. It is also normally evident in situations like this and in the throes of passion with whom your allegiance lies! Good luck in finding your way xx

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

"If one Dom is aware that you are owned should he respect your master and not pursue you? "

He should respect you if you've told him you have a dom.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn’t ever persue a sub that is in a dynamic, even if they were both actively looking for a 2nd Dom to join.

I have too much respect for dynamics and would expect other people to show the same respect for the dynamic I was in.

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By *DW1983Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen, Leeds, Sheffield

As someone else said, forget the D/s dynamic for a second, its basic respect. You have a relationship, and the new guy is trying to ruin it in the hope of getting his way. That's not ok in any situation.

As far as D/s goes, you have the power. The sub always has the power to say no.

The new guy might call himself a Dom but he's not your Dom. There's an important difference. Submission is earned, its not something he can just come along and take.

I don't know if this is something you're exploring as a 'newbie' or if you're an experienced member of the kink scene, so apologies if I'm stating the obvious, but if not there are plenty of local kink groups and events (when allowed!), it might be good to get into the scene more, speak to experienced subs and Doms and get to know more about best practice. Respecting others's boundaries, dynamics and consent are key.

Sorry for the long message, PM me if you want to chat more.

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By *angtidy42Couple
over a year ago

Redditch

There can only be one DOM, all others are sub.

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By *ensualbicockMan
over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

What happened to Dick ?

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