FabSwingers.com forum: Married. Seperated. My story

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Firstly can i ask . if a married man cheats hes called a lying hatefull bas@@@d who deserves to have his balls cut off.. But if a married woman cheats well yes she will receive some condemnation something along the lines of ..well she done wrong but you dont know whats happening in their lives ... Why the difference ... I actually knew my wife was playing the field for a couple of years but i done nothing ..i did not want to rock the family boat so i kept my mouth shut . a friend told me i was mad and should end it but i dident listen to him . but one of the men she was seeing not only had a buldge in his trowsers but had a very large buldge in his wallet.. She liked that .. Apparently im too dosile and laid back and not dominant ..which yes is true . so she can have mr fucking shades of gray ...sorry fifty ... So here i am left sitting in my appartment a sad old lonly man . hence i came to fab . i know this post is not going to do me any favours but in a way it is . as i see it written down here and read it . it kinda gets it off my chest a little ... Im now seperated by the way ... Advice too married people ... Play away cos 30 years of marrage counts for f@*k all .. Really sorry to unload that but thank you for reading ... Love you all

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By *un_guy_69Man
over a year ago

Limerick/Tipperary border

Hey there,

Sorry to hear about you break up. You have as much right to unload about things like that as others already do on other topics. But unfortunately things change and I know that doesn't take away the pain and hurt of a break up. But you are probably better off moving on and if fab helps then great.

My advise is keep talking to people about how you are feeling and the pain will lessen over time. I wish you luck here. You sound like a good guy so I'm sure you will get into things here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nothing wrong with a good vent xx

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By *elfastreal8Man
over a year ago

belfast

Keep the chin up bud. Men get it rough too even though you’re expected to man up and hold it all in. Once they get bored of each other it’ll all come crashing down.

My ex did the same. Then when I finally left she spread rumours about me and blamed me on treating her badly (which I really didn’t do). We’ve all been through shit. You come out the other side a lot better if you find something you enjoy and stick at it. Look after yourself bud. Men have the right to let loose as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well welcome to Fab.......

The good news is this probably wont be the last rant on here tonight

That sounds like a bad situation. But as others have said you are out the other end of it now.

Fab is a place of possibilites so you may be feeling down now but there are always chances for new oppertunities and connections

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

Would it be correct that you stayed in your marriage for the sake of a stable front for your kids and it was only once they could stand on their own that you separated?

I think that you will find there are a lot in similar circumstances and I do hope that the majority of the comments are supportive, as it's always a boon to find out you are not alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Theres no madness in trying to keep a family together and I commend you for that, I'm not here to judge your wife either it's just life and that's shit, we all have our reasons...chin up pal

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you everyone for your kind support and your private messages . it really makes me feel better

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By *he English OneMan
over a year ago

west

"Firstly can i ask . if a married man cheats hes called a lying hatefull bas@@@d who deserves to have his balls cut off.. But if a married woman cheats well yes she will receive some condemnation something along the lines of ..well she done wrong but you dont know whats happening in their lives ... Why the difference ... I actually knew my wife was playing the field for a couple of years but i done nothing ..i did not want to rock the family boat so i kept my mouth shut . a friend told me i was mad and should end it but i dident listen to him . but one of the men she was seeing not only had a buldge in his trowsers but had a very large buldge in his wallet.. She liked that .. Apparently im too dosile and laid back and not dominant ..which yes is true . so she can have mr fucking shades of gray ...sorry fifty ... So here i am left sitting in my appartment a sad old lonly man . hence i came to fab . i know this post is not going to do me any favours but in a way it is . as i see it written down here and read it . it kinda gets it off my chest a little ... Im now seperated by the way ... Advice too married people ... Play away cos 30 years of marrage counts for f@*k all .. Really sorry to unload that but thank you for reading ... Love you all"

I know what your feeling man I have only come out of a similar situation January last year but didn't go on as long as yours did it hurts still a bit and what makes it worse is I've had to leave my 4 kids behind but I am glad I ended it like couples fight all the time but the biggest disrespect is sleeping with other people behind their partners back weather they know or not its wrong up or down and for me no one should take that crap all I say is if the relationship isn't working for godsake at least finish it before jumping into someone else's bed I think I'm in the right place here due to my circumstances once I mention I have 4 kids the ladies on the dating sites run for the hills lol so here I am I know it won't be easy to move on but it will eventually hopefully life do be kind to you

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

Photo hasn't been approved yet but you might be able to view it here

https://m.fabswingers.com/my/show/bf633c5a-c9f3-40c8-811d-40202e2de93d

Take a close look at the mirror steel

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By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

Shes fucked.

She will end up going from jealous controlling man to jealous controlling man. They can dress it up as kink and bdsm all they want, but 90% of the men out there preying on them women are just control freaks.

The fetish scene is warning people to stop going to some socials because they were outed as letting abusers prey on women at them. There are posts from women on the fetish scene saying that they knew the man they were with was an abuser and they did nothing about it. Sure even the guy who murdered the girl in the mountains was active on the fetish scene, it was after the womans body was found that members of the fetish scene got in touch with cops that he might be worth a look.

If i know the fetish scene, she will end up having to watch him fuck loads of women, sit by and take it, end up controlled and unhappy, end up braking up with him, and now no decent guy will want her. They would have seen the patethic men she let climb on top of her and beat her to keep the rich guy happy.

Anyway i forgot what i was saying.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Big thank you OP for sharing the point of view of one who has been cheated on.

All tech savvy 007 cheaters, all ones, who always have an excuse and complain about how the world is judging them.

Here it is. Written in black and while the pure emotion of a person who has experienced what it's like to know that something is off, to know that one, who should be standing next to them side by side is rubbing their front with someone else.

Being honest with a person, who should matter the most, even a person who used to matter the most, but clearly isn't the main priority any more is the most grown up thing to do.

Yes, adrenaline can be addictive, but there's other ways of getting that adrenaline. When was the last time you went out of your way to genuinely excite your partner (not in a sexual way, just genuinely excite them about something)?

Sexless relationships usually come from boredom and routine.

You need an escape and distraction? Do you genuinely think your partner doesn't?

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By *mokey and the bandit 1Couple
over a year ago

Dublin

You can vent all you want but let's be honest if you and your partner are off shagging other people behind each others back it's over between each of you. Cut your losses and walk away

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

I'm so sorry that's an awful situation. I know what its like as a man to find yourself alone and out of the family home and its horribly isolating. What I would say is this place WILL NOT HELP. It will just make you feel worse about yourself as its so hard for single males here. Join a mens shed, a meetup group, or a college evening course. Something that will help you grow in confidence and improve yourself. Fab is not the place for you.

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"I'm so sorry that's an awful situation. I know what its like as a man to find yourself alone and out of the family home and its horribly isolating. What I would say is this place WILL NOT HELP. It will just make you feel worse about yourself as its so hard for single males here. Join a mens shed, a meetup group, or a college evening course. Something that will help you grow in confidence and improve yourself. Fab is not the place for you."

I respectfully disagree to be honest.

I'm still in the family home for a couple of reasons to do with the kids.

I'm married 29 years and its totally down the drain.

I'm not trying to compete with the men on here

(being honest how could I)

But the forums have helped me talk to women again for the first time in 34 years and some of the women on here are great to be fair.

I've felt like a normal bloke instead of a cash machine and it feels

Wonderful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I respectfully disagree to be honest.

I'm still in the family home for a couple of reasons to do with the kids.

I'm married 29 years and its totally down the drain.

I'm not trying to compete with the men on here

(being honest how could I)

But the forums have helped me talk to women again for the first time in 34 years and some of the women on here are great to be fair.

I've felt like a normal bloke instead of a cash machine and it feels

Wonderful.

Ya I have to disagree too here.

I do agree with FN about joining a Mens Shed and other activities. But that doesnt mean you cant have an outlet on fab too.

Dont have expectations of a meet and treat it as a social outlet an actual meet will be a major bonus then.

Its all about approach and expectations

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

Welcome to the mad house of fab, OP. Your introductory is a bit more than we need to know but hey it's grand if it helps you to get it off your chest. You're not an old man, there's plenty of time to restart and enjoy the fruits of live. And hopefully soon you'll find it was all for the better to finish a long broken non functioning relationship.

Just a note: women who cheat are called all sorts of names, unlike you describe it above.

Good luck and happy fabbing!

And a note to all moralising peeps on here, remember there's always two or even three sides to a story.

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By *ohnsmithMan
over a year ago

South Tipperary

"Welcome to the mad house of fab, OP. Your introductory is a bit more than we need to know but hey it's grand if it helps you to get it off your chest. You're not an old man, there's plenty of time to restart and enjoy the fruits of live. And hopefully soon you'll find it was all for the better to finish a long broken non functioning relationship.

Just a note: women who cheat are called all sorts of names, unlike you describe it above.

Good luck and happy fabbing!

And a note to all moralising peeps on here, remember there's always two or even three sides to a story. "

Well said. Keep that head up op.... TALK IS GREAT....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find bitching about exes is probably the most unattractive thing a man or woman can do. Sorry for what you're going through but personally, I'd keep the bitterness and anger off the forums.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one knows what goes in behind closed doors and noone has the right to judge someone's else's life choices. If people have an issue with you venting here let them off I'd sooner see someone vent or rant here than they bottle their emotions up and done something irreversible. Op , head up hold your heart together and hopefully you feel better soon.

Noone and I mean noone has a right to judge anyone on this site or in life.

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By *he English OneMan
over a year ago

west

"No one knows what goes in behind closed doors and noone has the right to judge someone's else's life choices. If people have an issue with you venting here let them off I'd sooner see someone vent or rant here than they bottle their emotions up and done something irreversible. Op , head up hold your heart together and hopefully you feel better soon.

Noone and I mean noone has a right to judge anyone on this site or in life.

I guess this thread is better than reading the usual "why can't I get a meet" or "can someone help me get a meet" or something along them lines lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been meeting up with bored horny married women for sex ever since I was fifteen years old. My shenanigans with these women gave me a unique perspective and woke me up to just how fickle and capricious female nature can be. So much so, I never married, never made a meaningful commitment to a woman and had a vasectomy done in the UK while in my early twenties.

I can certainly empathize with your situation, as I have witnessed lots of really good guys end up alone and bitter living in dingy apartments drinking themselves to an early death, when their wives kicked them to the kerb because they fancied a change. All of these guys were dutiful beta male providers, who worked their asses off for thirty years to provide a decent lifestyle for their children and ungrateful wives who just always wanted MORE!

The MGTOW movement is growing- (Men who go their own way) Men who live meaningful lives pursuing their own dreams goals and ambitions, without falling into the marriage trap.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, just leave your bitterness and resentment in the past where it belongs and move forward.

Hope this helps..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Welcome to the 1st day of the rest of your life, you're free now & I hope you have lots of well deserved fun OP, Onwards & Upwards for you, Best Wishes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've been meeting up with bored horny married women for sex ever since I was fifteen years old. My shenanigans with these women gave me a unique perspective and woke me up to just how fickle and capricious female nature can be. So much so, I never married, never made a meaningful commitment to a woman and had a vasectomy done in the UK while in my early twenties.

The MGTOW movement is growing- (Men who go their own way) Men who live meaningful lives pursuing their own dreams goals and ambitions, without falling into the marriage trap.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, just leave your bitterness and resentment in the past where it belongs and move forward.

Hope this helps.. "

I cannot.

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

The MGTOW movement is growing- (Men who go their own way) Men who live meaningful lives pursuing their own dreams goals and ambitions, without falling into the marriage trap.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, just leave your bitterness and resentment in the past where it belongs and move forward.

Hope this helps.. "

But you had no problem fucking those 'ungrateful' wives.

Ahh sure reading this it's no wonder Adam and Eve have been thrown out of paradise, we women are no good....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The not dominant part may not be true. As you kept alpha and holding the family. My hats off to you man. Your story is of pure strength and good heart. Look, who am I to give you advices. But carry on and find your other fun sides it is worth

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

Never heard of this MGTOW stuff so I had a Google.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men_Going_Their_Own_Way

Seems to be a bunch of anti-feminist, male supremacy, misogynist, alt-right bullshit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never heard of this MGTOW stuff so I had a Google.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men_Going_Their_Own_Way

Seems to be a bunch of anti-feminist, male supremacy, misogynist, alt-right bullshit.

Just because I've been cute enough to avoid slaving my guts out for some ungrateful woman for the last thirty years, it doesn't automatically mean I'm an alt-right male supremacist.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never heard of this MGTOW stuff so I had a Google.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men_Going_Their_Own_Way

Seems to be a bunch of anti-feminist, male supremacy, misogynist, alt-right bullshit.

Just because I've been cute enough to avoid slaving my guts out for some ungrateful woman for the last thirty years, it doesn't automatically mean I'm an alt-right male supremacist.

Glad you didn't try to deny the misogyny

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford

The MGTOW movement is growing- (Men who go their own way) Men who live meaningful lives pursuing their own dreams goals and ambitions, without falling into the marriage trap.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, just leave your bitterness and resentment in the past where it belongs and move forward.

Hope this helps.. "

oookkkaaaayyyy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The MGTOW movement is growing- (Men who go their own way) Men who live meaningful lives pursuing their own dreams goals and ambitions, without falling into the marriage trap.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life, just leave your bitterness and resentment in the past where it belongs and move forward.

Hope this helps..

oookkkaaaayyyy"

I want to see the story of these men at their 75s 80s 90s alone in a elder home without a beloved one to look after them. Yes separation happen, but to a minority. I wish that it never ever happened to anyone at all... But Better not going into details... But yes, this man need all our support to succeed...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never heard of this MGTOW stuff so I had a Google.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men_Going_Their_Own_Way

Seems to be a bunch of anti-feminist, male supremacy, misogynist, alt-right bullshit.

Just because I've been cute enough to avoid slaving my guts out for some ungrateful woman for the last thirty years, it doesn't automatically mean I'm an alt-right male supremacist.

Glad you didn't try to deny the misogyny

No I'm not a misogynist, I really enjoy female company and I've met some incredible women on my travels over years. I've just never had any desire to get married and have children, and after reading the OP's tale of woe, I'm sure glad I didn't.

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By *sLittleRedRidingHoodWoman
over a year ago

Magical Forrest

Well ... theres also the female version to that story ... the one where the woman kept her mouth shut for years... till one day she couldn't take her husbands infidelities anymore and she left... the now ex husband married the Last (younger) woman and they live happily ever after... as for the female in this story ... she doesn't live in an apartment... she has her own castle and kicks ass in life... loving life... fucks whoever she wants... still believes in love and amazing sex... believes in what goes round comes around... doesnt need to vent on a swinger site... that's what the marriage counselor was for... or friends... no sob story here...

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"Well ... theres also the female version to that story ... the one where the woman kept her mouth shut for years... till one day she couldn't take her husbands infidelities anymore and she left... the now ex husband married the Last (younger) woman and they live happily ever after... as for the female in this story ... she doesn't live in an apartment... she has her own castle and kicks ass in life... loving life... fucks whoever she wants... still believes in love and amazing sex... believes in what goes round comes around... doesnt need to vent on a swinger site... that's what the marriage counselor was for... or friends... no sob story here...

Congratulations on being that woman

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

"Never heard of this MGTOW stuff so I had a Google.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men_Going_Their_Own_Way

Seems to be a bunch of anti-feminist, male supremacy, misogynist, alt-right bullshit.

Just because I've been cute enough to avoid slaving my guts out for some ungrateful woman for the last thirty years, it doesn't automatically mean I'm an alt-right male supremacist.

You're right it doesnt.. it's your self proclaimed membership to a group that believes this stuff that does.

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By *ilthyNightsCouple
over a year ago

East / North, Cork

Plus these days a man doesnt slog his guts out FOR a woman. Most families have both partners working. They work together for a shared future... the days of the male hunter gatherer providing for his mate are long gone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Plus these days a man doesnt slog his guts out FOR a woman. Most families have both partners working. They work together for a shared future... the days of the male hunter gatherer providing for his mate are long gone. "

No no, you're confused. Clearly you've been reading those feminist manifestos again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I've had my fair share of naughty morning fun with women, after they returned from the school run in the enormous new SUV their beta male provider husbands paid for. I've also had several flings with career women who's husbands just lost interest in sex. Thankfully I don't suffer from jealousy issues- People like to fuck, it's just human nature I guess... Not judging, just saying like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seems pretty judge to me. But sure how would I know. I've no beta male provider to tell me what my opinion is

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford

Still wondering how a man providing for his wife and family is considered "beta".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think one COULD tell you what to do ducky lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t think one COULD tell you what to do ducky lol "

He could try

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bahahhaha

Well I know that

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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Hate when conversations get taken over trying to prove that women are bitches just out for new SUV's and sex or that the men are hunter gatherers

My wife was the stronest of the 2 of us and the rock of the family,the mother of my children and I loved her with all my heart.

We both changed and after 7 years of no relationship I decided to join here to get confidence back

I'm still married,I still live in the family home but its big enough to live separately and the fighting stopped which is good for us and the kids.

Everyone is different but if there's one thing I finally learned in all my years its who am I to judge anyone in life or on here,married or single

Just try to be happy as you only get one life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This!!!

Bravo!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So so many of you people to say thank you too here and for all the private messages . ireally am taken back . and i will also take on board all of your advice . . and i mean everyone .. . i just treat fab at the moment like an adult facebook it is actualy the ideal way too do it ... Upwards and onwards

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its wonderful to see how supportive Fab can be...so many (men & women) can empathise with this story.

as has been said there are many sides to a relationship & the story of that relationship.

you can only live your life for you & not as others may wish.

I wish the OP every happiness in the future.

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