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"How highly do you value yourself? Reading the forums there seems to be such a mix bag of people, some who are confident and aren’t afraid to ask for what they want, which I read as them being happy in their own skin and believing themselves worthy. Then there are others who seem to be so much less so and maybe don’t believe they are entitled to the same levels of joy and happiness as others and I wonder why that might be? Why is it some people value themselves more highly then others?" I am deeply in love with myself As to why? I would say a huge amount of factors.. how you were raised, mental health, current life situations, your circle of friends and family...... I think we also all go through highs and lows in our own valuations of ourselves at times | |||
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"Self confidence You either have it or you don't I don't" Exactly this,i do believe some people have alot more self confidence than others. I know for myself looking through some profiles there are some i wont message or interact with because i dont see the point in wasting their time because i know we are not gonna be to everyones liking,i also dont like to put myself out there much just to be told your flaws. Mrs Hld | |||
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"So much has to do with what is learnt from our parents I guess. I grew up in a home where no ambition was considered too lofty or unattainable. It was only when I grew to adulthood that I realised my parents were possibly “a little” biased!! " I agree with this, and a lot of parents I think are guilty of constantly pressuring belittling or criticising children. It's not that they don't love them, it's a fear of outside judgement stemming from their own insecurities. I don't think that praising them to the high heavens is a good idea either, but don't forget to applaud the positives. Too often we only give feedback when it is negative. For a child this creates an inner voice continually telling them that they're not good enough. It took me decades to silence that voice gifted to me by my upbringing. | |||
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"Let me ask you this. Do you think some people are out of your league?" Out of my league no. Some people arw just playing a different sport that will never gel | |||
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"Let me ask you this. Do you think some people are out of your league?" Dunno who the question is directed at but in strict physical terms, yes there are loads of people on here who are well and truly out of my league but that’s ok, I’m a realist | |||
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"Let me ask you this. Do you think some people are out of your league? Dunno who the question is directed at but in strict physical terms, yes there are loads of people on here who are well and truly out of my league but that’s ok, I’m a realist " it's an open question. Anyone can answer it. | |||
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"Let me ask you this. Do you think some people are out of your league? Dunno who the question is directed at but in strict physical terms, yes there are loads of people on here who are well and truly out of my league but that’s ok, I’m a realist " Just to be clear it doesn’t stop me chancing my arm anyway | |||
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"If they valued themselves they wouldn't be here sleeping around to make themselves feel good whilst falling in love n becoming obsessed with every second guy they meet. The men sre just here because they are horn bags that will fuck anything " A very broad statment based on what reality ??? The "they" you refer to is i presume women. I think you need to look at yourself and maybe allow all of us women speak for ourselves. | |||
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"If they valued themselves they wouldn't be here sleeping around to make themselves feel good whilst falling in love n becoming obsessed with every second guy they meet. The men sre just here because they are horn bags that will fuck anything " I most certainly won't fuck anything but you are right, alot of men will just for a realese. "Every holes a goal". | |||
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"If they valued themselves they wouldn't be here sleeping around to make themselves feel good whilst falling in love n becoming obsessed with every second guy they meet. The men sre just here because they are horn bags that will fuck anything I most certainly won't fuck anything but you are right, alot of men will just for a realese. "Every holes a goal"." He’s far from right though on his assumption about women. | |||
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"If they valued themselves they wouldn't be here sleeping around to make themselves feel good whilst falling in love n becoming obsessed with every second guy they meet. The men sre just here because they are horn bags that will fuck anything " Slight correction there my friend, I’m only here cos I’m a horn bag (though in my defence I wouldn’t fuck anything ), I just wish the needy men wouldn’t keep falling in love with me! MsB x | |||
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"If they valued themselves they wouldn't be here sleeping around to make themselves feel good whilst falling in love n becoming obsessed with every second guy they meet. The men sre just here because they are horn bags that will fuck anything I most certainly won't fuck anything but you are right, alot of men will just for a realese. "Every holes a goal". He’s far from right though on his assumption about women. " wouldn't agree with his first part | |||
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"If they valued themselves they wouldn't be here sleeping around to make themselves feel good whilst falling in love n becoming obsessed with every second guy they meet. The men sre just here because they are horn bags that will fuck anything Slight correction there my friend, I’m only here cos I’m a horn bag (though in my defence I wouldn’t fuck anything ), I just wish the needy men wouldn’t keep falling in love with me! MsB x" No sorry Ms you clearly are deeply unhappy and trying to fill the love hole with cock.... Still love ya though | |||
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"No sorry Ms you clearly are deeply unhappy and trying to fill the love hole with cock.... Still love ya though " I refer you to my earlier post... I will continue to chance my arm to that end | |||
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"So much has to do with what is learnt from our parents I guess. I grew up in a home where no ambition was considered too lofty or unattainable. It was only when I grew to adulthood that I realised my parents were possibly “a little” biased!! I agree with this, and a lot of parents I think are guilty of constantly pressuring belittling or criticising children. It's not that they don't love them, it's a fear of outside judgement stemming from their own insecurities. I don't think that praising them to the high heavens is a good idea either, but don't forget to applaud the positives. Too often we only give feedback when it is negative. For a child this creates an inner voice continually telling them that they're not good enough. It took me decades to silence that voice gifted to me by my upbringing." I can relate to this on so many levels | |||
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"Self worth can definitely be learned. Sure, the easter bunny/santa/god/becoming an astronaut is a crushing lie to deal with growing up. If people make you feel shit, move on. Counselling has lost its stigma, benefit from it! I could barely pick up a telephone and then I was forced by the dole to work in a radio station and ended up with my own show. I was TRAINED to be confident. Swinging has been amazing too, I never realised I had a magic touch until a few steaming hot women had told me! " Self worth can be learned ..it has to be learned and if your wise you'll learn and use every tool available to you. Your right, you train your mind to believe in yourself and when your mind knows your actions will follow | |||
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" People who value themselves, usually have a positive outlook on life which is very attractive." It sure is! When you first meet another couple and you get that vibe it's powerful. Essential really. | |||
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"How highly do you value yourself? Reading the forums there seems to be such a mix bag of people, some who are confident and aren’t afraid to ask for what they want, which I read as them being happy in their own skin and believing themselves worthy. Then there are others who seem to be so much less so and maybe don’t believe they are entitled to the same levels of joy and happiness as others and I wonder why that might be? Why is it some people value themselves more highly then others?" Its very hard to be confident in this society. Our beauty standards are so unbelievably unrealistic and social media has completely fucked wuth our ideas of reality. I think some people are lucky enough to be naturally confident and somehow immune to all of that. Some of us have to work hard every single day to love ourselves and maintain a strong sense of self worth. Totally worth the effort of course, but it's not easy. | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook." I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook." would agree wholeheartedly, it's no surprise that a huge proportion of young adults now are suffering from anxiety and depression, constantly feeling under scrutiny and comparing oneself to others is very damaging. | |||
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" I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. " Fair point. Perhaps if you're in a good space it's easier to use it as a tool like that?? I personally found it just created a delusional bubble in the fields I'm interested in. And used up a lot of time, like this forum! | |||
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" I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. Fair point. Perhaps if you're in a good space it's easier to use it as a tool like that?? I personally found it just created a delusional bubble in the fields I'm interested in. And used up a lot of time, like this forum!" Yeah maybe. Thankfully there's been a big rise in social media influencers who do more than just post pictures of cute girls in cute outfits. They don't just try to influence what you buy but also how you think and feel about yourself. There are so many now who talk about things like MH, self care, body confidence etc. They can be really really empowering. I can only speak from my experience obviously. But there are a few accounts that genuinely saved me when I was at my lowest point in my life. Definitely following whoever's the influencer du jour can be really damaging to MH though. | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook. I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. " Ive done this is well. I only follow accounts that bring value to my life and make me smile. Its really helped my in having a better outlook on myself and my body | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook. I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. Ive done this is well. I only follow accounts that bring value to my life and make me smile. Its really helped my in having a better outlook on myself and my body " *kisses x | |||
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"I learned to love myself at an early age. The parish priest used to tell me if I didn't stop it I'd go blind. " I hope your loving yourself still on a regular basis | |||
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"I learned to love myself at an early age. The parish priest used to tell me if I didn't stop it I'd go blind. I hope your loving yourself still on a regular basis " Nobody loves me as much as I do | |||
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"I learned to love myself at an early age. The parish priest used to tell me if I didn't stop it I'd go blind. I hope your loving yourself still on a regular basis Nobody loves me as much as I do " Everyone should love you | |||
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"I learned to love myself at an early age. The parish priest used to tell me if I didn't stop it I'd go blind. I hope your loving yourself still on a regular basis Nobody loves me as much as I do Everyone should love you " I've been saying that for years | |||
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"Life and circumstances can change a person. I do know my own worth and what I am capable of. But some events have literally thrown me into doubt about you I was,But over time. I am fighting every day to remember that I have worth,and to remember that I am not responsible for How others see me or act towards me. But how I handle it. I am a Suicide Survivor .And I am grateful for been alive each day and literally live in the moment as tomorrow isn't promised. I have lost people who have literally meant that the world to me not just by death. Some of my friends would say that I am confident and chatty. It's a learning journey about oneself not everyone.not everyone is comfortable with getting to know who they are. " Very true. And don't forget you're a brave bitch for being so open and honest here. Hats off girl x | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook. I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. Ive done this is well. I only follow accounts that bring value to my life and make me smile. Its really helped my in having a better outlook on myself and my body " I think that fab is just like many other social media sites. Most people present themselves in the best possible light. Pictures are taken from the most flattering angles. Through forum posts we try to present ourselves as knowledgeable, cerebral or witty. After all....everyone is trying to market themselves as potential sexual partners (be that no strings). Why is fab any different than Facebook or Instagram ? | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook. I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. Ive done this is well. I only follow accounts that bring value to my life and make me smile. Its really helped my in having a better outlook on myself and my body I think that fab is just like many other social media sites. Most people present themselves in the best possible light. Pictures are taken from the most flattering angles. Through forum posts we try to present ourselves as knowledgeable, cerebral or witty. After all....everyone is trying to market themselves as potential sexual partners (be that no strings). Why is fab any different than Facebook or Instagram ?" The amount of genitalia on show | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook. I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. Ive done this is well. I only follow accounts that bring value to my life and make me smile. Its really helped my in having a better outlook on myself and my body I think that fab is just like many other social media sites. Most people present themselves in the best possible light. Pictures are taken from the most flattering angles. Through forum posts we try to present ourselves as knowledgeable, cerebral or witty. After all....everyone is trying to market themselves as potential sexual partners (be that no strings). Why is fab any different than Facebook or Instagram ? The amount of genitalia on show " True....note to self...need to get a couple of cock snaps on a Barbados beach. | |||
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"as above, We as a couple are convinced that avoiding all social media has a huge impact on our positive mental health. Give up yer aul' facebook. I actually disagree. I know that everyone likes to blame social media. Sure I just did it myself! But I think that by curating your social feeds v intentionally, it can have a massively positive effect on your MH. I did this a couple of years ago after a v low point MH wise. I unfollowed every single account that made me feel bad about myself and replaced them all with body positivity/self love/MH accounts. It was really transformative for me. Social media is just a tool like any other I think. It's effect on you totally depends on how you use it in my opinion. Ive done this is well. I only follow accounts that bring value to my life and make me smile. Its really helped my in having a better outlook on myself and my body I think that fab is just like many other social media sites. Most people present themselves in the best possible light. Pictures are taken from the most flattering angles. Through forum posts we try to present ourselves as knowledgeable, cerebral or witty. After all....everyone is trying to market themselves as potential sexual partners (be that no strings). Why is fab any different than Facebook or Instagram ? The amount of genitalia on show True....note to self...need to get a couple of cock snaps on a Barbados beach." I think i should help you take them #justsaying | |||
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"I'd certainly attribute a large part of my sense of self worth to my upbringing; positively I may add! I work with kids and, especially of those early primary school age, if ever I ask something like "Do we have any singers/dancers with us?" without fail they all shoot their hands up They haven't been told otherwise, rightfully so. They're brought up by their parents and teachers to know that sense of potential. However, I'm not ashamed to admit that my self-esteem can change each and every day. How I feel about myself. It's possible for a person to have a high sense of self-esteem yet not feel "worthy". Conversely, I can go about my day with low self-esteem, how I feel about myself, but it's knowing that I as a person am greater than those things. As nice as it is to feel good about ourselves, in our appearance etc, what happens if we suddenly don't? Do we suddenly become not worthy too? There's a fine line between self-worth and self-esteem but a foundation for either is needed for the other. Just my two cents " Our true value is far more then a reflection in a mirror...on bad days if we know this we'll be fine. | |||
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"Had a good upbringing and good circle of friends but feel I have always struggled with confidence due to over thinking and generally being a quiet person until I get to know someone. Try to keep active and push myself outside my comfort zone a bit each time to try and imorove. Obviously still have loads to do, but as I said before in another forum we are all the La Sagrada Familia and we are never done " We are all a work-in-progress and never know what challenges lie ahead. | |||
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"We are all a work-in-progress and never know what challenges lie ahead. " Totally true | |||
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