FabSwingers.com forum: Social behaviour

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This is a gender fluid thread.

I’ll describe a scenario. Put yourselves in either pair of shoes.

A dark and fairly isolated road. There’s nobody around, the rain is pouring down and it’s a little breezy. The road has a footpath either side.

A woman is alone walking, a man is 20 paces behind her. She is aware that a person is behind her. She might be a little nervous.

Should the man stop walking and allow the woman to put a longer distance between them?

Should the man cross to the other pavement and continue on his way?

Should the man continue to walk behind the woman closing the gap between them?

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By *hocko87Man
over a year ago

dublin

It is scary especially at nite time .

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

Cross to other pavement

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate when that happens... trying to stay focussed on not getting frightened and remembering that you would have to be very unlucky to meet the wrong man on that road. It really is a horrible feeling though. I’d appreciate the man crossing to the other side.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A and B. Stop, let her move on, cross to the other side, once she is out of view or gone way up the road you can proceed. It's basic manners.

The third option is a definite no no.

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By *vpamelaTV/TS
over a year ago

kinkville

If he is walking faster then definitely cross. Same speed, just stop, check his phone and allow some space.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This frightens the life out of me. I avoid walking alone at night as best I can. I'd like A the best but I'd be happy with B. I'd set off sprinting and screaming down the road if he did C!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Really. The man should continue walking as he has been. How does he know the women is nervous and besides if he is a normal decent person then why would he change what he is doing. Stupid question of you ask me!!!.

That's like saying when I go for a run in the winter night's and mornings and if there was a women running the same route or part of the route I was running then o should stop or cross the road. Load of balls.

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By *ammerandthongsCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

I would just turn around say hello isn't it an awful night and continue on my way

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

So far it's been up to the guy to do something. Why doesn't the woman cross the road??

If I'm walking down a road an a woman is on front of me the pace I walk I normally over take thrm and keep walking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Continue walking, close the gap and carry on, if the lady is nervous let her cross the road, if i were walking with kids, i would always walk on the outside of the kerb to protect them from oncoming traffic..but thats it, i dont usually wear my cape out anymore, so if theres a puddle or a lump of shit ladies, deal with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why should the man do anything but keep walking???

What a nonsense question!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why should the man do anything but keep walking???

What a nonsense question! "

Why is it nonsense to try and ascertain if chivilry is dead or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's dead !!! Equal rights and the activists put a end to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's dead !!! Equal rights and the activists put a end to it. "

Very true but on the seem note if one person tries to change the world back to a better time it should be aplodded

Stop and cross over

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Really. The man should continue walking as he has been. How does he know the women is nervous and besides if he is a normal decent person then why would he change what he is doing. Stupid question of you ask me!!!.

I think I depends where you are in the country or city, I've been in this situation a good few times through the years, not everyone is paronied and on several occasions ended up having a laugh and most of the time keeping them company on their journey at least as far as your going...i don't see it as a duty or that a lady walking alone is a damsel in distress, it's nice to be nice somtimes..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why should the man do anything but keep walking???

What a nonsense question!

Why is it nonsense to try and ascertain if chivilry is dead or not

Chivalry has nothing to do with the scenario you presented, the man cannot possibly know what the woman is thinking.

If the woman is frightened in any way then maybe she should pick up the pace or crossover.

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By *aid backMan
over a year ago

by a lake with my rod out

"It's dead !!! Equal rights and the activists put a end to it.

Very true but on the seem note if one person tries to change the world back to a better time it should be aplodded

Stop and cross over "

A better time like what typhoid was rampant and women had no rights at?? Yeah let's go back to a better time where men wore capes and placed them down over puddles

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By *ofistimacatedMan
over a year ago

cavan town

"Why should the man do anything but keep walking???

What a nonsense question!

Why is it nonsense to try and ascertain if chivilry is dead or not

"
the undertone of this question suggests its not about being chivalrous. Its sad that the first thing people think is that this guy is anything other than genuine. Possibly on this path for the same reason she is..... to get home.

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By *antra MassageMan
over a year ago

city

I wouldn't want to cause her any distress, so what I usually do in these situations is cross over, especially if she looks back over her shoulder to see who I am. It's simply good social skills.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its has happens me a few times in the past, i just crossed the road .

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By *ouble Trouble 1000Couple
over a year ago

ireland

I'm a nervous wreck at best of times so this would freak me out ,I'd run for my life !

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By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

Do what I do, speed up, overtake, then stop and stand with your back against the wall so that they have to pass directly infront of you.

Then stare straight out into the road and dont move.at the point they get to right infront of you move your head to follow their path, then start to walk behind them again.

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By *eanbelfastMan
over a year ago

Belfast

It’s an easy one. Cross the road and I walk fast enough to get ahead and give the lady a bit of reassurance.

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By *eankaren88Couple
over a year ago

By the sea

Change scenario...

A man is alone walking, and another person is 20 paces behind him.

If I was the man walking ahead. I'd be more comfortable if he or she crossed the road and overtook me

Even in daylight don't think the feeling changes if no one else is around.

You never know what crazies are around.

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By *lan5200Man
over a year ago

cavan

"This is a gender fluid thread.

I’ll describe a scenario. Put yourselves in either pair of shoes.

A dark and fairly isolated road. There’s nobody around, the rain is pouring down and it’s a little breezy. The road has a footpath either side.

A woman is alone walking, a man is 20 paces behind her. She is aware that a person is behind her. She might be a little nervous.

Should the man stop walking and allow the woman to put a longer distance between them?

Should the man cross to the other pavement and continue on his way?

Should the man continue to walk behind the woman closing the gap between them?

I’ve never heard an Irish person call a foothpath a pavement, we’re losing the run of ourselves again #notions . Next y’all will be calling them sidewalks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is a gender fluid thread.

I’ll describe a scenario. Put yourselves in either pair of shoes.

A dark and fairly isolated road. There’s nobody around, the rain is pouring down and it’s a little breezy. The road has a footpath either side.

A woman is alone walking, a man is 20 paces behind her. She is aware that a person is behind her. She might be a little nervous.

Should the man stop walking and allow the woman to put a longer distance between them?

Should the man cross to the other pavement and continue on his way?

Should the man continue to walk behind the woman closing the gap between them?

I’ve never heard an Irish person call a foothpath a pavement, we’re losing the run of ourselves again #notions . Next y’all will be calling them sidewalks"

They were called the ditch in my day

In relation to the scenario it wouldnt even enter my head that O would be intimidating the person male or female in front so I'd have kept walking..... might think twice about crossing next time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yall need to wise the fuck up and just go about your business!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What ever happened to just waking down the street and minding your own business??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having grown up in Belfast in the 70s and 80s, I have experienced this in the context of the troubles. Walking home in the dark at night, if a car slowed down beside me or someone was walking behind me, it always made me feel very uneasy. It fact, it really frightened me. I always thought that my time was up!

That’s why I now always cross to the other side of the road at night if I’m walking behind someone, just to try and make them feel a little less frightened and uneasy.

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By *orinaTSTV/TS
over a year ago

Dublin

That happened with me tonight walking to my apartment. Two guys in hoodies... I stopped myself breaking into a run just.. by my mind was racing. Thankfully they turned left into a side entry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So far it's been up to the guy to do something. Why doesn't the woman cross the road??

If I'm walking down a road an a woman is on front of me the pace I walk I normally over take thrm and keep walking. "
I was thinking the same thing. It's not my fault that she is going my way. And as I was walking faster in the 1st place.Am always going to catch up and past someone on the road.if I stop how long do I do it because I would end up stopping again.

If I cross the road and there's nothing on the other side. I could still overtake.And be just as much of a danger as it only takes secs to cross again. We all can overthink this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I'm uncomfortable, then it's up to me to take myself out of the situation.

I have walked behind someone on my way to work & we just happened to be going the same way. I cross over, but that's more because I'm antisocial & I don't want anyone talking to me until I'm paid to talk

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