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CANCER

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By * am in Your Dreams OP   Man
over a year ago

South

Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone.

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By *orguyMan
over a year ago

Tuam

I've been in that position too 17 year's ago with my Dad too. Tough going but keep the head up.

Keep the faith and God Bless.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi OP. As you say many have but it's a very lonely place to be in and sometimes one has no where to turn. I've been there with my mum twice and then myself 5 yrs back. Not a place I want to return to but Ive no doubt I will again as it's becoming one of the more common illnesses of western society in particular.

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By *iver80Man
over a year ago

south side ,

Im sorry for your dad but mate thats a very personal thing you shouldnt be posting that here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone."

It's an amazing thing you're doing, looking after your dad. I've been where you are, but had lots of help from siblings. Scream away, you are most definitely not alone x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Im sorry for your dad but mate thats a very personal thing you shouldnt be posting that here "

Why not? It's a forum for discussion of whatever people want to discuss. Why shouldn't he seek support from an online community? If you don't like the thread, move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have my sympathy OP, not cancer but I have cared for both my parents with dementia and my father's depression and alcoholism. Without any help from my only sibling. It's tough going and you deserve support from anywhere you can find it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Im sorry for your dad but mate thats a very personal thing you shouldnt be posting that here

Why not? It's a forum for discussion of whatever people want to discuss. Why shouldn't he seek support from an online community? If you don't like the thread, move on."

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast


"You have my sympathy OP, not cancer but I have cared for both my parents with dementia and my father's depression and alcoholism. Without any help from my only sibling. It's tough going and you deserve support from anywhere you can find it."

Having no help from a sibling is the worst feeling....at least you know that you did all you could for your parents xx

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By *unnitoesWoman
over a year ago

Belfast


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone."

I can relate to this situation, so sorry that this is happening to you and your family, you will get through it xx

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By *iver80Man
over a year ago

south side ,

Mate ive lost my younger brother and two of my best mates four aunties 6 uncles ...trust me talking about it makes it just that little bit easier ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone."

First of all OP well done for looking after your Dad. You're not looking for sympathy but I empathise with you so so much having been through a similar situation very recently. The word is filled with horror, dread, fear, sadness and so many other emotions.

I've no idea where your Dad has it or what his projected future is. I hope for him he is getting treated by the best doctors there are and I wish him all the best in his treatment.

Don't judge yourself for finding this hard. It's devestating. You are entitled to feel sad. You are entitled to cry your eyes out if need be. It's healthy to detoxify negative emotions by engaging with them and leaving them pass.

You cannot choose what happens to you in life OP but you can choose how to engage with it. Try speak with a counsellor to get some advice.

Be kind to yourself. You and your Dad deserve kindness and understanding at this time x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You have my sympathy OP, not cancer but I have cared for both my parents with dementia and my father's depression and alcoholism. Without any help from my only sibling. It's tough going and you deserve support from anywhere you can find it.

Having no help from a sibling is the worst feeling....at least you know that you did all you could for your parents xx"

Thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone.

First of all OP well done for looking after your Dad. You're not looking for sympathy but I empathise with you so so much having been through a similar situation very recently. The word is filled with horror, dread, fear, sadness and so many other emotions.

I've no idea where your Dad has it or what his projected future is. I hope for him he is getting treated by the best doctors there are and I wish him all the best in his treatment.

Don't judge yourself for finding this hard. It's devestating. You are entitled to feel sad. You are entitled to cry your eyes out if need be. It's healthy to detoxify negative emotions by engaging with them and leaving them pass.

You cannot choose what happens to you in life OP but you can choose how to engage with it. Try speak with a counsellor to get some advice.

Be kind to yourself. You and your Dad deserve kindness and understanding at this time x"

Very well put. We put pressure on ourselves to be perfect, it's normal to have a whole range of emotions when dealing with a situation which is so challenging on both practical and emotional levels, finding someone who can listen to you is hugely helpful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone.

First of all OP well done for looking after your Dad. You're not looking for sympathy but I empathise with you so so much having been through a similar situation very recently. The word is filled with horror, dread, fear, sadness and so many other emotions.

I've no idea where your Dad has it or what his projected future is. I hope for him he is getting treated by the best doctors there are and I wish him all the best in his treatment.

Don't judge yourself for finding this hard. It's devestating. You are entitled to feel sad. You are entitled to cry your eyes out if need be. It's healthy to detoxify negative emotions by engaging with them and leaving them pass.

You cannot choose what happens to you in life OP but you can choose how to engage with it. Try speak with a counsellor to get some advice.

Be kind to yourself. You and your Dad deserve kindness and understanding at this time x"

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By *etmebeurfantasyWoman
over a year ago

My town

I feel your pain op I cared for mother when she was ill, had her stay with me most of the time. I have no siblings so it was myself but wouldn't have it any other way. Sadly I lost my mother in 2012.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My sympathies OP.

I was in the exact same situation in September last year. It was singularly the worst time of my life so I can imagine what you are going through.

You'll stay strong though because you have to.

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By *r_mrs_studmuffinCouple
over a year ago

narnia


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone."
sorry to hear this op its a very trying time for everyone involved do your best is all you can do scream cry if you have too wish you well opxxx

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By *r_mrs_studmuffinCouple
over a year ago

narnia


"I've been in that position too 17 year's ago with my Dad too. Tough going but keep the head up.

Keep the faith and God Bless."

hugs xx

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By *r_mrs_studmuffinCouple
over a year ago

narnia


"You have my sympathy OP, not cancer but I have cared for both my parents with dementia and my father's depression and alcoholism. Without any help from my only sibling. It's tough going and you deserve support from anywhere you can find it."
hugs xxx

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By *K430Man
over a year ago

Tipperary


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone."

Fair play to you for stepping up ,from experience it's hard to watch someone you love go through it , all you can do is make a horrendous situation as bearable as possible for both of ye

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Took time out to nurse my dad for the last 6 months of his life really got to know the person as when growing up he was always out working hard providing for family the time i spent with him i will treasure for the rest of my life you will have good and bad days op best of luck

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By *igBlondeDommeWoman
over a year ago

middle of nowhere


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone."

))hugs((. The fact that you are caring for your Dad will be a great comfort to you. I'm sure the good forumites of fab will be here for you when you need them. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the support for the OP is amazing & shows that Fabbers have more on their mind than sex. From the replies it is obvious many have been down this road & are only toi happy to support & empathize. During such stressful times it is good to talk & never be afraid to ask for help or admit to being overwhelmed, the people you least expect to help are often the veryones that have your back.

fair play to the OP for sharing & to all that have replied for caring.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Posting this thread at this hour because it's another night that I am awake caring for my dad. Not looking for sympathy because there is no one in this country that hasn't been touched by this bastard. I hate the word. Sorry for this thread but sometimes you want to hear your screams or listen to someone else's to know you not alone."

So very sorry to hear this OP, I cannot begin to imagine how difficult this must be for you, from the support here on the thread know that you are not alone and I hope that helps bring some comfort at this horrendous time, sending you positive thoughts and energy there, mind yourself there too, it's a very stressful time for you I'm sure.

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

Utmost respect op for what you are doing and hoping you find beautiful moments amid the hardships of caring for your father through his illness. Make time for yourself in all of this as it's as important as caring for your dad. Virtual hugs to you X

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