FabSwingers.com forum: Best insults...

By *verage Joe Black OP Man
over a year ago

Border Area

What’s the best, most bizarre, funniest or most cutting insult you’ve ever been subjected to..?

After refusing a guy who was half cut entry to a bar one night a long time ago in Belfast, the volley aimed at me was: “Yer ma’s a snowblower!”

To this day I have no idea what that means..!

Other classics people have been subjected to/heard..??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The only way you were concieved was yer da came into the sock yer ma washed her fanny with

was prob best ive been told

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best part of you ran down your auld fella's leg. Heard that one a long time ago, still think it's funny

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

A friend of mine always scathingly replies to someone who tries to answer a question he asked somebody else "I was talking to the doctor not the disease"

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By *verage Joe Black OP Man
over a year ago

Border Area

"A friend of mine always scathingly replies to someone who tries to answer a question he asked somebody else "I was talking to the doctor not the disease" "

Ouch..!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They're around her like flies to shite ..... a favourite amongst myself and my friends during the 90s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She said I had to much beard.. I said she had to much face.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A mate of mine years ago was at a disco, (hes a farmer) after getting the knock back ,or possibly insulted by her I dont know I was'nt There ,I cant defend either of them ,said to her,

"do you know what you remind me of ?"

she replied "what?"

" A round bale " he replied

She replied "are you calling me fat?"

" No No no not at all ,its not the shape or the size of you, eerrh its the smell of ya "

I presume He got a warm lug .

Sounds way more funny in the deep drole, thick tongued mumble of the south Monaghan accent .

Harry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Even the tide would not take her out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you in mourning for a dead cock?

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By *ove2lick76Man
over a year ago

Ardee

Female friend of mine to a d*unken fella one night.....if I'd a field of fannies I'd still not let ya look across the ditch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yev got a face like a bulldog chewin a wasp..

Yev got a face like a cow lickin piss off a nettle..

Kiss ye under the mistletoe?? I wouldnt kiss ya under an anastethic..

I could go on all night. I will never forget when my mom said all these to me.. i was only 34 at the time.

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By *oserMan
over a year ago

where the wild roses grow

Often heard a pal of mine ask his missus when he was chasing the ride..

"are ya in the jammies or the Pjammies tonight?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You may have a body for baywatch but by god that face is more crimewatch ... heard that 1 last week again lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He would be harmless only for whats hanging out of him!!

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By *azkinsWoman
over a year ago

leeds

You're only here because your mother slept in someone else's wet patch.

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By *K430Man
over a year ago

Tipperary

You'll never be half the man your mother was

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 18/01/18 22:22:42]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My favourite one is when someone says

He's as mad as a box of frogs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

See you you wouldn't get a ride in a Rodeo

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By *K430Man
over a year ago

Tipperary

The tide wouldn't take you out

If you had two brains you'd be twice as thick

The list is endless

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here he is,,,,,, the fresh prince of bell end

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hubby got through out of nightclub roughly for falling asleep.

I said is your dick so small you have to bully other boys.

He didn't look best pleased and band me for life. Lol.

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway

"What’s the best, most bizarre, funniest or most cutting insult you’ve ever been subjected to..?

After refusing a guy who was half cut entry to a bar one night a long time ago in Belfast, the volley aimed at me was: “Yer ma’s a snowblower!”

To this day I have no idea what that means..!

Other classics people have been subjected to/heard..??"

It's from short circuit. Johnny 5

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By *aa MidletonMan
over a year ago

east cork

Heard this years ago, never have had any opportunity to use it, but thought it was pretty humorous, 'you look like a constipated poodle getting electrocuted'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You may have a body for baywatch but by god that face is more crimewatch ... heard that 1 last week again lol "

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By *eltic CplCouple
over a year ago

Kildare

if she had peddles i wouldn't ride her lol

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By *r MacmullyMan
over a year ago

Tarbert

I wanted a man not an gorilla (said to cause of my body hair)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn't ride you into battle!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cross your legs you're drawing all the flies....said quietly when you want someone to shut their beak.

Very old but still makes me chuckle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're the cum your ma should have swallowed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're the cum your ma should have swallowed."

Lol lol lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If brains were birdshit you would have a clean cage...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're the cum your ma should have swallowed."

Boooooooom!!!!

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By *mandajane01TV/TS
over a year ago

Ballymena

The midwife must have thrown away the baby and kept the afterbirth

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By *ocial SwingerMan
over a year ago

Rosses

She has teeth on her that could bite an apple through a tenis racket

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By *ammerandthongsCouple
over a year ago

Limerick

Your birth cert is an apology from the condom company

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd call you a cunt except you lack the warmth and depth.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have a face like someone’s just shit in your handbag.

But “who is this clown” is a good one too. It says that you’re a clown, but that you’re not even one of the well known clowns

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By *asualguyMan
over a year ago

I'd rather get up on a Monday than get up on her

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So thick he would get lost in half a thought.

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