FabSwingers.com forum: George Hook

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It appears George hook has come face to face with the twitterati thought police.

But are his comments really "enabling r*pe" and "extremely damaging"

Are newstalk (a radio station) now "violators of human rights"?

I'll leave my own views that world has gone mad aside and let others debate it.

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By *ichael McCarthyMan
over a year ago

Lucan

What needs to be accepted by George and some others is that r@pe is perpetrated by one person, usually a man, on another person, usually a woman. Nothing that woman does invites that r@pe. If that woman does not consent to the sexual act, even if she's jumping up and down naked on a bed, then it is a crime. It's a simple concept and if anyone thinks that that is "pc gone mad" then they may need to rethink their attitude.

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By *ohnandGemCouple
over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

Couldn't have happened to a nicer bloke.

He's a letch and a creep.

Lots of idiots in comment sections harping on about it being "a bad day for free speech"

Once again, freedom of speech is not freedom from concequences.

Is the whole thing an overreaction? Maybe. But this is the straw that broke the camels back. Him and his ilk have no place on the airways. Their job is to provoke reaction, well guess what he did and it's fucked him up. Karma's a bitch.

The likes of him, and those other goons in the US like hannity and O'Reilly are a dying breed and they feed on the gullible and ignorant and I won't miss them when they're gone.

If someone is r***d it is NEVER their fault.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think the cause of freedom of speech has been helped by george hooks approach to the subject matter, nor for that matter newstalks culture of male dominance which is effectively endorsed by the exclusion of women presenters on its programmes, there are far too many dinosaurs that take up pivotal roles in various organisations across our society.. On the subject matter at hand, there cannot be any ambiguity, so I feel its fitting that he should fall on his sword.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He always was a prick. Delighted!

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

What happened?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

...ah your awake.....nothing back to sleep now...

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By *ohnandGemCouple
over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

"What happened?"

To quote Waterford whispers news:

"Ignorant prick says something ignorant"

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By *exmark12Man
over a year ago

Rathcoole/Roscommon/Mayo

Super Mouth opened it too wide and bit off more than he could chew.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He's on a radio station and is paid to give his opinion on his opinion show and open debate and receive opinions from other people. He gives his opinion and gets taken off air. Him being off air is not going to stop people from thinking that women ask to be sexually assaulted. That mindset will never be gone. Aside from what he said, every friggen day someone is offended by something that is said or is done and we pander to their bullshit in case they are offended.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here here...what he said

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

"...ah your awake.....nothing back to sleep now...

Thanks. I hate being woken for nowt

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By *ichael McCarthyMan
over a year ago

Lucan

"He's on a radio station and is paid to give his opinion on his opinion show and open debate and receive opinions from other people. He gives his opinion and gets taken off air. Him being off air is not going to stop people from thinking that women ask to be sexually assaulted. That mindset will never be gone. Aside from what he said, every friggen day someone is offended by something that is said or is done and we pander to their bullshit in case they are offended. "

There's a world of a difference between people being offended and making excuses for a r@pist on the basis that the woman shouldn't have been there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There's a world of a difference between people being offended and making excuses for a r@pist on the basis that the woman shouldn't have been there.

Fuck me. If I said it was daytime, you'd come back and say no it's not, it's nighttime.

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By *ichael McCarthyMan
over a year ago

Lucan

There's a world of a difference between people being offended and making excuses for a r@pist on the basis that the woman shouldn't have been there.

Fuck me. If I said it was daytime, you'd come back and say no it's not, it's nighttime. "

If it was nighttime then yes, I would.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I don't see how the timeless wisdom of not putting yourself on a potentially dodgy situation (appropriate precaution) is so bad. It doesn't remove the fault of the perpetrator in anyway it simply reduces the probability of getting into trouble.

If can apply to anything from not getting your head kicked in or wallet taken down a dark dodgy lane in a bad part of town to wearing bright clothes when walking/running/cycling at night.

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By *easingTimMan
over a year ago

Loughlinstown

Hook, like Katie Hopkins is little more than a mouth who has gotten away for years with saying provocative things that are childish and offensive ...

Until now...

So guess what? Time to have the courage of your convictions or face the music Hooky Boy...

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By *atthewsundriMan
over a year ago

dundrum

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't see how the timeless wisdom of not putting yourself on a potentially dodgy situation (appropriate precaution) is so bad. It doesn't remove the fault of the perpetrator in anyway it simply reduces the probability of getting into trouble.

If can apply to anything from not getting your head kicked in or wallet taken down a dark dodgy lane in a bad part of town to wearing bright clothes when walking/running/cycling at night. "

I think people have different expectations, standards etc of our national broadcasters, if the chris barrys of the airwaves made similiar remarks, would we be having this discussion probably not, will some of what hook said be lost, hopefully not all, discussion and debate is necessary.

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By *atthewsundriMan
over a year ago

dundrum

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help. "
well what mindset Ru on about then??

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By *longshottMan
over a year ago

Limerick

Remember when the lunatics take over the asylum straight jackets are handed out without distinction.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help. well what mindset Ru on about then??"

I said, taking him off air, is not going to stop some people thinking that women ask to be sexually assaulted. I really have to explain that to you? Sweet lamb of God. There are people in this world that think women ask to be assaulted either by what they do or wear. Nothing can be done about people like that unless you take them outside and shoot them. Taking him off air, won't stop some people from thinking like that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

If can apply to anything from not getting your head kicked in or wallet taken down a dark dodgy lane in a bad part of town to wearing bright clothes when walking/running/cycling at night.

You see there is no debate... It's censorship plain and simple.

From the quotes I've read it's not like he was condoning it.... I haven't heard it though so maybe there was something in his tone or delivery.

I think less of him now (not that I had a great opinion of him before) for backtracking on an what to me is an innocent enough observation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must be dumb cos I've never heard of him

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By *easingTimMan
over a year ago

Loughlinstown

"I must be dumb cos I've never heard of him

----------

No, you have a life... Big difference

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By *atthewsundriMan
over a year ago

dundrum

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help. well what mindset Ru on about then??

Now is that slightly clearer to you or do I have to go and ask a three year old to explain it to you? Perhaps if you gave up text speak and spent a bit of time reading and less time on Fab, you wouldn't make a tit of yourself. And no need to apologise or correct your non factual reply."
well done let's leave him on air on a public radio station so everyone can listen to this bull shit and sweep everything under the carpet as if nothing was said and carry on as normal. Instead maybe taking the dinosaur off air and trying to do something about it. Now for me that sounds like more sense!! Btw my 3 year old is after telling me that you dinosaur

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help. well what mindset Ru on about then??

Now is that slightly clearer to you or do I have to go and ask a three year old to explain it to you? Perhaps if you gave up text speak and spent a bit of time reading and less time on Fab, you wouldn't make a tit of yourself. And no need to apologise or correct your non factual reply. well done let's leave him on air on a public radio station so everyone can listen to this bull shit and sweep everything under the carpet as if nothing was said and carry on as normal. Instead maybe taking the dinosaur off air and trying to do something about it. Now for me that sounds like more sense!! Btw my 3 year old is after telling me that you dinosaur "

I give up. Nobody said sweep it under the carpet or is that another made up story of yours? And I'm glad I'm a dinosaur, an informed dinosaur anyway.

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By *atthewsundriMan
over a year ago

dundrum

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help. well what mindset Ru on about then??

Now is that slightly clearer to you or do I have to go and ask a three year old to explain it to you? Perhaps if you gave up text speak and spent a bit of time reading and less time on Fab, you wouldn't make a tit of yourself. And no need to apologise or correct your non factual reply. well done let's leave him on air on a public radio station so everyone can listen to this bull shit and sweep everything under the carpet as if nothing was said and carry on as normal. Instead maybe taking the dinosaur off air and trying to do something about it. Now for me that sounds like more sense!! Btw my 3 year old is after telling me that you dinosaur

I give up. Nobody said sweep it under the carpet or is that another made up story of yours? And I'm glad I'm a dinosaur, an informed dinosaur anyway."
you give up I give up jesus !! I'm think I'm going to have an informed discussion with my 3 year old, at least it will be a proper one. He doesn't know how to back track Goodluck dinosaur maybe they should put you on the radio instead

another muppet ireland is full of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help. well what mindset Ru on about then??

Now is that slightly clearer to you or do I have to go and ask a three year old to explain it to you? Perhaps if you gave up text speak and spent a bit of time reading and less time on Fab, you wouldn't make a tit of yourself. And no need to apologise or correct your non factual reply. well done let's leave him on air on a public radio station so everyone can listen to this bull shit and sweep everything under the carpet as if nothing was said and carry on as normal. Instead maybe taking the dinosaur off air and trying to do something about it. Now for me that sounds like more sense!! Btw my 3 year old is after telling me that you dinosaur

I give up. Nobody said sweep it under the carpet or is that another made up story of yours? And I'm glad I'm a dinosaur, an informed dinosaur anyway. you give up I give up jesus !! I'm think I'm going to have an informed discussion with my 3 year old, at least it will be a proper one. He doesn't know how to back track Goodluck dinosaur maybe they should put you on the radio instead

another muppet ireland is full of them

There we go again with you telling lies.

Where did I backtrack?

And call me a muppet all you like.

" another muppet ireland is full of them".

From that statement, you are no different than George Hook. The two of you have much in common. Good luck on Fab and in life with your blinkers and wild speculation and accusations.

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By *oserMan
over a year ago

where the wild roses grow

"What needs to be accepted by George and some others is that r@pe is perpetrated by one person, usually a man, on another person, usually a woman. Nothing that woman does invites that r@pe. If that woman does not consent to the sexual act, even if she's jumping up and down naked on a bed, then it is a crime. It's a simple concept and if anyone thinks that that is "pc gone mad" then they may need to rethink their attitude. "

Ah mick

Surely she was asking for it after all she was drinking and wearing clothing that showed skin and then she went back to someones house. Like whats the poor fella to do?

Fook me anyone that condons Hooks comments is a fooking moron.

Nay not a moron, a cunt

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By *atthewsundriMan
over a year ago

dundrum

Where did I say that women ask to be sexually assaulted?

or are you the type of person who fails to read things are then likes to spout off untruths?

Perhaps you should try and read what I wrote again and maybe ask someone else to read it to you if you need help. well what mindset Ru on about then??

Now is that slightly clearer to you or do I have to go and ask a three year old to explain it to you? Perhaps if you gave up text speak and spent a bit of time reading and less time on Fab, you wouldn't make a tit of yourself. And no need to apologise or correct your non factual reply. well done let's leave him on air on a public radio station so everyone can listen to this bull shit and sweep everything under the carpet as if nothing was said and carry on as normal. Instead maybe taking the dinosaur off air and trying to do something about it. Now for me that sounds like more sense!! Btw my 3 year old is after telling me that you dinosaur

another muppet ireland is full of them

There we go again with you telling lies.

Where did I backtrack?

And call me a muppet all you like.

" another muppet ireland is full of them".

From that statement, you are no different than George Hook. The two of you have much in common. Good luck on Fab and in life with your blinkers and wild speculation and accusations."
snore snore snore as I said my 3 year old is more interesting!!

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By *atthewsundriMan
over a year ago

dundrum

Ah mick

Surely she was asking for it after all she was drinking and wearing clothing that showed skin and then she went back to someones house. Like whats the poor fella to do?

Fook me anyone that condons Hooks comments is a fooking moron.

Nay not a moron, a cunt

"
well said some people on here thinks it's ok for public figures to preech what they like and get away with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This whole debate reminds me of the old road safety ad where the paramedic says "it was the guy without the seat belt did the damage "...no one mentioned the driver of the other car at the wrong side of the road

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This whole debate reminds me of the old road safety ad where the paramedic says "it was the guy without the seat belt did the damage "...no one mentioned the driver of the other car at the wrong side of the road "

And yet we continue to advocate for seat belts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just think we need to remember than not everyone attaches by morals and principles what is right or wrong and sadly there will be people that will see women dress provocative as an invitation! So while they are a minority, they are also everywhere so why would we insist instigating !

And yes is mainly men probably something to do with the way we are deeply programme something primitive not acceptable in this modern society,

Like everything the prevention is always better than the cure

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And what do we advocate on fab as the do's and don't of organising a meet to up the chances of a safe enjoyable encounter?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And yet we continue to advocate for seat belts

And more importantly why...

Simple because while there always things beyond our control (bad drivers, the nefarious actions of scumbags) there are factors which we can control to reduce the chances of harm.

The over offended have allowed common sense to become a proxy for woman hating, r*pe apology and all sorts of lunacy.

Either take the words as they are intended or twist them to fit an agenda. You can decide to be moderate and sensible or you can decide to believe the hype and be outraged.

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By *oserMan
over a year ago

where the wild roses grow

And yet we continue to advocate for seat belts

Surely you agree with seat belts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And yet we continue to advocate for seat belts

Surely you agree with seat belts

"
the point is exactly this!!! it's not the seat belt , wearing it is nearly common sense can save your life no argument about it ! But looking at the whole picture is the important part because of one argument we hide the whole picture

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By *oserMan
over a year ago

where the wild roses grow

And yet we continue to advocate for seat belts

Surely you agree with seat belts

the point is exactly this!!! it's not the seat belt , wearing it is nearly common sense can save your life no argument about it ! But looking at the whole picture is the important part because of one argument we hide the whole picture "

Actually the old add implied that the guy without the seat belt did the damage because he was not "secured" into position thus became a weapon by hitting every other occupant.

The add was to reduce fatalities.

But yes the driver was also to blame and because of that there were adds to say drive slower and drive without drink etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This issue needs to be put in context, the way hook dealt with it is wrong in my opinion, sex education in this country is irrelevant with today's generation, in as much as it was in ours, only in the very recent past has their been a focus on education for people who dont understand what the word no means, ffs this is the base were starting from with some people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

News talk employ him to make them money through sponsorship. He's failing miserable at doing that now. He had to go really.

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By *oserMan
over a year ago

where the wild roses grow

And yet we continue to advocate for seat belts

Surely you agree with seat belts

Forget my previous post its irrelevant.

The fact is that the whole picture should still not result in r@pe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I must be dumb cos I've never heard of him

You don't like rugby, that's why

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I must be dumb cos I've never heard of him

You don't like rugby, that's why

Ah right.id know him if football player then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I must be dumb cos I've never heard of him

You don't like rugby, that's why

Ah right.id know him if football player then

You'd have his details off by heart, I have no doubt!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sill stuff from him he should know better

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

Education around the word no and consent was badly needed in an overly offended, politically correct, media based society. R*** ( Ironically I am not allowed to type the word) should be openly discussed but a lot shy away from it, why I wonder...fear of saying something that isn't politically correct, afraid they won't say the right thing, maybe it's a let's just stick with the nice topics or that it is shameful and can only be discussed in hushed tones or not at all!

Not all progressions of society are for the good. Some older view points are still valid, some are not but society disagrees on a lot of these.

Shock factor presenters generate listeners which in turn generates money. Some antic's will be patted on the back despite a clear disregard for respect... Jeremy Clarkson punches his boss.

George Hook's comments are atrocious and he is an idiot but the one good thing that can come of this is the nation is discussing a topic that people normally shy away from.

The definition of consent is being discussed, The definition of lack of control is being discussed and how a mindset viewed as "harmless" can blur the lines and potentially lead to a lot worse. Mindsets are handed out and handed down in a lot of situations.

I do not condone what Hook has said but think it's not a bad thing when a harmful mindset gets high lighted like this.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think the more harmful mindset is that teaching people that no matter what happens it's not your "fault".

That just leads to recklessness.

The perpetrator is ALWAYS the guilty party and at "fault" but in any case solid advice to stay out of danger is still solid advice.

I'll bring this back to standard swinger advice of meeting in public first, verifying they are who they say they are, telling a friend where you are going etc.

Are we all prehoc victim blaming? Is a road safety campaign victim blaming? Or hurtful to all people killed or injured on the roads in the past? ...

No, it's just COMMON SENSE

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I expect all the die hards to boycot fab for this victim blaming mindset set out in the safety section

*****

Don't forget that the only person responsible for your safety is you, so don't put yourself in a situation where a stranger can let you down. These are some tips to help:

* Don't give strangers your home phone number, your usual mobile number or your address or let them know where you work. Buy a spare PAYG SIM for your mobile and use it for initial contacts.

* Don't rely on strangers for transport, so don't agree to go somewhere in a car with someone you don't know.

* Don't turn up to strange addresses without having met the people you're expecting, first, beforehand.

* Always meet first somewhere safe and public (a cafe) first.

* Always tell someone you trust who you're going to meet, and where.

* Don't arrange meets without having spoken to the people you're expecting to meet first on phone OR on seen on cam.

* Don't invite strangers into your home.

* Don't put yourself in a situation where if someone doesn't turn up, you'll be upset. So don't travel 100s of miles and book into a hotel in the expectation of meeting someone unless you've met them beforehand

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I expect all the die hards to boycot fab for this victim blaming mindset set out in the safety section

*****

Don't forget that the only person responsible for your safety is you, so don't put yourself in a situation where a stranger can let you down. These are some tips to help:

* Don't give strangers your home phone number, your usual mobile number or your address or let them know where you work. Buy a spare PAYG SIM for your mobile and use it for initial contacts.

* Don't rely on strangers for transport, so don't agree to go somewhere in a car with someone you don't know.

* Don't turn up to strange addresses without having met the people you're expecting, first, beforehand.

* Always meet first somewhere safe and public (a cafe) first.

* Always tell someone you trust who you're going to meet, and where.

* Don't arrange meets without having spoken to the people you're expecting to meet first on phone OR on seen on cam.

* Don't invite strangers into your home.

Well you've just thrown a big spanner into the no show threads on fab, a staple diet of half the content here, there's a lot of my amusement gone out the window.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm so bored of being responsible for other people, why does this have to fall on my shoulders?

A few nights ago I was walking home and I took a short cut through an unlit alleyway where a man stopped me to tell me not to take this short cut as a woman was r@ped here not long ago.

I asked him, instead of reminding me not to get r@ped, could he instead just remind every man he meets in the alleyway not to r@pe anyone. He got mightly pissed off with me.

I've grown up being taught how not to be r@ped. What not to wear, how not to drink, how to hold my keys between my fingers in preparation for attack, the buddy system, checking in, etc etc etc. Perhaps if we all applied this over education to reminding people not to r@pe, we'd be in a better place? Why do I have to be responsible for r@pists? Can you imagine if I went around telling you and all your mates to remember not to r@pe anyone tonight?

This shit is exhausting.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/09/17 22:16:42]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The worst thing is that you are actually serious Julia. You've drank all the koolaid.

Who in their right minds thinks that telling people not to r*pe is effective in stopping r*pes!

It's like reminding people not to murder (every religion, set of laws, teachings and moral code).

It is done by people who k or that it is so wrong (and that's what makes it right for them... Because they are twisted fucks and in a very small minority of humans).

Do you also lament all those "victim blaming" road safety ads?

I honestly think the whole world has lost its shit when I read such nonsense.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm so bored of being responsible for other people, why does this have to fall on my shoulders?

A few nights ago I was walking home and I took a short cut through an unlit alleyway where a man stopped me to tell me not to take this short cut as a woman was r@ped here not long ago.

I asked him, instead of reminding me not to get r@ped, could he instead just remind every man he meets in the alleyway not to r@pe anyone. He got mightly pissed off with me.

This shit is exhausting.

Ffs. A man warns you about the fact someone was rxxxed in the dark area you were walking and you say that to him. Sweet Jesus he was only warning you. Forewarned is forearmed. I'm not surprised he was pissed off.

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By *longshottMan
over a year ago

Limerick

"I'm so bored of being responsible for other people, why does this have to fall on my shoulders?

A few nights ago I was walking home and I took a short cut through an unlit alleyway where a man stopped me to tell me not to take this short cut as a woman was r@ped here not long ago.

I asked him, instead of reminding me not to get r@ped, could he instead just remind every man he meets in the alleyway not to r@pe anyone. He got mightly pissed off with me.

This shit is exhausting.

Yep. Reminds me of the Life of Brian.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Let me just get this straight:

Assuming some men might r@pe insults all men. However, if women DON'T assume they might be r@ped, they are to blame.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wtf

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By *xplicitMan
over a year ago

donegal

"Let me just get this straight:

Assuming some men might r@pe insults all men. However, if women DON'T assume they might be r@ped, they are to blame.

Dont think thats what the lads mean..its more being ungrateful to someone who may have used the wrong language but was clearly well intended...its not insulting..its just strange behaviour...

I tend to agree that hook is pretty much an attention craving arsehole mind you...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read it again until you understand it. Why do I have to be responsible for r@pists? Instead of telling me not to get r@ped, educate men on how not to r@pe.

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By *longshottMan
over a year ago

Limerick

You have the right to run through a field of thistles but I would say don't do it with your todger hanging out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Assume this that and the other. A man warned you about a danger. Simple. If a woman warned me that the lane i was walking down was prone to men on there own getting the shit kicked out of them or what not I'd be very thankful and not spout shit.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Let me just get this straight:

Assuming some men might r@pe insults all men. However, if women DON'T assume they might be r@ped, they are to blame.

Assuming some men are rapists is factual correct and wise.

Spreading shite like 1 in 4 and mandatory consent classes is where we should be insulted.

I'm just amused, bewildered and distraught for the fabric of society when this retardism prevails.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Read it again until you understand it. Why do I have to be responsible for r@pists? Instead of telling me not to get r@ped, educate men on how not to r@pe. "

We got you the first time, but all we agree it's stupid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I didn't 'spout shit'.

What I'm saying is- if you want to inform me on how not to get r@ped, I'd much prefer if you informed potential r@pists not to do any r@ping tonight.

It'll take a while to sink in and I appreciate that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You have lost the plot Julia

How do you identify the potential rapists and how effective do you think your message will be?

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By *xplicitMan
over a year ago

donegal

Totally understand he made presumptions etc..but he was still trying to be nice and help you...even if you were carrying an ak47...he was still only trying to help...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Totally understand he made presumptions etc..but he was still trying to be nice and help you...even if you were carrying an ak47...he was still only trying to help..."

I was nice to him, my tone of voice didn't change, I didn't speak in an angry manner, I kept walking as I spoke because for all I know, he was the r@pist.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't 'spout shit'.

What I'm saying is- if you want to inform me on how not to get r@ped, I'd much prefer if you informed potential r@pists not to do any r@ping tonight.

It'll take a while to sink in and I appreciate that. "

I think youve hit on the key point in this whole discussion, it started off with blame and ends with blame, and whats been highlighted here is the toxicity of blame, again directed at the female, quite ironic really.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I didn't 'spout shit'.

What I'm saying is- if you want to inform me on how not to get r@ped, I'd much prefer if you informed potential r@pists not to do any r@ping tonight.

It'll take a while to sink in and I appreciate that.

That is stretching what the word blame actually means!

You can't r*pe yourself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You have lost the plot Julia

How do you identify the potential rapists and how effective do you think your message will be?

Well, I'll put that question back to you- how do you identify potential r@pe victims? Are they the ones in short skirts drinking too much?

My only message is that we all talk about this some more and actually evaluate what it is we are saying and the perceptions formed from what we say. It may seem ludicrous to you the fact I told a man to remind other men not to r@pe, but in fairness, it's ludicrous to me that I get reminded all the time on how not to get r@ped.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't 'spout shit'.

What I'm saying is- if you want to inform me on how not to get r@ped, I'd much prefer if you informed potential r@pists not to do any r@ping tonight.

It'll take a while to sink in and I appreciate that.

That is stretching what the word blame actually means!

You can't r*pe yourself"

Maybe not, but a society can or part there of.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How about "educating" gangsters not to kill each other?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How does anyone know who a potential rap?st is. So what your saying is that man that warned you should have warned every man he met that nite about not ra?ping woman and probably get the shit kicked out of him. But no he warns you to HELP you and probably hoped you would take his advice so he could go home without going to a&e , and happy in the knowledge he helped you. Does that sink in.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I didn't 'spout shit'.

What I'm saying is- if you want to inform me on how not to get r@ped, I'd much prefer if you informed potential r@pists not to do any r@ping tonight.

It'll take a while to sink in and I appreciate that.

That is stretching what the word blame actually means!

You can't r*pe yourself

Maybe not, but a society can or part there of."

A society...

This will be good! Come on give us your reasoning

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By *ohnandGemCouple
over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

"I'm so bored of being responsible for other people, why does this have to fall on my shoulders?

A few nights ago I was walking home and I took a short cut through an unlit alleyway where a man stopped me to tell me not to take this short cut as a woman was r@ped here not long ago.

I asked him, instead of reminding me not to get r@ped, could he instead just remind every man he meets in the alleyway not to r@pe anyone. He got mightly pissed off with me.

This shit is exhausting.

And that's why those who are supporting the likes of hook when they say women "should be more careful" simply don't get it.

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"I didn't 'spout shit'.

What I'm saying is- if you want to inform me on how not to get r@ped, I'd much prefer if you informed potential r@pists not to do any r@ping tonight.

It'll take a while to sink in and I appreciate that.

And as I said earlier these discussions unveil mindsets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How does anyone know who a potential rap?st is. So what your saying is that man that warned you should have warned every man he met that nite about not ra?ping woman and probably get the shit kicked out of him. But no he warns you to HELP you and probably hoped you would take his advice so he could go home without going to a&e , and happy in the knowledge he helped you. Does that sink in. "

Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying, instead of warning me not to get r@ped, say to potential r@pists, that's he's there, watching, remembering faces, looking at his watch ready for his appearance on crimeline.

I've already been taught how not to get r@ped and that seems to be ok to you. Have men been taught how not to be r@pists? Apparently this point is abhorrent.

So down to the nitty gritty? How is it helping me? I'm already in a dark alley, the same alley I've cut through since I was 8 years old and will continue to cut through for the rest of my life. So how is it helping? Truly? How has reminding me not to get r@ped helped me?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You have lost the plot Julia

How do you identify the potential rapists and how effective do you think your message will be?

Well, I'll put that question back to you- how do you identify potential r@pe victims? Are they the ones in short skirts drinking too much?

That's the whole point, you can't predict the unpredictable and generally speaking the more negative the potential consequences the more precaution that is advised.

That why we have seat belts and speed limits and rules of the road as the consequences can be dire.

A r*pe is unrecoverable for most victims and hence there is some common wisdom used to reduce the chances.

You can be offended all you like, but if you can't heed a bit of common sense (generally speaking, that guy clearly would have had a nicer evening if he gave less of a fuck about you and said nothing) that's your own problem.

*No one is saying don't wear skirts that's an exaggeration

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By *ohnandGemCouple
over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

If women "kept themselves out of harm's way" there's be no meets happing on fab.

The irony.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I didn't 'spout shit'.

What I'm saying is- if you want to inform me on how not to get r@ped, I'd much prefer if you informed potential r@pists not to do any r@ping tonight.

It'll take a while to sink in and I appreciate that.

That is stretching what the word blame actually means!

You can't r*pe yourself

Maybe not, but a society can or part there of.

A society...

This will be good! Come on give us your reasoning

It really isnt rocket science, and goes back to the very basic tenet of what it is to be a woman, or rather others perception of what it is to be woman, the weaker of the sexes? There are cultures in society where women are treated as second class citizens, India being a prime example, where the abuse and r@pe of a woman is almost seen as a right of passage.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

We aren't in India

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"You have lost the plot Julia

How do you identify the potential rapists and how effective do you think your message will be?

Well, I'll put that question back to you- how do you identify potential r@pe victims? Are they the ones in short skirts drinking too much?

That's the whole point, you can't predict the unpredictable and generally speaking the more negative the potential consequences the more precaution that is advised.

That why we have seat belts and speed limits and rules of the road as the consequences can be dire.

A r*pe is unrecoverable for most victims and hence there is some common wisdom used to reduce the chances.

*No one is saying don't wear skirts that's an exaggeration "

So what about the huge percentage of children that are r***ed? How are they endangering themselves? What are they doing that puts them in harm's way?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Were you never told growing up not to take sweets from strangers?

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

Do you know what superflash, your advise is all good but it's also extremly patronising and already there under: https://m.fabswingers.com/articles/FAQ#safe_meeting

And even by taking all these measures you can still walk into an asshole who doesn't understand no is no or slips off the condom last second. While I normally can take your posts with humour, I've no tolerance when it comes down to r@pe. There's no excuse for it and to blame a victim is just appalling and your comments about freedom of speech or censorship are simply pathetic to say the least. Hook hung himself by questioning the woman's behaviour. Seriously most likely we've all done the one night stand we picked up in the bar, so are we all feather headed idiots? Being provocative is all good but you can push it too far. Less is more.

Here lil food for thought if it was your daughter that had been the victim would you go and blame her for what she endured because she wasn't cautious enough?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We aren't in India "

This is true, but we are in families, the workforce,education relationships etc, george hook is only a tiny part of the discussion, as is r@pe unfortunately.

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By *ohnandGemCouple
over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

"Were you never told growing up not to take sweets from strangers?

Saying "I'm not supposed to take sweets from strangers" works 100% of the time is stopping kids from being bundled into vans, I hear.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You have lost the plot Julia

How do you identify the potential rapists and how effective do you think your message will be?

Well, I'll put that question back to you- how do you identify potential r@pe victims? Are they the ones in short skirts drinking too much?

That's the whole point, you can't predict the unpredictable and generally speaking the more negative the potential consequences the more precaution that is advised.

That why we have seat belts and speed limits and rules of the road as the consequences can be dire.

A r*pe is unrecoverable for most victims and hence there is some common wisdom used to reduce the chances.

*No one is saying don't wear skirts that's an exaggeration "

I'm not offended.

I didn't need that man in a dark alleyway to remind me not to get r@ped.

This has nothing to do with seatbelts and speed limits- I'm not sure why you keep equating this to r@pe.

And finally, most people recover from r@pe, not what you said.

I think the point I'm failing to get across to you is this- I am CONSTANTLY being told how not to get r@ped and everyone is ok with this but one time, one time, I pull someone up on it and I'm the one who has 'lost the plot' according to your lexicon at least.

Imagine if I did, full time, to men what people do to me - remind everyone not to be going around r@ping. To you that is nuts but to me that's reality, that I'm always being reminded on how not to get r@ped. So my question to you is, why is that normal? Why is it ok for me to be told not to get r@ped? After all, everyone is a potential r@pe victim. But I can't tell potential r@pists not to go off r@ping tonight?

I'm putting this out there to get people to start truly thinking about this and I have no intention of stopping.

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By *atthewsundriMan
over a year ago

dundrum

"I'm so bored of being responsible for other people, why does this have to fall on my shoulders?

A few nights ago I was walking home and I took a short cut through an unlit alleyway where a man stopped me to tell me not to take this short cut as a woman was r@ped here not long ago.

I asked him, instead of reminding me not to get r@ped, could he instead just remind every man he meets in the alleyway not to r@pe anyone. He got mightly pissed off with me.

This shit is exhausting.

"
well said

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"Were you never told growing up not to take sweets from strangers?

And we all know that it's always a "stranger" that does the r*ping

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm not blaming anyone.

I copied those from the safety FAQ to support my point which is this (if you would actually listen... )

Good advice is still good advice

This rhetoric of "victim blaming"... (A very recent concept which barely even fits the definition of the word blame without gross exagerration) simply acts to subtract from the age old wisdom on how to maximise your chances of living happily to a ripe old age.

To me that is a modern development in the wrong direction.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Were you never told growing up not to take sweets from strangers?

And we all know that it's always a "stranger" that does the r*ping

Stop trying to use definitives where there are none

Clearly its a mix of strangers and non strangers

A precaution against a proportion of the aggressors is still worthy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's your glib remarks and inability to answer direct questions that make it hard for me to take you seriously.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This has nothing to do with seatbelts and speed limits- I'm not sure why you keep equating this to r@pe.

It has everything to do with the concept of reasonable precaution.

It just doesn't suit your argument.

Bad things = bad things

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's your glib remarks and inability to answer direct questions that make it hard for me to take you seriously."

They are purposefully glib in the face of weak reasoning

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By *longshottMan
over a year ago

Limerick

"I'm not blaming anyone.

I copied those from the safety FAQ to support my point which is this (if you would actually listen... )

Good advice is still good advice

To me that is a modern development in the wrong direction. "

Didn't you know the crime prevention officer is being renamed the victim blaming consultant. The crime of which we speak is abhorent but as with all crimes the ability to make yourself the easy target is just common sense. We are advised when going on holidays not to post on social media about it and most would heed this. I must say I have no idea how to not be a target in this particular crime but surely someone does but would they advise I wonder with the backlash they may get.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Were you never told growing up not to take sweets from strangers?

Saying "I'm not supposed to take sweets from strangers" works 100% of the time is stopping kids from being bundled into vans, I hear. "

Nothing works 100 percent of the time.

It's still good advice

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"You have lost the plot Julia

How do you identify the potential rapists and how effective do you think your message will be?

Well, I'll put that question back to you- how do you identify potential r@pe victims? Are they the ones in short skirts drinking too much?

That's the whole point, you can't predict the unpredictable and generally speaking the more negative the potential consequences the more precaution that is advised.

That why we have seat belts and speed limits and rules of the road as the consequences can be dire.

A r*pe is unrecoverable for most victims and hence there is some common wisdom used to reduce the chances.

*No one is saying don't wear skirts that's an exaggeration

I'm not offended.

I didn't need that man in a dark alleyway to remind me not to get r@ped.

This has nothing to do with seatbelts and speed limits- I'm not sure why you keep equating this to r@pe.

And finally, most people recover from r@pe, not what you said.

I'm putting this out there to get people to start truly thinking about this and I have no intention of stopping."

Everyone has the potential to be either a victim or perpetrator of r*pe. Valid mindset that does need to be addressed while also applying common sense about our own personal safety.

I am just wondering though would you have said the same thing to another woman in the alley way? I get your logic, reasoning and points but this isn't a gender issue completely...it's a human issue. I am a mother to both genders and have had identical discussions with them in relation to this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's your glib remarks and inability to answer direct questions that make it hard for me to take you seriously.

They are purposefully glib in the face of weak reasoning "

You're consistent- vague and glib.

I'll make it super clear for you- there is an important woman in your life who has been r@ped.

It could be your wife, your sister, your girlfriend, your daughter, your mother, your best friend, your cousin, she's someone special to you.

She will never tell you about it because she is ashamed and embarrassed. She didn't ask for it. She didn't want it. She can't talk about it. That's something that you will never know about and she will never talk to you about even if you ask her directly, she just won't ever let it out.

I've tried to get you to open your mind to understanding how exhausting it is having to think and be told all the time how not get r@ped. I wish you would try to understand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hook is a wanker, along with the guys on here defending him!

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"Were you never told growing up not to take sweets from strangers?

And we all know that it's always a "stranger" that does the r*ping

Stop trying to use definitives where there are none

Clearly its a mix of strangers and non strangers

A precaution against a proportion of the aggressors is still worthy "

Convenient quoting there. I asked you to apply your "responsibility for your own safety" logic to all the children that get r*ped and you came back with taking sweets from strangers as an argument!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Everyone has the potential to be either a victim or perpetrator of r*pe. Valid mindset that does need to be addressed while also applying common sense about our own personal safety.

Wise words and this my point...

Silencing George hook (who was probably terrible in the delivery but more or less right in his point) is acting to silence the message that every parent is rightfully giving their children.

Equating sound advice with "victim blaming" and thus silencing it in public discourse just plays in to the hands of the minority of perpetrators.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You have lost the plot Julia

How do you identify the potential rapists and how effective do you think your message will be?

Well, I'll put that question back to you- how do you identify potential r@pe victims? Are they the ones in short skirts drinking too much?

That's the whole point, you can't predict the unpredictable and generally speaking the more negative the potential consequences the more precaution that is advised.

That why we have seat belts and speed limits and rules of the road as the consequences can be dire.

A r*pe is unrecoverable for most victims and hence there is some common wisdom used to reduce the chances.

*No one is saying don't wear skirts that's an exaggeration

I'm not offended.

I didn't need that man in a dark alleyway to remind me not to get r@ped.

This has nothing to do with seatbelts and speed limits- I'm not sure why you keep equating this to r@pe.

And finally, most people recover from r@pe, not what you said.

I'm putting this out there to get people to start truly thinking about this and I have no intention of stopping.

Everyone has the potential to be either a victim or perpetrator of r*pe. Valid mindset that does need to be addressed while also applying common sense about our own personal safety.

Yes, I would have said the exact same thing. And I agree, it's not a gender issue which is why I would say the exact same thing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Convenient quoting there. I asked you to apply your "responsibility for your own safety" logic to all the children that get r*ped and you came back with taking sweets from strangers as an argument! "

It's the same message... "stay away from creeps you don't know"

You can't write advice to cover all scenarios but as a society we do our best

Do you take humbrude with the fab safety advice?

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By *ohnandGemCouple
over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

"It's your glib remarks and inability to answer direct questions that make it hard for me to take you seriously.

They are purposefully glib in the face of weak reasoning

You're consistent- vague and glib.

I'll make it super clear for you- there is an important woman in your life who has been r@ped.

It could be your wife, your sister, your girlfriend, your daughter, your mother, your best friend, your cousin, she's someone special to you.

I've tried to get you to open your mind to understanding how exhausting it is having to think and be told all the time how not get r@ped. I wish you would try to understand."

Fuckin' A.

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

"I'm not blaming anyone.

I copied those from the safety FAQ to support my point which is this (if you would actually listen... )

Good advice is still good advice

To me that is a modern development in the wrong direction. "

This isn't about rethoric or concepts, maybe you should get your head out of the academic clouds and join the real world for a while.

If I follow your thoughts gathered from your posts maybe we should all get paranoid and armed, it's a trend anyway since 9/11. May the strongest survive and forget about societies moral standards, laws and rules.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It's your glib remarks and inability to answer direct questions that make it hard for me to take you seriously.

They are purposefully glib in the face of weak reasoning

You're consistent- vague and glib.

I'll make it super clear for you- there is an important woman in your life who has been r@ped.

It could be your wife, your sister, your girlfriend, your daughter, your mother, your best friend, your cousin, she's someone special to you.

That could be right or it could be wrong. Either way it's conjecture.

There are two men I know however who have had that indignity... It's besides the point.

It may be exhausting for you but thankfully you are free to do what you like and ignore it. BUT the same advice may prevent it happening to someone else.

Aside from your personal irritation with the message, tell me how is that a bad thing?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/09/17 23:59:18]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not blaming anyone.

I copied those from the safety FAQ to support my point which is this (if you would actually listen... )

Good advice is still good advice

To me that is a modern development in the wrong direction.

This isn't about rethoric or concepts, maybe you should get your head out of the academic clouds and join the real world for a while.

I'm in the real world (where the same advice has existed for 100s if not 1000s of years) whereas victim blaming comes straight from feminist in the last 10 years...anyway

We have all sorts of protections in society for good reason. It's not about paranoia, it's about REASONABLE precaution. "

Remember not to r@pe anyone tonight.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm doing REASONABLE public service announcements.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You are a quack Julia

I've remembered it everyday ofy life.

Let's twist it...Do you honestly think that the guys who do it are simply uneducated on the subject matter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you think that women who are r@ped are asking for it because they don't wear their seatbelts?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bollix

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By *oghunter33Woman
over a year ago

on the hill NordWest of

"[Removed by poster at 15/09/17 23:59:18]"

Victim blaming goes way further back to fascism. Now you take it from there.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This isn't about rethoric or concepts, maybe you should get your head out of the academic clouds and join the real world for a while.

It's actually the opposite.... The same advice has been around for 100s of years whereas victim blaming has been invented by feminist academia in the last 10 years or so.

I get the arguments, it's hurtful to victims, it stops victims coming forward etc. but to me those things don't outweigh the benefits of trying to take care of yourself where you can.

Aside from a minority of knuckle heads, no reasonable person actually thinks that any victim deserved it regardless of the circumstances.

Prevention is always better than cure

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Do you think that women who are r@ped are asking for it because they don't wear their seatbelts?"

Is that really the best (non) point you have?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This isn't about rethoric or concepts, maybe you should get your head out of the academic clouds and join the real world for a while.

It's actually the opposite.... The same advice has been around for 100s of years whereas victim blaming has been invented by feminist academia in the last 10 years or so.

I get the arguments, it's hurtful to victims, it stops victims coming forward etc. but to me those things don't outweigh the benefits of trying to take care of yourself where you can.

Aside from a minority of knuckle heads, no reasonable person actually thinks that any victim deserved it regardless of the circumstances.

Prevention is always better than cure"

'Victim blaming' is from the book 'Blaming the Victim' by a Psychologist named William Ryan, written in 1974. It was also about racism. So that's your feminist theory in the last ten years out the window.

Maybe you should just stop now. Opinions, any opinions will never supersede actual real life experiences women have. Ever.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a point I knew would get your attention.

Just because advice is 100 years old doesn't make it accurate or effective.

R@pe is r@pe and you can fly the flag for George Hook, that is your right.

When someone gets r@ped, another person has forced themselves onto and into the victim. It hurts, physically and emotionally.

Whether the victim walked down a dark alley or into the wrong doctor's office, got into the wrong taxi, or the wrong party or the wrong office or the wrong Christmas party or the wrong housewarming, or whatever, it's all irrelevant. You can't prepare for r@pe because it doesn't happen the way you think it does or will. You can not predict it which is why it is illogical to tell people not to get r@ped.

What George Hooks comments did was highlight the fact that he thinks a woman's behaviour is responsible for the action of a r@pist. She was asking for it. She knew what she was getting into. She deserved it.

Women enjoy sex, you know that, you're here, on this site. If she wanted sex, she would have made that clear. In this case, she didn't want sex, she made that clear but somehow she is responsible for getting r@ped because she went back to a place with some people she was getting to know.

Taking precautions? How to not get r@ped? Explain explicitly how to do this. A real answer with real points.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This isn't about rethoric or concepts, maybe you should get your head out of the academic clouds and join the real world for a while.

It's actually the opposite.... The same advice has been around for 100s of years whereas victim blaming has been invented by feminist academia in the last 10 years or so.

I get the arguments, it's hurtful to victims, it stops victims coming forward etc. but to me those things don't outweigh the benefits of trying to take care of yourself where you can.

Aside from a minority of knuckle heads, no reasonable person actually thinks that any victim deserved it regardless of the circumstances.

Prevention is always better than cure

Maybe you should just stop now. Opinions, any opinions will never supersede actual real life experiences women have. Ever. "

Apologies, it was written in 1971.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for checking the facts, I was guestimating.. Guilty.. But either way it's a recent development and my point stands that while the intentions are noble anything that gets twisted to the point that good advice is forbidden is worrying.

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

Everyone has the potential to be either a victim or perpetrator of r*pe. Valid mindset that does need to be addressed while also applying common sense about our own personal safety.

Wise words and this my point...

Silencing George hook (who was probably terrible in the delivery but more or less right in his point) is acting to silence the message that every parent is rightfully giving their children.

Equating sound advice with "victim blaming" and thus silencing it in public discourse just plays in to the hands of the minority of perpetrators. "

Safety advice is good common sense and applies to all areas of our daily lives. That is a valid point. As is Julia's that it's as important to say don't do anyone harm in any shape or form. Having safety conversations with children all the way up to adulthood, you have to address all the but why's and balance it with what is age appropriate at the time. I remember standing in the hallway after one discussion and thinking how much of their trusting innocence is dissolved in order to keep them safe! We can not protect them from all, just arm them as best we can with a healthy balance of respect and safety.

This subject has been a gender blame game for years due to mindsets...you are both on the same page just different paragraphs. Team up your public service announcement and break both moulds.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Julia, you are exaggerating beyond belief.

We all know how dispicable it is...so enough of the "education"

To the best of my knowledge, that is a massive stretch from what was said.

You (collectively with your ilk) are putting words in his mouth.

He didn't say she deserves it or was asking for it but I'd like to get away from George as you taking being ridiculous and I've no interest in defending him... More só The general point he made.

Nothing is fully predictable or fully preventable but there are factors which can limit your chances. Of course you can just be very unlucky... As is the case in every r@pe unfortunately. Wrong place, time, circumstances and company.

Place

Time

Circumstances

Company

Only a fool would say that an individual has no control over those four factors.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've so missed everything and been so reluctant to take on any new view point.

People are r@ped in their homes by people they know at all hours of the day in the company of their family and friends. That happens more frequently than alleys and house parties.

I've enjoyed this conversation but I leave it feeling despondent. Good night to all and remember not to be r@ping anyone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I acknowledge that you can only protect against it so far and little can be done to compbat the known perpetrator.

No ill feelings, I just get infuriated by illogical people.

Sleep well

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"Julia, you are exaggerating beyond belief.

We all know how dispicable it is...so enough of the "education"

To the best of my knowledge, that is a massive stretch from what was said.

You (collectively with your ilk) are putting words in his mouth.

He didn't say she deserves it or was asking for it but I'd like to get away from George as you taking being ridiculous and I've no interest in defending him... More só The general point he made.

Place

Time

Circumstances

Company

Only a fool would say that an individual has no control over those four factors.

No. They are the circumstances of every r*pe, not the reason.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's implicit that the rapist is the reason

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By *ohnandGemCouple
over a year ago

Louth/Meath/Dublin

I'll leave this here.

http://www.scarymommy.com/daughter-permission-kick-your-son-in-the-balls/?utm_source=FB

Goodnight.

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

Everyone has the potential to be either a victim or perpetrator of r*pe. Valid mindset that does need to be addressed while also applying common sense about our own personal safety.

Wise words and this my point...

Silencing George hook (who was probably terrible in the delivery but more or less right in his point) is acting to silence the message that every parent is rightfully giving their children.

Equating sound advice with "victim blaming" and thus silencing it in public discourse just plays in to the hands of the minority of perpetrators.

This subject has been a gender blame game for years due to mindsets...you are both on the same page just different paragraphs. Team up your public service announcement and break both moulds."

As a parent also, this is how I feel.

I recall the advice I got about safety when I was a child and I recall it being directed more to my sisters than me and being repeated more to them.

It's an age old thing, women are the weaker sex. Not sure it applies quite as much today, thankfully. I know quite a few ladies who could kick the crap out of me if they so desired, which was not the case 20yrs ago.

Not that that's what we're talking about. Not just physically, before I get shouted at for that!

Yes, sorry Julia but the guy didn't say you might be r@ped, he just told you some unfortunate woman was recently (I'm assuming it was a woman). I do think he was probably surprised by your reaction, as he was merely saying Take the Long Way Round, the better lit, safer route. This is common sense in any big city. Small, dark alleyways are the "traps" any hunter (human/animal predators) would take advantage of.

No matter what we do, no matter how much education we give either sex, in general or to specific genders, it doesn't matter. There will always be anomalies. That's why there are serial killers, r@pists, etc. I'm sorry but it's a fact of life. We aren't all the same, we won't all react to stimuli in the same manner, some of those reactions will be abhorrent.

We need to be wary in circumstances which call for us to do so. Yes, you should hold your keys between your fingers, or around a can of Mace, regardless of who you are, if you are somewhere you feel unsafe. It doesn't matter what you're wearing. If a mugger wants to rob you, they will try regardless. I'm fairly sure a r@pist is driven, so the same applies.

2 things:

1. It's great to see a forum debate like this and let's remain civil to each other.

2. I didn't hear the Right Hook but at least it's out in the open and being discussed, though I don't think any other site is doing it as much justice as here.

Ok 3rd thing.

I despise any physical/emotional violence to any person, regardless of any perceived justification.

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By *adame BWoman
over a year ago

C'est moi Boudoir

"It's implicit that the rapist is the reason "

But what mindset makes the r*pist think it's ok to do this? There are vulnerable people outside of the controls of the four points for varying reasons. A person who is diligently aware of their own personal safety can find themselves in dangerous predicaments regardless and people who will take advantage of that. Also predatory people tend to find ways around people's safety precautions.

One example...drink spiking. Easily done.

Another example...date r*pe, not stranger danger.

Children - no control over all 4.

Marital r*pe

The list goes on...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He used "blame" and "rape victim" in the same sentence. Simple as that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately there's lots scumbags out there so I think women need be more cautious and I know most women think that as victim blaming but its not as we want you to be safe and just use some caution and cop on in some situations as those scumbags are evil and are always liable to attack. Sick world we live in cant even let kids play out in the streets in fear some sicko abducting them

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By *owdyboy 890Man
over a year ago

Country West

There is still court cases going on from incidents 40 or 50 years ago because of people coming forward and identifying who was involved in it xx

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