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A Guide to Fab Profiles

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Firstly, I just wish to stress the the following post is strongly tongue in cheek

No doubt done before but inspired by the not too distant 'verifications and their true meanings' thread, I thought we all may have our own definitions and light hearted interpretations for certain profile sayings, buzzwords and characteristics

I'm sure there's plenty and we all have our own! Remeber, my tongue is firmly in my cheek

Athletic = USSR era Shot Put physique

35 years old = 53 years old

Slim = Can still fit through a door

Parties & socials only = Alcoholic

Genuine = Won't turn up

Have Kik/Whatsapp/e-mail = Gimme all your pics

VWE = I've mastered the zoom on my phone

Never had any complaints = Because I've never met anyone off here

Up for anything = DEAR GOD, PLEASE, JUST PICK ME!

Good hygiene is a must = I have a glove box full of KFC wet wipes

Experienced = Chronic masterbater

No face pics because of work = I look like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle

Professional = Won't turn up

Can't accommodate = Wife's always at home

Can't travel = Wife's taken the car to work

Looking for 18-99 = Will ride anything

Looking NSA fun = Will ride anything

Not looking to bed the site = Will ride anything

Generous = Will let you ride me

6' = 5'6"

Social drinks first = Get me d*unk and I'm yours

Reliable = Won't turn up

Dominant = Caught the last 30 minutes of '50 Shades' on TV last night

Adventurous = Hoor

Gym fit = Had a free trial membership in '03

Genuine, reliable professional = Your own fault if you still expect me to turn up at this point

*runs off to check profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Young at heart - decrepit

Been here before and know the ropes - couldn't get a ride then either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Open-minded = will ride anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm very picky" = till she gets d*unk

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By *onniebumWoman
over a year ago

Tell ya later

Looking for fun/fun loving/funny guy/gal = you'll die laughing if you see me naked

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By *ingerrrrWoman
over a year ago

Meath

I won't bite unless you want me too- thinks that's uber kinky

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By *rs Pink PantherWoman
over a year ago

The Darkest Side

Pete I'm banged to rights I'm an alcoholic

Sane and sociable = the answer is rhetorical

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Discrete = married (and can't spell)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Quality over quantity = will fuck you but you won't get a verification

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mail me .... no really mail me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is funny

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'Working Professional', as opposed to all of us amateur workers on Fab

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"'Working Professional', as opposed to all of us amateur workers on Fab"

This gave me a giggle lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got any questions just ask"

I'm going to agree to whatever you say because I'm too lazy to write what I actually like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 12/07/17 23:13:53]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fiery = Psychotic. Turn back quick. Delete! Delete! Delete!

Stunner = Stunned how you ever went there.

Great Personality = Ugly as fook.

AGE 34 = Age 43.

Fun = Annoying

Lives life to the full = Lives with mammy.

Can't accommodate = Lives with mammy.

A challenge = High maintenance pain in the arse.

Easy going = Will fuck anything.

Loyal = Stalker. This brain cannot process the words: 'I don't think you're quite right for me.'

Sensitive = Will go ape shit if you don't notice her new pic, new fringe, new status and other banal shite.

Honest = Says whatever comes into their head first. Mostly derogatory stuff about other fabbers.

Rugby Athletic = Who ate all the pies?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This thread is funny!! But some soo true

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 word

Tara

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Quality over quantity = will fuck you but you won't get a verification"
had that,even though I got second helpings!

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By *ohndunboyneMan
over a year ago

Dunboyne & Dublin

I'm ecstatic! According to this I'm still Slim! Excellent. Rushes off to update profile and be a lying bastard

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm ecstatic! According to this I'm still Slim! Excellent. Rushes off to update profile and be a lying bastard "

It's the 'adventurous with good hygiene a must' updates I'd keep an eye on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good thread Pete

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lives life to the full = addicted to several illegal substances

Clean = well, I showered on Sunday

Love party invites = can't even get a coffee meet

We're not hardened swingers = in denial

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love to make a woman squirt = one-trick pony

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So I'm an alcoholic who's wife is always at home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Will fill in later = only here to top up the wank bank

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

420 friendly= loves Scania's

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is a repeater-has taken too many viagra and can't get it down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is a repeater-has taken too many viagra and can't get it down "

ROFL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah Pete! This is hilarious! Brilliant start to my morning. Well done everyone!

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By *oluptuousMom.Woman
over a year ago

New Ross

Was here before = Maybe if I do a new profile I can mail those that blocked me last time.

Not meeting at the moment = The Rash hasn't cleared up yet.

Whoop Whoop Road Trip Time = I can't get a local meet for love nor money.

I have a busy life outside of fab = If I pull in pub I won't be looking for a meet here.

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